Tag: Tomorrow

Ashes to Ashes

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Ashes to Ashes

We often don’t think much about the draw of time on our bodies, or about time itself. I’ve been taking some time to think about what it was God said to Adam in the Garden of Eden just prior to his exile: 

By the sweat of your face

You will eat bread,

Till you return to the ground,

Because from it you were taken;

For you are dust,

And to dust you shall return.”

— Genesis 3:19

You must work, and work hard all the days of your life. You will eat the product of your work till your days end. This is the curse on which the human race is forced to live. Our lives are bound to the linear decay, a beginning, and an end of time. We face tomorrow with optimism, even though we have seen the perpetual onslaught of unanticipated trials and tribulations. While some people may plan for the future to have some struggles, it’s the reality that life will throw untold amount of struggles our way that we will never truly be able to plan for, or avoid. How do we handle life’s day to day struggles? We must face our lives with dignity and strength. How though is this done? When our struggle is the nature of time itself, we must understand our lives are truly only in the present. 

Jesus tells us not to worry about tomorrow, that it would worry for itself. Our lives are the moments in which we live. Sure, we can plan for tomorrow, but it’s the here and now, we must truly focus on. The little muscle in your mouth, what is said, how does it make others feel? What kinds of hurt does the tongue cause, and the damage does it do once those words are sent into the air. We cannot undo, nor can we live in the past. We often get stuck in a moment in time of the past. When I was a younger man, I experienced trauma, after trauma, after trauma, and in my own way, unbeknownst to those around me, I too remained trapped in moments of time. As a child, I learned how to use compartmentalization for every incident I faced. In a moment of weakness, a total loss of control, I faced my own mortality. A moment in time, when for a second, time seemed to stop. In that moment, the culmination of my failures tumbled down like castles built on sand, drowning in a tidal wave of regret, disappointment, and pictures of the trauma running through my mind. My world fell apart in a moment in time. But, since then, small moments have built upon one, and then another, and eventually life changed, and we rest upon today, this very moment where I am typing one word after another. I have survived trauma, after trauma, and several life changing events. I have overcome some pretty big obstacles as I have faced death head on, and God pulled me through, not myself. I do not have the power to beat death, but God has the power, that in me, He overcame the death of a soul, and as far as my physical body, God has seen fit to bring me through the brink of death, now many times over. A few weeks ago, my heart stopped as I lay in bed, aware the pacemaker would stop, and aware the inevitable outcome would likely be my heart stopping, and I would feel it slow, the world around me would fade, and black would surround me. The brink of death was upon me, and I had no control over it. When the time comes in our lives, the end of that verse will play out, from dust we came, from dust we shall return. God knows the date each of us will be conceived, and He knows the date we will draw our final breath. It’s this knowledge we must face the truth, there are only two things that truly matter in this life, our faith in Christ, and the people in our lives. 

On a regular basis we neglect the people in our lives by the things we say, the things we do, or more aptly, the things we don’t do. In reality, do we love others the way we should? Do we show that love to the people we care about? Do we show up when they need us the most? How do we spend our days, and what do we spend our days doing? What is it we focus on? What is it we put our time and effort into? These things often not only take our gaze off of our so called loved ones, but our Lord also. We have so little precious time with our loved ones, and yet we are derelict in our affections. Not only do we have sin in our lives against a Holy God, that sin goes out against those in our lives. Is the idol in our lives appointments? Is the idol in our lives, sports, work, alcohol, drugs, sex, or something else? We often fill our lives with stuff, and it’s that stuff that takes our focus from God, and the people in our lives. We let these many distractions of the world remove us from the lives of the people we once cared for. Days turn to weeks, turn to years, and we’ve all of a sudden lost track of people we once loved. The years creep in between, and before you know it, a car accident, an illness, something makes all the stuff we filled our lives with seem worthless and meaningless. How did we let so much time go by before we reached out? How did we let so much time go by before we told that person how we felt? How do we let that much time go by without talking to God? Time is not an ally, it’s an enemy. We can neither reason with it, or do anything to buy more of it. When time is up, it’s up. What did we do with the time that was given to us? Did we use it wisely, or did we waist it? Did we use the time God gave to us to glorify Him, and to share His gospel, to grow the kingdom? If we are evaluated on our time management, how well do we score? When sharing the love of Christ is the card in which we are judged. 

This is not a new perspective of mine, but rather one that has presented itself to me multiple times in my life. Having so many near death experiences tends to do that to a person. The difference now, rather than in my past, is in my past, I was the victim of hardships, rather than the survivor of hardships. My surviving, is not of my own doing, but the will of God. The will of God in my life is that He be glorified in my trials. Much like Steven, or Paul, Joseph, or Moses, praising God in the storm is how they got through it. Today, in this time, many people only praise God when life is good, but the moment something takes away that good feeling, God becomes the enemy. The reality is, we face a very real enemy in our lives, and it isn’t God. We are in a battle, just one we cannot see. All around us there’s a battle for our souls, and our lives. Demons roam this world sewing chaos, deception, and dissension among the mortal men. Angels go around nurturing those in need, bringing peace, and comfort, wisdom, and guidance. The war for our souls is won in Jesus Christ, because the end of time is already written, but today, here and now, we are still in the battle. Do we stand ready to fight in the here and now, or do we allow the world to dictate terms? Do we fight for what God told us to do, by loving one another thus fulfilling the Law? We are to love, and love takes effort. Love takes nurturing a baby fire, or a raging fire, but always tending to its needs. If the fire is left unattended, just like my fireplace, the fire will go out. Love takes action, and when we love the people in our lives, it takes action to show them love. How do we show up for them? Is it a text, or a call, a visit, or a card in the mail? With today’s technology, we have never been able to reach out to someone more easily to keep in touch, yet we have never been more distant from one another. Our own brilliance has been used as a tool by the Devil to separate us. Sadly, it worked. 

If heart surgery has taught me nothing else, it’s to cherish every moment. I myself am not afraid to die, in fact, in many ways, I long for it. That is not me wishing it would come today, but knowing what my tomorrow brings is something I long for. To have a glorified body, without the pain, without the tears, or the suffering of this world, but to live in paradise with the creator of the universe. The problem with death for a believer, is the hardships your absence brings to those who loved you and those you love. Sadly, I have seen it too often where the death of a friend is the catalyst that brings people together. It’s death that brings friends and family together who haven’t seen one another in years, who haven’t talked in that time. Death reminds us for a fleeting moment, that we haven’t talked in forever. Yet, in our day to day, we do nothing to change it. My wish for you is to look at your life and seek after those whom you love. Do not take time for granted because it isn’t your friend. Time slows, nor stops for anyone, and it bends it’s will to only our creator. What are you doing with the time given to you? One day we will return to the dust in which we were created. We cannot fight our expiration date. We may be able to extend life, or even push death back a little, but even those things are predestined by a Holy God. My open-heart surgery did not take God by surprise, and it is not lost on me that given this happened 30 years ago, I would likely have died. I was predestined to experience everything over the last few weeks, and how I handled them, do my actions highlight Christ, yes, or no? This is the biggest question I must answer for. Am I showing, and sharing love? Are people my focus, or is it other things? All these things I will answer for, along with my sins upon the day of judgment. Today is not the day I die, but perhaps, it’s the day I die to myself. Scripture tells us to die to one’s self, pick up thine cross and follow Christ. Carry that cross for all the world to see. Let the world know that you die to yourself, allowing the Holy Spirit to dwell inside you. Bringing your soul to life from the dead man/woman, you were. Being born again, and realizing the true bondage is that of sin, and that through sin, the world has a hold on you. The world tells you a load of lies, and we live according to them. What it means to be successful, to be beautiful, to be liked, or respected, but the biblical replies do not match with that of the world. Following Christ means we live different, we look different, we act different, we become different then the world. Our priorities change, and with that change, our relationships begin to change. Let us never forget why we are to love, and let us never forget what it means to love. Love is to lay down ones life for a friend. Love is to love like Christ loved and died for the church. Love is to be patient and kind, never jealous, never bragging or being arrogant. It never acts unbecomingly, and does not seek to lift up ones self, but lifting up others. It is not provoking, nor is it provoked. It does not keep track of the wrongs done, but washes away the wrong as our sins are washed away as if the slate was made new. Love, loves and rejoices in the truth, as it bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, and endures all things. Love never fails. Do we truly have the guile to say we love others like this? Many cannot say they truly love their own spouses like this. Yet, this is what we are called to do. This is how scripture defines love. This is the love we are called to love one another and our enemies, yet the smallest argument ends friendships. We face an enemy that is crafty like no other, and he wants to destroy you, to break you, to separate you, and ultimately, to devour your spirit, separating you from God. Satan uses time as his ally, and a weapon against humanity. While he cannot control time and space, he can entice us to forsake friends and family, and ignore our responsibilities. Sadly, we allow this to happen time and time again. 

I hope you read this and you find the time for old friends, and existing ones. I hope you find the time for your family, your spouse, your kids, but most importantly, that you find the time for God. My prayer is that you will seek God daily, and you give God the time He deserves. I pray you let go of worldly things that do little for your life, but does a lot to pull you away from important things. I’m not saying it isn’t okay to have hobbies like bowling, or fishing, hunting, or other things, but use those things to grow your relationships, or use those things to grow closer to God. While you’re fishing do you talk with God? While your bowling, do you share Jesus with your team, or the team next to you? While your kids are at soccer, do you let Jesus flow from your behavior? Let us use the time we have better. Let us continue to seek Jesus, and then share Jesus. Let us love others like we are truly called to love one another. Let us remember who the true enemy is, and focus on preparing for battle, because make no mistake, the next battle is right around the corner. Those who do not prepare, will be unequipped to handle it. We must be ready to fight, to hold fast, and know the word, so when the temptation comes, you can be ready with the word of God. Whole Armor of God, a soldier ready for the battle and never out of the fight. We fight till the day the Lord calls us home. Till that day comes, may God bless you, and may the Holy Spirit fill you, and let your cup fillith over.  

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Our Actions Have Weight

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Our Actions Have Weight 

We are but men walking along this path, with no road map, or knowledge of tomorrows fore comings. The hope we have in the struggles of this world is only found in a name, Jesus Christ. We fumble along the walk and even when we are beaten down to the ground; even when the world is unfair, and even when it seems like everything, we’ve built crumbles around us, there is still hope in the power of Jesus. We can’t always see the light through the storm, but it’s always there. The struggle we have to get up the next day, and continue to push forward must be contained and set aside. The plans for our future is known by our Father alone, and we cannot from our tiny viewpoint say with certainty we know what will come tomorrow. We must not allow fear to dictate our actions, nor shall we allow that fear to destroy our resolve to trust in our Heavenly Father. 

Something very precious was taken from me recently, and I must trust that even in the hardest of days, Christ has something better in store for me. Christ will use this unfortunate tragedy in my life and a new path, a better plan would be made clear. Nevertheless, the pain I feel is very real. The struggle of course is a challenge, one that will take time to overcome. In my life there have been few things I have been proud of myself about, and loosing something in my life that I found so important, is beyond tough. In 2004 I was on a nice little walk, a pack that weighed around 70 pounds, and very little sleep. Up till the little walk, I had not had much in the weight of protein, or nutrition, and the odds of completing such a trek were small. After several hours of struggle, turning a corner and seeing the building I had called home for over 20 weeks straight in front of me. The tears fell from my eyes out of pride for myself, that I had accomplished something I did not believe was possible, and something so many had told me I would fail. In a short time, I would stand at attention and be granted the right to carry my cross sabers. I would hold my head high and beam with self-pride. I never became prideful, but I had a new self-respect I had not known before. When I was wounded in the war and my career would end before my eyes, I felt lost, and I remained lost for many years. 

Eventually I would find my path, but it would take several years. I would struggle for years to come till yet again the world as I knew it crumbled beneath my feet. I would yet again find myself unsure of my path, but a short time later the path was made clear. I found a place I would eventually call home. When I believed I had found a new place, a place for me to truly serve, that was short lived. I guess the point I’m trying to make is, life can suck, life can be unfair, life can be difficult as putting it mildly, but no matter what words describe the challenges faced, we must always remember who’s still sitting on the throne, and who is still in control. Relieving ones self of the responsibility, the need and desire to remain in control is vastly needed to be at peace. We are not in control, and we are not in charge. While we do have a say in how we manage our situations, and we do have a say into some of the circumstances we find ourselves, we are only in charge of our own personal actions and how we react in any given situation. In all places we find ourselves we must ask, and truly pray on it, what would Jesus do? What we do and how we do it will either represent Christ or the other guy. We always have a choice, and that choice will reflect Jesus in our heart. Be conscious of your choices, be respectful of the power you have to hold Christ in your heart, and in your actions reflect Christ to those in your circle. Be slow to action, and think about those actions first. Actions may have a wider effect then you may know, and because of that, as a Christian we must be more cautious then that of the world. Much like the ability to lift Thors hammer we must be worthy. Who are we underneath is represented by our actions and how we choose to respond to difficult circumstances? Will you lift the cross, or let the world blind you? 

Strange Tomorrow’s

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Strange Tomorrow’s 

The world’s a difficult and mysterious place to be. Sometimes the decisions of life past and the world we know or thought we knew is flipped on it’s head. How do we look at life when we haven’t a clue what tomorrow brings? How do we place our faith in the world we cannot possibly fathom or even prepare for? I suppose somedays, or maybe even every day, living in this world requires a daily renewal of faith. How do we renew our faith? Isaiah 40:31 (NKJV)31 “But those who wait on the Lord Shall renew their strength; They shall mount up with wings like eagles, They shall run and not be weary, They shall walk and not faint.” Our prayers to God, our trust in God, and trusting in His word is vital to our daily renewal of faith by getting into the word. 

Taking my new place in this world as a serious charge, I bare many burdens. I hold onto the secrets, confessions, and struggles of those I encounter on the job. What about in my own life, how do I face tomorrow and know that I am doing the right things today? Jesus is the way, and we find strength his blood daily. 

Taking a leap of faith isn’t easy but it’s something we have to do. WE….. I need to learn to trust in the Lord and have faith that He is leading me down the right path. There will always be questions in life, and there will always be uncertainties. The path of tomorrow may not be an easy one, and even when the path seems so right and so clear, that doesn’t ever mean it’ll be easy. The world requires so much effort, and fortitude sometimes it seems, though bigger than anyone can face. How I move forward will show my worth. The change in the weather as a new season comes forward, feelings arise like lava out of a volcano. There is fear in this world, in this life, and a wonder, a curiosity, an inkling of question if I am worthy of yet another chance. Have I suffered long to be rewarded? Has my life led me to this point to be granted some peace in this world? Soldiers trained for battle, trained for war are never quite the same after. Those who have fought the fight are forever soldiers at heart. How does a soldier find peace? 

This world last but just a little while, and as it’s said we are to count our days, cherish our time, and learn and grow into a heart of wisdom through our time. All I can do today, is pray, and make a choice and stick with the choice. Tomorrow is never certain, and especially when we consider how we get from here to there. What is it Christ said? “Worry not for tomorrow will worry for itself.” I wouldn’t mind getting a clear signal from God. I wouldn’t mind knowing that tomorrow will come without major hurdles. The days are tough enough as it is, I just wish I knew I could see the answers for tomorrow. Since I can’t see what lays ahead, all I can do is pray the unique circumstances in which I find myself isn’t just my own fear talking, but truly the way God tells me to go. 

Time comes, and the message comes, even when we aren’t sure what it says right away. The world is a strange place and when weird opportunities come up, roll with it, and embrace the strange. 

Encouragement

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Encouragement

You might be going through so much today, broken hearted, jobless, health issues, family problems, no matter what you’re going through know that Psalm 118:24“Today is the Lord has made so be glad and rejoice in it.” We can worry ourselves sick, and we can stress over everything going on in our lives, but and I get it, it’s easy to forget the most important thing to remember, God is still on the Throne. I know what it’s like to see the worst humanity has to offer. I know what it’s like to face unknown health problems. I have been through two horrible divorces, so I know that there are days when the world seems like its going to fall down on your head. Rest assured it isn’t, and no matter how dark it may seem today, Jesus is always with you. If you feel you can’t make it, just start with baby steps. Realize that tomorrow is a tomorrow problem. If you can’t face tomorrow, face today. You are a child of the King, and you are royalty, made for a purpose. Jesus loves you, and as you are known before you took your first breath, know that God knows every hair on your head, and you are just the way He wants you to be. Tomorrow might look scary, and you may think there’s no way out of your current situation but there always is. God never sends us into a problem without the tools to fix it. God always equips us to handle any situation we may face. Sometimes that’s the people God puts in our path, sometimes it’s a song on the radio, but He always gives us what we need. It’s our job to go through life with an open heart, and a love of Jesus Christ, and trusting and having faith in our place with the Lord. No matter if our path is to beautiful streams, green pastures, or the valley of death, the Lord is with you always.

I have had my share of ups and downs, and lately the struggle of depression has been very real for me. I have questioned if I’d be alone for the foreseeable future, and I’ve wondered if my living situation would ever change. I have doubted my self worth, and I have questioned my place in this world. You aren’t weak if you ask yourself these things, or if you feel these things, you’re normal. Dealing with life can be difficult, but when you truly understand that Jesus is the Truth, The way, the life, we know that there is hope on the horizon. It can be hard to see sometimes, and through the pounding of the storm, it can most certainly be hard to hear, but know that Christ is walking next to you every step of the way. When we are at our lowest we often search for meaning, we want answers to why we’re suffering, and it’s simple, sinful world. Our suffering is caused by our own sin, the sin of others, or just nature. Christ overcame sin, and gave us something to look forward to. Remember though even in our salvation, is a story of pain and sacrifice. Jesus bore the cross, took the beating, faced the pain, and the ridicule so we wouldn’t die without hope. Who are we to think we won’t suffer a little along the way if our own savior suffered for us? The Apostles were without hope in this days and nights after Christ’s crucifixion. They were lost and discouraged, but the morning came on the third day and Christ returned. The doubts were laid to rest as they found he was truly resurrected. After that they went with hope, with love, and with confidence to face the world in which they would most surely die for what they would preach. They didn’t fear what would come, so why should we? We may not have been able to walk with Jesus, but Jesus walks with us, and is in our hearts if we only let Him change our lives. Jesus can heal a broken heart, can give us peace in the storms, and show us the way through the fire. All we are asked is not to be afraid, and be courageous. Find your strength in Christ, and never give up the fight.

The Lover After You

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The Lover After You

I was in love, and I was loyal, you took my heart, and you broke it. I took the blame, it was all my fault. What did I do, that was so very wrong? Time went on, and time began to heal, God saw fit to send me to you. Years go by, and the love grew strong, till one day, something was wrong. You decided to leave, you found someone knew, despite the promises between me and you. I watched you leave, as my heart shattered, what could I do, a life without you?

It’s been two years now since my wife left, two years this month. As September is known in my life as the month of Hell, I find it fitting I have started trauma therapy in the month of September. There’s been a lot of emotions lately that have sprung forth from the deepest depths of my psyche, and I often don’t know what to do with them. I find myself longing for companionship now two years later. With very little activity in that department, I have found myself becoming discouraged. The advice I was given recently pointed out that my relationship and trust in God might not be as strong as it should be. I have been thinking about how complete my life would be if I found someone special, but the truth is, God it seems has other plans for me right now. I can’t help but wonder why God’s seen it fit to keep me alone, but in this time of separation, I need to be reminded of the power of the Holy Spirit and trust that God’s grace is sufficient for me. 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NKJV)9 “And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

It’s not an easy thing feeling alone and isolated. It’s not an easy thing to desire something with all your fiber of your being, and being told no over and over again. It’s not easy seeing so much happiness come from so much pain. Knowing that God works in every situation, and knowing that in ever instance we have a choice to work to bring glory to God in our actions, or to let opportunities pass us by. I can never be whole without God, and there’s a hole in my heart. It’s likely I’ve been trying to fill it and pack it full of hopes for the future and not actually asking God what His plan is for me. While God will sometimes give you the desires of your heart, God always answers prayers in His time, not our own. Sometimes unanswered prayers are the blessing, and we need to realize that God can not only see the present, but our future also. We must learn to turn to God and allow God’s love to fill us up. We must trust in the love of our Father and crawl into his lap when we feel sorrow. We must learn to trust in Him, and we must learn to be patient in our wait for prayers to be answered. We must learn to continue moving forward and continue running the race even while we wait for the Lord to grant us our desires. It’s not an easy thing waiting on the Lord but we must wait with faith, and know that in God’s time things are perfect for us, and we must be bold, we must be confident because that trust in the Lord must be absolute. We don’t have to like everything God does, but we have to respect it. We can argue with God all we want but we will always loose.

I wait for a new love to find me. I wait for the new tomorrow I have longed so much for. I wait, but I must learn to do so with more patience and more understanding. More importantly, I must remember that it’s not me that’s the problem. I must learn to treat myself with more respect. I must learn that I am worthwhile, and I am worthy of love. I must learn that I am not what I have believed for many years. I am not worthless, and I am worthy of someone’s love. I am special and I have a lot to offer someone that may come into my life. I cannot let the Devil tell me otherwise. I must keep my heart clean from the lies I’m told every day in my life. For so many years I’ve believed the lies that were told to me, and now I’m trying to rewrite a lifetime of beliefs that are harmful. It’s not easy to move forward after you loose something so precious to you. It’s not easy fighting back against the constant rejection and testing of your faith, but in all things Christ will overpower the lies of the Devil. Know in your heart that when someone leaves you, or when someone cheats, cheating isn’t about you it’s about them. It’s about their own personal gratification and what they will do to feel good, no amount of pain they cause others will stop them. You will find a new love someday, have faith in God, and trust in the plan.

Silent Prayer

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Silent Prayer

I sit here in the dark, on my bed, with just the dim lights from my new Lego set and the computer. The sounds of classical music come from the speakers of my laptop. I realized I haven’t really spent much time with God lately. I’ve been so busy worrying about school, and worrying about my other stressors in my life, that I have forgotten to pray. I have been thinking lately of all the trials I’ve gone through, and I realized I cannot do this on my own. I have been hearing the voices telling me I’m not worthy of God’s grace. The voice tells me I’m a failure, and I’ll never amount to anything. I hear the storm is too strong, and I’ll never make it. While I know this is all lies, it’s hard for me to continue being rejected, to continue failing, falling flat on my face, and not feel those negative feelings. So, when you find yourself low, and you don’t know what else to do, prayer is the first place you should go. Prayer is something we need to be doing every day, and according to scripture it’s something we need to do without ceasing. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-1816 “Rejoice always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” The first thing we are told is to rejoice, and while sometimes this may seem difficult it’s important to remember that even in our hardships we have an opportunity to praise Jesus because it gives us a chance to show others how Christians ought to behave in times of trouble. We can witness to others even in our own trials and tribulations, if we remember to turn to Christ in even the darkest of days.

One thing we forget to do is pray even when things are going great. We forget to rejoice when the world is peachy keen and everything is going right. We forget to thank God for the blessings we have, and even when it seems like we have so very little, we fail to put some perspective on what we do have. I have been to 3rdworld countries where I have seen poverty that we can’t fathom here in our country. While we do have homeless, even our homeless eat better then those in other countries. I’ve seen people who don’t eat at all if they don’t work, and many don’t get the chance to work simply because of where they live. I have watched as children have begged for food simply because it may have been days since the last time they had a meal. Even when we feel we have little, to other parts of the world, we are rich.

So in my time here in the dark, I find myself struggling between the flesh and the spirit. Romans 7:21-25 21 “I find then a law, that evil is present with me, the one who wills to do good. 22 For I delight in the law of God according to the inward man. 23 But I see another law in my members, warring against the law of my mind, and bringing me into captivity to the law of sin which is in my members. 24 O wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? 25 I thank God—through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, with the mind I myself serve the law of God, but with the flesh the law of sin.” As Paul explains there is a war going on inside him. The war of the laws of Sin, and his desire to do good battle with one another. As I struggle with the feelings I have, knowing that God’s grace is sufficient for me, it’s hard to stay positive. Even knowing what Jesus has done for me, the struggle is still strong. Sometimes, I feel like I’m not a ‘good’ Christian because I have such negative feelings about myself. Sometimes when I feel low, I feel like I’ve done something wrong, and I’m not where I should be in my faith. But then, once again I realize that those are all the lies from Lucifer himself trying to bring me down, to raise doubts, and to do harm in my relationship with God.

David himself struggled a great deal with doubts, with depression, with hardships, and even in the very end he was considered a man after God’s own heart. This is a man who faltered a great deal, and by all mortal accounts was an awful man. While we would deem his actions and behavior deplorable and knowing those types of things would not happen today and have anyone get away with them, he repented of his sins. He did however suffer the consequences of his actions. We must remember to pray and in our prayers follow the standard Christ gave to us.

Matthew 6:9-13

9 In this manner, therefore, pray:

Our Father in heaven,

Hallowed be Your name.

10 Your kingdom come.

Your will be done

On earth as it is in heaven.

11 Give us this day our daily bread.

12 And forgive us our debts,

As we forgive our debtors.

13 And do not lead us into temptation,

But deliver us from the evil one.

[a]For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.

 

Many people believe that these are the words to pray, but that’s not what Christ said, He said “IN THIS MANNER” so he was merely citing an example of how to pray. Addressing who you are praying to. Then he brings glory to the one whom you pray to. He’s then saying, whatever your will is, I will accept because you are great, and I am not. He offers thanks for the needs we have that are met by the Lord. Then he asks for forgiveness for the wrongs we’ve done, and in turn offers forgiveness to those whom we have wronged. He asks for the strength to avoid the temptations of the flesh, of sin, and to rise above the powers of Satan in this fallen world. He ends with acknowledging the power of God, in Heaven, on Earth, and the glory of God. Within that template you can ask God for the desire of your soul. You can bring your prayer requests for those you feel the need to pray for. God wants to have a conversation with you, and hopes you will come to the Father with all the troubles, and desires of your heart. So when we sit in the dark, in our quite place away from the world, away from technology, and when we can actually hear ourselves think, we need to remember what’s important, and what is right with our relationship with the Lord. Don’t give up and don’t despair in the dark days, today, or tomorrow.

 

 

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What Do You See?

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What Do You See?

My God I sit here on my bed tonight and I ask what do you see in me? You’ve given me so much, and yet the flesh of this body betrays me. The scars that burn inside and out with regret and self-pity. The scars that burn as a reminder of what I’ve lost, where I’ve been, and hopefully where I’m going. Weeks like this week when the Devil’s been on the attack, wearing me down, I look to you my Lord, my Father, and I pray because I know I can’t do it on my own. The dark side of me has come bubbling up from the deep dark crevices in which it slumbers. I would go so far as to call it self pity, but days like today I feel the struggle longing for that special someone to spend time with. I know You are preparing me for something great, and I know my path is perfect for your plan, but today I feel my strength is not where I know it should be. Psalm 91:4“4 He shall cover you with His feathers, And under His wings you shall take refuge; His truth shall be your shield and [a]buckler.” I look to the sky and pray your grace be sufficient for me. 2 Corinthians 12:9“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

I sit here and write what’s on my heart, and I wonder what it is you see in me. I wonder why this message has been laid on my heart. I wonder if someone else feels the way I do tonight. I know it’s wrong, but I envy much, and I ask for forgiveness of my sin. I see so many with smiles and loved ones on their arm. I see so many posting and planning for new babies. It feels so unfair that I’ve tried so long and here I’m made to wait. It feels like you’ve gone away but I know that’s not true. I can’t see the purpose but I have faith in you, and not in my own sight. I reach to the sky and call out your name, and I ask please show me a sign.

I know that in this life we have our ups and downs, and we just have to ride the roller coaster and trust we know where you’re leading our train. This week I feel as if I were taken down back behind the woodshed and received a beating. One thing I’ve learned is you can only go so far down before the ride goes back up. And when I get a beating like this it means I’m doing something right for the glory of the Father. I can only sit and ride out the rough patch, but have faith. It’s a fool who only celebrates the good times. It’s a fool who only wants to hear ‘positive vibes’. We do not live our life in a bubble. We do not live our lives in hibernation during the rainy season of our lives. What we need to do is train our minds to see how our struggles can be turned into blessings. While this is far from easy, we are told not to worry about tomorrow. We are told in scripture to focus on today, the here and now. So, in light of what scripture tells me, I shall leave you with this short message. Go out there and feel the grass. Hug your children, kiss your significant other, and enjoy the day. Go forth today no matter what your situation is and find a few things you can be thankful for. Thank God for answered prayers, and also those that have been turned down, and those yet unanswered. Have faith, and never give up hope on our Father.

 

 

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Giving Yourself Away

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Giving Yourself Away

It starts of small, just once, just a little bit, and that’s when it takes hold. We give up one small piece of our principles, and then another, and before long the black and white becomes gray. The fall doesn’t always happen quickly, sometimes it’s a slow moving enemy that creeps along scrapping at your heart a little at a time.

We often stand on our principles determined not to give in to temptations of this fallen world. We see the fall happening all around us. We see public figures from government to Hollywood getting caught with their principles around their ankles. We see politicians accepting bribes, actors turning to drugs and more and more sex candles rock the new like never before. We have watched as our nation endures the slow fade in what is now accepted on this earth and ignoring the once proud biblical principles we once stood strong on.

We face temptations and the first time we tell ourselves ‘It’s okay, just this once.” We have taken the step into the quicksand. Sin can be described many different ways. Sometimes a major event can alter perceptions, but I like to think those circumstances are more rare. I think sin is more like boiling a frog. The water is cool when the frog is dropped in so the frog doesn’t notice anything is wrong. As the water heats (as sing grows and spreads) by the time the frog realizes anything is wrong it’s too late, the damage is done. (We find ourselves buried under the mound of sin.)

So many marriages that end due to affairs you see the near identical timelines. “It started off very innocent and we were just friends.” The slow draw of sinful lust can creep in untamed yet slowly as to not draw attention to the danger ahead. Most affairs could be snuffed out with a single choice to walk away. The little steps that make the right and wrong to an ambivalence for those their actions may affect. The truth is sin attacks at each of our hearts differently. The choices we made “there’s a price to be paid, people never crumble in a day.”(Slow Fade, Third Day)

I’ve lived with a broken heart twice as I’ve seen thoughts betray a promise made but not kept. I’ve watched the life I had crumble away. The heart was betrayed, lied to by desire, fooled by lust, and choices made destroyed so much more then a home. I’ve seen drugs take hold of people’s lives with the lies and promises that the substance make them feel better. But eventually the affects of the drugs wear off and more is needed. Then more, and before you know it you’re chasing one high to the next unable and unwilling to handle life. What seemed benign at first slowly turned to tear down the walls of everything you held most dear.

Do now allow the darkness to grab hold. Don’t allow yourself to fall victim to the thoughts that pull you away from Christ. Once down the dark path though hope is never lost, you don’t want the veiled promises. You can’t trust the lies, the whispers from the Devil. The price paid for the retched path is high. “The bill comes due, always.” (Dr. Strange) We don’t need to face those horrible consequences if we stay on the path laid out by Christ. Turn away form lies, and turn away from adultery. Stay away from hate, and don’t give into the fear. We must learn to praise God in the sun, or the rain. We must pray joy, peace, love, but if there’s a storm we must we must pray that no matter where we find ourselves we do it all for the glory of God.

God shines down from heaven today, and no matter what your situation is on this day, raise your hands to the sky, praise Jesus for the life we have. Find hope that the storm will settle, or the meadow is peaceful. Wherever the road takes you today, trust and praise Jesus. While you draw breath there is always hope. Never give up hope on God for the calm waters might be just around the river bend.

Tough Changes

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Tough Changes

Have you ever been in a situation where you dreaded to face changes? I recently experienced the need to change my cell phone case. It wasn’t allowing me to use the functions as they should have been and it became more of an inconvenience then the protection it added. I think tough changes are hard for many people to go through. Changes at your job can be tough, and stressful. Changing schools can be tough for many. Moving out of your parents house and getting your own place can be an incredibly hard change to go through. All of these things are easy or difficult depending on each individual person. While for each situation everyone’s reaction is drastically different, and while some love change, and others loath it, one of the biggest things to change is our actions.

A popular saying is “some people never change.” Another popular saying is “once a cheater, always a cheater.” While both of these are very popular, how true do you personally think these sayings are? From my personal experience I believe they are right on the money. I think the hardest thing we will ever do is change our personality to change our actions. I’ve always said humanity would never change without a major outside force. I always figured a global extinction event such as asteroid, or drought, or contagion would be the most likely just behind nuclear war. Alien invasion (less likely) could potentially bring humanity together to face a common enemy. That being said, most people do not change without something big, and life changing occurring within their life or someone very close to them. Cancer, or a near death accident has a way to change someone’s perspectives. While we often see a spiritual change in some during these times, it doesn’t always stick. The biggest change most will ever experience is the coming to the savior Jesus Christ. It’s the change in the heart that can change a man completely.

Romans 12:1-2“I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.” In the Lord we are born anew. In the Holy Spirit the soul is reborn in fire. When the Lord takes hold of our hearts, we cannot not be changed. We must push forward in the Lord and we must face that like the Phoenix, we are reborn in the burning fires of the Lord, and in our new selves we are compelled to repulse the desire of the sinful flesh. 2 Corinthians 5:17“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.”

Change isn’t always easy, and even when you begin the following of the Lord, change isn’t always easy even after choosing the Lord. In our struggles though we should turn to our siblings in Christ and ask for them to help keep us accountable and true. We grow and we sprout from seeds in Christ and grow into a wonderful flower. The beauty in this world is only limited by our own stubborn selves. We often want to stay in our struggles because we are unwilling to change our own actions. We must change our lifestyles if we are ever expecting to change our own lives. I have watched my life grow and change in my financial walk with the Lord, my spiritual walk with my God, and even how I treat my friends. While life is full of tough challenges, changing our hearts to follow the Lord, and living in love, and denouncing hate shouldn’t be so hard, but the draw of sin is strong. Keep your faith, and keep your eyes on Jesus and always strive to change yourself to better please the Lord to what we see in scripture. Never give up hope on those around you who may be stuck in sin, and who don’t treat others with respect or love. It

Light or Dark

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Light or Dark

The darkest night covers me and I need you

The sun fuels my heart and gives me warmth and strength. I need you then too.

Because of you I’m alive.

No matter where I am, or the season I’m in, my Lord I need you.

Who am I without you, I am no one.

The Lord of all knows my name.

 

The Lord who created in love not because of what I do, just because I am. I am a sinful man, but love saved me. Never because of what I’ve done, just because of what you are. No matter my of praise, or my day of prayer your grace comforts me. Today the flowers bloom, and tomorrow the ice shall come, but in all my day, and in all my ways I am yours. Because you are with me I shall not fear the night. The night was so dark without you, but your glory so bright the single ray of light when the sun peaks the horizon, the darkness breaks. Jesus Christ the pure light that would forever push the darkness away rose.

What do I have to offer the king of the universe, my heart, my everything, and yet I will never be worthy of the gift bestowed upon me. I can surrender all and even up to my life it would never cover the debt. But it is grace, and love my bill was covered by Christ. I was so loved before I was born that for me my sins and the sins of billions of others, a blood debt freely given, ransomed for my freedom of death. If my debt was paid when I’m knocked down, who then do I fight for? Christ got back up and his strength became my strength. I will get back up and continue to fight till my dying breath. I owe it to Christ to never give up and never surrender to the darkness.

God’s word has withstood the test of time, and even now as we can see the darkness covering the land, we will watch, as God’s will, will be done. Those who criticize the word and those who push to remove God’s presence from the public will one day stand in judgment. The light of the word may be pushed away but in time the raging tide will again be tamed by the Lord. God’s word will stand firm, and the darkness will be pushed back, snuffed out by the light. No matter how far we fall it’s never to late to change our course. We cannot stop praying, or hoping for God to save us. We cannot stop worshiping the Lord no matter if things are great, or if everything has been blown to a million pieces. Yesterday is gone and we don’t live there anymore. We must learn to say goodbye to the past, and live in today. The heart may have been broken yesterday, but every day we breath is a new day of growing, a new day of healing. We must tell ourselves every day that Jesus is still with us, and in his love we are healed. You cannot expect to have an answer for every tragedy that happens, and in our walk we must learn to focus on Jesus. This world is not the end, and one day the end will come on this life and the walls that kept us confined will be no more. This is not where we belong forever, and we can count on the promise made by Jesus to one day sit before the King and be accepted into the light. This life is but a fleeting speck of dust in the wind, and if we want to go home, know that this world will one day wash away.

Praise the Lord for success, and praise the Lord in failure. In every chance we get, both good and bad, fix your eyes on the one and only thing that will satisfy your heart and that’s Jesus. Life can be hard, and we are told to expect the trials that come, and the persecutions that come with following Christ, but “If you can take it, you can make it.” (Unbroken) I am a broken man, and I fail every day to live up to what God expects of me. I know I fail, and I know I fall, but I know that because of grace, and I know what true love means, I still stand here knowing God is with me. I know I have the power of the Holy Spirit with me and I’m called to be more. I’m called to push myself, and to stand toe to toe with the darkness. Every day I stand and pray to protect me from the attacks. Every day I praise my God for the blessings I have. I know I am protected and I know that for Jesus saves my soul every day. I know that every day I wake hope is here. Every day I see the hope all around me, and I know that it’ll be all right. I’ve experienced the darkness, and I’ve seen the light. I’ve felt the cold, but the warmth always triumphs. In every tear that falls God holds them. In every heart that breaks God feels our pain, and yet healing begins with Christ.

Light or dark, we decide where to stand. We can choose to stay in the darkness avoiding the light if we wish, but when it gets cold, or the demons come to creep, know the light will always accept you. You can choose to live in fear of the unknown, or you can choose to trust in Jesus and know that there is a brighter future waiting for you. You can choose to walk in the darkness, but no matter where you choose to walk, Jesus Christ is always there with you. If you choose to walk in the darkness, you have to expect to stub your toe on the furniture. Who then will you blame, God for not removing the obstacle, or yourself for not turning on the light? We as people will always learn more from hardships then a life of ease and calm rivers. If you are to be truly tested we must first be pushed to the limits to know what we are truly capable of. It’s in these times we need to turn to Christ more then ever, because we do not truly grow otherwise. We often pray for things we think are good for us, but we only see two feet ahead, but God sees a mile. We are but children clamoring around the house trying to place our finger in a light socket. God tries to warn us what not to do, but we are a stubborn people, and if we truly wish for a smoother ride we must learn to trust in the Lord and stop being so resistant to what we are told. God’s grace and love is unyielding, but our acceptance of it into our hearts is purely voluntary. Jesus loves you more then you know, and we should praise the Lord in all things, each and every day. Because our savior lives we must pray. We overcome by the power of His blood, and we are alive because he lives. Prayer is the absolute least we can do, and for the gift of life, shouldn’t we do at least that? We would be dead without Christ. Sin and shame would be all we are without the blood, and we’re alive because He lives. The light that would forever be the voice over the shadow, my life was and is held in His hands. So I pray to you Lord, thank you for my life, thank you for my pain, thank you for your love, and thank you for your gracious sacrifice for me. In your Holy Name, Amen.