If I Died

If I Died

Would you notice if I died? Would you feel bad and cry? Would you ask God why? 

We often sit back and in our hubris think we have all the time in the world. We postpone and put off yet another day of making that call, sending that text, writing that message. We think that tomorrow is guaranteed and tomorrow will be less busy than today. There was a song a while back, Friends by John Micheal Montgomery

 ” Friends

Get scattered by the wind

Tossed upon the waves

Lost for years on end

Friends

Slowly drift apart

They give away their hearts

Maybe call you

Now and then”

Isn’t this true? When we really take a good long hard look at our lives, have we really done a good job keeping up with friends? Not long ago I messaged a friend who saw my message and days later never received one back. In my opinion, and this could be just my opinion, we’ve become a society with so many distractions, so many activities, I often wonder if we spend so much time moving from one activity to another, if we’ve forgotten to truly live. 

Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 NKJV

9 Two are better than one,

Because they have a good reward for their labor.

10 For if they fall, one will lift up his companion.

But woe to him who is alone when he falls,

For he has no one to help him up.

11 Again, if two lie down together, they will keep warm;

But how can one be warm alone?

12 Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him.

And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.

While scripture says clearly the benefit of having a friend, it also cautions to having too many, 

Proverbs 18:24 A man who has friends must himself be friendly,

But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.

While this message is twofold, the first part speaks of having to rise to the call of being a friend. Too many friends can leave us in ruin, but to those whom we dabaq (Cleave) unto as a friend, can become closer than kin. Jesus is this friend to us, and knowing how Christ clings to us, is always there for us, are we showing the same respect for those in our own lives? 

Scripture is clear on multiple occasions how we must treat every day. James 4:14 “14 whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.” Life is such a fleeting thing, and with every passing year, our society gets more and more fast paced. We have opportunities to slow down, and in the heart of the Covid-19 spread, while everything was shut down, I fear we did not heed our lesson, but instead doubled down on our foolishness, our careless ways, and now, we see brother turn against brother as blood spills in the streets. It’s interesting that in 1967 a small group named Buffalo Springfield released a song called For What It’s Worth. 

There’s somethin’ happenin’ here
But what it is ain’t exactly clear
There’s a man with a gun over there
A-tellin’ me I got to beware

I think it’s time we stop
Children, what’s that sound?
Everybody look what’s going down

There’s battle lines being drawn
And nobody’s right if everybody’s wrong
Young people speakin’ their minds
A-gettin’ so much resistance from behind

I think it’s time we stop
Hey, what’s that sound?
Everybody look what’s going down

What a field day for the heat (ooh-ooh-ooh)
A thousand people in the street (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Singin’ songs and a-carryin’ signs (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Mostly say “Hooray for our side” (ooh-ooh-ooh)

It’s time we stop
Hey, what’s that sound?
Everybody look what’s going down

Paranoia strikes deep
Into your life it will creep
It starts when you’re always afraid
You step out of line
The man come and take you away

We better stop, hey, what’s that sound?
Everybody look what’s going down

Stop, hey, what’s that sound?
Everybody look what’s going down (we better)

Stop, now, what’s that sound?
Everybody look what’s going down (we better)

Stop, children, what’s that sound?
Everybody look what’s going down

We have come to a point when we have turned on our brothers and sisters, and we set aside all rational thought, and now the other side is the enemy. With a world so violent, so turbulent, would the world miss me if I was gone? It seems history is indeed repeating itself. A world so quick to judge, so quick to determine truth while the media fans the flames of the great divide. With such division in the streets, we have failed to number our days, failed to grow in a heart of wisdom (Psalm 90:12). Christ tells us not to worry about tomorrow, thus telling us to be in the now, focus on today, be in the present. This also tells us not to let ourselves be weighed down in stress, but to give God our worries and concerns. 

When we are on our death bed, will we be looking at our loved ones and say “I wish we had time for one more errand. I wish we had time for one more school event. One more work meeting. One more _______” You fill in the blank. We are blessed in our lives to have a few people who would truly be there for us, who would give us what we need, when we need it. Are we living up to our end of being a good friend? How are we treating those who have treated us with respect and kindness throughout the years? Again, I ask, where do we place our focus? This is of course just food for thought. If 2020 has taught us anything, it should be tomorrow is never promised, so we must live for today, and make the very best of the blessings we are given day by day. Would you miss me when I’m gone, would you know it right away, or would it take you months before you found out? Something to ponder. As a whole I don’t think we are doing a very good job at being friends to one another. I don’t believe we are there when people need us. I don’t believe we give our friends even the courtesy of a reply let alone an ear to listen. Maybe I’m wrong, but wherever you fit on the spectrum, I hope we can come together and be better friends to one another. 

Driving Force

Driving Force

What pushes you? Do you have a motivation to push yourself because of a desire to be the best? Do you push yourself to provide for others? Do you do it out of greed, or a need to make the world a better place? We all have our dreams, but how do those dreams affect those around us? We want what we want, but at what cost? The life I’ve lived I have learned to weigh the good of the mission, verses the good of what’s truly important.

Driving Force 1

In our life we may only get a few chances to finally and fully meet our better half. How often does life get in the way, and divide the home. All I ever wanted in my life was to be remembered for something great. I wanted to make a difference and to leave a legacy for my children to have. I wanted to have a bunch of kids and in that hope and that dream my soul purpose was to make a happy home. All I wanted to do was come runnin’ home to the woman I loved. I tried every day to be a good man, a good husband, a good Christian. The days that unfold in front of us don’t always play by the rules, and we aren’t always given the fair shot.

See, the thing is, for some people the hard work that gains them notoriety, the success and happiness in life, comes with a measure of ease that’s not often true for everyone. No matter the hard work, sometimes things just go badly. What can a man do when he marries a girl, lives a good life, and looses her? When he picks up the pieces and starts over, meeting a new girl, spending more time together, getting married, and when you feel like you’ve got the keys to the city, so many blessings, what can you do when it explodes in your face? The explosion sends shrapnel through your body and you feel like your insides are oozing out onto the ground. How do you triage the worst of the worst and bandage yourself up? There’s something inside us all that forces us to pick ourselves up, and even if we limp on, we still move. For every one of us that driving force is different.

Driving Force 3

For me, it was God. God spoke to me, and although the words were about forgiveness the act itself was very clear. Go and make disciples. Go and expand the flock, spread the Gospel and fight the good fight. With the hardships of Job, and the mission of Paul, who said this life would be easy? The thing that most people miss when they say they are alone, and although they may be in this world, God is always with them. God is with us when we are broken, and if God spoke to all of us, I’m sure He’d say we are “Broken Together” How many of us wish in adulthood we could go back to simpler times. I myself have been thinking a lot about my time in high school and how simple it was. Do the homework, go to the club meetings, and try to keep up with friends. Friends, seems that concept gets lost as time moves us along. As friends get scattered by the wind it’s harder and harder to keep track of where they go, or rather, they stop keeping track of you. I have stumbled and I’ve fallen, and now I’m at the precipice of my life changing forever and I can’t hear what I’m supposed to do. I’ve tried to quiet my mind and listen, but the storm’s so loud I can’t hear. I’ve doubted myself, I’ve doubted my resolve and now that the time is upon me, I don’t know if I’m making the right choice. The prayers I’m sure are being heard, but I suppose at some point I have to just take the leap, plunge into the darkness and pray that the light of the Lord will shine brightly if nothing else through me. I know that no matter where I am the Lord is with me, and no matter how bad it gets, no matter how bad I feel, no matter the despair I’m in, God is always with me.

Driving Force 4

Knowing the knife is no longer there it feels as fresh as the day it plunged into my heart. I recently received a small set of cheap throwing knives. I figured I’d expand my list of talents in the hopes of adding more useless bullets to my growing list of useless talents. Knife throwing doesn’t exactly win you prizes with the ladies fathers, and it certainly doesn’t give you a good bullet for a resume. While I wasn’t expecting to be great, I wasn’t expecting to be horrible either. Boy was I wrong. I threw the knife twice, missed the box the first time (my aim sucked) and then threw a second time, and I’m pretty sure I hit the box with the handle side of the knife. For the record I watched an 8 minute video on knife throwing, and I was pretty sure I had a good handle on it, no pun intended. Sadly it started to rain and as I was throwing into a cardboard box, I decided to call it quits. I cleaned off the knife and placed it back in its sheath. While I was sitting here on the couch pondering the nature of this blog, it occurred to me that life is a lot like that experience. I failed my first two tries, but that doesn’t mean I will never get it. Sure the first video isn’t appealing, but neither was the first time I picked up my recurve bow, the arrow completely missed the target bag. You have to keep trying and practicing to be good at something isn’t life the same way? We can’t be expected to get life right all the time. We stumble, we fall, we crash, we love, we loose, and through it all, the only thing we can do is sleep, and wake up the next day and try again. Anything is possible if we only believe, and we have to have the faith in God that anything can be remade. Anything in our life can be fixed, and we can if we have the blessings from God to do so.

Broken Together by Casting Crowns

How I wish we could go back to simpler times
Before all our scars and all our secrets were in the light
Now on this hallowed ground, we’ve drawn the battle lines
Will we make it through the night?

It’s going to take much more than promises this time
Only God can change our minds

Maybe you and I were never meant to be complete
Could we just be broken together
If you can bring your shattered dreams and I’ll bring mine
Could healing still be spoken and save us
The only way we’ll last forever is broken together

 I was told recently we could never go back to the way things were. While that’s true, fixing what’s broken isn’t impossible. Though the broken, or shattered lives of the past may never be put back together, all we can do is focus on how we can pick ourselves up. See that’s what the driving force is all about isn’t it? What drives you to get back up when you’ve been knocked down? Why do you get up time and again, why do you stay in the fight? I think it’s important for all of us to review those traits inside each and every one of us. We must know what we fight for, what we want, what our personal code is, and live by it. My code aligns with Gods word the truth. I fight for justice; I fight for truth because truth is sometimes all we have in this world. I don’t like bullies and I stand firm against them even at the cost of myself. I pick myself up because I don’t like the idea of being seen as weak. I don’t like the idea of being deemed a failure. This last year I’ve fought to redeem myself. I fell hard last year, and I lost what I felt was my entire credibility. I felt as if my actions would be the doom of my life forever. While this may or may not be the actual case, some of the facts are undeniable.

Remember though, it’s okay to fall, and it’s okay to get knocked down. The Devil will try to keep you there, and what you need to do is listen to the voice of truth.

Voice of Truth by Casting Crowns

But the waves are calling out my name
And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times
I’ve tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
Time and time again. “Boy, you’ll never win!”
“You’ll never win!”

But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, “Do not be afraid!”
The voice of truth says, “This is for My glory”
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

 Don’t listen to the lies, the half-truths, or the feelings of worthlessness the Devil tries to tell you. You know you were perfectly made, and that is what’s important. You need to get back up because even if you’re broken, God uses broken people the most. You may be broken, but you can change the world even when you don’t know how to fix yourself. There’s a song that the Angels sing, and they sing for you. You can be the redeemed and through Christ made new. What drives you? Jesus, Jesus drives me to get back up and to always try to be better. You may not be good at everything, but there’s something you can do and be the best at. Find it, use it, and glorify God with it. Be the best at something, and if you’re going to take a beating in this life at least do it for God. Stand up, and look the Devil straight in the eyes and say, “I can do this all day!” (Captain America)