Rediscover

Rediscover

The song plays in the distance, Moon River by Melissa Benoist. I have a dream to cross over the rainbow to find my Oz. A journey of discovery to find who I’m meant to be, I walk a path that seems black and white and without color we aren’t truly alive. Over the rainbow lies a land of magic, of color, of wonders beyond our wildest imagination. How do I get there I wonder, how do I take the step, then the leap to see if I can fly? I find myself scared to do what is necessary. I struggle to think about what if I’m making a huge mistake? The butterfly’s in my stomach doing summersaults, and as I watch a part of my life close, I wonder how did all this happens, I’m left with no answers. Life was good, moving forward, and I liked where I was. It’s so difficult closing a book when it’s over. A book that caught you, that grabbed every bit of your essence, and knowing that it’s done, it’s hard to grasp the finality of what’s come to pass. It’s clear now, that where I’m meant to is not where I thought I’d be. My life changed in an instant and in a year I found myself fighting a duality. I feel as if I’ve been split into two people and I barely recognize either of them. The man I see in the mirror I don’t recognize. The family that never would be, the career that ended before it flew, the awards that now gather dust in a box, all for nothing.

I know I never followed the typical path, but now I question why. What is it about me that so much bad have happened in a single lifetime? I look down at the cross I wear on my finger. The words of the armor are the reminder to remain strong and to fight the urge to crumble. I take a deep breath and close my eyes, and the urge to cry comes. I don’t know what’s waitin’ round the bend for me, and I don’t know if I have a friend waiting for me. I feel like I’m falling apart. My resolve seems to be shaken, and now I question everything. Of course when the going gets tough the answers are found in only two places. 1. Scripture, 2. Godly counsel.

Deuteronomy 31:6 “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”

 My Lord, you must think I’m strong because I feel like the weight of the world is crushing me. Where is the light at the end of these hard times? Where’s the grace when the world isn’t fair? Where’s the faith I need to stand strong in the raging storm?

Rediscover 3Looking back at the person I once was I liked who I was back then. I look back and see the strength to take on the world, to overcome anything that came, and I was. I was a happier person, I was full of joy, and life. Today I feel so removed from then. I feel like the scars have built up and now I don’t see who I was any longer. I survived a war and through that I felt more me then I do now. The suffering from combat left me looking at the person in the mirror and I saw someone new. Now I look into the mirror and I see so little of my old self-looking back. It looks like me, but broken, fogged over through the steam that covers the glass. I wipe away the dew on the glass and I see the mask looking back at me.

God, I am broken today. I feel lost and I feel broken. My God I ask for healing today, and could healing happen today? My Lord on high you’ve watched me fall, you’ve seen me cry, you’ve seen me bleed, so I ask you on this day, to stand here with me broken together. Help pick me up and guide me along the right path. I don’t know which way’s up, or which ways down, I’m lost at sea with no stars to guide me. My fairy tale has broken down and like Humpdy Dumpdy I thought maybe I couldn’t be put back together again. Today I fall to my knees and I pray and pray, and I know that there’s only one hope for me, God’s love and God’s healing grace. I know that in this trial I’ve been tested. As many have before I me, I lean upon the words of prophesy.

Revelation 2:10 “Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and for ten days you will have tribulation. Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life.” God you’ve never left my side even in the storm, even as I faced death, you carried me back on wings of grace. You saved me for a purpose and even when I don’t know what that is, you do. You have given me a second chance to praise you in the storm, and no matter the waves that pound against me I won’t back down, I won’t stop fighting. My God my God, you have seen me through the war, you have seen me loose it all, you’ve seen me stumble, you’ve seen me fall, but today as I cry and feel like I can’t go on, I feel the strength come from above. As I sit and write I cry and the moment I start my dog lays her head in my lap. You use her to remind me you’re still there.

I am reminded that I need you Lord because the worlds to big. I stop and I listen, I quite my mind, and I reach down deep to hear your voice again. It’s with me always but sometimes I forget. Lord you cover me with the grace of your Angels, you protect me from harm, and you lift my soul. You rescue me from the Devil’s snare and one day you will call me home. While today is not that day, and nor was it yesterday or the times before, you have watched over me.

While I sit and seek tomorrow I pray the rainbow is bright. I see my wonderland and through the keyhole I ask if I seek, someday will I find, someone to watch over me. The future is a question we can’t be afraid of. We must grab life by the horns and must learn to leap so we may fly. While I’m not sure where I’m going, or what I’m doing, I know that I must take the leap of faith, and I know this journey will be one for me to rediscover who I am. Often when a chapter ends, or even the book the next phase is to relearn, rediscover who you are, or who you’re meant to be.

Rediscover 2

I Can Go The Distance

I have often dreamed of a far off place
Where a hero’s welcome would be waiting for me
Where the crowds would cheer, when they see my face
And a voice keeps saying this is where I’m meant to be

I’ll be there someday, I can go the distance
I will find my way if I can be strong
I know every mile would be worth my while
When I go the distance, I’ll be right where I belong

As I keep going in this life, I know I will one day find that welcome. I remain on the path, and one day I will finish the song.

I will search the world, I will face its harms
‘Till I find my hero’s welcome waiting in your arms

 

 

 

 

The Armor

The Armor

Ephesians 6:10-18 The Whole Armor of God 10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might. 11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand firm. 14 Stand therefore, having fastened on the belt of truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15 and, as shoes for your feet, having put on the readiness given by the gospel of peace. 16 In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;17 and take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God, 18 praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication. To that end, keep alert with all perseverance, making supplication for all the saints,”

 As I have considered all things in my life as of late, I find myself struggling to find inspiration. Not surprising since my day revolves around my favorite show (Arrow), my only Xbox one game (Destiny) and loving on my puppies. With very little worldly influence I’ve struggled to maintain my daily post. The only days I have not been able to post are a few in which I was nowhere near Internet service for reasons far beyond my control. Today I received a trinket I got in the mail, something I have chosen to add to my collection of things to keep with me to remind me of what I need in my life on a daily basis. Most devout Christians can give you their favorite verse if not by heart, then by verse number. With everything I’ve gone through in my life there’s not doubt or question why The Armor is by far my verse of choice. The soldier in me, the warrior heart, the battles I’ve had to fight and endure, the Armor reminds me every day that life is a cold and often an unforgiving, dark and desolate place. Not saying there’s isn’t hope and love within the fallen world, but this message is about that war, the war that wages on every single day, and the one single piece of hope we have, Jesus Christ. “Living is not for the weak.” (Arrow) The Armor 1

Although it may sound on the surface my position is one of pessimism, and it may sound like I don’t have faith, believe me, the truth is it’s because of my faith, it’s because of my worldly experiences I know this isn’t anything but the absolute truth. When you look around, when you watch the news, listen to how people talk to one another in the grocery store, the proof is abundant and incontrovertible. The Devil has woven his lies in nearly every aspect of our lives. What we watch on TV, the music we listen to, the teaching in school, the laws we pass, every bit of our life now has influence of Lucifer himself. We are told by Jesus himself that John 16:33 “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” With that promise we are also promised eternal salvation. Psalm 23:1-4 “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. 3 He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. 4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” How do we make it to the Kingdom? How do we manage through our daily lives? The answer is both simple, yet some days the hardest thing you’ll have to endure. The Armor.

The Helmet of Salvation: This Roman piece that Paul writes about is the protection of our mind. The Devil whispers in our ears and tries to get us to actively sin. The Devil tries to get us to question God, to make decisions that make us feel good, but like many drugs that sensation of feel good is only an illusion. It’s important to remember the thoughts we have, the decisions we make must be driven and guided by God. We must not conform to the standards of the world, because the world is a fallen place filled with hate, anger, lust, and is all about self. Resist by keeping your mind on the Lord, take the Helmet and keep it strapped on tight to resist the temptations put in front of you every day.

Belt Of Truth: This is the first piece mentioned in the Gospel of Paul. This is because of what truth he’s referring too. The Truth of God, the truth of Jesus Christ is above all the most important. If Christ weren’t the truth, the way, the path to Heaven, nothing else would matter. The Belt holds the sword but also holds back the cloak in preparation for battle.

The Breastplate of Righteousness: This item protects the trunk of a soldier. This protects all the vital organs and more importantly the heart. The Armor is a thick piece of leather given to every follower of Christ. This protects the Christian from the lies and deceits aimed at the heart and soul of the Christian. The breastplate protects the heart, which is the center of the emotions. Love, and hate, empathy verses revenge, these are the feelings targeted by the Devil. Satan wants to harden our hearts; He wants us to have a stance of hatred and anger, a bitterness that if we aren’t careful can spread like a cancer once it takes root in our hearts. If our heart is infected we could in fact loose a great deal of ourselves.

Shoes of the Gospel of Peace: In the day’s Paul wrote the letter to Ephesus, the Roman soldiers wore spiked sandals. These sandals where designed to dig in when the enemy tried to force them back. When the winds of the storm are strong and when they would blow down almost any man, digging in and holding your ground makes you a Soldier for Christ.

Shield of Faith: In the days of the Roman Empire this soldier would often carry a shield, and this shield was large enough to completely hide behind. This shield would protect one soldier from incoming arrows, and attacks by swords and other weapons. When wet these shields would extinguish flaming arrows. Together a group of warriors with these shields could come together and be completely enclosed in a barrier. Our shield is strong when our faith is strong, but that faith is stronger when other warriors for Christ join us. Hold onto that shield and use it to withstand all the attacks and flaming arrows from the Devil.

Sword of the Spirit: The sword is the word of God. A sword is both a weapon for attack and defense. In all times of attack offensively, or the defensive, we must train with our weapon. Training with a sword takes time, dedication, and patience. We must learn the word and use it effectively to battle the satanic attacks Christians are under daily.

2 Corinthians 10:4-5 For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ,” We obviously don’t wear armor every day, but what we do have is a spiritual armor, a spiritual war that’s being fought every day and every day we must remain on the alert to the spiritual attacks.

In all things we do in this world we are faced with choices, some days we are left with impossible decisions to make. We are always going to face battles; we are always going to be warriors as long as we follow Christ. We know that most of our struggles will be of a spiritual nature. We know that what’s in peoples hearts and minds is either a force for good or evil, and we know the source of that good and evil is God or Satan. Knowing the armor and how to wear it, training by being in the word day in and day out is the only effective way to be a good soldier. Every good soldier knows to do PMCS Preventative, Maintenance, Checks and Services. Soldiers will check their equipment, clean their weapons, sharpen their knives, and be ready for combat at a moments notice. We must read, and understand scripture, know the enemy and how He works. We must know how to defend and fight back against the evil schemes that will come our way.

As I have posted in the past, I find it just as relevant today as it was then, a saying that’s on a shirt I recently got. “The Devil whispered in my ear you’re not strong enough to withstand the storm.” Today I whispered in the Devil’s ear “I AM THE STORM.” Are you strong enough in faith to withstand the storm that will, not might come your way? Be ready because as this world continues to fall, you don’t want to be caught unawares. As the military slogan goes, ‘Fit to fight’.

 

Love Unconditional

Love Unconditional

I’ve been putting a lot of thought into the word love. What does it mean to love something? When we think of love we think of our parents, siblings, closest friends, but we also think of our favorite show, our favorite food, our favorite pass time activity. The truth is in our society today the word just gets tossed around flippantly. The truth is, I think love is something that when we loose the object of our affection it breaks us apart inside. When we are dating in school we often throw the word around love and sure I don’t want to downplay those emotions, but the proof is in the pudding, often times that’s just puppy love and something we get over pretty quick once it’s gone. True love however is something a little more difficult to come by. The Bible has a pretty air tight description of love, and when we look at our lives, and we compare it to this, the comparisons are often going to leave you realizing, maybe it’s not love after all. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 “4 Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 5 Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; 6 Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 7 Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. 8 Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.” Now I know what you’re thinking, yes I am talking about love, and yes so is 1 Corinthians. “Charity is the epitome of perfection in the Christian life. It is the “greatest” of the three abiding virtues” (http://www.learnthebible.org/charity-or-love.html) If we look at the definition of love, and compare it to what we say to others, are we actually in line with scripture, or just a word we use because we don’t know anything better to say?

Lets make it easier to understand a little. When you look at 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;[a] it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.” How often in our own lives do we drudge up mistakes our partner made 2 years ago? How often do we hold a grudge, and for how long? How often do we love but only so long as we are worldly happy? There is so much in our lives today that draw us away from love. So much today that we don’t understand, but if we go to Scripture, if we study, we can finally unravel the strongest of lies, and the strongest of truths. John 15:13 13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” Jesus, Jesus laid down His perfect life as a perfect blemish less, sinless man that chose to be tortured, ridiculed, and murdered for us, for every single last one of us that in no way by our daily actions deserve such grace and mercy. The truth is, that’s LOVE. When we think about that kind of love, makes what we say about love look silly. How often do we see now in our world today divorce is a cancer on our society, and it runs unchecked destroying homes left and right. We see marriage as expendable, as an option that so long it benefits me, so long as I am getting something out of it, I’ll stay married. THE QUESTION I ASK TO EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU, WHAT ARE YOU GIVING IN YOUR MARRIAGE? If we look a little deeper we see what the definition of love is, we see what is says in John, but what about husbands and wives? Ephesians 5:25 “25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,” Yes that means you are supposed to love your wives so much that you sacrifice unconditionally to her. You sacrifice yourself to give her everything she needs. Note I said need, not want. The difference between need and want is an entirely separate blog.

Husbands, need to sacrifice worldly things, worldly desires, worldly distractions for his wife. Ephesians 5:22-24 “22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.” Many people look at this section of scripture and scoff, and I really question why that is. I get the feminist movement, and women can do anything a man can do and all that stuff, and that’s great, but the truth is, women and men aren’t the same. We are wired differently in the brains, we have different strengths and weaknesses, and this isn’t talking about slavery this is talking about letting go of ones worldly self. Letting go of the fleshy desires, and allowing yourself to be completely taken in by your husband. As the husband loves the wife as he died for us, so shall the husband die for his wife. Think about this, when we get married, we often think of it as the old ball in chain, the tying of the knot, the end or death of an era. Well, in some parts yes, that’s exactly what it is. But if we look at death as a bad thing, a negative thing, sure we will be going into that marriage under negative premise and then that’s where the problems start to set in. Death is a glorious thing, a wonderful thing, because as a Christian we believe that death of us is the gateway to an eternal life of perfection and love. If we are to truly love our wives, love our husbands we must allow the old part of us to die off. Think of love and marriage like a butterfly. The caterpillar is you before you get married. The marriage is the cocoon. When you emerge married that fuzzy old caterpillar is gone, fundamentally changed into a beautiful creature no longer bound to crawl around, but to soar, to fly, to be a wonder of nature.

How wonderful it would be if we actually saw marriage that way. How wonderful it would be if we as a people were able to see ourselves and combining our selves into one body and actually selflessly giving up our selves and wanting only to please our partner. To those who are struggling in your marriages, I offer this, in all things God can heal, and with work, and saying it a hundred times, a thousand times, I forgive you, forgive the wrongs your partner has done. Remember the way you felt the day you got married and realize if both of you, if both the Husband and the Wife learn to forgive, learn to accept, learn to change because marriage is a fundamental change. You are no longer you, you become y’all. When we loose sight of the togetherness, the us in the marriage and we start to focus on the me, start to focus on the what does Arrow Preacher want, we loose sight of the (what) can I do for my spouse? What can I do to bring happiness to my beloved today? Human greed is one of the strongest sins to pull us back into the world, but two are stronger then one. Pouring of sand of two different colors into a jar that sand can never be completely separated. There’s reason sand if often used in marriage ceremonies. It’s a constant visual reminder that once together, you shall never break apart, bonded into one entity, one jar, and as rope is stronger when woven together, so shall you be stronger when you come to realize the true definition of love, the true understanding of what Scripture is talking about, and let go of your worldly sins, those desires that draw you away from your spouse. The Devil wants to break up marriage because he’s been doing it since the beginning. Marriage was the plan, for man to not be alone, and he knows that separated the divide and concur makes for an easier target. Don’t take the bait. Don’t allow Satan to ruin your union. Fight back, and fight for each other.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Regret

Regret

In our lives we make decisions that in hindsight weren’t so good. We also make great decisions that can change our lives forever. It’s the one moment where life has fallen apart around you, the moment you can’t see the next breath you take, you can’t take a single step forward, life has stopped and the world looks like it’s moving around you at near light speed. The moment when all hope is lost, and the decision you make seems like the right one, but what if there was a way to move that step forward, what if I told you there was hope, and there is a next breath, would that change your mind for the next catastrophe in your life?

For many veterans and civilians who’ve gone through trauma getting stuck in that moment is all too common. When we get stuck we go through our days only a shell of who we used to be. We eat, we work, we sleep, we may even contribute to the life around us, but we aren’t really there. The sludge of the weight of what we carry builds as we trek through the mud farther and farther. There will come a point when you have the black tar from your shoes up to your neck. At some point you won’t be able to move forward anymore. No matter what our event is, whether it’s the death of a loved one, the loss of a spouse, sexual assault, horrific car accident, fire, or even just a series of events that you have entered that hurts those around you. We often push away people we love because we don’t want them to see us in pain, we don’t want them to see us suffering. We push away to defend ourselves, and them, from potential damage. We don’t want to drag anyone down with us, and sometimes it’s because we just can’t see beyond our own pain.

Being pushed away by someone who’s going through a lot of pain is hard. Knowing you want to help, and feeling powerless is perhaps the most difficult position to ever be in. Seeing someone you care about in pain, seeing them walk down a dark path, and when all you want to do is take their pain away and shower them in love, yet you’re held away, and pushed and kicked out of their life, is heart breaking.

For each of our mistakes we see the other side of other peoples. When we know they are making a mistake all we can do is pray for them. All we can do is hope that one day they will turn around from the path they’re on and hopefully do so before anything to bad happens they can’t come back from. For me I gravitated to the song One Step Away by Casting Crowns:

 What if you could go back and relive one day of your life all over again
And unmake the mistake that left you a million miles away
From the you, you once knew
Now yesterday’s shame keeps saying that you’ll never get back on track
But what if I told you

You’re one step away from surrender
One step away from coming home, coming home
One step from arms wide open
His love has never let you go
You’re not alone
You’re one step away

It doesn’t matter how far you’ve gone
Mercy says you don’t have to keep running down the road you’re on
Love’s never met a lost cause
Your shame, lay it down
Leave your ghosts in the past ‘cause you know that you can’t go back
But you can turn around
You’ve never been more than

 We aren’t ever alone. This message goes out to my veteran brothers and sisters, we aren’t ever alone. We sit at home, we have the open bottle of beer or booze, and we seclude ourselves in the dark, thoughts screaming in our head. We can’t seem to get out of the way. This, is, torture. When we trained for war we trained as a team. When we get home we see that no one is there for us, no one understands, how could anyone, they weren’t there. The thing is, that’s all an elaborate lie by the Devil to separate us from the world, and break us down. It’s not true. There are plenty of other veterans out there struggling with their own replay of war. Something else I’ve learned is trauma is trauma no matter what kind. Sexual assault, loss of loved ones, fire, car accidents, none of that is exclusive to military. Sure firefights may be a bit more segregated, but that doesn’t mean people aren’t there for you. We have support groups, veterans groups, outreach programs, and so much more to help get us all back to a good healthy place.

We all have our regrets in life but one of the biggest battles we will ever face is facing those mistakes. Allowing ourselves to heal from them on the inside by forgiving ourselves, asking others to forgive us and showing true repentance for those mistakes. Philippians 3:13 “Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but [this] one thing [I do], forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before,” We must go forth to God and ask for forgiveness, but we also need to make it right, we need to attempt to right our wrongs. 1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us [our] sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” One thing that I am reminded of is how easy it is to get off track. How often do we do a wrong based on how someone else wrongs us? We as Christians should hold ourselves to a higher standard, and not fall into the world expectations. We cannot allow the world to dictate how we react, or how we treat others. We mustn’t let the world tell us the lies we often feel when dealing with life’s tragedies. Isaiah 43:18-19 “18 Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old. 19 Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, [and] rivers in the desert.” We cannot know what our tomorrow brings, and we cannot know what surprises will be waiting for us just around the next bend in the road.

In all things in our life we should move forward with kindness in our hearts, forgiveness isn’t something to be earned, it’s something to be given freely. We can’t hold our forgiveness hostage like some kind of ransom is required to give it. If we are to live like Christ we must learn that people are sinful, people hurt others, we hurt them, and forgiveness isn’t always rebuilding the relationship if it’s lost. Christ forgave humanity for our sins despite the awful things we as a collective whole did to Him. We were not only forgiven for past and current sins, but future sins we might face in the future. 2 Corinthians 7:10 “10 For godly sorrow worketh repentance to salvation not to be repented of: but the sorrow of the world worketh death.” When Judas betrayed Christ he could not get past his own grief and he took his own life by hanging. This is worldly sorrow. There is not repentance to be had, and no chance of redemption. We all Sin, we have make mistakes big and small. Even David a man of God’s own heart was not free from them. David was well known to be a fair man as a King, but he was a horrible husband and father. Psalm 51:1- 3 “51 Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions. 2 Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin. 3 For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.”

 No matter how far we’ve fallen, there is always a way back. Even when it’s adulatory or other forms of betrayal. Proverbs 6:32-34 “He who commits adultery lacks sense; he who does it destroys himself. He will get wounds and dishonor, and his disgrace will not be wiped away. For jealousy makes a man furious, and he will not spare when he takes revenge.” A man shall not take revenge for himself, for revenge is not bringing harmony. Justice is for the Lord. Forgiveness is for man, asking for it, and giving it freely. Do not allow your life to come to the end and regret a multitude of things. Make right your wrongs, make right the harm you’ve cause, the pain you’ve inflicted. Seek forgiveness in others, beg for forgiveness of the Lord. Let go of your own pain, and do not carry that weight with you. If you continue to carry a weight like that around you cannot continue to God’s work when you have so much on your shoulders already. Allow God’s grace to fill you, let yourself see through God’s eyes, let yourself feel with God’s heart, and learn to let go of judgments, let go of your own sorrow. Do not allow yourself to be weighed down any longer.

We all have things in our life we wish we could take back, things we could change. We can’t ever retrieve something we’ve let slip from out mouths, undo an action, but we can attempt to make right what we’ve done. Don’t wait for tomorrow, start healing today. Let the weight of the world fall from your shoulders, and find a new way, a better way, a Godly way of dealing with life, and facing the trials ahead of you. Our way is never the way even if it’s easier sometimes the easy way isn’t the right way, sometimes the right way is the path less traveled. It’s our job as Christians to figure out the path God wants us to be on. When we don’t know the path to take we must turn to the scripture and pray about our path. Proverbs 18:13 13 He that answereth a matter before he heareth it, it is folly and shame unto him.” Don’t make a decision without knowing as much of the facts as possible so be sure to not make foolish decisions. Don’t allow yourself to be fooled by fake or false information. Proverbs 18:15 “15 The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge; and the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge.” When you think you know something, don’t be quick to pass judgement without gaining other perspectives and complete the story. Don’t take a story as true just on face value. Proverbs 18:15 15 The heart of the prudent getteth knowledge; and the ear of the wise seeketh knowledge.”

Knowing what to expect when problems comes up is one thing. Knowing how to respond is the second side of that coin. We must know that in our lives we will face problems, we will face trials, and in all of those trials we know that we must accept and rejoice in those times. James 1:2-4 My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.” If anyone out there is like me the WHY ME question comes up sometimes. We know that patience is something we all need more of, and in our trials we are often tasked with growing in our faith, draw closer to God and growing in patience. IF we learn how to respond to issues, we could very well have fewer regrets in our life. John 16:33“These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” When standing on the beach of the ocean we do not stand with our backs to the waves (generally) because when the big one hits us we get knocked own. Instead we face the wave head on, and we brace for it. Knowing what Christ expects of us on how to handle our troubles, knowing how to handle heartbreak, and betrayals, we can minimize the damage and we can help prevent us from getting into as much trouble.

We won’t always make all the right choices all the time, we won’t always handle every situation the best we can, we are human, we are driven by sin nature, and thus we will undoubtedly make mistakes. It’s in those mistakes however we know how to seek forgiveness, and seek repentance when they do occur. It’s in those mistakes, those hardships that our true character is placed on display. We find out more about ourselves through our trials then when things are always a batch of roses. Just remember that even the prettiest of roses have thorns. Seek God for the answers to your troubles, and seek God to the direction of your path. You may not be able to get rid of regret, but you can minimize its impact.

 

 

Walking Judgments

Walking Judgments 7-2-17

As I walk through my building with mud from my boots to my knees I am filled with so many negative judgments of myself. I get the impression the people in the building are staring at me. I imagine what they are thinking, and envision the thoughts of disgust and jokes. I felt insecure and embarrassed by my appearance. The more I walked through the building a second judgment started to creep into my mind. No one noticed, I think to myself. Was that true? Had no one noticed in 7 floors did no one notice my dreadful appearance? Then I try to imagine which one was worse, that fact those who did probably passed negative judgments, or that I am so insignificant at my job that no one would notice at all.

Bad judgments all around swirl in an out of thought with little regard of a purpose. It’s hard going through life always casting judgments around like a snow blizzard falling to the ground. We try and try to squish the uprising before they reach the surface, but always too little too late.

Checking The Facts:

 

  1. I was involved with the rescue of a man who was ejected from his vehicle.
  2. Without going home I was already doing to be 20 minutes late for work
  3. I did a good thing by stopping and helping.
  4. Negative judgments happen and we can’t always change that.

It’s hard to face when we think those thoughts and feelings control our day. The truth is, we often give away so much power to others, and we keep very little for ourselves. The pain we hold onto deep inside is often the reason we give up so much, and allow so much negativity to infect or infest our lives.

Are our biggest self-judgments linked to our biggest fear? I believe the answer is yes. For example my biggest fear is abandonment. When I am dating someone I feel I will not be good enough and they will leave. When I’m working I fear I won’t be good enough at my job, or not be needed at my position. The truth is when it comes to both the judgments of others shouldn’t affect me as much as they do. We obviously know the old saying “sticks and stones my break my bones but names will never hurt me.” We know that’s a crock of crap. We know that words do hurt because were human, and we have feelings. We know that bullying does hurt us, that someone we love when they say cruel things often cut the deepest. The key to overcoming that is repetitive action of telling yourself Jesus loves you, and the judgment of God is the most important thing. We cannot live our lives listening to the lies were told by the world.

Today’s society is obsessed by looks, everything on TV is about looking right, makeup, fashion, and as always TV shows must have the most attractive people on the planet. We watch this worldview all around us and it sinks in and when we look in the mirror we don’t see that perfect image. I myself have struggled with my limitations and even recently as I’ve tried to get back into the dating world, I see myself as a failure. It’s a tough pill to swallow and when it seems there’s so much against you it’s hard not to pass judgments upon yourself. I’m not very good at this myself; I’m not good at keeping a positive attitude about myself. I often think negative thoughts about my looks, my voice, my life, and I often think of myself as a failure in my love life and even my professional life. To top it off as more and more of my close friends are becoming parents I look at my own life and as 7 years with my ex wife came to a close and realizing I still don’t have the family I’ve always prayed for, the children I’ve always wanted, I judged myself to be a failure and I truly felt it deep down into my heart. I realize this isn’t Gods plan for me, and I realize the little voice feeding me the negative emotions, the harmful thoughts are Satan whispering in my ear, and it’s incredibly difficult to ignore.

As I confess my deepest fears, my deepest failings, I don’t do so to gather sympathy, but the opposite, to spread hope. As I have been faced with so much in the last year, and throughout my life, I know that God is still on my side, I know that all these years of pain God’s been there in the trenches with me. “I’ve paid my dues, time after time, I’ve done my sentence but committed no crime. And bad mistakes I’ve made a few. I’ve had my share of sand kicked in my face but I’ve come through… We are the champions, my friends, and we’ll keep on fighting ‘til the end.” We all know the song, we all know Queen’sWe are the Champions’. Let me tell you, as long as we have God on our side, we are the champions of this world, because we will live in Eternity with the creator of all. We will overcome all our trials, our troubles, and we will be dubbed champions over death, if we just allow Christ into our lives. In Christ we will always rise above hate, bigotry, fear, sorrow, loss, and disappointment. We never know what tomorrow will bring. We will always feel the rainbow of emotions, but we will always have help getting through the tough days we WILL have. Have faith in the lord. Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understand. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.”

How do you communicate with God?

How do you communicate with God?

For new Christians I’ve heard this question asked many time over, ‘How do I talk to God?’ I’ve always thought of God as an unquantifiable being that deserved the utmost respect. When I talk to God I feel as if I’m talking to an old friend, but the truth is, if we follow scripture we need to remember our place. Philippians 4:6 “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God.” In all things be thankful to God. Thank God for the good and the bad knowing that even in the bad there is hope and there is purpose. We may not understand the purpose but the understanding though it would be nice, isn’t required of us. Luke 11:9 “And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you.” Do not mistake this verse. This verse is talking about heaven and the Holy Spirit. The God of all is King over all. We need to remember that when we ask, we ask humbly. God is not Santa Clause and doe not ‘owe’ you anything. We were not owed eternal salvation; it was given, and given at a high cost. If God never gave us anything we ever asked for we would still have more then we deserved in the grace of Heaven.

We as Christians are called to do more then pray. While we do pray for everything under the sun, and not just our galactic wish list, we are supposed to pray for one another. More then just praying for one another we are supposed to confess to one another. James 5:16 “Confess [your] faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.” Part of our communications is talking with and praying for other Christians. We are part of the 3-way call and although our generation rarely uses the phone to ‘TALK’ to anyone, back in the day we used to talk to more then one friend in a conversation over the phone. While no one on this early plane can absolve you of your sins, we are still supposed to encourage others by knowing when they failed, lift them up and help them seek the right path. Knowing when people fail doesn’t make them any less worthy. We all fail on different levels, but no matter what it is, failure happens. It is in our failures we learn the most, so as Christians we are commanded NOT to judge, not shouldn’t judge, and it’s in this moment we turn to the Lord in prayer and as for the forgiveness of sins.

“Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need” Hebrews 4:16 Pray with conviction, but with respect. Pray for answers when you are lost and do not know the way. Allow the questions to come forth, and allow the Lord to answer and teach you. Even if we do not know the words or how to explain it, God knows. We need only to thank God for being in our lives, thank God for the blessings and respect the phenomenal cosmic power. We know God is more then just a genie to come to our beckon call. First God can and has brought people back from the dead, and no I don’t mean Zombie. Second, although God doesn’t and wont force love because of the nature of free will, God will do everything to place you in favorable situation to meet the right person for you. And well, how you handle it whether you blow it or not is on you.

Either way you look at it, God is our King. God is our Abba (Father) and should be treated with the fear and respect you would have for anyone that could squish the whole earth like a Vader force choke in a second. Have respect, but always approach God with everything on your heart.

 

Why I became The Arrow Preacher

Why I became the Arrow Preacher

A question I’ve been asking myself is why this path? Why have I chosen to dawn the hood, teach myself to be an archer, learn the Bible and teach others. I don’t know the path I live on, or where it will take me. All my life I’ve felt out of place, I have felt like something was wrong. The only part of my life that makes sense, the only part of my life that seems to be going well, knowing that I am writing and making a difference. It feels good knowing that I am in some small way doing God’s work.

For so long in my life I wished I could be someone else, anyone other then who I was. I dreaded every day I would wake up and head out into the world. I never cared for what I saw in the mirror, or the pain and suffering I had in my heart every day. I had always had a love for archery and characters that were archers. One in particular the Green Arrow became a quick favorite of mine. For years I would dress as the character for Halloween. I continued to train myself with my bows and as time went on, more and more people started to call me the Arrow.

During the time I spent under the hood it became clearer I was more comfortable under the hood then that everyone saw me as every day. As I began to write on Facebook the more I wrote the more people started to gravitate to it. In time the suggestion would start to come that I create my own blog, separate from Facebook, A place where my voice could and would be heard. Eventually I would be told by the right people, at just the right time in my life to start this blog.

Over the last few months as I’ve seen my blog take flight, I now find myself evaluating where I’m going. I find myself comfortable in my reasonable success with my blog and finding a sense of pride with each new country my blog is viewed from.

These days my persona feels more real then my life. I feel I am doing my best work when I am writing and reaching out to others. God has blessed me with some wonderful abilities, and I am thankful every day for them. To allow my pain to reach others and not let that pain destroy me I can only praise God. My pain the suffering I’ve endured has taught me much it will not be in vein. If I can reach others in similar pain, those who’ve gone through depression, anxiety, divorce, self loathing, the thoughts and feelings we all have at some point. God has blessed me with a great deal over the years. As I have survived on setback after another in my life, it is always God who’s lifted me out of the shadows, brought me back into the light, brought me back to life. The war is far from over, and as I see myself a warrior for Christ I will not give up till my last breath is taken to bring others unto his flock.

I will continue to use my gifts, use this hood and this mask, and to use my bow to reach others any way I can. This blog is an outlet for the daily struggles I face, along with things I know others have and are facing. I can only hope to reach as many people as possible. For all of my followers, THANK YOU! I am so grateful for each and every one of you. I am honored so have such wonderful followers.