Tag: personal

The Grass Ain’t Greener

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The Grass Ain’t Greener      

Recently as some of you who read my blogs have already figured out I suffered a horrible separation. Because of that this topic’s been weighing on my mind. Often when we look across the yard and things look pretty good. We look at other peoples lives, we look at what others have, we look to other people and we often think how good they have it, or how great it would be to own that, or even how good it would be to be with someone else. We usually call this the grass is greener phase. The thing about this phase is, it’s a lie. The Devil has been perpetrating this lie since the original day of sin. The day in the garden Satan convinced Eve that life would be better after eating from the tree of knowledge. He convinced her that living a life with open eyes would be better then that which God had created for them. The Devil made it sound like the grass was greener on the other side. The sad part was once Eve stepped over to the other side and realized how wrong she was the damage was done and it couldn’t be fixed. The fall from grace had happened and now the beautiful grass she once had died, and she could never have that life back again.

When we pursue the greener grass we are looking through a distorted keyhole lens that only shows us what we want to see, not what we need to see. How often do we hear the stories about people crossing over to the other side just to find out it’s not great at all, and they wish they could go back. The sad part is when you cross over and then in doing so you destroy not only your life but also others around you. Recently in my life I knew a couple that had been together for about 10 years or so. The father had gone through a horrible divorce because his first wife had an affair and destroyed the marriage. After a while of healing he met a new woman who’d become his second wife. They would have a great life, a great house, their children became a family, and at least from the spectator point of view their life looked pretty good. OF course there are things we never see from the outside, but I know I was a bit envious of everything they had. I found out rather suddenly that she had an affair, lied about it, continued the affair, and it quickly fell apart. She destroyed her own career, she broke the hearts of the kids, broke her husbands heart and as he suffered this kind of loss now for the second time his pain now unimaginable. I’ve not talked to her since then but the question is ‘was it worth it?’ Though I’ll never have the answer I have to imagine at some point the rose goggles will be removed and the beauty will turn to ash.

In my own life I have suffered something very similar. Two wives, two affairs, and as with the first time, the second time has left me broken and displaced. This time around my faith is guiding me. This time around I am stronger than I was before. This time I know I have more to offer. I heard a saying once a few years ago, “The grass is greener where you water it.” Marriage isn’t easy sometimes, and sin pulls at our hearts and all manner of earthly desires but when you get married it’s for life, it’s not for as long as it’s convenient. The idea of sin in the marriage such as divorce is repugnant to God. The old saying is you can look but don’t touch apparently is more of a guideline these days. Even looking can be a pitfall if it becomes envy or lust. There are so many people out there who have spouses who became cheaters, so many relationships fail because of infidelity. God’s heart breaks watching so many relationships crumble because of such things. Genesis 2: 21:22 “So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh.22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made[h] into a woman and brought her to the man.” Woman was made to be of one flesh. Woman was made so man wouldn’t be alone, and vise versa. When two people marry they become one flesh. They are devoted and when there is infidelity the heartbreak that’s caused can be deeper then some can handle. I wish we could have the eyes of God to see what God see’s within the hearts of those broken by infidelity, by lies, by deceits. I wish those who do such evil things knew how it feels to be on the receiving end. I wish I knew or understood the minds and hearts of those who do this to others. I wish that we could receive Gods love for humanity. I wish we loved as God loves.

Much like the man from my story earlier I feel the pain he feels, I have seen through his eyes, and I know the pain of the knife, the pain of betrayal, the sting of lies. Was the grass greener, I may never know, but I know my future looks bright. For every tragedy we face in our lives there is a potential for great redemption. In every tragedy God is working to use it for the betterment of our lives. No matter how much pain we face, no matter how much sorrow or anger that’s in our hearts letting go of that poison and finding a new pasture to raise your home is the first step. Forgiveness and letting go of that anger and hate, saying it a thousand times over, letting yourself weep and feel, ‘I forgive you.’ You must learn to believe in the goodness of people. You must learn that each person you encounter is not the last. Holding onto anger and holding onto hatred are chains for your very soul that leave you stuck in the place that, that wound first happened and you can’t break free till you face the pain head on. You must fight the urge to stay angry, you must fight the urge to hate. We are not the judge and we are not the jury. Deuteronomy 32:35 “To me belongeth vengeance, and recompence; their foot shall slide in due time: for the day of their calamity is at hand, and the things that shall come upon them make haste.” We are not to hold onto the cancer that holds us back.

When our worlds fall down because of someone else and it looks like our grass is dying, and we feel we’ll never be whole again remember that tears of healing may fall and will water your grass. Let them flow, let the healing begin and watch as God uses the miraculous to change your life. Every day you must learn to take care of your own yard, tend to your garden, tend to your flock and watch as the healing waters sprout new life into your life and sooner than you think your grass will be green and full of life. The glory of our lives and our calamities all belong to the grace of God. God sees the pain, feels the pain, and endures the pain. God was with Jesus on that Cross, and as we fight to bare our own cross Christ our Lord, one with the Father Abba is with us on our cross. The whips that strike us strike God. The words that cut our hearts cut the heart of God. Nothing we go through in this life affects only us. As I have grown a great deal I have found that the wounds I’ve endured over these last 8 months are not mine alone, and I wouldn’t be standing if it weren’t for God. I myself broke Gods heart 8 months ago, and I have to pray and ask for that forgiveness. I asked God to forgive me as I was dying in that ambulance and hearing the voice of God “You’re forgiven” I woke and new life was breathed into my chest. The only grass that’s greener in our lives we won’t find here. It’s only when we go home, when we finally reach our place in paradise will the grass ever be greener. Don’t loose sight of the promise made and remember God’s promise to us is not empty, it’s full of truth and life.

When the world tries to lure you away from your own piece of grass, when you are being tempted to cross over that fence, remember not only will your grass die where you were, there will be no blessing on the land where you are headed. Have faith that if you are on the fence and you are thinking of crossing over because you feel life would be better on the other side, think of Matthew 4:29-31 “He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.” 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” Much like Peter we must trust in the Lord will not let us be consumed by the storm. When you are struggling in your relationship there’s always a better way. Fight for your relationship, fight with everything you’ve got and trust in the Lord to save you when times are darkest.

 

 

 

 

 

Broken Sky

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Broken Sky

The pain inside caused by you shattered like a mirror to the floor all around.

God protect me so I can put the peaces back together.

God give me your eyes so I can see the reasons why.

The tears that fall, fall like bricks to the ground. The flood all around now from tears I’ve spent.

Why would you do this I scream, why oh why I cry.

Nothing’s all right, nothings okay, I’m fine I say, but the lie that lies.

I’m broken hearted and I feel fractured inside, torn to which way to go.

A second chance, a third and forth, but nothing helps.

God tells me I’m more than what I feel. Tears drench my shirt, my desk, my everything.

I’m not who I once was, I am afraid, and I don’t know what else to do.

God hurts too, or so the Bible tells me so.

God am I being punished for my mistakes, is this only path?

God says no, no punishment, free will makes the heart break.

We are more than the mistakes we make. We are remade in the light, washed by the waters.

God stay with me tonight, God hold me tonight, Abba I need you today. I’m broken.

God my pain is deep and I feel like I’ll never be whole again. Abba save me from my sorrow.

God my God please save me tonight. Help me fight what I feel, help me feel today I can be saved.

God please bless me, please don’t make me wait. God my God help me, I need to feel you here.

God my God I know that I’ll be stronger in the end.

God my Abba please stand with me in this fire, please help me not feel the pain as the fire burns away the old.

God my God please help my heart, please hold me tonight. God my God don’t forsake me tonight.

What don’t kill ya makes ya stronger I know, but I can’t do it alone. My God my God don’t let me fall tonight.

The Hard Love I feel, the pain inside, fractured and broken, I am shattered in the mirror on the ground.

God my God, my Father, please piece me back together better than I was before.

My God my God please allow me to be rid of the rocky road, protect me from the Devil, please I beg of thee.

Safe Journey

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Safe Journey

A close friend of my, my Pastor left on a trip to Europe, and this just after two terrorist attacks in Europe, the UK to be specific. This reminded me of the story so often played out in the Bible, the New Testament to be exact. Luke 4: 28-30 “All the people in the synagogue were furious when they heard this. They got up, drove him out of the town, and took him to the brow of the hill on which the town was built, in order to throw him off the cliff. But he walked right through the crowd and went on his way.” Jesus knew when it was time to go, and time to stay. Jesus was well aware of his surroundings, and we could learn a thing or two.

No matter where we go, or what we’re doing we know that God is always with us, so the scripture says. If the journey is long and dangerous which it is, then it looks like Jesus is the muscle, our bodyguard, our protector. Matthew 6:25 “Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; not yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more then meat, and the than rainment? This verse goes on to say all things will be provided to the faithful, and worrying about the day or tomorrow doesn’t actually give you any more ability or power to change the outcome. You can worry about being taller all day long, but that doesn’t mean you will get taller. Psalm 23:4 The Valley of the Shadow Of Death, yet peace and comfort come.

I’ve traveled a lot of places in my 33 years on this world. I have had good and bad travels. The closest I ever came to death or at least as it appeared from where I was standing, or better put nearly falling, was returning to Camp Junction City in Ar-Ramadi from my R&R in Qatar. We were in a C-130 headed for Baghdad. There was a sandstorm while we were supposed to land so we circled for a while. At some point the decision was made to send us back to Qatar, but we needed something first, fuel. The mid air refuel wouldn’t take too long once the plane arrived with two F-16 escorts. The sandstorm was getting pretty bad from what we were told. Just after the fueling process was over we started to turn to make our way back to Qatar. When the F-16’s broke off to head back to where they came from apparently one of them suffered severe engine failure and began to crash. The pilot ejected and was later recovered unharmed. As for us we returned to the bright and sunny island where I’d spend another week before a second transport attempt. On the second trip to Baghdad we were carrying a slew of gym equipment. This time when we reached the City we circled because there was a good bit of firefights around the area we were supposed to land. We’d been circling for a bit when we decided to stand and walk around the plane. Without warning the plane banked hard to the starboard side. My feet went out from under me and I reached up to grab the piece of equipment that I was hopping was safely secured to the deck plate. One of the guys wasn’t so lucky and he hit the bench and the wall of the plane. He screamed he was all right though so not to worry. We leveled off and the pilot told us to get back to the seats and hold on tight. We started to nose dive and the pit of your stomach flew straight into your throat. We leveled out again and without any notice the landing gear dropped and seconds later we were back on Iraqi soil. Once we landed we received word the reason for the drastic and violent course changes was because we were taking fire. The pilot told us it was small arms fire but still following procedure, no one was seriously injured. Our trip came to an abrupt end, but it ended safely.

We realize that in our walk with Christ we aren’t always going to be safe. We realize that sometimes that safety is only an illusion, because in Christianity we may be called to go places where it’s not safe, where being a Christian is still punishable by death. We don’t have to worry about that here in the United States, however, what we have might be far worse for our walk with Christ. We have the world. The world as we know it is corrupt and evil. The world tries to get us, it tries to get us to sin in all different kinds of ways. The world wants us to fail, and the attack on our souls in the US might be worse than the attacks on our bodies in some of the other countries. We have our ways to protect ourselves but only if we carry it with us in our hearts, that’s the word and Holy Spirit of God. When we go out into the world to proclaim the name of Christ we need to keep our wits about us. We must be careful because the Devil slithers around seeking for his next target.

Each and every one of us in on our own journey, our own path, running our own race and at every step of that race there can be an obstacle for us to face. The race is not a sprint, but a marathon for us that will take endurance and patience. 2 Timothy 4:7 “I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith.” How will you finish your journey, will it be strong, pushing yourself, or will you fall and give up on yourself? God won’t give up on you, so you shouldn’t. You’re stronger then you think you are, and if our God is for us, who then can be against us?

Lian Yu (Purgatory)

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Lian Yu (Purgatory)

Before Christ we were trapped by sins in an eternal death. The Roman Catholics believe Purgatory is a state in between death and heaven where you expiating sin prior to entering the gates of heaven. This is the atoning for sin meaning to pay for or redeem. While the idea of there being a purgatory is highly controversial we won’t be getting into that debate. I am by no means trained well enough to go down that rabbit hole and open that can of worms. Instead, the purgatory we will discuss is the one inside our own minds, and the situations we find ourselves in. If purgatory is a form of prison it can be postulated that your own mind can be a prison. We know this because we have thoughts we often don’t want to, we remember things that bring feelings of pain of hurt. We often find ourselves in situations that bare similarities to those that we’ve been through before, almost as if history itself is being repeated. For some, being trapped in the past is the worst kind of Hades we can have. For others they get themselves into situations that are trouble over and over again. While I don’t believe this is a form of punishment while on this earthly plane of existence, I do believe that if we are repeating the same mistakes and we aren’t learning from them, then perhaps God is trying to get us to pass the test to move on. Other times we go through the same thing over and over because of our own choices, even if they are destructive.

I myself have experienced purgatory. When I returned from Iraq I found myself constantly expecting the next IED to go off, constantly scanned every place I went for insurgents trying to blend in. Every shadow there was the enemy lurking just waiting to attack. Then the thoughts came back of the war. All things considered I’d say my platoon and I were lucky. Yes we took casualties, but as many times as we were attacked the damage was superficial and rarely caused any injury. Even though that was the case, the attacks and the feelings that were left behind, where in fact imprinted and left behind for later reflection. Over time it felt as if those memories would show up and torture me at random. It felt as if I were a prisoner to them, my own personal purgatory.

In the last few years I’ve known several people who’ve gotten themselves into ruts of destructive behavior. They would claw themselves out only to get to the top of the mud hill and as soon as they got out, stand up, stretch, turn and swan dive back into the thick of it. One would guess they loved being in that destructive cycle. The truth is it’s harder then people think to break free. Once we are mentally trained for something it’s very difficult to break that cycle. There are a lot of factors that can play into it, where you live, your friends, the music you choose to listen too, even some shows you may watch. (Disclaimer: No I’m not blaming movies, or music, or video games for bad behavior. However there is enough evidence that some, i.e. a small percentage of the population are susceptible to suggestion from these outlets.) The truth is our hearts can and will be influenced by the things we surround ourselves with. Eventually it’s like ingesting small amounts of lead over time. It may not kill us right away, but eventually we will end up with lead poisoning. It’s best to avoid that stuff when we can. Find positive and influential things to fill your life with, either, friends, movies, churches, music, whatever it may be, as long as it’s going to lift up, rather then manipulate behavior in a negative way. 1 Peter 4:15-16 “15 But let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an evildoer, or as a busybody in other men’s matters. 16 Yet if any man suffer as a Christian, let him not be ashamed; but let him glorify God on this behalf.”

So all that being said, how do we avoid entering into purgatory? Well, in a religious sense don’t be habitual sinners. If you are mean and cruel to people and bad things happen to you, chances are you brought that upon yourself. By changing our focus and changing our hearts and minds, giving up and sacrificing our worldly self to Christ, we can then move forward cleansed and free of old sins. Our daily walk should prevent us from entering into man made, self-made perpetual prisons. A purgatory for your mind is harder to achieve. Sometimes we have no control over the trauma’s we endure. I have always been a firm believe of a two pronged approach therapy. The first is for your mind, to actually work on the event that caused the issue. The second is for your heart, and that’s a spiritual journey by someone in the clergy. We can’t have one without the other because we must take care of both the heart and the mind. Both will influence the other, and both have to be in a healthy place and a healthy balance. Don’t allow yourself to be held prisoners by the horrors we may face. Find your spiritual footing and allow those people in ministry to help you. Do not create your own purgatory, instead allow yourself to freely walk away leaving everything behind that held you in chains. Repent for your sins and within that repentance remember it’s not just saying you’re sorry, it’s making an action to make up for the mistake. Mark 5:4 “because he had often been bound with shackles and chains, and the chains had been torn apart by him and the shackles broken in pieces, and no one was strong enough to subdue him.” Jesus freed us from the bonds of sin, and the eternal damnation that followed for it. It takes strength and dedication to overcome the chains of the world, the lustful desires that bind us to our prisons. Fight the sin urges, flee from sinful drama, and seek Godly counsel when in need. Always has if what you are doing glorifies God, and if you don’t think it will, or wouldn’t talk to your pastors or priest about what you are thinking of doing, it’s probably not a good idea to do it.

We can’t always help what happens to us, we can’t always help the scars it leaves behind, but how we choose to handle each of those situations, where we choose to get help for them will be the defining factor as to our eternal future. If life gets hard and you choose to turn to the bottle chances are that bottle will become your purgatory. If you choose to turn to the counsel of God, you’ll undoubtedly have better luck. Don’t create your own prisons, and don’t go searching for purgatory.

Making A Plan

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Making A Plan

All my life I had a plan, I knew how the plan was going to go, I knew how my life was going to unfold, and I knew how to execute the plan. Well, a day before I graduated high school the plan fell apart. ‘The defense department regrets to inform you that you have be found ineligible for the selection into the United States Marine Corps. “ Well, there went my plan. I was so certain I would make it into the Armed Services I barely spent any time on my college testing, and I had only applied to two universities. Both of which I was accepted to, though, I hadn’t planned for how I was going to pay for college. So my plan flew off the rails before it even got going. After a year of moving around a bit, I got a job but wasn’t satisfied with life. I was terrified of college and failing so I ran away from that as fast as I could. It was just by pure coincidence (if there is such a thing) that I ran into an Air Force recruiter in the store. I had talked to him about my denial letter and re suggested I reapply. A few months later I moved back home to live with my Grandfather, and I talked to my local recruiter. Everything was looking good, the process was going along smoothly, and away to MEPS I went. Something was wrong though. I didn’t feel the choices in the Air Force fit my personality and my drive. When I got back from MEPS my recruiter wasn’t there at the recruiting station. I was really upset by that, and I stormed into the Army recruiting office and started talking to them. Within 10 minutes I was headed home with a list of Army jobs, and a slew of information. I had at least 13 jobs circled for further review within the 15-minute drive home. This looked promising I said to myself. I went to MEPS again for the final time before I would ship out, the rest of my testing was done; the job selection process came up. Cavalry Scout was the dream job. There was only 1 slot open so we had to write an essay between two of us candidates. Mine was chosen and I advanced to get a ship date, 6-month wait.

For the next 6 months I would train, and I would enjoy the time I had left with close friends. I would be headed to Fort Knox for one station unit training, and while I was there I would get my duty station. I had signed up for a 1-year hardship in Korea. I figured, if I was going to go to war at least I could have some training in the Army first. During basic I was doing well, I was getting faster, stronger, and testing well. I was moving along to graduate then all of a sudden I ended up with MERSA and I was hospitalized for 4 days. I missed out on vital training, so instead of graduating with my class, I would be recycled through to the next class to graduate. This hit me like a ton of bricks. The plan wasn’t cooperating. I would graduate 6 weeks later then planned. I went to Korea and placed in my unit up at Camp Casey. 1 year in Korea wasn’t going to be so bad. I had a plan, and if I liked it I might even stay one more year after that. Except the plan wasn’t going to cooperate again. We as a unit were being removed from Korea, sent to Iraq and our new home location would be determined while we were in theater. I choose Korea because hardship duty stations didn’t deploy to other combat zones, or they hadn’t in almost 50 years. All that time and effort I spent getting away from the war for a little while just vanished in front of me.

While in country I would get hurt (non combat related) I would loose friends (combat related) and I would endure hardships. I would get home and try my best to keep making plans. Relationships wouldn’t go to plan, I would end up having surgery on my knee, I would get married, then get out of the military ahead of schedule. I moved, and then moved to Europe as a civilian military spouse. I would loose that marriage to an affair. I met a wonderful woman, eventually would marry her and then in time watch as my life was torn apart by yet another grisly affair.

So, that’s pretty much the last 15 years. I look back and I snicker at how well my best laid plans would work. I heard a quote just a couple weeks ago “Make the plan, Execute the plan, Expect the plan to go off the rails, Throw away the plan.” (The Flash) That statement couldn’t be truer. What does God think of our plans? Well, funny you should ask, Proverbs 15:22 “Without counsel plans fail, but with many advisers they succeed.” As we all know, even as much as we may want something, that doesn’t mean that’s what God has planned for us. Amos 3:7 “For the Lord God does nothing without revealing his secret to his servants the prophets.” Since we haven’t seen any prophets in a long time, it’s safe to say we often fly blind. Another saying to laugh about is “Tell God your plans and watch Him laugh.”

Living by following the cross, and doing our very best to listen to what God has planned for us is the closest we have to knowing plans will even partially work. When God closes a door we have a hard time understanding why, we have a hard time accepting no as an answer. For some it’s not a no, it’s just a not yet, but for others, their fate is down a different rabbit hole. We all know that the best-laid plan is to follow Christ. Read the scripture and the lessons left for us to follow and you can’t go wrong. Not all our plans are meant to work, some are because of our own doing, and some will fail because of others. The path your on doesn’t actually end, it just splits. It’s up to all of us to choose the path we feel lines closest to what God wants for us. James 4:13-17 “Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.” As it is, you boast in your arrogant schemes. All such boasting is evil. If anyone, then, knows the good they ought to do and doesn’t do it, it is sin for them.”

I’ll leave you with this story as a close. August 2012, just three months before I was scheduled to be married I was out with my girlfriend and her father. She had just got a new Smith & Wesson Bodyguard semi automatic pistol. It’s a little .380 about the size of my hand. We’d been out shooting for a little while and I opted to shoot last. I was testing out the built in laser and I went to a knee to see how accurate it was. I held the gun steady and I squeezed the trigger. It jumped like no tomorrow as I felt a huge wave of air on my face. It felt like a book had been waved in front of my face, then hit me. I went to stand up, but I couldn’t see completely. My face was red hot, and I could feel the warm hot liquid poor from my face. I could feel it on my hand when I touched my face, and it was at that moment I realized I was in need of help. I turned around and dropped to a knee. We would later find the bullet casing had exploded in the chamber. It buckled the guns plastic, and peppered my eye protection with bits of shrapnel. Sadly my glasses didn’t protect my entire face and my cheek, nose, and forehead weren’t so lucky. My vision was saved due to the glasses, but to this day a piece of shrapnel still remains in my right cheek as the surgeon was unable to remove the tiny fragment in fear of doing more harm then good. Every day we went shooting we always planned and executed safety as best we could. On this particular day it happened to be, I was doing what I was supposed to, I wore what I was supposed to, but I was still injured. Thankfully the shrapnel wasn’t lower and it didn’t go through the artery in my neck. Even the best laid, most carefully thought out plans can quickly go to all Hades. Just remember that sometimes, when our plans go off the rails THAT may be part of the bigger plan after all.

Lift up Don’t Tear Down

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Lift up Don’t Tear Down

Brothers and sisters in Christ we have a commandment we often fall short on. John 13:34-35“34 A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. 35 By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” I have been listening to a song lately I know was not meant to be a Christian song, but I hear it as such. God Gave Me You, the version I have is Dave Barnes. “God Gave me you for the ups and downs.” When I think of who that is I think of Christ. I know that Christ above all else is there for me no matter what situation I’m in, where I am, or how far off the path I’ve gotten. Something I’ve struggled with as of late is how individuals have been treating me. I have had several friends turn their backs on me, and walk away for one reason or another. I have put a lot of thought and self-reflection as to why that might be. I often think back to Job. As Job looses everything one by one he asks his good buddies to come over to his house. We all want to be around people to just lean on when things are tough. We expect our friends to help us bare our crosses, help us get through. When you’re single you expect your friends to get you out of the house. When you’re grieving for the loss of loved ones you expect your friends to be there as a shoulder to cry on. We expect people to be there for us not just because we feel it’s the right thing to do, but it’s actually what they are supposed to do. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.” Why is this so difficult for some to do?

I know a doctor trained in Dialectible Behavior Therapy, and I asked why as a people do we focus so much on the negative rather then the positive. The answer was fairly straight forward, she said, our brains have a natural response to negative because that’s what keeps us alive. The negative actions stand out because it goes against the grain. Driving along going home you pass by a dozen cars doing the right thing, but then a car cuts you off. You won’t remember the 12 cars doing the right thing, that 1 car however will be what stands out. The more I thought about what she said the more it made sense.

I have been using Facebook lately to spread the word of this blog. I post once or twice a day, and as I have felt my blog has been doing well, I’ve noticed amongst my Facebook friends it’s not really picked up. I went about 2 months without posting anything except the auto post of my blog. I had a rough day and I posted something about manners, how some people will just leave you high and dry and how rude I felt that was. My page exploded with angry posts about how people are busy, and I shouldn’t be shaming my friends, and how I should keep those types of posts to myself. I was in shock to see such feedback. I post some beautiful pieces of writing, highly uplifting, and scripturally based, and I don’t get more then maybe 1 thumb up 4-5 if I’m truly lucky. Of all things to get noticed this one factual and understandable frustration gets all the attention. I thought to myself, what about everything else I’ve done? The fact is that it matters to the people who read it, and those who don’t see only what they want to see.

Love is harder then hate. Thinking positive is harder then negative, and those who do think positive have to work harder. If it’s true that our brains are naturally wired to focus on the negative things for whatever reason, being negative is the easy way out. Learning to focus on God, and do Gods will is a difficult road. As many of my so called friends have abandoned ship, I find it interesting that they do so when I fully devote my life to Jesus. It seems my life is going through a process of cleansing, weeding out those who are of little use to my ministry. The ones left in my life will be the ones who’ve helped me bare my cross when it was too heavy to carry. We must learn to walk with patience and love for our brothers and sisters who’ve yet to realize the true power of the Holy Spirit. The Cross is heavy for us all to bare and for some the cross can be so heavy we collapse under the weight of it. We have to have more patience with our loved ones, and understand that how we treat someone when they are going through a hard time is going to be remembered. How do you want to be treated with your life is in shambles? Make the choice to lift up your neighbors and help them in their time of need. No they may not take your advice, but if you just offer an ear, just be there to let them know you care, that itself will go a long way. We aren’t always there to fix their problems, often just to be a listening post, and a shoulder. Be kind because it only takes a moment without hope to watch the candle be extinguished. Remind people by your actions that good people still exist. Remind them that love is still stronger then hate. And if you ever have a problem you just can’t carry, lean on me.

Finding Happiness

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Finding Happiness

This seems to be a pursuit that most people are on for the vast majority of their lives. It’s strange how hard it is. We often look for happiness in items, in trinkets or people. I have always struggled with this aspect of my life. Even when I have everything I could ever need, I am always looking towards the horizon. I guess a part of me always felt to be happy meant to be improving my situation, making more friends, finding more people to talk to, always building my marriage. I guess I could have been considered to be Debby Downer for at least a good portion of the time. What is it I was seeking I wonder, what was it that kept me looking for more? The truth is there was something missing in my life, Jesus. When I realized I hadn’t given myself up to the Lord, not completely, by the time I did it was too late, my life, as I had known it was over. I put so much into my worldly possessions, my wife, my home, my job, and my friends, that in one big event, my very foundation cracked and toppled my own personal city. The changes in my life would be abrupt and violent. They would reshape my personal universe and it would never be the same again.

What’s the trick though to finding that happy place? In Peter Pan it’s finding a happy memory, one memory that stands out of pure joy to hold on to. Even in the midst of so much pain and anguish we are surely able to come up with something. One thing I’ve found is we place so much on the world, that we forget this isn’t the end. Sure we don’t want to be miserable day in and day out either, but it’s more about the mission, the journey, the race, then it is about today. When we change our mindset to the present, the mission Jesus gave to us, and we take heed to the lessons Christ taught us and the teaching of the disciples, we will find that happiness is rejoicing in the Lord and the Lord alone. There will be trouble but in that trouble we can use those times to show the kind of person we are. We can make those horrible situations into a teaching lesson for others, and show how God wants us to behave even when the odds are stacked against us, even when their looks to be no worldly hope, because to say there’s no hope is a lie. There were many times when King David had the odds stacked against him, but it was through the grace of God that he emerged victorious. Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” It’s not an easy thing to be content when you’re in suffering. It’s harder to find happiness in the midst of want and destruction. Philippians 4:11 “Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content.” Human nature is to want and want more, want what we can’t have, and often take what we want even if it’s not ours to have.

2 Timothy 3:1-7 “3 But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people. 6 For among them are those who creep into households and capture weak women, burdened with sins and led astray by various passions, 7 always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth.” When we go through life taking what we want no matter the consequences we find ourselves destroying the very fabric of order in the world. I was recently the victim of something like this. With no limit to the amount of pain one feels when something near and dear to them is taken away, alas the pain is more when it’s done so by more then one party. The sad truth is greed and desires of the worldly flesh now resonate with the world. Paul Harvey did a report on ‘If I was the Devil.” During this little expo he noted that if he was the Devil he’d convince the world that drugs are okay, that swinging is more fun, that hard work is no longer the wave of the future.

I think the pursuit of happiness falls within each moment. I believe that to truly find it you need to learn to change your mindset away from the pain and suffering and embrace them. How we embrace our pain is hard. How we find contentment even in the center of the worst storms we may face is never an easy task. For every situation however there must be at least something that is positive, there must be at least some light at the end of the tunnel. We often spend so much time focused on the negative part of a tough spot that we fail to look at the positive situations and be thankful for them. For me this has been a long hard struggle and I am by no means perfect at this, but everyday I try to work towards this goal. Am I happy every day and do I find joy in my sufferings, of course not. But what I do find is a little bit of peace knowing that God is in control over everything I am going through, and when others hurt me, or forsake me, I know that God has not. People will say and do mean things to you for a variety of reasons, each more plausible as the next. As much as it hurts that trust and loyalty may be broken, know that through this situation you will learn, you will grow, and you can make your tomorrow a better place. When a forest grows to big purging fires must take place in order for the forest to grow back and regain some of what was lost. Our lives it seems are much in the same. Sometimes we must let go of the baggage that weighs us down. We must learn to let go of people who are always bringing us down. Now, I will say this, when I say bringing us down, I don’t mean people who are going through rough times. What I mean by that is when people actively say things to you to bring you down, or are negative and hurtful. If someone is not actively trying to be there for you, to lift you up, to help you get out of the hole you’re in, those are the people you don’t need around anymore.

Don’t fall victim to your own pain, don’t let your pain or your own struggles from finding the happy places in your life. When we truly embrace and accept that bad things will happen, and truly embrace the fact that God is sovereign we can let go of many of the pessimistic views we once held. We all loose friends, we all loose our jobs, our families, our loved ones; it’s a matter of life following its natural evolution. Be glad for the positive things you can take out of your memories, and cast away the sorrows. Don’t let life pass you by in misery; it’s too short to do so. Don’t be a slave to this world. Don’t let the world dictate who you are. The world cannot define you, only you can do that. You have the power to show the people around you how you handle each situation, and in every case you are the only one who can show who you are. As one of my favorite quotes go, “It’s not who I am underneath, it’s what I do that defines me.” (Batman Begins)

 

Private Property

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Private Property

Alone in the house I sit, the walls around and the roof above provide protection from the wolves at night, the predators that prowl searching for the weak. When we want to be left alone on our property we post Do Not Disturb signs. These signs let everyone know that their presence is not welcomed, not to enter without explicit permissions. That’s the unfortunate essence of our lives. Our creator gives us the choice of free will, so this summarily makes us sentient. With that free will comes the right to choose whether or not we will accept or deny the existence of God.

In Scripture it is written that those who follow in Christ will be saved, and those who do not will spend eternity suffering. It’s not easy for some to acknowledge there is something greater out there then they can see with their own eyes. For some the truth is reading between the lines. Reading and studying what exists but in the past. God never forces His way into our hearts. It must be a free voluntary choice to allow God into our lives. There is one however that ignores the stay out signs. The Devil a burglar that creeps around the shadows, pulling at strings, testing the defenses of the house, looking anyway in. Our heart is what the Devil wants. Our minds and our souls are what the Devil tries to gain access too. The Devil doesn’t look for our permission to wreak havoc in our lives. Why do we spend so much time and energy placing defenses for our homes, but we don’t do the same for our eternal souls? 1 John 3:8 “8 The one who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil’s work.” The Devil destroyed the relationship between God and his children. The Serpent divided the home and got Eve to disobey the Father. 2 Corinthians 11:3 “3 But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent’s cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ.” The Devil trespasses as often as he likes with no care for your own personal feelings.

 Vigilance is so important. We keep our homes locked at night, our vehicles locked in public. We do not leave our belongings lying around for anyone to take, so why then are we so careless with the only thing that truly matters, our eternal salvation? The most dangerous intruder we could ever come across and we almost give Him the keys to our home to come and go whenever he wants. 1 Peter 5:8-9 “8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.” The Devil will find any unlocked window, any loose bored, any unlocked door, anyway he can to break into your heart. It doesn’t matter if you have your private property sign out there it’s not enough. You have to find the protections and shields for your heart.

 We often fall pray to the worldly desires of our hearts thus giving in to a sin nature. What defenses do we have against the Devil? We have the Armor of God. We have the teaching and warnings of Christ. We were given the instructions and told to resist. We do this by knowing scripture, knowing it well enough to have it memorized to heart. Being able to see sin in our lives is an important first step. Remember how to treat others, knowing the right and wrong in our walk is vital to fighting sin nature. Others may harm us, others may steal from us, and the Devil will use our desires against us, it’s important to see what’s in front of us, and don’t take the bait.

 

 

The Fallen

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The Fallen

Riding into battle with swords raised the cavalry charged. For freedom they fight, or so they say, the brothers beside is why they stay. No ribbons, no parade, no heroes welcome, just a quiet house. The ones who live survive with guilt, the battle rages and never sleeps. The truth in the horrors are no fiction to see.

The fallen we miss and tears we cry. The family’s loss will leave them empty inside. The truth is held, but few will hear. The fallen at peace, the end was there. The memories are trapped for those who remain he love and loss for those who were slain.

We grill the food, and drink the beer, the music and friends to gather around. Let’s not forget the ones who are gone. John 15:13 “13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” We remember the fallen and the families left behind. The ones who hold the nightmares of the lost remember them as well. Pray for them and never forget.

War is hell and never leaves those who experience it. ‘Only the dead have seen the end of war’ Plato. Pray for peace, and pray for comfort. Pray for the remembrance of and pray for resolute to support. What does it mean to give up ones life for his friends? Mark 10:45 “45 For even the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many.” We were held captive by our sins. We were forever hopeless until the sacrifice of Christ for all of us. The price of eternal salvation was a steep one. Romans 5:6-8 “6 For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. 7 For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. 8 But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”

 If we have no hope in our lives what do we fight for? The question begs for the answers. Where does our compass point if there is not moral judgments that are cement. When anything is based on societies rules, which change through the generations, what do we fight for? If there is nothing to hope for then why give up anything for anyone else? Christ gave us hope. The promise of God to eternal salvation was paid for in full. Hope was then restored to all of us. Matthew 16:24-26 “24 Then said Jesus unto his disciples, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. 25 For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: and whosoever will lose his life for my sake shall find it. 26 For what is a man profited, if he shall gain the whole world, and lose his own soul? or what shall a man give in exchange for his soul?” Today we celebrate the fallen and remember that they fought and died for what the believed in. The freedoms of this country have been paid for at a high price. Don’t let those lives have died in vein.

Surrender ones self to the Lord and you shall live. When we surrender to something higher then ourselves we let go of our selfish wants, we may live and actually live, and for the ones who’ve died we live. We live with the horrors and nightmares from war. We remember what it takes to keep and maintain peace. Let us never forget.

Please Don’t Judge Me For My Yesterday, Judge Me For My Today

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Please Don’t Judge Me For My Yesterday, Judge Me For My Today

Matthew 7:1-2 “Judge not, that ye be not judged. 2 For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.” We make judgments all the time about people if we mean to or not. There are lots of different types of judgments we may encounter every day. We use judgments because they are shortcuts in life. She’s crazy is a judgment. That’s an awesome job is also a judgment. One of the things we often do is hold onto judgments of people. We condemn them to be whatever we judge them as forever.

Why are we creatures of such negativity? We are negative because it’s the opposite of love. We choose to see the negative because it’s easier. You’re driving home from work and the trip goes great, couple people let you in, and not an issue. Same scenario but instead 3 people cut you off and make you slam the breaks. How long will you be bothered by the second version, best guess is at least a while. If someone makes a mistake they are more likely to have that check against them and it would be more prevalent then if that person has a line fun of positive things. Sadly for many it seems, we are doomed to never escape our mistakes or shortcomings.

In my life I’ve made some huge mistakes, and it seems the memories of people is considerably longer then I remember it being. No matter how far we’ve come since then someone will always hold that mistake against you. No matter how much good you do, or how much positivity in your life, someone will always remember that 1 bad time, especially if it’s a big one. God wants us to forgive and move on. God doesn’t want us to judge one another. Luke 6:37 “Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:” When we hold someone accountable for a mistake in our personal lives, and no matter what they do they can’t get out from under it, you are not truly forgiving them.

Sadly people won’t let go of the past. People won’t biblically forgive you. This message isn’t really for those who have lived a perfect life, it’s for the ones who’ve made mistakes, the ones who’ve sinned and pray every day for forgiveness of it. The Devil wants us to fracture our relationship with God. Sometimes the Devil will try to attack us directly by pulling on our sinful desires, but when they fail the Devil tries the only other trick there is, attack us through our loved ones. Life gets tough sometimes and when it does that’s when we need the Armor of God more so then ever. I was told something for a long time. “Life’s tough, get a helmet.” That’s the truth and when we think of our helmet we know there is such a helmet we can don. Ephesians 6:17 “And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:” We cannot let the Devil inside our heads. We cannot fall pray to self pity, doubts, self loathing, self esteem problems, all of these things are the Devil manipulating you. Protect that brain bucket, by protecting it from all the incoming shrapnel the Devils tossing at as. The Devil will turn your friends on you, you will loose people you care about, you will be lied to, you will be forever reminded of the mistake you try so hard to forget. You continue to wear that armor and never let the Devil inside your head.

Don’t listen to the lies of the Devil. Don’t let anyone hold you back from being on the right path with Christ. When we repent of our mistakes we are forgiven and it’s in the past. 1 Corinthians 13:5 “Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;” Thinketh no evil to me means two things. 1st is it doesn’t keep score of the wrong your partner has done. 2nd is it doesn’t plot of doing wrongful things, i.e. adaultry for the one you love. Don’t let someone else keeping score bring you down. You will suffer long as a Christian, you will suffer for doing the right thing. If our Lord and Savior suffered at the hands of the cross, what little suffering we go through seems insignificant to that of an innocent lamb who was sacrificed for me.

It’s hard to be kicked when you’re down. When you loose something you cherished, and then over time you loose one friend after another, just remember the suffering of Job. At the end even his friends rebuked him blaming him for his own crucible. Remember it’s easier to recount the bad then the good. Have faith in the Word of God and when you are suffering, when you feel like all your friends are turning their backs on you, know that God won’t.

A prayer to my Lord.

Lord, please forgive me for my transgressions. Please release me of my guilt and allow me to fully repent for my wrongdoing. Lord please bless me with friends who will understand and who will stand by me, but if they don’t, pray for them. Know they no not what they do. Lord you are the only one who can Judge me. Lord please shield me from the Devils tricks and lies. Lord please bless those who come to my aid when I am that stranger on the road. Lord please allow my armor to protect me in all ways from the attacks of the Deceiver. Lord bless my loved ones, my friends, my neighbors. Lord grant me peace in my time, grant me a time of bliss when it suits your time. Lord give me the grace of understanding and patience to your masterpiece of a plan which is my life. Lord please allow my transgressions to be within short term memory of those who would use it against me. Let me therefore be judged in the actions I do today, and not those of the past. Allow people to see the man I am now, and not which I was before. Amen