Hardships Endure 

Hardships Endure 

It’s no secret that my life has been one of hardships, heartache, and difficulties. Not saying I haven’t had good times, even great times, but as a friend once told me, ‘if it weren’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have any luck at all.’ From an early age I have experienced hardships most people at my age couldn’t imagine, and wouldn’t have known what those hardships were called. As I was told, before I was three years old I knew the word Anesthesiologist. By the time I was three years old I had undergone 4 surgeries. By the time I was 16, I had 7 surgeries, and by the time I was 18 I had 9 surgeries. Needless to say, I was familiar with doctors and hospitals. 

By the time I was 19 I had moved several times. One of those times was a move by myself from Michigan across the country to Massachusetts. Each of the times, minus one, I moved by myself away from family. With every move I was left with heartache, and struggle. For most of my life I didn’t feel I had a home, and even now, I don’t have a place to call my own. The feeling of failure has been and is quite real for me. In recent months I have been given a grave diagnosis, and while I have been attempting to manage the emotional fallout, I find myself fatigued. How can I take care of myself, if I am broken and in constant pain. Chronic pain takes a toll on the human mind, and can often cause frustration, sadness, depression, and anger. On a deeper level, the combined aspects of pain, physical issues, living situation, it often leaves me feeling inadequate, worthless. I don’t care much for the idea of self-esteem, simply because we should know and understand our place in this world as broken, sinful, enemies of God. However, on the flip side of that coin, we are also loved and grafted into the Kingdom of God, through the grace and mercy of Jesus. Needless to say finding a balance is important. A balance I have not been doing so well at, as of late. 

When I go through hardships I try to think of a few characters from scripture. The first and most notable is Job. Job’s hardships are quite obvious and extensive. His losses and trials stand testament to struggles for all people. I then consider the trials Paul faced. As a loyal servant of Jesus, Paul faced beatings, stoning, jail, poverty, and ultimately murdered by beheading. Recently however, the person I have been considering most is Elijah. In his pain, he cried out to the Lord to take his life. In his sorrow he did not want to be left alive, as he also felt his surviving was that of failure. 

Soldiers who lose others, lose comrades in battle often feel what’s known as survivors’ guilt. It is said that those who survive often wish their places be switched with those who died. Elijah it seems may have been dealing with some of this guilt and challenges. I have felt this way in the past. When I lost friends in combat, I was there, and witnessed what happened. I attempted to save my friend, and sadly failed to do so. I had intuition of an impending attack, and sadly that did nothing to prevent it from happening. In recent times, I have wondered what my purpose is, and as I have recently been given a difficult prognosis regarding my physical health, I have been put into a position where I’m not sure how to manage the emotional fallout. This recent revelation of difficult times ahead has left me with little recourse, and no control over what happens next. 

In hard times I have grown from a scared 11-year-old, an angry 30-year-old, to a seasoned, faithful servant of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In the past I would compartmentalize a trauma, and move on. This would leave me more broken than where I started and never truly dealt or handled the trauma. Today, I face these problems head on. I look to James who says, count it all joy when you fall into various trials. How can I look at where I am and be in Joy? I have often asked myself, if James were to have been diagnosed with cancer would he still have found joy in such diagnosis? The answer, is yes. James knew and understood who the Lord Jesus was, and in that understanding he knew that whatever we go through in this life, it is temporary. It isn’t why we are going through these things, but rather how we respond to them. With the world watching us in every situation we are in, how are we showing our faith to the people around us? I’m not saying cancer is easy, nor am I saying major life changing back surgeries are easy either, but what I am saying is that, people are looking to you because you may be a mentor to them. You may be someone’s inspiration, or even someone’s curiosity. Here’s an example: 

You go to work every day, and people at work know you’re a Christian. You have a smile on your face, and you talk about Jesus, but life is generally smooth for you. A bombshell hits, and you lose a child in a car accident. This tragedy leaves you devastated, and you become bitter with God, or worse, you walk away all together. Those whom you once shared your faith with, now see you walking away. How strong was your faith, that you would walk away, and what message does that send to those who may have been on the fence to follow Jesus or not? Someone is always watching you, whether it be a friend, family, coworker, or one of the kids from Church. Someone is always watching, and how we deal with trials and tribulations, is more important than the worship we give during times of still waters. It is easy to praise God when it’s smooth sailing, but when the going gets tough, that’s when a persons’ true nature is exposed. I’m not saying we don’t struggle during hardships, but ultimately, how strong is your faith? Are you like Peter on the water with Christ? Faithful for a few moments, until the waves crash around you, and you sink? What did Jesus say? “Oh ye of little faith.” Do we have little faith when times get tough? 

We must work on our faith and focus on our attitude and behaviors, and our emotions. I myself struggle with emotional positivity when things get hard. I struggle to stay away from the pity party I often throw for myself, albeit internally. I hide my feelings from many people, and perhaps share too little to others and sometimes too much to some. As I woke up this morning sore from head to toe after putting up the new tent, I find myself struggling to walk around the house. The pain I feel in my back is more than just sore, different from the sore in my legs and arms. While it’s a challenge to get around the house today, the Lord blessed me with the opportunity to work hard, and do something for my family. The replacement for the tent I have lived in for nearly three years arrived and was in need of being put up. A fresh, brand-new tent with no patches, or holes, no leaks, and no extra rope required. I could focus on the fact I am sore and hurting today, or I could focus on the gift from God, for a place to live. No one said following Jesus was easy, and as we see in scripture, hardships come to all who follow God. All of the prophets in scripture had challenges to overcome, David and Solomon had their own challenges, Daniel and Elijah, had their challenges. Peter, Paul, Matthew, and the others had their challenges, and even death. Do we face hardships like Steven does in the book of Acts? Steven in the face of death by stoning said this, Acts 7:60  “Then he knelt down and cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep. (Died)” Steven in the last moments of his life, didn’t curse his killers, but asked forgiveness from God to them. It isn’t easy, but we are called to have faith, not just in good times, but in the inevitable hard times. Some people think when you turn to Jesus and you follow him, those hard times will go away, and everything will be great, if you just have enough faith, and tithe. The truth is, this is a false gospel, this is a lie from Satan, that when the hard time does come you walk away from God because it wasn’t as you envisioned. Faith is not easy, and following Christ is hard. There’s a reason it says in scripture to pick up your cross and follow me (Jesus). There’s a reason Jesus tells you there will be trouble in the world, but have faith because He overcame the world. All these things are promised to the believer, and most importantly we know that the path to destruction is wide, while the path to the kingdom of God is narrow, few will enter into it. The path of a Christian is full of hardships and tears, but how great is the Kingdom of eternity, compared to the little while of hardships in this life? 

Today is one more day to do better than the last. Today is a day to rejoice because it is a day the Lord made. We are beautifully and wonderfully made for a purpose and we must turn to God, not to ask why, but in thanks for what we have been given. We have been given life, and an opportunity to Grow closer to Him, to turn to the Father in our time of need, and praise Him in the storm. We know Jesus has the power to calm the storm, but we can’t always expect He will. What we can expect is that Jesus is there with us. Jesus will lead us to the mountain top, or beside peaceful streams, and still waters. Jesus will hold our tears, and comfort us when we are in pain. He will rejoice with us when we rejoice. We do not travel this world alone, and since life is but a vapor compared to eternity with the Father, we should be thankful for the good times, and prepare for battle during the hard times. Face the trials with bravery and courage. Get up each day we are allowed to get up and be thankful for it. No matter where we are, thank God for the opportunity to live our lives worshiping Him and allowing others around us to see God in us. 

God knows what we are going through. God sees our heartache and our hurt. I implore you to bring it all to the table. I beg you, if you are sorrowful, and sad, and angry, bring your weight before the alter, bring it all before a loving and understanding God and put your baggage down. You are accepted before the alter as you are and when you leave everything there, when you lay it all down, and when you surrender to the Lord you leave a different person. The battle is not yours to win, but has already been won by Jesus, our Savior. The battle belongs to Jesus, and while we struggle with life, a place is promised where that hurt, and sorrow doesn’t exist. The burden we carry is not for us, for we are called to trust in the Lord. Psalm 55:22 “Cast your burden on the Lord, And He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.” Trust in the Lord and surrender all. Do not carry your burdens alone, for you have been given a choice to trust in God, or try to do it on your own. When you cast your burdens upon the Lord, allow the Holy Spirit to come into your heart, and heal you, change you from the person dead in their sins, but reborn as a believer of Christ. Come as you are, leave changed. 

What Did Jesus Say? 

What Did Jesus Say? 

God doesn’t love you just the way you are. God loves you enough to give you a chance. We all face judgment because of the sin we are born in. God loved you enough to send his only Begotten Son to this filthy rotten earth, so you may have a choice, to follow or not, to trust or not, to submit or not, to Jesus’s authority God the Father has given Him. There is only one verse where scripture says God loves the world, John 3:16. What does scripture actually say? Repent. Repent because you are facing judgment. We are born into a world that comes with a choice, and that choice is to accept God, or not. Hell is not full of people who are repented and sorrowful after death, 

Matthew 8:12 But the sons of the kingdom will be cast out into outer darkness. There will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.” Meaning the sons of the kingdom (earth) those who follow the prince of the power of the air (Satan) will not find nor see Jesus, but instead will be cast into darkness, and there they will not weep from sorrow, and not cry out in regret, instead will be like Anakin Skywalker burning alive on the side of the lava flow. “I hate you!” he cried out to Obi-Wan. Scripture does not say God loves you the way you are. God loves you and wants a relationship with you, but you have to repent and turn from the world, and embrace his Son Jesus. Only then, are you given a new heart, born a new creation. 2 Corinthians 5:17 “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” Scripture doesn’t say we can remain in our sins. Scripture doesn’t say that as long as you’re happy in your sin you can keep it. Or to turn a phrase, “if you like your old sin you can keep it.” Scripture is clear, we are to murder our sin, turn away from our sin with all malice. If it was a sin 2000 years ago, it’s still a sin today. While this notion is not a culturally popular outlook, homosexuality is indeed a sin still today, as it was 2000+ years ago. Abortion is a sin. Steeling is a sin. Rape, murder, incest, are all still sins today. While these are the sins we know of, a recent video I saw said the first sin was the lie from Satan. While that is the first visible sin, I disagree, the first sin is pride. Pride the sin of self, is the sin that leads to the first lie. Pride is what leads Eve to eat the fruit from the Tree of Knowledge. Pride, the idea that we know more than God, that we can make better decisions than God, that we want what we want, and we will take what we want. In today’s fallen society, upside down society, indeed a mirror of the society found at the end of Judges 21:25 “In those days there was no king in Israel; everyone did what was right in his own eyes.” We live in a world full of subjective truth. Objective truth is vilified, and society today tells us to live our best life now. Tells us to live our truth, and do what makes us happy and feel good. 

Jesus doesn’t ever tell us to follow our heart. 

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself also in the Lord,

And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

Meaning, when you follow God he changes your heart, and gives you new desires that line up with God. 

Jeremiah 17:9 

“The heart is deceitful above all things,

And desperately wicked; Who can know it?

Of course Jesus doesn’t want us to follow our hearts, Jesus wants us to follow him. As Paul says no one is righteous, no not one, lest any man should boast. All men have fallen short of the Glory of God. 

Matthew 16:24 Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.

Jesus did not say live your truth, John 14:6 “Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.”

Jesus doesn’t say do what makes you happy, instead he said this: 

John 15:10-11 If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. 11 “These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full.

Joy comes from knowing the Lord. People these days are seeking joy and happiness in all the wrong places. People seek happiness in sex, drugs, people, stuff, money, all the things of this world, rather than God. Stuff and people pass away, they get old, the new wears off, and we are left seeking the next thing. True joy must be found in the Lord and only the Lord. 

Jesus never said believe in yourself. Instead he said this John 14:1 “Let not your heart be troubled; you believe in God, believe also in Me.” 

Again, we see the pride in our life. We see this abundance of pride everywhere in our lives. People elevate self-esteem as the utmost importance but really the important thing to remember is we are dead in our sins. We are wretched sinners, and it’s in that sin we find the truth. We find who we are in Christ, and Christ alone, and it’s there we find that all our works, our best days, our accomplishments are gifts from God, not our own. 

And finally Be true to yourself, instead Jesus says this

Luke 9:23-27

23 Then He said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me. 24 For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it. 25 For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and is himself destroyed or lost? 26 For whoever is ashamed of Me and My words, of him the Son of Man will be ashamed when He comes in His own glory, and in His Father’s, and of the holy angels. 27 But I tell you truly, there are some standing here who shall not taste death till they see the kingdom of God.”

We have entered into a scary time in History. A time in which like in times of ancient days, things seem upside down. We know that God sees all things, and knows all things, and is in control of all things. This is the type of time that Paul warns young Timothy about. A time in which men will gather up those who will entertain and tickle their ears. A time in which people will not adhere to sound doctrine. We live in a time where people do and say what they want for they fear not the Lord. We live in a time where wrong is called right and right is called wrong. We live in a time where the peacemakers are the villains and the villains are the heroes. 

We are about to go into an election, and I hear people say, ‘vote your conscience’. I hear people say Jesus would be a republican, or a democrat. If we are to call ourselves Christians, we have to accept scripture as truth. We have to know what it is scripture actually says, so we are not to be lied to, or misdirected. How do we follow Christ if we don’t know what He and His word actually says? How can we vote for a sinful politician that best represents what we believe, if we don’t know what our faith actually says? We are called to pray for our leaders, our governments, and we cannot expect the world to change through any political party or person. The world changes through Christ, or Satan, one or the other. Either we trust Christ and we follow him, and we find leaders who follow Him, or, Satan’s people will be in charge. As God allowed Israel to be given over to their own reprobate mind, so shall God allow the U.S. to do the same. If we are not going to follow Him, a time will come, if it hasn’t already, that the U.S. will fall to its own sinful desires. Things will either get better because God allows it to get better, having people who follow him, or it will get worse because Satan has been given control and people who follow Satan. Make no mistake, you don’t have to be a worshiper of Satan to follow Satan. Anyone who denies Christ the true Christ, are children of Adam, and to be a child of Adam is to be in Darkness, one who is born into Sin, and the Sin nature is that of pride and self. 

We cannot live our lives in a perpetual state of misquoting scripture, taking scripture out of context, and thinking one man or political party is going to save the world. We cannot expect our taxes will save the world. We cannot expect the giving up of rights and freedoms will somehow save the world. We cannot expect those of the world to have the same respect for life and conscience a Christian has. Those who are still ‘plugged in to the Matrix’, are perfectly happy in their ignorance, and of course we know ‘ignorance is bliss.’ (The Matrix) What we can do is share the love of Christ. Show others love in everything we do. Live the life Christ calls us to live and be that Ambassador He expects us to be. We cannot stand on our Christian faith if we ourselves do not know what it says. We cannot expect to hold others accountable if again, we don’t know what the WORD OF GOD SAYS! 

Do not follow your own heart, nor follow your own understanding. Do not seek your own truth, instead seek God’s truth. Seek the heart of God, and know his purpose for us, know his Truth, and follow His word. We may not always like what scripture says, but we are not a Holy and Righteous perfect God. Also, consider this, God is merciful and patient. Thank God for not giving us what we deserve. We often find ourselves upset that God does not give us the desires of our hearts right away, or at all, but often fail to recognize we don’t get what we deserve right away from God either. What we deserve is death, righteous punishment for being enemies of God. We did not deserve Jesus, but instead we received love and mercy. 

We must turn from our wicked sinful ways and repent. We must turn to Jesus and know His words. We must go forward in our lives not keeping one foot in righteousness and one foot in the world. We cannot be of two worlds. Know God, and follow Jesus, or reject Jesus and face the consequences for following Satan. Jesus loves you and He desires a relationship with you, but He will never force you into that relationship. He will not force you to Hell, you will walk through the gates of Hell of your own choices and be consumed by your own Pride. We do not follow Jesus for the benefits. We follow Jesus because He created the world, and this is all His. We follow Him because He is Holy and we are not. We follow Him not for the benefits of health and wealth in this world, but rather that we are servants for a Holy God. We must have the servant heart, and put others before ourselves. For what is it worth to have the whole of the world, but give up your soul in the process? Do not wait till you face the Lord Jesus in the afterlife, for if you wait that long, you have made your choice and will face the consequences of those choices. Choose to follow Jesus now, and know His Love, and warmth, and peace, and find true Joy.