What I Gave Away

What I Gave Away

All my life I wanted to be accepted by my friends. All my life I wanted to be liked by those around me. For whatever reason I have always had the need to fit in, I just never felt like I have. I spent the first part of my life being tortured in school being told I was ugly, that I looked like particular animals. I was laughed at for things that would happen to me, I was picked on for things that were traumatic in my home life, and no matter what I did I never found a way out. Eventually the teasing became physical. I was beat up after school, I was shoved around in school. I was given a swirley. My shoes were taken and thrown into urinals, and in the hallways my books where kicked around the hallways. When I liked a girl and people found out I was teased because she was so far out of my league everyone thought I was crazy. That’s when the mean tricks started. I was told that she actually thought I was cute and wanted to kiss me. Obviously they lied, and well, getting slapped across the face was a good clue I was lied to. Ever since then I have gone out of my way to get people to like me. Sadly, even as I got older and the place from which my actions came where honest and sincere, I would find that I was still not part of the ‘in’ crowd’. I would never truly be accepted, and I would find in time that I gave away parts of me that were my self esteem, my self worth, my heart, and my generosity would be taken advantage of time and time again. What I gave away was the best parts of me, just to all the wrong people.

To this day I haven’t quite found where I fit in. I feel like I’m a million miles from everyone in a crowded room. I feel like everyone’s moving all around me, talking to one another while I’m listening, watching, just entirely unsure of what to say. I never found how to interact with people. I never became someone anyone wanted to be around. I never found myself as accepted. I’ve always been a little different. I’ve always been a little nerdy. I’ve always been a little quirky, and sadly, it’s never gotten me anywhere. When I was in High School I often helped out as a counselor for my fellow classmates. I would give advice, and I would be an ear to listen, and in some cases I was a shoulder to cry on. Always a friend, never more, but on the rare occasion I was more, I wasn’t for long. I became the guy people would leave behind. When it came time to get married I never thought that I would be left behind again, but I was. I was cheated on, and lied to, and humiliated. I was displaced and forced to leave an entire country with nothing. I gave the best part of me and it was thrown away like used trash. Years later I would find myself loving another, and it seemed like that love was something special. After four years of marriage she would cheat, and again I was left wondering what I had done. I felt like I had given my everything and I felt as if I had been understanding, respectful, loving, caring, and yet it wasn’t good enough. I asked myself what I had done wrong? I blamed myself, and with all that anger, all that rage, I pointed it literally at myself. I poured every bit of blame into a tiny punch. The pain I felt was amplified by my anger at failure in my life. Every hurt I felt, every promise broken. Every loss I watched in front of me, death, and abandonment, all wrapped into the same moment. Years of abandonment, years of suffering, years of anger built up and at the center of it all I was the common denominator thus I was the one to blame. My value had been given to others to define. I allowed others to tell me if I was worth it or not. I gave away the very part of myself that is supposed to stay with you, knowing that you are a child of the one true King. You’ve been saved, changed and set free from bondage. Yet I would believe the lies I was told and I fell for the Devils schemes.

How do you come back from all of that? How do you change the years of behavior built into your personality? How do you rid yourself of years of heart, and conditioning? Sadly, I don’t have the answer for you. What I do have is a direction. You are a child of the Lord and the Lord doesn’t do anything by accident. You are not an accident. You are beautifully created for a purpose and we know that each of us has gifts, and a roll to play in the big picture. We all have our reason for being here and that we must trust in the big plan. We may experience the worst that humanity has to offer. We may undergo pain, and suffering on a regular basis, more then our fair share it seems, but perhaps we have suffered long for a reason. Maybe you can make the difference in a life.

Hard Love, By: Needtobreathe

Hold on tight a little longer
What don’t kill ya, makes ya stronger
Get back up, ’cause it’s a hard love
You can’t change without a fallout
It’s gon’ hurt, but don’t you slow down
Get back up, ’cause it’s a hard love

You know the situation can’t be right
And all you ever do is fight
But there’s a reason that the road is long
It takes some time to make your courage strong

 It’s not easy being an outcast, but at the foot of the cross we are all the same. When it comes to the cross the bullies who lived a cruel life will have to answer for that cruelty. We cannot let the world stain or harden our hearts. We must learn to give because we are pulled in our heart to do so. We must help because we want to. We must love live Christ loved. We must treat others fairly, and never loose sight of the love we were given that fateful day 2000 years ago. Christ sacrificed himself because of His love for us. We were never deserving of it, but we have it anyway. Those bullies in our lives don’t deserve it, but perhaps they are one step away from seeing the error of their ways and they turn around from the path they were on. We never know how our love and kindness will make an affect, and we must keep loving no matter how much it hurts. We can’t give up on this life. We cannot give up on our commandments, and once we realize that those who treated us that way cannot define who we are, then we may start to realize that power we gave away, we can actually take it back. For all those who’ve been bullied, and tortured, and beat up, and treated badly, you’re something special. You’ve endured hardships and yet you are still loving. Keep loving others, and keep giving, but more importantly, never stop loving yourself. Love others and help others because it’s the right thing to do. Do this knowing you will likely never get anything in return for it, and you may never see it come back to you, but we don’t love for the return, we love because it’s right. Stop giving away your value to others. Stop giving your happiness when others don’t deserve to have it. Psalm 146:3 “Put not your trust in princes, nor in the son of man, in whom there is no help.” Scripture is clear about putting our trust in people. Isaiah 2:22 “Stop regarding man in whose nostrils is breath, for of what account is he?” God is faithful and never lies, never breaks a promise, and forever bares the truth. Numbers 23:19 “God is not human, that he should lie, not a human being, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill?” The words of a man do not make them true. The cruel things someone says, even someone who claimed to love you isn’t necessarily the truth, so don’t allow the falsehoods spoken through a wicked tongue define you. It’s easier said then done of course, I myself haven’t gotten the hang of it, but the truth is the truth. Have faith in the word, and the word shall set you free.

 

 

 

 

Be The Light

Be The Light

Matthew 5:14-16 14 “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that[a] they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” On that night so many years ago a baby was born and broke the silence of hundreds of years. God sent a baby boy to bridge the gap between God and Sin. A perfect lamb, an innocent sacrifice with blood shed to may the price for all mankind. In return we are to live according to the commandments laid forth and in turn be the light lit to live in Christ’s image. We will never be Christ, but in our everyday life, in our actions, in our love for one another we should stand out in the crowd as something different, something special.

In this Christmas season shine brightly in the darkness of winter. Be so different from others that people will know you are walking with Christ. John 8:12 Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.” In this time of Christmas we have time to rejoice and celebrate the birth of the only reason we have to rejoice. Rejoice by being happy and offer adulation for the prince of peace because He deserves more then we can ever offer.

Hark The Herald Angel Sing

Hark the herald angels sing
“Glory to the newborn King!
Peace on earth and mercy mild
God and sinners reconciled”
Joyful, all ye nations rise
Join the triumph of the skies
With the angelic host proclaim:
“Christ is born in Bethlehem”
Hark! The herald angels sing
“Glory to the newborn King!”

 There are so many beautiful songs that we sing during this time of year, but most are just seen in passing. When we look deeper, feel more closely to the words we would find so much truth and joy in it. On the day the child of the King was born the Angels broke heaven and sang praises and joy. Luke 2:13-14 13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, 14 “Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!” We to must rejoice for the greatest birthday of all eternity.

No matter the dark, dismal, whole you may find yourself, the light will always shine brightly. The Devil will try and try to darken your days. The Devil will pull people away from you. The Devil will hurt you, curse you, and destroy everything you have, all in the attempt to pull you away from Jesus. When we are in our darkest hour we shall fear no evil for the Lord on high is always with us. We must have and keep the faith that in all things, good and bad, big and small, God is in control and his plans for us are beautiful, not ugly. So Merry Christmas and above all Happy Birthday to the savior of our lives.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Can you hear with that hood?

Can you hear with that hood?

Life can be loud at times, and when the storms raging on it’s sometimes hard to hear the voice of God speaking to us. As I roam around the house especially in the fall and winter, I’m usually wearing a hoodie. Not much different then wearing the green hood, I like the way it feels, and I like wearing the hood. Not much different then my love of capes and cloaks, but it would look weird wearing a cape and a hood at the same time. Except for Damian Wayne, Bruce Wayne’s son. The point is, when I wear the cape, I loose just a slight amount of hearing capability. It’s so important to keep your ear to the ground and focus on the signs given to us by God. Abba (Father) gives us signs every day. He will talk to us it’s just a matter if we’re listening, if we’re paying attention.

When we’re living life it’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of the world. Psalms 25:4-5 “Shew me thy ways, O LORD; teach me thy paths. Lead me in thy truth, and teach me: for thou [art] the God of my salvation; on thee do I wait all the day.” We must remain faithful even when we cannot see tomorrow. Quiet the noise and listen to the voice meant to guide you.

Praise you in this storm By; Casting Crowns

I was sure by now, God you would have reached down
And wiped our tears away,
Stepped in and saved the day.
But once again, I say amen
That it’s still raining
As the thunder rolls
I barely hear your whisper through the rain
I’m with you
And as your mercy falls
I raise my hands and praise
The God who gives and takes away

And I’ll praise you in this storm
And I will lift my hands
That you are who you are
No matter where I am
And every tear I’ve cried
You hold in your hand
You never left my side
And though my heart is torn
I will praise you in this storm

IMG_3762

Every day you should find a quiet place where you can reflect and listen to the voice inside you. Pray to God and ask for your troubles to go however fit to the Lord. Praise your Father on high and trust in the storm you will make it through. Take off the hood, step away from the noise, the struggles of the world for just a moment, and listen. Learn to quiet your mind and find the faith to carry on.

 

Bright Tomorrow?

Bright Tomorrow?

The darkness fills the room. The lights go out and blindness is the word of the night. How we cannot see when the darkness is all around us. When choices weigh you down, and you can’t seem to lift your head off the pillow it’s so heavy like a pile of bricks. The darkness spreads, it’s an evil entity with a mind of it’s own. It follows you, it stalks you, it hunts you in the light of day, and in the darkness of night. The shadows weigh you down, and if it catches you, it may very well crush you.

When you run from the darkness where are you running? What are you running from? We all have our shadows, and we all have the darkness inside us. It’s fear, and doubt, it’s the bad traumas we face, and it’s the hopeless nights that haunt us. We feel the weights pile on, and we watch as the weight on our shoulders weighs us down dragging our shoulders to the ground. The literal weight of our own cross drags us to the ground and if we aren’t careful it’ll crush us into the dirt. Have no fear though, there’s hope just on the horizon.

1 Corinthians 9:26 “So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air.” How do we fight the darkness? We must remember that the darkness are the lies and the self flagellants we push upon ourselves. The Devil wants to use our fears and doubts against us. The Devil wants us to struggle with our past mistakes and our past failings. We know that the world isn’t a fair or kind place, but when it feels like more then you can hold, you know who to call, and no not the Ghostbusters.

When the world is more then you can take you gotta call upon the one and only strong enough to get you through, Jesus Christ. Christ will carry you through, Christ will left you and protect you. We have our trials, we have our hurdles we may face, but no matter what it is, it’s never to big for God. Give us strength oh Lord of all to help us through. I don’t have to be strong enough because I am never alone. Christ gives me strength to push away the demons who attack my weaknesses, Christ gives me strength to light up the darkness and make the enemy of the night flee before the light of the cross.

Heavens mercy upon us is strength for this world, it’s hope, and it’s a way to push beyond the fear. We can always count on the Lord to be with us. We can always hope and pray for the best, but we know the fight will come, and we must always be ready. We can’t let our past weigh us down. We can’t allow our pain to forge our future. We must learn to embrace the pain, and use it for a better tomorrow. We draw a line in the sand and we choose to fight. How can we fight if we are weighed down with our own fears and doubts? The world is hard enough to face, let alone face it when we are over encumbered. The Devil wants us to go to war with the fear and doubts, the pain, the hatred we hold in our hearts. How can we share the light if our own light is subdued by the stained hearts we have? The fact is, is you’re going to stand you need to go toe to toe with the darkness. There’s only room enough for one of you in this world, and it’s either the one that embraces the light to forge ones self in the fire, or those who embrace the darkness and forever lives in the shadows of misery. You can’t forge steel without the flame, so who are you going to be? Are you going to be the one to fall on your face and stay down, or are you going to embrace that fire, and fight the Devil? You need to realize you’re more then the bad decisions, you’re more then the pain, you’re more then the lies the devil tries to spread. You need to have the faith that allowed the clouds to part, the giants to fall, the seas to split, and the sins of the world to break the temple in half. Don’t be afraid of the darkness because with God anything’s possible. The fight is coming no matter what we may want. You have to learn to be ready for it, and when it comes know how to fight back. Trust in God and believe in the impossible. God doesn’t just have the big stuff, but the small details too. Don’t let the darkness scare you because if you are walking with the Lord you aren’t in the darkness. It may creep up on you, but stand firm on the heels of Christ and you can defeat the Devil when the battle knocks on your door.

 

What Would You Give Up?

What Would You Give Up?

When all you want is all you can’t have, what would you give up? I was thinking of a song not to long ago by Tim McGraw : Don’t Take The Girl. When we live our lives we often feel like if we could just have one thing, just that one special thing it would change our life forever, and we’d never ask for anything big again? During the boy’s life in the song it starts off with a girl going fishing, and in his youth he doesn’t want the girl to tag along. He’s older and asks the girl to marry him and they get mugged. He begs the man not to take the girl. He offers his possessions in the hopes he can keep her from harm. Later she’s giving birth and complications arise and he begs God not to take the girl, he pleads with God to take him instead. Have you ever been in a place like that? Have you ever pleaded for something so strongly you’d be willing to trade places to protect someone from harm?

John 15:13 “Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” Have you ever loved someone so much you were willing to give your all for them, to protect them? Think about what it means to give up everything for someone. Think of what it means to make the ultimate sacrifice? Jesus Christ did that for us. He gave up his life to save ours. He suffered at the hands of the wicked, and his innocent bloodshed paved the way for our eternal salvation.

A love that would last a lifetime is a rare thing. A love that would wade through the mud and the muck, that would suffer long, and be patient and wait through the craziness of this world. Loving someone isn’t easy and sometimes that love in itself can cause pain, but through the pain can be something wonderful, something hopeful. Having the patience and the security to manage isn’t always an easy thing to do. Sometimes we must take a leap of faith in order to see what the world may offer. Sometimes for the one chance at the spark of love we must give up ourselves in order strike the match. It all boils down to faith. Do you have it, or do you need it? Either way in anything we encounter in our lives we must have faith to see the path through the darkness, and only in that faith can we finally, and fully see the light of true hope.

Cha Cha Cha Changes

Cha Cha Cha Changes

Well, now I have no idea what I’m going to do. The future looks like it’s going to be changing, and I see that it’s likely I’ll be kind of like that guy in a barrel about to go over the lip of the waterfall at Niagara Falls. Big changes come sometimes, and we aren’t always prepared for them. We don’t always know where the changes will take us, and we can’t always prepare for it. The changes that come raises the pressure, so our lives are someplace between Changes by David Bowie, and Pressure by Queen, “Turn to face the change” and “Pressure pushing down on me
Pressing down on you no man ask for, Under pressure that brings a building down, Splits a family in two, Puts people on streets”
Life is full of change, and no matter how much we fight against it we just can’t seem to stop the raging river from doing what it wants. Time is that river of course and all way can do is lay back and enjoy the rapids.

While the future has been in a constant state of change with no set direction, nor has there been any resemblance that things are going to be calming down anytime soon, all I can do is sit back and pray. I am sitting around ready to go at a moments notice like the quick reaction force I used to be in Iraq. With major changes to the plan yet again, I haven’t the slightest clue where I’m going, or what I’m doing. With uncertainty the new catchphrase for my life, I’d say it’s back to the drawing board.

Proverbs 16:1-3 “The plans of the heart belong to man, but the answer of the tongue is from the Lord. All the ways of a man are pure in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the spirit. Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” We plan what we want, what we think is best, but as our field of view is limited so we will never see the big picture. We must have faith that just because we may not have the slightest clue what we’re doing, God knows. As long as we are living our life in a Godly way, we can have faith that although the future may not be what we have planned, God’s still with us, God’s still on the throne, and we need to remain faithful and patient.

I remember when I was in Iraq we would sit around the house, we’d be cleaning equipment, playing games, watching movies, or catching up on some sleep. We waited around, waiting for the call that there was a mission. When that mission came we were ready within minutes to go into the unknown. We had a direction, but no idea what we were going to face. We responded to anything and everything to include IED’s (improvised explosive devices), suicide bombers, attacks, escorts, incoming fire locations, or outgoing fire locations. We were always flexible to the point some days we’d have several back to back missions, and often skipped meals for them. I don’t know what changed but I feel as if complacency has attacked me in my sleep. As I think back to what I call my glory days, I find myself longing for a time when I felt like I was making a physical difference in others lives. My teammates, my brothers depended on me to do my job. Now no one depends on me for anything. Reeling from the loss my my wife last year I find myself hoping I once again find someone to fill that void left in my life. I feel like I’m ready and I feel as if I’m sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for the next mission. I may not know when it’s going to come, but I know I have to be ready at a moments notice. So, here I am, ready for the changes, hopeful for the future, and ready for my next adventure.

 

 

The Empathy Within

The Empathy Within

How do you feel when you see the suffering of others? What does your heart do when you see on TV the faces of the children drinking from dirty puddles? How do you feel when you see the animals that have been abused and tortured? Where’s your heart at? When someone gives you their problems do you raise them up or shoot them down? When someone is hurting and it’s not their fault do you try to help or do you push away? I say again, where’s your heart?

The day may bring great joy and you may be in the season of peace, of happiness, a life without strife, without pain, and without much worry of any kind. The curtain can be drawn back to reveal the truth, the man behind the curtain as it were. When the going gets tough do your friends stick by you and help you through or are you left in the road beaten and dirty? You see the truth is many of us don’t stop to help the beaten traveler on the road. Many of us turn away, looking someplace else because it quite frankly it isn’t my concern. In a blog I wrote a while back I talked about how many people are fair-weather fans. I’ve written about the Good Samaritan and the man under the hood, but what do they all have in common? Empathy, or simply put, the lack thereof, and it’s a lesson I’ve learned the hard way this last year. So few people have empathy for others, and I believe the route of the problem is a lack of love for your fellow man.

When friends abandon you because you’re going through a hardship is that a sign of the level of their love? What about when a marriage falls apart because there’s a rough patch? If we loved more deeply, and allowed ourselves to actually feel the pain of others, we might be less inclined to abandon ship at the first sign of water.

 

Your Love, by Brandon Heath

But your love
Your love
The only the thing that matters is your love
Your love is all I have to give
Your love is enough to light up the darkness
It’s your love
Your love
All I ever needed is your love

 

Give Me Your Eyes, Brandon Heath

Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see,
Everything that I keep missing,
Give your love for humanity.
Give me your arms for the broken-hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach.
Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten.
Give me Your eyes so I can see.

 

When we look at the people around us we gloss over them and we don’t see the truth. We as a people, as a society have lost our ability for a lot of reason to see the pain underneath the surface. Men in our time hold onto the pain they feel, the suffering, the shame, or guilt of their actions. Women have lost the nurturing side of who they where. Where’s the love, where’s the empathy we are supposed to have?

Christ felt deeply for the sick, the lame, the poor, and the hungry. Christ went to great lengths to feel their pain, to ease their suffering. Christ performed miracles almost always for the betterment of those who needed it most. He could feel the pain, he could feel the suffering, and he had empathy for their situation. The Lord loves us, and as we suffer in our situation know the Lord is with us always. While people may fail you, Christ won’t. 1 Thessalonians 5:11Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” You and I, the human race must remember to find what we’ve lost and that’s love. It isn’t just enough to see the suffering of others we must feel the suffering of others. Romans 12:15 “Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.” We must serve the Lord and when we do that we must be able to see the world as Christ sees the world. The Lord of all see and feels all things. If you are a person who things you are above helping someone, above feeling empathy for those who have less then you, I say shame on you. Galatians 6:2-3 “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself.”

 We are nothing without Christ’s love so why do we not share that love with others? Why are we so consumed with our own petty selves? Without the grace of God we would have nothing, and when we abandon those we supposedly love what does that say about our true nature? When we turn our backs, abandon them because their ‘negativity’ is ‘too much’ to handle. Shame on you, if that’s something you’ve done. When you abandon someone in need I would surmise you are actually sinning. I believe when you turn your head the other way and you allow the suffering of others to happen within your attention you do not love your neighbor as you are commanded too.

Just remember one thing, when you forsake a friendship and you abandon them to face their sorrows alone, the day will come when you yourself are in need. Who then will help you when you found it too inconveniencing to be there for them? Empathy is about having love for your fellow human beings, and one day you might just need a friend. Sure it’s easy to be someone’s friend when everything is fine, but when the going gets tough, don’t just hop the next flight out of town just because you can’t be bothered with it. That’s entirely selfish and ridiculous. If you’re going to call someone a friend, and if you’re going to tell them you love them, then prove it when it matters most.

 

 

 

 

Reach for the Golden Ring

Reach for the Golden Ring

Our life is full of choices and full of chances. We cannot live in regret because we may only get to ride the ride once. If you’re going to live life you cannot just flounder around in the waves. There’s a golden ring up there for everyone. There’s greatness at the fingertips of everyone, the problem is we don’t allow ourselves to pursue or reach our full potential. Greatness is all about taking chances, it’s all about the risks and making sure we take the right ones. Not every risk will pay off, but we cannot reach our full potential unless we jump.

No matter how far you have to run, never stop reaching for that golden ring. Van Halen said it best:

DREAMS

World turns black and white
Pictures in an empty room
Your love starts fallin down
Better change your tune
Reach for the golden ring
Reach for the sky
Baby just spread your wings

[Chorus:]
We’ll get higher and higher straight up we’ll climb
We’ll get higher and higher leave it all behind
Run, run, run, away
Like a train runnin off the track
The truth gets left behind
And falls between the cracks
Standing on broken dreams
But never losing sight
Spread your wings

[Chorus]

So baby dry your eyes, save all the tears you’ve cried
Ohh that’s what dreams are made of
Oh baby we belong in a world that must be strong
Ohh that’s what dreams are made of

 

People will tell you you’re not good enough. They will tell you, all kinds of things, like not smart enough, not tall enough, not pretty enough, you don’t sound the part, but in every instance of being told no, make sure you are listening to the path from God. Allow the Holy Spirit to guide you using your God given talent. You will be told no a lot before you finally hear that yes. Don’t loose hope in yourself. Keep pushing and keep making yourself better. You never know what the world will hold when you push through the opposition to realize your true potential. While we all have our special gifts, and while greatness is measured by history do not mistake my meaning. Greatness isn’t fame and fortune. While some will reach that, and while it’s some peoples dreams to do so, what’s important is the legacy you leave behind. How are the lives touched around you? Does your life lift people up, does it help others when they are in need, or are you always beating people down? What kind of leader are you? Do you lead from the desk while everyone else slaves around you? Do you lead from the front, by showing and doing? Be great at whatever you do. Don’t ever quit reaching for your dreams. The path wont be easy and you’ll stumble and fall, but get back up, lick your wounds, and when you push and you follow your dreams you can be great, even if it’s just to the people around you.

You have to be ready to leap and pull your shoot. When you live your life you might only get a few moments to make a name for yourself. You may only get that one shot, one shot in any given lifetime, so you need to make sure when you have your chance you bring everything you have to offer. Don’t stop and even if you fall, even if you don’t succeed get back up. Boxers get knocked down, singers get booed off stage, actors are passed over for movies, but when that one time comes up you better bring everything. Always be the best you can be and never doubt yourself. No matter what your gift is, singing, writing, dancing, an instrument, photography, being a parent, being a supervisor, saving lives, going to war, no matter what it is follow the path and never give up.

Lose Yourself by Eminem

Look
If you had

One shot

Or one opportunity

To seize everything you ever wanted

In one moment

Would you capture

Or just let it slip?

 Your dreams my break, and your hopes may get crushed but always remember scripture. Proverbs 16:3 “Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established.” When your dreams are in line with serving God, bringing honor and glory to the King of Kings, you won’t fail. While in our path to achieve our goals we will face tribulations. Romans 12:12 “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.” No matter the path we must remember to always put God first in all we do. Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” It’s in this that we truly receive the blessings from above. When we realize that all things come from God, we will be more grateful for the blessings we have. Never forget the blessings, and give the praise to where it comes from. No matter the trials we may face, that is only to build strength, to test fortitude, to bring glory and preparation.

Hard Love by NeedtoBreathe

Hold on tight a little longer
What don’t kill ya, makes ya stronger
Get back up, ’cause it’s a hard love
You can’t change without a fallout
It’s gon’ hurt, but don’t you slow down
Get back up, ’cause it’s a hard love
You know the situation can’t be right
And all you ever do is fight
But there’s a reason that the road is long
It takes some time to make your courage strong

 

We cannot move forward until we are ready, and sometimes the hardships are just that, tests to make sure we can handle the next phase. While hardships we face might be the Devils doing we have our choice on how we manage setbacks. Remember to always spread your wings and remember you cannot sore above the clouds till you’ve first fallen to the ground. Hope and pray, find yourself, and be ready to use your gift, reach high, and never stop, reach for that Golden Ring and paradise awaits you.

 

 

 

 

My What Big Eyes You Have

My What Big Eyes You Have

Matthew 7:15-20 15 Beware of false prophets, which come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ravening wolves. 16 Ye shall know them by their fruits. Do men gather grapes of thorns, or figs of thistles? 17 Even so every good tree bringeth forth good fruit; but a corrupt tree bringeth forth evil fruit. 18 A good tree cannot bring forth evil fruit, neither can a corrupt tree bring forth good fruit. 19 Every tree that bringeth not forth good fruit is hewn down, and cast into the fire. 20 Wherefore by their fruits ye shall know them.”

When I was a young boy I thought my life was normal. Then I started to open my eyes to the world around me. I looked at the families of my friends, I looked at the kids at school and I realized my life was far from average. As I got older I found I was disconnected from the world around me. The world as it was didn’t seem to accept me for who I was. The bullying started and soon it was more then just name calling and teasing it became physical. My shoes would be taken in gym and tossed around, my stuff would be knocked to the floor, I’d be pushed around when nobody was watching and no one ever came to my rescue. The day I received a swirly was one of the worst and most shameful moments of my life. I didn’t want the world to see me anymore. If all of that wasn’t bad enough, the following school year my mother was involved in a serious incident. It wasn’t long before the cat was out of the bag, and mean kids became cruel and from then on the words were that of physiological warfare….. Torture. When the school bullies learned of what happened I became the punch line and it was clear I wasn’t ever going to fit in. I drew into myself. I tried to put on a smile, but it was fake. No one knew the pain, and even the school counselors did nothing. Twice I was punished for fighting back when I was pushed or shoved into the lockers, or when someone said just the right thing knowing after 3 years how to push my buttons. Every day I thought about my life and how much I wanted the world to end. Every day I cried wishing my life would end and the pain would stop. I wasn’t normal, I wasn’t special, I was nothing in the world. The idea of life’s meaning was brought up more then once in my internal monolog. Would the world have been better without me? Since no one wanted me, I was an anomaly that there was no answer too.

I wandered through life lost, and confused about who I was. I felt the Devils claws digging into my heart and squeezing the joy from my chest as if I were some fruit trying to get juice. The thoughts in my head kept telling me, there’s a better way, better days for the winds to lift us on eagles wings and we would find better ways to look into the storm and stand tall against the Devil and his minions of death. Would moving make things better? Would a change make things better? From the ages of 10 to 16 I moved around a few times trying to find where I belonged, each time feeling as if I were betraying someone. Every time I left I struggled with my decision. A foolish sense of loyalty remained in my heart and caused doubt with each passing day. The joy would only be temporary and the guilt would set in like a sticky fog and I couldn’t outrun it.

The life I wanted would come with my final move. A school I could find myself in, friends I would grow to depend on, the occasional girlfriend, and an abundance of success. Finally for the first time in my life I found a sense of peace, a sense that the world wasn’t all out to get me. While every life has its setbacks, every heart has its heartbreak, and every day must bring forth it’s night, the truth was I was home. Three years I lived that life, and three years I found my happiness. When the day came to graduate I knew life wasn’t going to play by the rules anymore. I knew the protection we teenagers had would eventually fall away. It’s that false sense of security that’s so important to notice.

I sit alone and listen to the words of the music from my computer. We see through our eyes of perspective, but narrow and pointed. How we don’t see the truth, how we never think to walk a mile in their shoes. What would it be like to walk in someone’s shoes? Would we ever see the pain they hide behind their eyes? Would we feel what they feel? What’s it like to feel the pain of someone else? What’s it like to feel the judgments we deal out? What’s it like to be on the receiving end of our harsh words and our snap judgments? What is it like to be at the top and still feel like you’re at the bottom? When we receive our gifts in life do we look at them objectively, or do we allow our narrow field of view to blind us? Is it a gift or a curse? Are the gifts we embrace truly gifts or are they wolves in sheep’s clothing?

While in my life I’ve loved deeply, that love has come with a cost. I have lost the women in my life I was closest too. I have loved and lost more then many, but still less then others. My life has had its share of pain and suffering, but was it because of my inability to see the true nature of what I had? What may appear to be a wonderful gift from God might truly be a curse. The truth hurts and nothing hurts like the betrayal of the people we love most. Best friends will leave you, loved ones will forsake you, the words that are uttered will cut most deeply. The Devil will try to get to you using any means possible. The Devil will break through and turn your friends against you. The Devil will draw your spouse away and in that the wolves are everywhere. The Devil takes no prisoners and doesn’t care at the cost, the collateral damage left in the wake of destruction. I spent so much of my life hanging low, picking up the pieces from the ground trying to put my life back together over and over again.

The truth is however you can’t rebuild using the rubble of your life; you must first clear away the destruction to make room for the new. You must remove the old and damaged pieces and look to the future, look to the sky for the chances to rebuild stronger and better then it was before. Looking at the destruction of our lives is easy to do, but when the storm blows through and the light shines through, clear the old and make room for the new. You can’t build a house on top of the old one. You can’t let the destruction of the old get in the way of the possibilities. Furthermore, you cannot look at every gift with suspicion. You must have faith in God and the blessings bestowed upon you. As I have said in the past trust but verify. Look at the gifts and be thankful for what you have.

Even as the wolf lays in the bed waiting to gobble you up, wearing a grandma suit trying to trick you, you cannot allow for the sin of others to affect you and take away your joy. Christ died for us, his blood spilt to give us the joy of salvation. No matter what people say or do, that will never define the purpose God has for you. Believe in yourself no matter what the devil throws in your path. Life will hurt you, the Devil will beat you, and the world you love so much, the life you’ve built will crumble around you and you will be powerless to stop it. No matter the storm stand strong, stand tall. Fight back against the wolves sent to pull you down, pull you away from Christ. Fight back and don’t allow the Devil to stop you from moving forward. You can never hit a home run if you’re too afraid to swing. You cannot allow the Devil to pull you away from salvation. Believe in yourself and live your life with Love, Kindness, and Compassion for your fellow man. Trust in the word and love.

It’s hard to love after major disasters. It’s hard to have faith in tomorrow when your standing in the middle of destruction but as Christ forced the very clouds upon the water to part, the winds to vanish, and the sun to shine, your life is only a matter of time and prayer. Prayers for help, pray for guidance, and pray for strength to persevere. Love is about having faith; it’s about pushing and believing in God, believing in yourself, and trying to always see the best in the people in your life. Life can be rebuilt for as long as you draw breath there is always hope. As long as you believe the world turns, the sunrises and sets and with every day a chance to change, a chance to paint a new canvas with your own story, you can be exactly the person God knows you can be. Do you believe in life after love? When you don’t think you’re strong enough, fall to your knees and you will be blessed. We are strong enough as long as we have Christ with us and by our side. Never quit and never allow the wolf to take from you that, which is most precious, your faith in Christ.

The Power of Love

The Power of Love

How does someone love through the pain? How does someone love through the betrayals? How does someone love after torture? How does someone love after immeasurable loss? How can someone endure so much, and still manage to see the sun rise and get up and continue walking? The cruelty of the world can beat us down like a prizefighter, one blow after another and when we hit the mat it’s easy to want to stay down and not get punched in the face again. The grace of God was given to man despite the torture, the ridicule, the murder of eternity. No matter what horrible things we’ve done as a society, the war, the slavery, the racism, the most important thing to remember is the truest of truths and that’s the power of love.

I was talking to someone once who had undergone an enormous amount of pain, she was raped, and she struggled with feeling safe and normal again. The key I told her was forgiveness. She asked me how I could forgive so many for the pain they had done to me, and my response was simple. Luke 23:34 “And Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” And they cast lots to divide his garments.” We must remember that even after torture, and being hung on the cross, Christ new forgiveness was routed in love. That love supersedes all. We could never do enough to overcome our own sin. We could never do enough works to bribe our way into heaven. But through love we have been given the blessings of such, and the forgiveness to go along with it. Our forgiveness to others must come from our hearts. Forgiveness is never something someone can earn, never something they have to work towards. Forgiveness is about correcting the balance within ones self. If we are not just made to forgive those whom we know, it’s ever more important to know that love is not exclusive. Luke 6:35 “35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked.” Even our greatest foe, our worst nightmare, the worst mankind has to offer must be loved.

When you are in love with someone, and your heart aches for them, when the time apart from them seems like an eternity, when just the sound of their voice, the flutter within your own heart at the text that comes from them, the smile you get from ear to ear is infectious. The joys of being in love with someone, and how the worry of the world fades away. One cannot be blinded by love in mistake for lust or infatuation, however the true art of loving someone beyond that will bring absolute beauty to ones life. The greatest thing we can feel in our life is love.

Jude 22-23 22 And have mercy on those who doubt; 23 save others by snatching them out of the fire; to others show mercy with fear, hating even the garment[a] stained by the flesh.” The sins we make are because of our sin nature. The draw of the Devil pulling us to loose control and focus on our deepest desires even if they are despicable to what is right and wrong. We must love even the sinner, even the worst of the sinners. This isn’t an easy charge, but to love our neighbors isn’t just a suggestion, it’s a commandment. Matthew 22:36-4036 “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” 37 And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. 38 This is the great and first commandment. 39 And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself. 40 On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets.”

 It’s never easy to do, but when we are hurt and our pain is eating us from the inside out, the pain we have, the sorrow that stains our heart, we must learn that love is the cure. Loving must come from within. Romans 12:9 9 Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good.” In order for us to find peace, and to be at rest even in the hardest of times, we must learn to focus our thoughts on love. 1 Peter 4:8 8 Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” No matter what the event, whether it’s murder, it’s rape, or war, or terrorism, or thievery, or just getting cut off in traffic, no matter what it is, forgiveness must start from within.

Christ set us free with love, and we must learn also to set ourselves free. We can’t just forgive those who harm us, but when we make mistakes, when we wrong others, we must first attempt to apologize and repent meaning make actual steps to right the wrongs we have done. We must also learn to forgive ourselves. We must learn to be at peace with our sinful mistake, and do all we can to make it right. We may not be granted forgiveness from those whom we hurt, but that’s between them and God. All we can ever do is attempt to repent for our mistake and hope it’s enough. If it’s not enough for the flesh, we must as the bigger question, was it enough to God’s standards? We have no one to please on this earth, only God is the judge that matters. While forgiving others may be easy for some, the forgiving of ones own faults and sins may be the hardest thing anyone ever does. Remember that God loves you no matter what, and that power of love is strong enough to overcome any obstacle. Love is strong enough to overcome hurtful words, hurtful actions, and hurtful beliefs. Not everyone will love the way they should, not everyone will love and be able to hold onto that love, but Love is still the greatest of all, and no matter what ‘people’ say, Love is the greatest of commandments. Again to use the motto of Hard Rock Café’ Love All, Serve All. In the words of Celine Dion:

We’re heading for something
Somewhere I’ve never been
Sometimes I am frightened
But I’m ready to learn
(‘Bout) Of the power of love