Tag: love

5.56

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5.56

 5.56 is the size of the bullet used in both the AR-15 semi automatic rifle and the M-16, M4, military service rifle. A rifle that is semi automatic with single shot capability is not an assault weapon, it’s merely a rifle. The Assault weapon is defined by more then a single bullet per squeeze of the trigger. Full Auto weapons are not easily purchased and it takes a special federal stamp to do so. Though not incredibly difficult to do, it is impossible without the machinery and know how, the alteration when done with this particular weapon can shoot full auto, it can also hold up to a 100 round drum. The 5.56 is currently known to be the most popular rifle in America and leading rifle in home defense, though not considered to be a very good hunting rile. Sadly this is also the number 1 rifle used in mass shootings, just like the mass shooting that occurred in Las Vegas recently.

At approximately 2208 on October 1st of 2017 shots rang out at a concert in Vegas. 5.56mm rifles were used, .308 rifles were used, and possibly others that have not been released yet. It’s easy to want to respond with hateful rhetoric. It’s easy to attack a certain group of our society, gun owners, or even a political side. It’s easy to allow hate an anger to run wild during times of tragedy. We must remember to love, and to spread that love. Placing blame and getting angry doesn’t help anyone during these hard times.

Ephesians 4:17-19 “Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds. 18 They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart. 19 They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity.” We are all sinners, and those who have rebuked or denied Christ are more in the dark then the rest of us. While this is hard to understand sometimes that darkness will lead people down a path of hate and destruction. In every tragedy there is also opportunity, opportunity to show love, to shower the grieving with the word of God and show the grieving that there is light at the end of their pain.

Politicians will often use these tragedies to attempt to expand on their own personal agendas. While law enforcement is trying to put the pieces together, politicians are licking their chops and the plotting and planning begins. We must not allow the tragedies of this world to be exploited for personal gains or interest. We must instead fall onto scripture to help guide us in our grief. Psalm 34:18 “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”

We won’t always understand how someone can be so evil in life, and do so much harm to others. We don’t always understand why innocent people can be caught up in such evil on earth. No matter what we may feel or the questions we may have, know that God is always on the throne. Bad things happen because of sin. God’s heart breaks in such tragedy. We don’t know what God has planned, but we must have faith that God’s plan even if it seems horrible to us, is still perfect. Our hearts may break, our tears will flow, and our dreams be crushed, but God’s perfect plan will happen with our without our consent.

I myself once owned at 5.56mm rifle and I considered it one of my prized possessions. I believe fully in a persons right to choose a weapon to protect their own home, to shoot for fun, to hunt with. While this is a tragedy, and the pieces will be placed together to see the full picture, the debate will once again be raised on gun rights vs. gun control. The point I will leave is, people are evil, cruel, and sinful, and when a person wants to do others harm there will always be a way. No matter the means, no matter if it’s guns, explosives, knives, using motor vehicles, people will harm others to achieve their sick demented ends. The only way to snuff out darkness is by spreading the light. Jesus Christ is the only light we can ever depend on.

 

 

 

 

Jumping into the unknown

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Jumping into the unknown

 In a matter of weeks I will embark on an adventure all on my own. In the last year of my life I’ve suffered loss, and some joy along the way. While in every adventure there can be no growth without setbacks. While the journey is far from over it seems glimmers of light can now be seen at the end of a yearlong journey. The light I see at the end of the tunnel isn’t the headlamp of a fast approaching train. It’s finally come and while I know there will be future setbacks I’m prepared to face them head on.

In the last few weeks I’ve faced major opposition from the Veterans Administration and have had to point out gross negligence on their part. This battle has come at the cusp of my life finally being set on a particular track in a particular direction. This set back has minimized my ability to get my train up to full speed. Sadly while this causes undo stress, and might I point out needless stress, I will continue to try and face it with respect and dignity.

We may only get an opportunity once in a lifetime to leap. I’m not saying leap without looking, of course not, but sometime you need to take a leap of faith, and that leap may not always be with sight we understand. Sometimes we just don’t know what’s just around the bed, or just over the side of the next cliff. How can the eagles soar above the clouds if it doesn’t first take the leap? When we love we must first fall, a leap to let a part of ourselves go to allow for someone else to come in. When we love Jesus we must allow a part of our self to be burned away to make room for the light of the world. Loving another person is taking a chance. Rejection in life is always a possibility. Rejection from those whom we love is possibly the most hurtful thing we can ever endure. The fear of that rejection however, the fear of failure, cannot be the reason we don’t try. What if we allow ourselves to be ruled by our fear? What happens to our life, our happiness when we don’t allow ourselves to feel happy?

Genesis 2:18 “And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” We aren’t meant to be in this world alone. We aren’t meant to take the journey solo. We are made to be creatures that desire and need others. While some people are loners and some may desire their solitude that’s not the general idea for the human race. We often hide away after we are hurt, but we cannot live in the cave we’ve built forever. Even when we are broken hearted we must allow the Lord to rebuild us, to help us heal. Psalms 34:18 “The LORD [is] nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.” When the right person comes along falling in love will be effortless, it will be like slipping into a warm bath. It will be like being wrapped in joy itself. The euphoria that comes with the act of falling in love is spectacular.

Sometimes we are forced to move, forced to change and we must be ready to embrace that change. Sometimes we must take a leap of faith and the trust comes later. I was watching the “Man of Steel” and while Clark was debating on his decision, he talked with a priest. During that conversation Clark stated he wasn’t sure if he could trust mankind. The priest replied that sometimes you have to take a leap of faith and trust later. Sometimes we must take the deep breath and dive into the deep water. We may not find our gold right away but if we continue to seek, one day we shall find.

As I have no clue what my future has in store for me, I can only hope and pray my future is brighter then the past. While I have seen glimmers of hope, and perhaps even love in my future, I proceed cautiously. I’ve seen and felt hope before only to be destroyed by it. This time around I am more cautious then I was before. This time also, I’m in a much better position. My faith is strong and when I needed proof the answers were given to me. We only need to have faith, and we too can see the truth. While we may not always get what we want, we will be given what we need. We must learn to understand the wants and the needs, and to also understand the repercussions of decisions. Many of our hardships will be a result of our own choices and thus we must remember we always reap what we sew.

Tomorrow’s answers will come when tomorrow does. Worry not about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry for itself. If we spend all our time worrying about our possible failures, or our possible rejections, if we never take that chance, or the leap we will truly never fly. You can’t live life with training wheels on your bicycle so take them off, put on your big boy pants or your big girl panties, and be ready for the world as it comes. Just remember though, a leap of faith doesn’t mean jumping without a parachute. Try to have at least some slight idea so you don’t fall to your own doom. Take the idea, and have faith that God will help guide you to work out the details. Trust in the Lord with thine whole heart and lean not unto your own understanding, but have faith in the truth and the light, and your way, your path shall be lit for you.

The Want, The Need, The Fall

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The Want, The Need, The Fall

When you are living life there are things we absolutely need, then there’s things we want. What’s the difference between the two, and why is it dangerous to pursue our wants? When we are moving along there’s things we need, food, shelter, water, and protection. We need to make money to pay the bills and make a living for ourselves. Everything else is a want in life, I want a new phone, a new computer, a new TV, whatever new gizmo, or gadget fancies our attention, the truth is we often place wants more then our needs.

I was reading the news the other day and this mother went to Europe for several days while leaving her children at home alone to fend for themselves. She left 2 12 year olds, a 6 year old and a 7 year old, while she traveled through the EU. Report said she was there sometime prior to the 21’st and not scheduled to return till Oct 1st. Now, what kind of mother does this? This is someone who has no regard for need, instead only considers the want.

What happens when a wife gets bored with her life? When she is no longer satisfied with her life and for some reason she’s compelled to seek out something more, something erotic, she’s willing to put aside every ounce of what’s right, and every shred of decency to throw it out of the window and leave it behind. Peoples wants can be healthy, or they can be destructive. The key is where the heart is and the motives behind the want. I want to make the world a better place for people so I write this blog. I want to reach as many people as I can with the word of the Lord, but as much as I’m compelled to do it, it’s not a need, even if some days it feels like I need to spread the Gospel.

When the selfishness of someone takes over and blinds us from what we should be doing we can see how the want in our life can affect the fall into pure sin. When sinful desires take over we will always be found going down the wrong path, one of destruction. Philippians 4:11-13 “Not that I speak from want, for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled and going hungry, both of having abundance and suffering need. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.”

 The heart that cannot feel content will always want. When marriage isn’t enough and more is wanted, it’ll never be enough. The new car will never be new long but will only satisfy but a moment. The newest best and brightest is only a fleeting moment but when the neighbor gets the new, newest thing the envy and greed takes over the mind and soul.

How quickly do we forget Proverbs 14:30 “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.” We will never be at peace when all we want is more. The truth to happiness is to be content. We will always have dreams and hopes, and there are always things that would be nice to have, but when that is what consumes our drive we will surly fall. Be at peace with life, learn to love it for what it is. When you are faithful to Love and faithful to God you will be blessed beyond your dreams. Sometimes it just takes patience. It takes great skill to be still in the storm.

 

 

The Empathy Within

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The Empathy Within

How do you feel when you see the suffering of others? What does your heart do when you see on TV the faces of the children drinking from dirty puddles? How do you feel when you see the animals that have been abused and tortured? Where’s your heart at? When someone gives you their problems do you raise them up or shoot them down? When someone is hurting and it’s not their fault do you try to help or do you push away? I say again, where’s your heart?

The day may bring great joy and you may be in the season of peace, of happiness, a life without strife, without pain, and without much worry of any kind. The curtain can be drawn back to reveal the truth, the man behind the curtain as it were. When the going gets tough do your friends stick by you and help you through or are you left in the road beaten and dirty? You see the truth is many of us don’t stop to help the beaten traveler on the road. Many of us turn away, looking someplace else because it quite frankly it isn’t my concern. In a blog I wrote a while back I talked about how many people are fair-weather fans. I’ve written about the Good Samaritan and the man under the hood, but what do they all have in common? Empathy, or simply put, the lack thereof, and it’s a lesson I’ve learned the hard way this last year. So few people have empathy for others, and I believe the route of the problem is a lack of love for your fellow man.

When friends abandon you because you’re going through a hardship is that a sign of the level of their love? What about when a marriage falls apart because there’s a rough patch? If we loved more deeply, and allowed ourselves to actually feel the pain of others, we might be less inclined to abandon ship at the first sign of water.

 

Your Love, by Brandon Heath

But your love
Your love
The only the thing that matters is your love
Your love is all I have to give
Your love is enough to light up the darkness
It’s your love
Your love
All I ever needed is your love

 

Give Me Your Eyes, Brandon Heath

Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see,
Everything that I keep missing,
Give your love for humanity.
Give me your arms for the broken-hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach.
Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten.
Give me Your eyes so I can see.

 

When we look at the people around us we gloss over them and we don’t see the truth. We as a people, as a society have lost our ability for a lot of reason to see the pain underneath the surface. Men in our time hold onto the pain they feel, the suffering, the shame, or guilt of their actions. Women have lost the nurturing side of who they where. Where’s the love, where’s the empathy we are supposed to have?

Christ felt deeply for the sick, the lame, the poor, and the hungry. Christ went to great lengths to feel their pain, to ease their suffering. Christ performed miracles almost always for the betterment of those who needed it most. He could feel the pain, he could feel the suffering, and he had empathy for their situation. The Lord loves us, and as we suffer in our situation know the Lord is with us always. While people may fail you, Christ won’t. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” You and I, the human race must remember to find what we’ve lost and that’s love. It isn’t just enough to see the suffering of others we must feel the suffering of others. Romans 12:15 “Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep.” We must serve the Lord and when we do that we must be able to see the world as Christ sees the world. The Lord of all see and feels all things. If you are a person who things you are above helping someone, above feeling empathy for those who have less then you, I say shame on you. Galatians 6:2-3 “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. 3 For if anyone thinks he is something, when he is nothing, he deceives himself.”

 We are nothing without Christ’s love so why do we not share that love with others? Why are we so consumed with our own petty selves? Without the grace of God we would have nothing, and when we abandon those we supposedly love what does that say about our true nature? When we turn our backs, abandon them because their ‘negativity’ is ‘too much’ to handle. Shame on you, if that’s something you’ve done. When you abandon someone in need I would surmise you are actually sinning. I believe when you turn your head the other way and you allow the suffering of others to happen within your attention you do not love your neighbor as you are commanded too.

Just remember one thing, when you forsake a friendship and you abandon them to face their sorrows alone, the day will come when you yourself are in need. Who then will help you when you found it too inconveniencing to be there for them? Empathy is about having love for your fellow human beings, and one day you might just need a friend. Sure it’s easy to be someone’s friend when everything is fine, but when the going gets tough, don’t just hop the next flight out of town just because you can’t be bothered with it. That’s entirely selfish and ridiculous. If you’re going to call someone a friend, and if you’re going to tell them you love them, then prove it when it matters most.

 

 

 

 

Service With Honor

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Service With Honor

In life sometimes there is one person we will connect with on a very special level. Ever since my time in this world I haven’t had a connection more then that I feel with my service dog. Riley has been with me for the last 6 years and in that time a connection has grown. Every day I go out she goes with me. That time together we have spent a relationship has grown for the both of us. She has never left me, she has never not been there watching out for me. She knows when I hurt and she does everything within her power to make that better. Her training has taught her to alert me when anxiety levels are high. She knows to watch my six anytime we are out in town. She alerts me if people walk up behind me, she protects me by passively standing in between someone and myself. She can walk with me while I’m using both hands to push a shopping cart and always knows just where to be. She doesn’t like when I’m not around just as much as I don’t like it when she’s not. I’ve grown to depend on her and she depends on me. In our life we will often have pets throughout our life. Riley isn’t my pet, she’s my best friend. When I come home if she’s not been with me she’s super excited to see me. She can’t wait to give me hugs and kisses. Yes I taught my service dog how to hug people. I will be her entire life, and even though she will only be apart of my life for a short while, the impact she’s had on me will be forever.

Riley has seen me through my darkest days. When I returned home from my injury last year she was there to help me when the quiet was banging on my eardrums. She was there for me when I cried. She laid in my lap, and she’d lick my face when I cried. She curls up with me at night providing warmth and comfort. While she’s incapable in stopping every nightmare I have, she’s always a constant presence for me when I wake up. Riley’s ability to take hand signals from me, her ability to listen to simple instruction, and then complex instructions. Her being out with me every day prevents me from falling into a situation where I could potentially be taken to the hospital. Though she’s not been able to prevent every anxiety attack, she’s certainly tried.

I was recently asked what to military dogs do? I’ve heard people say what a service dog is not, and say what a service dog doesn’t do. I’ve heard that a service dog would never ‘sniff’ anyone. I’ve heard service dogs shouldn’t need ‘spoken direction’. This couldn’t be further from the truth. While not every service dog requires focus like diabetes alert dogs, or seizure dogs, the ignorance of our society astounds me. Recently I learned that a local hospital I frequent often has a policy that only a small particular group is covered under the rule, Amputee, Seeing Eye, Hearing Impaired, are the only dogs officially covered. However the policy is all dogs are to be accepted so long as the dog isn’t causing any issues, and is behaving. The problem with this policy is the liberty it gives the employees to discuss services dogs. Recently I heard an argument between two employees about the definition of what service dogs do or don’t do. It was loud enough to interrupt my conversation with someone about my service dog. Military dogs are trained extensively prior to going into war. The military trains its dog to detect explosive materials and weapons. Military dogs can also detect drugs and other contraband. These dogs require direction, just like any other service dog. Even the best-trained dogs can have their issues. I recently saw a movie about a military bomb dog, and as you watch, you’ll see that no matter what a dog’s trained to do, a dog is still a dog. They will suffer from the same things people do. My dog for instance doesn’t like elevators or bridges. I’ve never understood why she doesn’t like walking bridges, but her fear is what it is. I have learned to work around her fear understanding we all have them.

 

Service with honor

If my verbal direction sounds like a problem, to that I say ‘Stay in your lane.’ People in our society have to have an opinion. People have to not just have an opinion they have to state their opinion, and instead of directing the appropriate questions to people who know, they argue and bicker. Another thing I’ve noticed is how some people will ask ‘why do they need a service dog, I don’t see anything wrong with them?’ This question upsets me a great deal. While I’ve studied mental illness, the affects of PTSD, and the cause of anxiety, if that person as a panic/anxiety attack, you hope they have their dog. Feeling that way is horrible, speaking from experience. Panic attacks cause an increase in heart rate, blood pressure, trouble breathing, and can often manifest dizziness. The calming affect from animals is evident through science. Trained service animals still take some kind of commands. Bomb dogs need direction, even hearing and other kinds of dogs all take commands.

All I ask is if you’re going to make assumptions on service dogs, perhaps you need to do some research first, or ask someone with a service dog. Please don’t pass judgment on those with service animals, and please don’t assume just because you can’t see any disability doesn’t mean they aren’t there.

service with honor 3

For those of us who’ve served we serve with Honor. We allow those who have served our country to suffer with PTSD, with the nightmares from the life we’ve lived. From today as we remember 9/11 we remember the fallen, and the survivors. We can only hope that we have learned from our mistakes, and remember service comes in many ways. The years after tragedy the ones who are left should be honored, the ones that have fallen are lost but never forgotten. No matter the season, no matter the day, those who serve write a blank check in the act of that service. Firefighters in New York, Police, and the New York Port Authority, wrote a blank check on this day 16 years ago. Soldiers have been writing that check for generations past, and generations to come. People who work in the services put themselves in harms way and we take off our hats to remember them. We learn to pick ourselves up, and we united in the months following 9/11. We’ve fallen wayside in the following years, and we ought to remember to slow down in our lives and we need to remember the simple truth, we are all human, not black, not white, not any other race, we are humans. We are also all Americans. We have a commonality far greater then what we live today. We all have Jesus Christ and in front of the cross we are judged the same. We are always on equal footing in front of God All Mighty, and thus we must remember to set our personal differences aside and join on equal footing to fight and defend this nation. We honor the dead by fighting, and we are not done fighting.

Stop Living In The Past

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Stop Living In The Past

I was recently talking to one of my very best friends and in the process I made note how much the month of September scared me, and for obvious reasons she understood. While I am absolutely terrified that something bad will happen this month, I have a hard time separating fear from reality. As each and every day is a new struggle coupled with a new attack, we must always be alert, and always learning new ways to defend against the attacks in the dark.

In our world no matter what time period you live in there’s always a war being waged. “There’s battle lines being drawn, nobodies right if every bodies wrong.” (Buffalo Springfield) As we move through life we are always running, running away from something, running away from someone, we are running to someone or something. The idea that we are running from something is a universal constant. Me in my life I’ve always run from my pain. I’ve always tried to hide it, to bury it, and keep it locked up so no one could ever see it, especially myself. I’ve found it difficult to move forward from my most recent trauma. I’ve known people that struggled to move past the death of a close loved one and I’ve seen as it’s taken it’s toll on relationships. I’ve seen people stay stuck on old relationships and even marriages that have ended badly, for a long time and sometimes several years.

If we are going to figure out a way to face this problem head on, we must go to scripture. Philippians 3:13-14 “13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” We know that there’s always a time for everything.

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:

2 a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
3 a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.”

 

While in every situation there’s a time for everything in life, we must not get stuck in a loop of any stage. We must grieve when we need to, and move forward. We must learn what season we are in verses the season we should be in. Obviously in life it’s never that simple. There can be many things that stunt or prevent us from being able to move to the next season, but as a Christian we must always try and overcome those obstacles.

Don’t let the Devil trick you in believing you can’t do something. Don’t let the Devil trick you to think you aren’t worth anything. After my wife left me, I felt like I was worthless and no one loved me. I felt like I deserved my fate. I didn’t think anyone would ever love me again. When I survived a horrible attack on my team in Iraq and I watched as my friends died, the gut feeling I had just 15 minutes prior left me with survivors guilt. I’ve spent the better part of the last year fighting every day to grow and face my fears. I’ve struggled day in and day out with feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness. Within those feelings is the war between good and evil. The literal war being waged inside is a struggle some people face every day. God is King of Kings, and over the entire world we see and don’t see. When our life is ripped away and we feel as if nothing good remains the nature of the flesh is hard to overcome and face the darkness inside. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 “ For though we walk in the flesh, we are not waging war according to the flesh. 4 For the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. 5 We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ” The war being waged inside we must understand that in a war there are casualties. Sometimes they are casualties seduced by the dark side and sometimes they are innocent people.

I’ve seen men who claimed to be men of God fall to the darkness. I’ve seen men I looked up to forsake me and make decisions that were a direct contradiction to scripture. For years I was told your witness to others was incredibly important as a Christian man. We must always conduct ourselves in a way that is pleasing to God, but also uphold ourselves according to the word. When we choose to support wrong doing over the wronged, or when we allow ourselves to let fear and anger dictate our actions in why we do something, we can easily make wrong decisions. When we abandon those in need, people we claim to care about we see what kind of person really is. It’s easy to praise God when things are great, and when we are dying we often pray to God to save us, but when about when things are just bad. Do we praise God, or do we curse his name? When things go bad and we walk away from someone who’s having a legitimate hard time, abandon them when they need family the most, how does your witness stand up then? The truth is, we all make mistakes, but once a mistake is made true Christians will attempt to right the wrong. We learn as Christians we cannot place our faith in people because beyond a doubt they will forsake you, they will turn on you, they will walk away from you. Mankind is fallen and we can and should only expect so much from others. We can hope for the best, but in accordance to scripture be prepared for them to let you down at some point. Sometimes people will leave you, walk out of your life and never return. People are full of worldly desires, and often make bad choices instead of returning to scripture and thinking about what the word says before moving forward. If you want to overcome this within yourself, you must constantly turn to scripture to help you through the toughest times you will face.

While in my own life I have lost people, and I’ve had people turn their backs on me, I’ve had people walk away, I’ve had those whom I loved betray me and my trust, the truth is, as much as it hurts, how surprised should I have truly been? When you loose father figures, spouses, or other loved ones it’s hard to create a reason to justify why someone did what they did. As Christians we can’t allow ourselves to stay in the past. We must learn to walk away from the negativity of the past and live in the present. Just like the ways of the Jedi we must learn to live in the present. “A Jedi must have the deepest commitment, the most serious mind. This one a long time have I watched. All his life has he looked away… to the future, to the horizon. Never his mind on where he was. Hmm? What he was doing. Hmph! Adventure. Heh! Excitement. Heh! A Jedi craves not these things. You are reckless!” (Empire Strikes Back, Yoda) Not saying of course we can’t enjoy life, and have love, we must learn to live in the now and not the past, and the future. While the past is where we are most negative, we look to the future with hope and optimism most of the time. We don’t look to the future with a negative perspective most of the time. We have grand plans, and we see the future we want, one full of rainbows and lollipops. In all actuality the future will have hardships and disappointment. We must learn to plan for the future and make sure we put our hands in the dirt, and boots on the ground. While we prepare for the future we must live in the moment. We cannot dwell on the past, instead study it, learn from it and use it to make better decisions in the future. In our daily walk with Christ we should always take a moment to think about scripture to see if our choices match up with the teachings of Jesus Christ. If you are a roll model to someone, a Christian roll model, it’s especially important to make sure that we are leading by example.

It can be difficult facing a life where people have left you, abandoned you, disappointed you, but we must always remember that the King of Kings is still sitting on the throne still in command of the forces of light in this world. Don’t fall prey to the darkness, don’t allow it to destroy your hope, or the light inside you. The draw of the dark side is strong, but we must learn to stop ourselves from succumbing to that feeling, and allow the light to snuff out the darkness. Even the slightest bit of light can keep the darkness at bay. We must learn to harness that goodness inside, allow the Love and Grace of Jesus Christ to fill our very souls and treat others with respect and love. No matter how much someone hurts you by their actions we must be able to forgive and accept that the nature of being human is to make mistakes. The nature of being Christian is to forgive and be there to love and help on a path towards Jesus. As a Christian when you make a mistake you should do everything in your power to make it better, to right the wrongs you’ve committed. Never allow pride or guilt to be the driving force in your decisions. Be a guiding light for someone, and live your life as a good witness towards others.

 

 

 

 

I live this life

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I live this life

I walked down the street just to see where my feet would take me. The darkness surrounded the alleys and the fog rose from the ground with an unstoppable force, and before you could blink the world was a damp gray in which you couldn’t see yourself. We walk our lives in a fog sometimes. We walk because we must, we breathe because of necessity. We all have cravings and some understand the nature of them, while others do not.

When we run, what are we running to or from? The life I’ve lived has been one of hardships, of pain, of suffering, of loss, but also of great joy. I’ve had the privilege of being married to two wonderful women. God gave me both to live my life with. The ending of both marriages has been described as awful and disappointing, but the truth is, as much as God hates divorce, we cannot control the path of other people. God gave me those lovely women for something in my life, and now it’s about time I stiffen my upper lip, and move forward. I look back and I see the mistakes written on the walls. I look to the future and like the street I walk it’s full of fog and darkness. I don’t know where I’m going because I cannot see. I feel around the dark blindly. I can feel the walls around me, I can feel the texture, and I can feel what my gut is telling me, but as I move forward my past although defines me, it has shaped me in the clay, and I now move forward every day to show myself what I am capable of. I wondered the wilderness for a year now the air feels crisper. The change of the hills, the trees, the air, and the wind shows me that my scars and my story are far from finished. As I walk through life I know that Jesus is still with me. A scream in the dark and followed by an answer, a journey not yet done, but a broken man who Jesus has wrapped in the healing love of the Lord and although the wounds start to heal, the scars are left behind to remind us of the hell we’ve battled through.

As I look to my future I know, I now understand that I’m not alone. Your love my God has seen me through. Your love my God has protected me from the darkness that’s surrounded me for so long. The fear of tomorrow and what pitfalls may be lurking in the terrifying darkness, are subdued by your love. Jesus my savior has promised to never leave me, and no matter what I endure for the cross on this Earthly plain will be rewarded in the next life. You know my heart, my effort, you know the price I’ve paid, and my Love for the cross, my heart that has fluttered yes, but remained true, will one day be rewarded with piece. My God is hope we all must need. When the fog of war surrounds us and we just cannot see, call to the God above and let the Angels, the Warriors of the Heavens come down with sword in hand and battle the very demons that threaten us. “Tonight I’m gonna fix my eyes, on the only hope that satisfies, my heart.” (The One I’m Running To, 7eventh Time Down) As my hope and my life has stretched me to the max, and when I’ve felt as if I’ve reached my breaking point, God is still with me no matter what battle I face. When we reach for an understanding to what we just can’t grasp, the answer is always the same. Jesus Christ, the Son of the Father died for our sins, giving up eternal hope, overcoming death itself. To believe in Christ is to live a life where there is no more sorrow, and no more pain. What’s a life worth that we can say when this life ends we can live again?

As one song reminds me:

Where my heart will take me, Russell Watson

 It’s been a long road
Getting from there to here
It’s been a long time
But my time is finally near
And I can feel the change in the wind right now
Nothing’s in my way
And they’re not gonna hold me down no more
No, they’re not gonna hold me down

‘Cause I’ve got faith of the heart
I’m going where my heart will take me
I’ve got faith to believe
I can do anything
I’ve got strength of the soul
And no one’s gonna bend or break me
I can reach any star
I’ve got faith
I’ve got faith, faith of the heart

We must allow God to continue to give us hope, that no matter how long our road may seem, how dark it is, or how much pain we endure along the way, believe that faith in Abba, that we can’t be broken, because we know who’s in our corner. Have faith in your heart in the one King, the maker of all. Have faith that one day the fog will lift, the sun will rise, and a new day dawns.

 

Gods still in control, God will stand

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Gods still in control, God will stand

We see the world around us and we come to conclusions. Everywhere we look we see a world full of hate, anger, mistrust, pain, and suffering, but it’s in those events we see the world through the eyes of someone who’s life has created a particular opinionated vantage point. The life we live is not by chance, but by design. God gives us our life and pushes us with intent to give us a good life. There are a lot of reasons why bad things happen, but above all things, God is in control.

We live in a world that right now feels like it’s falling apart. We see rioting in the streets and we see death and war on the news every day. Even as we speak Houston Texas is under water and thousands of lives are displaced and as those lives will never be the same. With the world as it is, we must remember that no matter who is president, no matter what our elected officials do, we must know that God is still on the throne, God is still in control, and we must learn to have faith even when the walls are crumbling down, when the rain is falling on our heads, and when we feel like we can’t carry on, God is in control.

Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.”

Romans 8:28 “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Isaiah 41:10 “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

No matter how deeply we struggle with our worries, and our anxiety, we must remember that our lives while they are our own from free will, we don’t have to travel down the road God wants for us. One way or another God’s will, will be done, and we can either do it the easy way or the hard way. “What has happened to a nation that used to fear the Lord, to a people who’s foundation was built upon God’s word. We’ve aloud the worlds opinion to chart a different way, but it’s time the Church of Jesus Christ should boldly stand and say. GODS WORD WILL STAND, AGAINST THE RAGING TIDE, AGAINST THOSE WHO CRITISIZE, AND WORK THEIR EVIL PLANS, GODS WORLD WILL STAND AGAINST THE GATES OF HELL, WITH POWER TO PREVAIL, IN THE HEARTS OF MAN, GODS WORD WILL STAND. They can take it from the courthouse walls, remove it from the schools, teach our children that we are animals, speak against the golden rule, try and hide our Christian heritage from the public eye, but they will never overcome Gods word no matter how they try!” (God’s word will stand, The Inspirations)

No matter where we are, the horrible or the great things that happens, God is still and always sitting on the throne. We must remember to have faith in our times of need, and thank God for being sovereign no matter when. Today, tomorrow, and always, God is God and we are nothing without Him.

 

The Wages of Sin

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The Wages of Sin

Since the fall from grace and Sin entered the world people have lived under the influence of Sin. Genesis 3:3-4 “3 but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” 4 But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. 5 For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” Mankind was tricked into allowing Satan to pull us from God’s grace. Ever since mankind has made one bad call after another. We consistently have moved in bad directions, we treat our neighbors horribly, we even treat our loved ones with disdain.

If we live our lives in a manner that is not pleasing to the Lord, a life that is against the simple commandments, we are forced to face the ramifications of our ignorance, or blatant disregard. Romans 6:23 “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Each of us gambles with our souls when we choose sin over life. Each of us puts our trust in something we will never see first hand. We believe that God is sovereign and on the throne over all. The flip side of course is what happens when we sin on purpose. Romans 5:12 “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” When we sin when we turn our backs on Christ and walk a path of wrongdoing, we can look forward to the words in Revelation 21:8 “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.”

The joys of the world, the draws of sinful nature can be enticing and often pulls us from the graces of Christ. We must remember that Christ paid for our sins under the condition we follow Him. Every one of us is given a choice. John 3:36 “He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life: and he that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him.” We can’t negotiate at the foot of the cross. All sin is created and judged equally to God. We must answer for our sins regardless of our beliefs, and yet on our best day we sin, we fall short, and sometimes we hurt those closest to us. We will always hurt those closest to us by accident, but it’s when we do it on purpose that has a particular rank. When we knowingly sin in the efforts to gain our own selfish desires, we risk it all. We never know when the end will come for us. We never know when the good Lord will end our lives. It may be when we are old and gray in our beds, or it may be the next time we go walking outside our door, either way, we wager our eternal lives on the pursuit that the Devil promised all those years ago. We know good and evil, and the world is surly evil. We see people doing good works in the name of the Lord, but even those who do good works can fall from grace. Don’t turn your back on the Lord when times get tough. Don’t believe the lies of Lucifer, and don’t let go of your salvation just for the joys of Sin.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finding my Black Canary

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Finding my Black Canary

Do many of you often wonder where you other half is? As I have often wondered what the next step in my life may be, I question the range of relationships. While I’ve wondered why the women I have loved have decided to move on with their lives and leave the life built behind them, I consistently struggle with the reason for this particular path. While the why isn’t the focus here the focus is how do we move forward? Sometimes we love and loose, how do we begin to fix our broken hearts?

Psalm 34:18 “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”

Psalm 147: 3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

Romans 8:39 “nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

1 John 4:10 “In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.”

Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

 When we are down and broken we know that the Lord is with us and our crushed spirits. We can only rely on the spirit to pick us back up. The Lord starts to heal us the instant the stab to our heart happens. Just because wrongs are done, and they may be done by us, or to us, neither wrong can separate us from the Lord. Jesus is hand in hand with us no matter what. The God above, the creator of heaven and earth, forgives our sins and it is the love of God that give us strength. We are nothing without God, and without God’s grace. Everything we have is a gift. Either God gives us our gifts, or sends us along our path. Either God sends us our pain, or allows our pain to happen. No matter what the case may be, all things happen with the blessing of God. God only allows us to travel a path as long as He deems fit. Sin will only be tolerated in our lives for so long before we will be punished by our Father. How long will we blatantly Sin in our lives before we realize we are wrong and fix it?

Psalm 71:20 “You who have made me see many troubles and calamities will revive me again; from the depths of the earth you will bring me up again.” No matter how far we fall, no matter how deeply we hurt, God will lift us up again and help us heal. We aren’t meant to be alone. Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.” No matter our situation we shouldn’t allow ourselves to become overwhelmed. We need to learn to let go of our sorrows and allow the Lord to take care of them. We must endure our crucibles to survive them. We must learn that our gifts will far outweigh our pain and suffering.

For me I believed I had found my Black Canary to my Green Arrow. I believed I had found the woman who completed me. I never wanted anyone else. I felt in my days like I was missing something, like I needed friends to complete what I perceived as missing. The fact was I wasn’t truly looking for friends the truth was I was still dealing with the ramifications of multiple posttraumatic events in my life. Loosing the woman I loved, the woman I would have done anything for and fought to give anything I could. There were many reasons she left, most of which I don’t know, and even to this day don’t understand. However, as broken as I am, I feel badly for her. As I pray one day she may remember the spark that led us together to start with, allow us to rekindle what was damaged. Anything is possible if you believe in Christ. While I have struggled with my ability to move on I have to have faith in the unknown. I believe that no matter the time that goes by if two people are meant to be together life will somehow draw them back together. Love is undying, love is forever, but everything is in God’s time. Some day I will find my woman in a mask to match my own. One day I will find a woman who will don the mask and put on the jacket. I will keep the faith as all of you out there have lived through loss and divorce. Divorce doesn’t have to be the end. Trust in the Lord and in Him your future will be, as the sun shall rise. We must learn patience and in that patience trust that in God’s time someone will come into your life. Remember to put God first, and always. Believe in the Lord and don’t forget to pray. I myself struggle with the patience of such things. Even with that struggle I pray and know that prayer is important in our daily relationship with the Lord our Father. 1 John 5:14-15 “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.” Have trust in our prayers being heard for Abba is with us always.