The Good Shepherd

The Good Sheperd

John 10:11 “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.”

As we move into this Easter morning, I wanted to spend a few minutes talking about how important this holiday truly is. We as a nation have walked away from the Cross and have forgotten the true meaning of sacrifice. The Easter Bunny and eggs, and baskets have become the focus and while that stuffs fun, this day is about so much more. Good Friday is a day of pain, of suffering, of death and sorrow. A debt we could never fulfill, but one could. A bill that would come due, and no matter how much good intentions we had, it wouldn’t satisfy the bill, but one man could. See, Easter is about hope, love, and self sacrifice.

Jesus would be the man born from woman fathered by the Spirit of God. He would be raised humbly, and when he was ready his journey to ministry began. He would face many hardships along the way, and as the Sanhedren became growingly anxious about his rise, they feared that Jesus would try to take his place as King, thus crumbling their seat of power. Jesus would be betrayed by a close friend Judas, and for 30 pieces of silver the price was paid for the man the people were calling the messiah. Judas escorted the Roman soldiers to the garden where Jesus was with the rest of the apostils. A kiss of betrayal, and foreseen by Christ, the beginning of the end.

Jesus would be tried and convicted for crimes he never committed. His fate would be put to the people in exchange for a known murderer, and yet the people decided to kill Jesus instead. Jesus would offer no defense and would take the beating, which left him bleeding out, and nearly unrecognizable. He would carry his own cross to the place he would be hung. Matthew 27:45-4645 From noon until three in the afternoon darkness came over all the land. 46 About three in the afternoon Jesus cried out in a loud voice, “Eli, Eli,[a] lema sabachthani?” (which means “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”).[b]” This fulfilled the messianic prophecy from ancient biblical times. This moment God had separated from the man, and the man took the full wrath of God for the payment of sins. In that moment Jesus cries out John 19:30 “When Jesus had received the sour wine, he said, “It is finished,” and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.” Tetelestai which means it is finished, complete, and at that moment the Earth shook, the sun was covered, the temple crumbled and the tapestry was split from top to bottom symbolizing the end of the separation from God and man. The death of Christ was the pure sacrifice, the blood debt that was paid for the sins of man past present and future.

Jesus would rise again Easter morning. The cloth, which covered his face, would be folded and in that time symbolizing he was done, finished, and he would show himself to many as the risen Christ. The end of the man had come, but the beginning of the living risen king had just begun. We celebrate the defeat over death, and know that one day we too will rise and join the paradise of heaven. We too will be given the gift of eternal life and we will be blessed in the life beyond. The person who believes in Jesus Christ and who is reborn with the Holy Spirit in their hearts will be awarded the key to heaven. To love Christ with all your heart, to love your neighbors and to live as Christ would want. We are a people of sinful desires, of a wavering heart, but if we stay true to Christ, admit our sins, and love the father then we shall defeat death. The bill’s already be paid for us, all we have to do is love. We have to believe with the entirety of our hearts.

On this Easter Sunday, I ask are you saved? Do you know your savior? Do you know the blood spilt for you that would break your bonds of sin forever, and in a moment of pure love, Christ gave up his life for you and me. It’s because of Jesus Christ we no longer live in darkness. It’s because of Christ we can wake up in the morning full of hope, and share that hope with others. Today is a day for hope, for praise that the savior defeated death and we to are given that blessing. Without Easter we would have no hope, no purpose, but we are told to go forth and to make disciples, to spread the word of Jesus, and to baptize all in the Holy Spirit. We are never alone because the God over all is with us every day. Celebrate this glorious day, and remember with every tragedy is a chance to rise.

 

 

Chasing Waterfalls

Chasing Waterfalls

I have spent years looking for what was right in front of me, but sadly I couldn’t see the things I needed the most in my life. The first thing I needed to find was my own place in God’s love. The second was to realize how in a fleeting moment I would loose the women I had loved with my whole heart. Although I always felt like I gave her everything I possibly could, perhaps there was one more thing I could have given to her, my fear. I never once thought the day would come when she wouldn’t be standing by my side so I never felt the need to be jealous, or concerned with other guys. I consider now the two things in my life I needed the most and yet now after I lost so much, it feels like I may be too late. If I only had a chance to say my hearts desire and have them be heard could I change my fate? Tomorrow the sun will rise and I will have one of my failings be placed on the right path, but the other, I have a heavy heart. The women I loved is still gone because of my own inaction, my own failures as a leader of my household, and I must accept the responsibility of her leaving. While I have been told time and time again I am not at fault, she was happy, and then she wasn’t. I cannot stand idly by and think there was nothing I could have changed. Still, in the here and now, all I have is my hope for her, and wish her the very best on her own path. If I could tell her how much she means to me, and how much I love her, I would. I don’t know if those words would ever mean anything anymore, but perhaps one day they might. I have my path I must walk, and though it saddens me we won’t be walking this path together, I pray that maybe a miracle may happen and she finds her way back to me. Today I find myself thinking of the resurrection of Christ, which is coming. I think of the pain and suffering Christ endured for the sins of man, and yet he took the pain, took the punishment for all of us. He alone carried the burdens of Sin and freely gave his life to give everyone hope. We could only be so lucky to provide hope to someone else.

In the months after it happened, I found myself trying to move forward, trying to put my life back together but there was always something. I have wrestled with my place in this world and as I have found one of them, the other seems as elusive as a waterfall hidden in the deepest jungles. I have found peace with myself for the first time I can remember. I think it’s fitting that this weekend is about resurrection. I think it’s time for me to make some changes in my life. While I would like my life to go back to the way it was, I realize that can never happen. I’ve become a much better person now then I was back then. I have come to find my self worth and now find it’s a little easier managing being alone. I question what my future holds for me. I wonder if I’ll get my own home soon, find a new job, meet anyone special, and as I search for the answers to these questions, I remind myself to have faith, be patient, and above all, have faith in the plan that is beyond my understanding. Trusting in God isn’t always easy, but it’s something we all have to come to grips with at some point in our lives. Proverbs 3:5-6 “5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

I struggle with my own thorns, and in my struggle I lean upon the grace and mercy of the Lord. I cannot spend all my time chasing a waterfall I may never find. I must learn to let go of the things I cannot change and focus on the things I can. I cannot focus on the things I want and will never obtain. I find myself reciting the serenity prayer in my head often these days. I pray for my scenery to change and hope perhaps one day it shall. I cannot say what my future holds, but as for my past, maybe some things will never be as gone out of my life as they should be. Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” It’s time for me to stop chasing the waterfalls and to focus on what’s in front of me. It’s time I give myself the respect I deserve and stop allowing others to make me feel badly about myself. I have spent so long putting so much faith in people for my own personal validation of my own self worth that it’s no wonder I feel like garbage. If I spend my time with people who are selfish, leaches who are only in a friendship so long as they benefit, that’s on me to keep floating towards the edge of that waterfall. I have been washed down river more then once, swept over the cliff and yet I wonder why when it’s me all along. I cannot change others, but I can change my own part in it. I can stop playing so close to the edge. It’s up to me to stick closer to friendlier waters. No longer will I play in the waters edge. I cannot, I must not put myself through that any longer. God give me strength to walk away, strength to heal, to find peace.

Don’t Be a Coward

Don’t Be a Coward

It’s not easy following God’s plan, or the path in front of you. I have spent a long time trying to fit in with the crowd yet no matter how much I’ve tried I never quite did. Recently however, I found my place in a new crowd, and let go of some of my outer defenses. By the end of the week I was nicknamed preacher, and by the end of the weak I’d realized one thing, I became courageous. We are soldiers, every last one of us. We were made to be courageous, and we were made to fight a war. Every day the Devil wins a new soul, yet our fight doesn’t end with our own personal salvation. I would say the day we are saved is when the real fight begins. It’s time we stand up, and we get out of the shadows we’ve been hiding in for far too long. It’s time to realize who the true enemy is, and take the fight to him. Step out of your comfort zone and know that in all things God will make you strong, God will give you the courage, the strength to do whatever he, The Great I AM, wishes of you. I stayed in the shadows afraid to make my faith known for fear of being rebuked. I now realize that the thing that was missing in my life was the thing I had all along. Accepting my place in this world wasn’t being accepted by the people I was surrounded by, but accepting that I am not sheep, but a Shepard. God has called upon me to speak and preach his Holy Word. It’s me that he has called to stand tall, stand proud, and proclaim the word of God. I am humbled by the opportunities He has given to me to expand my voice as I proclaim the truth in ways others enjoy reading. When I finally accepted my roll, finally allowed myself to hear what God’s been saying all along, I had an overwhelming sense of peace. My own Odyssey wasn’t to find or make friends even though I did along the way, it was to find me, it was to find who I am meant to be. When I say I was transformed I cannot overstate the pure raw power I found within that single week.

Months ago I found a song that rang truth in my ears, and I sang it over and over again. I couldn’t hear the words I was singing. I couldn’t see the message that God had sent to me. I was blogging, and I was telling the word, and yet, I felt alone, lost and afraid. I couldn’t see that it wasn’t the world that was holding me back, it was me that couldn’t see how I fit into the world. I was holding back from God afraid to go into the deep end. I was afraid that if I let go of my fear and doubts, I would be mocked, ridiculed, and hated for my stance. In the years I’ve been a Christian I am finding now, it is I, myself that’s been my own worst enemy. The Devil’s lies would be strong, and I would be to weak to stand against them. I believed the lie and even more then believing the lie, I began years ago to live in that lie. I knew I didn’t fit it with my friends, my family, even the women I would love. I would know I was worthless, and a fraud, a poser, a coward. I believed the lies so much that in every aspect of my life I lived the lie. The old saying is true, that when you lie to yourself long enough you begin to believe it. It was no different with me, I believed I was a waist of flesh, and I didn’t deserve anything. I was a nobody lost in the waves, tossed around lost in my own pain. I wasn’t fit to wear the filthy rags of a beggar on the street. The truth was I am no one, without God we are nothing. The God who created the Heavens and the Earth says I am someone, I am his child. The King of all creation, and I was made for a purpose. I was created with love, and I live to serve, to not be a slave to this world, but the Shepard to leave the comforts of home to find lost sheep. I was not created to be a pastor, but I was created to spread and share the great news of Jesus Christ. I know where I belong and it’s to be in Heaven one day with the Father, but until that day comes, it’s my place to reach as many people as I can as often as possible.

The Devil wants me to fail; he wants me to loose hope, to distract me from the mission. For so long I was afraid to step out from that boat, and now when the Devil whispers in my ear I’m not strong enough to withstand the storm, I now whisper back ‘I am the storm.’ I challenge you all to find your courage to stand up and be loud and proud. We all have our gifts, and every last one of us can be a soldier for Christ. Do not be afraid of the Devil because he can’t do anything to remove your salvation. Do not be afraid of death for we all must meet our maker someday so even if the Devil puts me on the fast path to death, that just means I get to go home sooner. The voice of truth says do not be afraid, do not be dismayed for the Lord is with you. The voice of truth says the war is won, the Devil just doesn’t know it yet. Allow your pain and suffering to fuel your faith, to stand taller, to yell as loud as you can that the living waters of the Holy Spirit have washed you creating a new creation. Don’t just say what people want to hear, say what they need to hear. Don’t be a yes man, do what’s right. Sometimes doing what’s right is to say no. The Lord has seen fit to wash away the doubt I held in my heart, and the transformation within me has been nothing short of a miracle.

I’m not a perfect man, but I strive to have my Father be proud of me. I strive for God to be pleased in what I say and what I do. I’ve seen the way I was, and the way I am, and that feeling of not fitting in was washed away. I know I will fail, and I know I will fall, but I know God will forgive my shortcomings, and I know that God will love me enough to scold me when I’m wrong, reward me when I’m good, and will over a hand when I need it. God is always with me, and I know now that sometimes being a believer in Christ may make me an outsider with man, but I will fit right in when I go home. When I expire I will leave this world, and leave this broken body for a life of beauty and perfection. I will be given a new perfect body where I will be beautiful and accepted for me. My journey didn’t end at my Odyssey, no, it was just the beginning, it was my beginning. I hope to stand tall, and stand proud proclaiming the one truth anyone will ever need. I will be attacked in the coming days, weeks, and years, by the Devil who will try to break me. I know the battle was won, but the war for me is far from over. Like so many greats before me, I could only dream of standing as tall as them. David, Esther, Moses, Paul, any of them I would gladly set as my inspiration to become more like. Each struggled with their own failings, but God has made ordinary people into legends. While I have no belief I will be remembered as a legend, I know that I can at the very least offer to leave this world a better place then where I found it. With every breath I take I now know my true place in this world. Hallelujah to the one above who helped me cut the last tie to a scared boy.

Zephaniah 3:17 “17 The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.” The Lord created you, gave you life, and in that life inlaid gifts, talents, and a soul to love. God loved us so much that in an act of love sacrificed his only son, to spare us the pain of total separation from the Father. Romans 5:8God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” It’s this love we see the true sacrifice made. We are not saved by works, but through God alone. Matthew 19:26 “But Jesus looked at them and said to them, “With men this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” We are to live like Christ, and in that we are told to share and preach the Gospel. To gather followers, and baptize the world in the Holy Spirit, so we must be willing to follow as Christ walked. John 10:11 “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.” Do not just stand by and watch, get out there and get ready for the long road. We cannot stay in the shallow ends if we are to be the Shepard in Christ. Ready yourselves with the armor of God Ephesians 6:10-18. Stand tall, and find your courage. The world may hate you, friends may turn their backs on you, but God, God will never forsake you. I want to be remembered when I die for being a Godly man, who fought the good fight. I want to leave behind a legacy of Godly children who follow in dad’s footsteps. But if I’m a coward and I run from danger, I run away with fear in my heart, I’ll never achieve greatness. If I am to achieve any real measure of success it must be before the Lord all mighty, not the standards of man. Stand tall, and be courageous in your walk with the Lord. Do not be afraid if you stray a little along the way, God will help you back on course. The promise made by God is a tab that’s already been paid. The Blood of Christ spilt so our sins may be forgiven and that relationship with God no longer divided. Believe in yourself because God believes in you.

 

 

God, the Ultimate Dungeon Master

God, the Ultimate Dungeon Master

If any of you are like me then at some point in your life you sat around a room with a whole bunch of weird looking dice, a character sheet, some assorted books, and a ton of caffeine, enough to fuel an army for two days. I was a Dungeons & Dragons nerd growing up. Recently I was talking to a good friend of mine about the difference between Calvinism, and Arminianism. Without getting to much into the theological debate which I am just now starting to understand, it’s basically predestination, or free will. Where are we in our faith? While this point isn’t really important in the grand scheme of things, it’s trusting in God and knowing the path to salvation. While I do believe people have free will and we are not predestined in every aspect, I do believe some events are going to happen no matter what you do. As I stated in my recent conversation, “Kinda like an RPG. You’re gonna face the dragon, what you do is up to you.” (Arrow Preacher) Isn’t it an interesting thought that God is a master mathematician? In our life the vast majority of everything we see and touch can be found in math. If God were able to decide the percentages on every single decision you make by a percentage chance, and thus the future is slightly altered to suit God’s inevitable plan. But then my favorite theory, is actually the multi-verse theory. For every conceivable action we can make we do, and so on and so forth. A string followed by God who has the ability to pier through the looking glass past present and future. While all of this is purely personally theoretical, I will say for sure, God is the Alpha and the Omega. God see’s all and whether God is more of a hands off God, or God’s influence is in every single decision we make, it really makes no difference. God is God, Jesus Christ is our Savior, and in His blood we are washed of our sins.

Psalm 135:6 “Whatever the LORD pleases, He does, In heaven and in earth, in the seas and in all deeps.”

Psalm 115:3 “But our God is in the heavens; He does whatever He pleases.”

 Daniel 4:35 “All the inhabitants of the earth are accounted as nothing, But He does according to His will in the host of heaven And among the inhabitants of earth; And no one can ward off His hand Or say to Him, ‘What have You done?’

 Matthew 19:26 “And looking at them Jesus said to them, “With people this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

 We must learn to be steadfast in our life toward God. While each and every day we are faced with new challenges, new obstacles, we must always look to the Dungeon Master and when we are given the choice how we are going to behave, we need to remember the DM is always watching. If we are to live our lives on our path, we need to focus on what kind of character in God’s game we want to be. We have our option to how we behave. There are several alignments in the world of D&D, and when we look them over, what type of person are we? Personally I would fall in Neutral Good. I believe sometimes the law does not offer the need to do the right thing in every circumstance. I believe if a true vigilante or hero type person were to rise, I would support that. I think sometimes in the pursuit of justice a particular eye should be viewed. Man often makes laws that don’t follow God’s laws. Once upon a time worshiping Christ was against the law in some ancient countries, and believe it or not, there are still countries today where the church is still persecuted. Thus I hold fast to the need to be Neutral Good. If Christianity were to become illegal I would continue to sidestep the law in the pursuit to worship. I believe sometimes the law doesn’t hold what’s morally right based on scripture. When you follow the Lord and stay true to the Gospel you can’t go wrong.

Man is fallible but the word of God is enduring. While we are told to follow the law of the land I don’t believe this was a black and white standing. While early Christians were following the rule of Rome, they practiced their faith some in private so they weren’t hunted. This tells me that not all laws made are justified laws, and yet we must respect God’s decisions to allow the leaders to be leaders. That being said, as a Christian I believe we must always put the word of God before the laws and words of men, and thus, Neutral Good. Sometimes bending or breaking the laws of man for the good of God’s word is necessary. Have faith and follow God. Remember when you get to your dragon, you alone have the choice as to what you are going to do.

How Does It Feel?

How Does It Feel?

Have you ever been in emotional distress? Have you ever been in a position where you were anxious but maybe you didn’t know why? Emotions can be powerful, and sometimes they can be overwhelming. In the first step of managing distress, we must first change the physiological response. There are several ways we can do this, and the first step no matter what it is, or the cause, is to stop and realize what’s going on. Moving out of emotion mind and moving into wise mind using reason mind to pull us to center. If you feel so mad you’re shaking, or you get so mad you fly off the handle and throw stuff, or you yell, or punch walls, it’s a good bet you’re in pure fledged emotion mind. Often strong emotions can be destructive, so when we find ourselves in that mindset, lets take a moment to realize where we are, and step back. From every thought there is a feeling, and with every feeling there is an action. We must learn to stop between the feeling and consider what that action may be. We must be able to recognize our actions and determine what the consequence will be. James 1:19 “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:” When we take a moment to listen to the Holy Spirit in our hearts, we should feel a conviction to calm ourselves or at least recognize the flesh/sin behavior in ourselves. Assess your thought into the feeling, and once the feeling comes, take a moment to pause before that feelings becomes an action. Remember, once something is said or done there is no rewind button. The things we say, and do may have a lasting effect upon our lives. For every opportunity we have to control our actions, we have the possibility to show our witness as living in Christ.

When you feel the strong emotions inside you building, step back and find a way to temporarily lower your physical response. An ice pack below your eyes onto your cheeks can lower your response. There are many steps you can take to help lower your distress. You can do 20 minutes of extensive exorcise or physical activity. We want to make sure these things are healthy. No punching walls is not healthy, nor is punching people, pets, or any other nonsense like that. Deep breathing techniques are a favorite of mine. I often mix this with muscle relaxation. This is the process of tightening muscle groups on the inhale, and relaxing them on the exhale. This works from head to toe. There are other things we can do, such as stepping out of our stressor for a few moments and breathe. We can phone a friend to help calm down, or engage in something we know for a fact relaxes us. Disclaimer, I am not talking about substances such as drugs or alcohol. This is using your mind and body to help heal itself in distress.

These things take time and when they are put into practice and grow in skill, you will find what works better, and what doesn’t. As I mentioned breathing and muscle works well for me in the moment, but if I am feeling stressed, or anxious, if I can, I try to build a Lego set, or go for a walk, play a video game, or read. If we are honest with ourselves, we don’t have to keep our cups (of stress) full. I was told recently how PTSD is like climbing a mountain. While we may never reach the top there will be moments when we reach plateaus, but more importantly, what we choose to carry in our rucksack is entirely up to us. There will be things from our past that many of us carry with us, but if we’re being honest we don’t have to. Some things that shape you, you need with you, so some things in your pack are mandatory, but others are entirely optional. It’s taken me years to start getting to a healthy weight in my own pack, but for the first time in my life, I feel lighter then I’ve been in a long time.

We must learn the heart of Christ. In Christ we must learn that our lips, our tongues. We are ambassadors of Christ and we must be honest with ourselves and find who we are again. Managing your PTSD, anxiety, depression is an Odyssey of your own. The journey may not be a quick and easy one, but with time, effort, endurance, and patience you too will one day make it home. PTSD, or any of the other ailments people may suffer from does not define you. If anyone is like me I was always worried how people would treat me if they knew what I suffered with. I was always worried how I would be judged, and even though Jesus on more then one occasion told us not to judge one another. Even though I like to think I follow that code, others don’t. We are a judgmental people, and my flesh desire to fit in has kept me in my own pain for a long time. Once I finally admitted to myself that I was honestly the one holding myself back by forcing myself to stay trapped in my own negative judgments. This was depression, a lack of motivation, staying in the house, avoiding social events, and trying to make connections online because it was easier then facing people directly afraid of rejection. When I realized I was keeping myself stuck on the side of the mountain, my rucksack heavy, weighing me down, I was unable to pick myself up to continue on. Are we holding onto guilt, and shame, fear, and loss on our daily walk? How much pain are we holding onto? When will decide to finally let it go, and live in our moment? I know when I was on a ruck march in the military I loved the feeling of finally releasing those straps and feeling the weight of my ruck leave my shoulders. When we hold onto all those things, every day we are adding more stress, more anxiety, more troubles, and more trials to our bags. We can allow the weight to crush us, or we can drop the stuff we don’t need today, and drive on. Our mission is to keep working our way up the hill, and we must learn to pack the mission essentials, and drop everything else.

Allow yourself to feel and to live in the moment. Allow your sins to flow to God for forgiveness and don’t hold onto them anymore. Make amends for wrong doings, and then move forward. Philippians 3:13-14 “13 Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.” There was a famous monkey one time that had great advice. “The past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it or learn from it.” (Rafiki) The message is so plain and simple, yet one of the hardest things we may ever try to put into action. The concept of dealing with your past and not holding onto it is centuries old. Isaiah 43:18-19 “Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. 19 See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”

So how do you feel? Do you feel like you’re in control over your emotions, or do they control you? Do you feel you are in control over your own weight you carry, or is crushing you? If you don’t have control fear not, you can gain control. You have the power to rise above your self. Don’t be a slave to your own mind any longer. Trust in the healing power of God, and go to God with your prayers of healing, and your gracious gratitude for the many blessings we all have. No day is without them for each morning we draw breath is a gift. Have faith in yourself to be able to overcome and push forward. Do not doubt yourself, and do not doubt the healing power of the Holy Spirit. Never quit, and never give up. Keep pushing up that hill.

 

When Life Goes Sideways

When Life Goes Sideways

Life moves along a particular course, lets think of it like a smooth river. Everything seems fine, and before long you feel like you’re moving faster, and without realizing it, you’re almost out of control. You barely steering your boat, and comes the rapids. In just a second you are facing forward to sideways dropping down a huge drop. You aren’t in control and all you can do is hold on tight and wait for the splash of freezing cold water at the bottom. It’s a horrible feeling knowing you aren’t in control of your own fate. It’s a horrible feeling not knowing what’s about to happen to you. Sometimes in white water rafting you are at the mercy of the waters no matter how well you try to plan it out. Sometimes you just go over the fall sideways and life’s the same way. Some days life goes sideways and you’re at the mercy of the events as they unfold. Even when you’re in the raft and you’re getting low you aren’t doing nothing. You are waiting for instruction, you are bracing, you are ready to jump into action. You might even be saying a short prayer not to be dumped into the 40* water. Life, like a moving, raging river has all kinds of surprises to it. Just like a river you can take it every day, but you never step into the same river twice. The key take away from this message today is when life goes sideways have faith in the Lord. When life goes sideways trust in the power of the Holy Spirit to see you through the freezing waters, the feeling on being out of control, because in all things, God himself is watching, and is always in control. God is never out of control, and we must be steadfast in our faith. When we remain faithful, God will bless us even when things are sour.

What is it to be steadfast in your faith, to trust in your theology? “All you have to do is live long enough to suffer.” (C.J. Mahaney, January 3, 2016, walking with God) When you live this life it’s only a matter of time for the season of trouble to come to your door. When it happens we are able to make choices and those choices will further shape our outcome. Hindsight is 20/20 meaning we have pure clarity of our past. We can review our past and we can have what I call, along with the military an After Action Review. This is a time period of reflection, of conversation of what went well, and what can be improved on. Life is the same way. When the waters are calm we have time to review scripture, to study, to prepare, and to be ready for the next set of rapids. No matter where we are in our journey there’s always going to be help, but just as Job found, there will always be those who rebuke you in the middle of the struggle. It’s important to not loose sight of your azimuth, your true north, and so long as you have your compass and you’re actually following your guide path, you will come out fine. You may have your knocks, your cuts and scrapes, but God’s always in control. Luke 21:36 “Be alert at all times. Pray so that you have the power to escape everything that is about to happen and to stand in front of the Son of Man.” We know that the storms will come and when they do you can be ready for it. No matter what, the storms will come and when it does, remember that God remains in control. Trust in the Lord on high and remember that no matter what happens, the faithful will go home. This life will end for us all, and we should not fear death, but eventually when the day comes welcome it like an old friend. We know that death is just the beginning for our journey to a better place. Life is a proving ground, and it will either build you, or break you. Life is a series of choices, and we get to choose what we want to be. We can be great Godly men, or we can be lowlife thugs. We can be inspirations to our fellow brothers and sisters, or we can be examples of what not to do. You will always be judged more by your times of struggles, then you do when life is smooth sailing. Ecclesiastes 11:8 “So if a person lives many years, let him rejoice in them all; but let him remember that the days of darkness will be many. All that comes is vanity.”

When Life Goes Sideways 2
Chattanooga River. 35* Temp Water: 40-50*

We will have days of doubt, and we will have days where we just don’t know how to handle. Right when you need a little hope, just look to the Heavens and ask for God’s healing grace. No matter your doubts and questions, fear is natural, but faith and love can concur that fear. When you know the storm is coming you do not sit and do nothing, you ready yourself, you prepare. Life is the same way. When you have time find your nose in scripture. Study, and be ready for the storm. You should be studying the art of war in preparation for the spiritual warfare we are always in. As the days go without toil, know that peace cannot last. Peace in this life is an illusion, and it’s when you let your guard down Satan will attack. Remember the Devil cannot take away the one thing you have on your side and that’s your faith in Christ. Fear is a liar telling you, you can’t, you won’t. Fear is the Devil’s number one tool. The Devil often told me I wasn’t good enough. The Devil told me I wasn’t worthy of God’s love, or the love of anyone else. I know that when my world went sideways I didn’t exactly handle it the best I could have. Luckily for me I have been given a second chance at it, and I don’t intend on wasting my opportunity.

Life is going to suck let’s just face facts. There’s going to be times when we aren’t having any fun. There’s going to be times when crying might be all we have. There’s going to be times when everything we hold most dear seems like it’s falling away. Don’t let those horrible times be a negative definer for you. Dig in your cleats and when the enemies are pushing back on your shield hold your ground. Find your God given skills, your God given talent, and your God given strength to hold your ground when the Devil’s pushing you back. You are soldiers, you are Spartan’s for Christ, and you can withstand any enemy. You can hold your ground and will make it through the night and see the rising son. Romans 8:31-32 “31 What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be[i] against us? 32 He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” If God’s in our hearts, and truly our foundation is strong with the Lord, nothing can steal our joy. Don’t let the waves of the seas laugh at you. Don’t let the lies of the Devil tell you you’re not good enough, you’re not strong enough, because on the day when life does go sideways, the voice of God will remind you you’re strong with the faith, and you can make it through anything. Do not be afraid of the storm, instead ready your mind and laugh as the Devil tries his best to break you. You’re a warrior, you’re a soldier for the winning side, and no matter what the Devil tries, he’s destined to loose. We know how it ends, we know the Devil looses, so what are we afraid of? So what if the boat goes sideways? So what if you get a little wet? Life may suck from time to time, but the worst thing that happens is you die and you go to paradise for all eternity with God. That doesn’t sound so bad to me. We’re all broken sometimes, but we’re broken together in life. Follow your compass, and be sure to check, and recheck, and you’ll keep on your path to the Lord on high. When life is tough and you can’t see through the storm, close your eyes and listen. Amen for the storm, amen for the lessons we must learn, and praise to the God who gives and takes away.

Praise you in this Storm; By, Casting Crowns

And I’ll praise you in this storm

And I will lift my hands

That you are who you are

No matter where I am

And every tear I’ve cried

You hold in your hand

You never left my side

And though my heart is torn

I will praise you in this storm

Raise your hands, and praise God. You may not feel in control of your ship, but God is. No matter where you find yourself, God’s right there with you, never leaving your side. No matter how badly you hurt, God is hurting right along side you. You may be facing hell, but the maker of Heaven and Earth is facing it with you. Do not loose hope, and do not loose faith. Lift your hands with me, and say Thank You for every tear cried, every wound we take, because without our failures we never truly learn. It’s not because of who we are, but because of God that the storms in life come and go and in them we learn to be better men in Christ. God hears us, and teaches us, and sometimes allows us to stick our finger in the proverbial light socket. The same God that calms the sea, defeats Satan, is watching over us. Don’t forget who we are when the fecal matter hits the oscillating device. You are a warrior, with the full power of the sovereign king of the universe on your side. Remember, sometimes all you can do is drop down, and hang on, and let life do it’s thing. Trust in God to get you out on the other side safe and sound.

 

Reference: http://www.sgclouisville.org/sovereign-grace-church-louisville-sermons/series/walking-with-god-when-life-goes-sideways-the-book-of-job

Push Yourself

Push Yourself

We are often pushed in our lives to do things we do, or maybe things we don’t want to do. People afraid of heights for instance, but with proper motivation you can actually achieve anything. In Christ we are told anything is possible. Life will always challenge us. We need to focus on growth and not to be the stagnant water. Look deeper and see beyond your labels. Look beyond what the average eye sees, macro photography for instance is about more then what the average eye sees, it’s about looking deeper. We are all something, and in that something we have at some point fallen into that particular label. There’s one label that is above all else the most important, Christian. In my life I’ve been many labels, son, student, employee, boyfriend, soldier, fiancé’, husband, but when all of those things were taken away what was I? When my labels crumbled like loose sand in my hands, I was left in a state of freefall. Fear of not knowing who I was, fear of not knowing who we are is a big motivator to self destruction. Fear makes people do all kinds of strange things, but we have the opportunity to dig deep, find something new, find something real, and change our tomorrow. We need to do one thing first, and that’s push yourself.

Push Yourself

I’ve never been afraid of most things other people are. Heights, water, spiders, snakes, or other things like that have never bothered me. My fears have always been strange. I had a fear when I was younger of stuff falling out of my pockets into the water. I grew out of that, but over time, one loss after another I would fear above all else abandonment. One after another the losses I faced forced me to hold on just a little tighter to the next person. I wasn’t ever jealous or controlling but I would talk often via text, or call. Since my wife left, now ex wife, I have found those whom I’ve been romantically interested in, hasn’t stuck around long. This experience that’s repeated over and over has left me doubting myself. Thus, the nature of this post. When we get to a point in our lives when we doubt ourselves we must learn to push beyond so we can grow. How do we grow if we don’t push ourselves past the limits of our own minds?

Fear can be a good thing, it can let us know when we are in real danger, but in some ways, fear is a prison within our own mind. Fear of something bad happening to you when in reality there’s very low likelihood anything will happen. I have been uncomfortable going into crowded stores ever since I returned from Iraq, but if I go with a battle buddy I’m okay. I know people who are afraid of heights, and the ocean, and spiders, and snakes, and I would surmise most fears are based on our own mortality. If you trust in God, have faith in your salvation, then are you really afraid to die? How do we push beyond our fears and end the prison we’ve remained in? When I was in South Carolina I found my battle buddies facing off with some of their biggest fears. Some guys were terrified to open up about their experiences. Some were afraid of heights, and some were afraid of rafting. Each and every man faced some fear, some big challenge and come out on the other side a different person. When we push our faith to our limits will we crack under the pressure, or rise above and grow. 2 Peter 3:18 “18 But grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and forever! Amen.”

Push yourself 2

We should walk with the knowledge that we may need to remove ourselves from our own heads, and focus on the tasks at hand. We can’t allow ourselves to freeze with fear, because someone’s counting on you. We have an obligation to push past the fear. “There are two basic motivating forces: fear and love. When we are afraid, we pull back from life. When we are in love, we open to all that life has to offer with passion, excitement, and acceptance. We need to learn to love ourselves first, in all our glory and our imperfections. If we cannot love ourselves, we cannot fully open to our ability to love others or our potential to create. Evolution and all hopes for a better world rest in the fearlessness and open-hearted vision of people who embrace life.” (John Lennon) Do not run from that danger, run towards it. Brace yourself for it, take a big breath of air, and dive right in. Plunge into that fear and show it who’s boss. “We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” (Plato) We as adults have learned to concur some fears, and yet some remain intact. When we trust in the Lord and we are able to look at life without a fear of the end because when the end comes we know where we are headed. “I’ve known fear. It’s a very healthy thing, most of the time. You warn us of danger, remind us of our limits, protect us from carelessness. I’ve learned to trust fear.” (Captain Kathryn Janeway) If we are to be completely honest with ourselves why is there fear? As I mentioned earlier, fear can be a great tool to tell us when there’s danger, limits, etc. But in the end, most things I would say are left for one thing and one thing alone, concurred. “You know as well as I do that fear only exists for one purpose: to be conquered.” (Captain Kathryn Janeway)

 Do not fall victim to your own fears. Learn to rise above and to push yourself because when you do, the sense of pride, and accomplishments will replace that fear. The day may come when you’re faced with a challenge and that challenge may bring you tremendous amounts of fear. In that time I challenge you to face your fear, dig deep and rise above. Allow the Holy Spirit to enter your heart and know that you will be carried through. We can concur anything because we’ve already concurred death through the blood of Christ. What more do we need to fear in the end when we know what awaits us past the fields of green? I know my own fear of abandonment runs deep, and I know one day I will have to face it, and I pray for strength when that day comes. I don’t want to be alone my whole life. I don’t want to fail my family in having kids to carry on the family line. I don’t want to be a failure in this life, and my battles I face aren’t in the physical world, but the battlefield in within my own heart. The battle that has been waging for many years between the Devil’s lies, and the voice of Jesus. In my heart the war wages on and some battles are won by the light, and others the dark, but as I grow in my faith, more and more battles score the win for my Savior. I’m not perfect and I have my struggles like anyone else, but it’s in those struggles I choose to never quit, never surrender, and I never, ever back down from a fight with the Devil. One loss after another, the Devil has now grown to fear me. The attacks come more frequently then they used to, but when we feel cornered we feel desperate, and the Devil’s desperate to trap me, and all of you in his snares. The Devil is loosing ground every time someone drops to their knees and prays. The Devil lashes out for every person saved, for every marriage reunited, for every forgiving heart that lets go of the wrongs from a loved one. The Devil fears the Christian heart, and thus the Devil turns that fear into rage. When we face fear with love, with hope, we can climb that tallest mountain and see the wonders of this world. Face your fears and grow beyond them. Push yourself to new limits, and watch as the things you thought you could never do now become milestones for you to break through. Fear not for the Lord is always with you. John 14:27 “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” Face your fears, face yourself, and you can rise to new levels. Courage is the remedy for fear. Courage in the face of fears is rising above and not allowing fear to drag you down. Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.” Trust in the Lord, and believe that if the day comes, the Lord will either protect you, or bring you home to paradise. Either or, the outcome is pretty nice. Isaiah 35:4 “say to those with fearful hearts, “Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, he will come with vengeance; with divine retribution he will come to save you.”

 

Build Faithful Wealth

Build Faithful Wealth

The day’s stress builds and it feels crushing. The pain from yesterday seems to creep in and taunt you like a splinter you can’t see. The struggle is real, and it’s a constant battle uphill, but what if I told you, you could lighten your load? So many people are under the impression that the day you become a Christian, and the day you choose to follow the light of Christ, and trust in God that everything is nothing by clear meadows and peaceful streams. The sad reality is, when you become a Christian the struggle is just getting started. When you give your life to God the Devil will try to break you, and knock you down every single chance he gets. You’re a threat to the Devil’s plans and he wants your soul for himself. We Christians have defenses against his attacks, and together we can grow, and mature, and be ready.

We know what God says, and we know how to practice it. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 “16 All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness; 17so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.” If we follow this instruction we may find some peace in the middle of the storm. How can we fight the Devil if we don’t know scripture? How can we mount a defense against the general of the opposing army who’s had thousands of years of practice? The Word of God is the only difference between peace, and despair. The diligence prosper, and we know this from Joshua 1:8 “This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success.”

The thing about having and solidifying your faith is, it takes years. It takes time to push away your flesh, and allow the Holy Spirit to take hold in your heart. I believe that in anything we have in abundance we should share with others. I firmly believe that when we are basking in the faith of Jesus Christ we not only should, but that we have an obligation to share that with others. When you have that kind of faith it’s easy to be happy in the good times, but the true test of being wealthy in the faith is when trouble comes. Peace will come when you have faith and trust in the Lord. You will believe that even in the hard times the Lord is in control, and you will allow yourself to not worry as much. The idea in our life of Christ is to live like no one else, so when God calls you home one day you can live in Heaven like no one else.

When we are graced with God’s love, we should feel those blessings in everything that surrounds us. When we receive that blessing, we should ultimately become a blessing to those around us. We should hope to help improve the lives in which we touch. It should be our goal to help enrich others lives with the word of God. In this life without faith, we often find that people live their life in fear and desperation. They go from moments of happiness to despair every time a hurdle comes into their path. Life will throw curve balls, and even chasms, but those in the faith bounce back, and manage far better then those without. Life is hard on everyone no matter what walk of life you come from. Trouble will hit everyone because it doesn’t discriminate. God has entrusted us with the Word, the Sword, so if we have the key to peace, and contentment, we should, we are commanded to follow the Great Commission. When we get good news in our life we want to share it, but the best news we could ever get is the word of God and we shy away from talking about it with others for fear of judgment, shame on us. Psalm 24:1 “The earth is the LORD’s and the fullness thereof, the world and those who dwell therein,” We are called to share the word of God, but when we sit on it, we are not good stewards of God’s word. The blessings we get from above we should be great stewards of. We should be stewards of God’s money, love, grace, and forgiveness. Instead we remain silent and don’t stand for anything. We sit on the fence and watch as the world passes us by. We pray for those who find themselves in crisis but what are we doing before the crisis hits? Are we making positive change in our communities with the word of our King? Giving love, charity, can be a humbling experience, but we as Christians don’t even tithe like we should, let alone give love abundantly. God is the greatest giver in history, and when we think about it, God gave his one and only Son to save us. His son became the sacrifice, and that sacrifice became the full outpouring of God’s wrath upon Christ. How much that must have hurt God, and yet he so loved the world of Man, he would do that. God has given us hope when we had none. He’s given us purpose, and love, and how do we repay that love? How do we give love, and charity to those we know are in need? It’s a proven fact that less selfish people will prosper more, and when we give our love freely, without expecting something in return, you will find yourself far more happy, far more content in the world.

Malachi 3:11 “I will rebuke the devourer for you, so that it will not destroy the fruits of your soil, and your vine in the field shall not fail to bear, says the LORD of hosts.” We must have faith that God will be there for us, and in return we give our best first to the Lord. We will be blessed when we use God’s blessings to be pleasing. No matter where we find our selves, whether it’s the TSA taking something that doesn’t belong to them ie: a computer charging cable, or a loss of a job, or even a death in the family, know that God is working on it all. We must be faithful with our gifts, and faithful in our troubles. Be ready for the day the battle knocks on your door because we cannot watch from the sidelines and think we’ll never be a target. I find that the attack comes when you least expect it. I knew this time however that after a great week of soul searching, of finding myself in God’s love and grace, that the Devil would be upset and angry. I knew that the attack was coming, and sure enough, it came. In fact it came right in the middle of me writing this particular post. I was blind sided by someone, and I took a step back, I removed myself from my surroundings, I re-centered, and even though it hurt, I didn’t let it destroy my day. I can’t say much for my younger self, but to me this shows growth. I have come to see myself as more then I was. I have come to see that I am God’s faithful archer. I am God’s Al-Sahim (The Arrow).

 

 

The Uneven Path

The Uneven Path

A journey walked with the Lord may not be a smooth path, but often in life it’s the uneven path that leads to the most reward. We can see this in nature also. Recently I was in South Carolina and on a hike, once off the beaten path I found myself climbing a cliff to get to the middle of the top of a waterfall. It took strength, faith, and courage, but once on the top, despite the risk, it was worth it. To sit in the middle of a 75-foot or more waterfall was amazing. The serenity it brought was astonishing. Without taking the time to follow the uneven path, the wonders of what was hidden in the forest would not have been seen. Getting there wasn’t easy, but the beauty I saw with my own eyes was worth every struggle.

I’ve put a lot of thought in the paths of life. Many people choose to just go with the flow, but although it may be easier, and offer less in the way of pain, do we ever reach our true potential if we don’t push ourselves? Psalm 25:4-5 “4 Make me to know your ways, O Lord; teach me your paths. 5 Lead me in your truth and teach me, for you are the God of my salvation; for you I wait all the day long.” The path we choose to take may often show God our true nature. Are we the type to make the right decision no matter who’s watching? Do we have a sense of dignity, or integrity? Integrity is “doing the right thing even when no one’s watching.” It’s not easy walking the path of righteousness, but God see’s not just our actions, but also the content of our heart. The path of Christ is a difficult one. The trials that come to those who are followers of our Lord and Savior can often be crushing. If we are saved however, the worst they can do is break us down. While we aren’t perfect, and we feel, the life we live will have it’s obstacles. The thing with the uneven path is the beauty that lies beyond the struggle. Nothing in this life is free, and often the biggest reward comes from the most effort.

Sometimes to get the chance to see the view you have to climb the rugged path. We never know our true capability until we challenge ourselves. We never know what we’re made of till we are pushed to our limit and then beyond. When we are put in a position to throw our comfort zone out the window, and face the bitter cold water, the rugged root path, the freezing cold rapids, we see what we’re made of. This last week I watched as my fellow veteran brothers as they were pushed to their limits, and then beyond. From a fear of heights, debilitating, and yet no matter what it was, everyone, every single person, pushed themselves beyond what they thought they could manage, and overcame their threshold. It was beautiful watching men rediscover their inner boyhood, and heal wounds long overdue.

Jeremiah 17:14 “Heal me, O LORD, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise.” In all things Christ can heal. In the will of God nothing is to big, nothing is to small. We praise our Lord and Savior and we follow Christ, the healing power of those waters can heal the wounds of our hearts. Being damaged is not the end of the road but the beginning of a new. In the morning you will wake up and you will feel the flame, and you will feel yourself on fire. The Holy Spirit can move you, heal you, and shape you. The hurt from our rugged path can feel crushing, but as we forge steel, the fire burns away the impurities, and what’s left is a sword of righteousness. Let that path shape you, let it move you beyond the norm, and find yourself among the hidden beauty in the woods. God’s waiting for you, and the day your path leads you to that clearing, and you see the fire, grab on tight, and don’t loose hope, don’t loose faith, let it burn away all the things you aren’t. Find your path to Christ and get up and move. Your path can lead you to wide wonders, or disaster. We have so many choices in our life, every thought, to feeling, to action, what do we choose to do with our time? When we spend our days struggling to make sense of what’s wrong on the inside, are we making a choice to sit in our sorrow, or are we lost in it? I think it’s a little of both. In our walk, especially mine with PTSD, some days the best I can achieve is getting out of bed and opening my eyes. Other days I’m on fire for the Lord and I go out and preach my heart out. It’s a roller coaster for sure, but every day we have is a gift. We are more today then we were yesterday. Every day our brain is filled with the food we put in to it. We can fill our brain with positive thoughts that grow us, thoughts that make us better, or, we can fuel our mind with doubt, anger, hate, and sorrow. Making the change isn’t easy, but it can be done. See when we are trying to change the way we think, when we are trying to change the fundamentals of our thoughts, it’s an uneven, rocky path.

Here’s the thing we all need to remember, Christ washed away the worst parts of our journey for us. The blood of Christ spilt turned the impassible gorge of hellfire and brimstone, to a bridge of light. We have hope now in our walk, and though there will be obstacles to challenge us along the way, there’s nothing we can’t overcome. We may have to take the path less traveled, but as long as we keep our Azimuth north, and we check and recheck our path, we will one day reach the bridge of light. Sure we’ll have some small cliffs, maybe some wild animals to contend with, but no matter what we face, we know that the Lord of all creation is with us. We know that God can do wonderful things because of how many points we can turn to in scripture. Jesus calms the storm, or Jesus turning water into aged wine. We must have faith in our walk and know that in our time of need, our prayers will be heard. Matthew 17:20 “He said to them, “Because of your little faith. For truly, I say to you, if you have faith like a grain of mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move, and nothing will be impossible for you.” No matter the difficulty we face, tomorrow is a new day. If we can just get through the day, sometimes even the moment, the next one will come. Life can be hard, and sometimes people question this life we live. Life is always, always worth living. We never know what this journey has to offer, and although the journey may be strong some days, the beauty that awaits us later is worth every ounce of pain today. Have hope and look to tomorrow. Trust in the Lord that he is with you, near you, helping you and guiding you. We must learn to remove ourselves from the voice in the wind that lies to us. The Devil will try many different ways to break you down, but you must remain strong, keep the faith, and focus on the goals.

Recently I found myself in a situation I was very uncomfortable. I was freezing, and wet. I couldn’t feel my toes, and my hands felt like they where stuck in a particular position, but in my head, I forced the negative feelings out, and I kept focusing on the task at hand. I focused on my brothers in my raft, and keeping them on task, motivated. I reassured, and led from the front. Each one of my brothers struggled in different ways, and despite our hurt, we came together and accomplished our task. It’s amazing how no matter where you find yourself, your brain has the ability to compensate and get you through. Face your fears, and face your inner demons. Find your purpose by searching God’s word, and God’s grace. You are perfectly made by our Father, and you have been given gifts to use for the Glory of our King. Don’t be scared of the journey, instead be afraid of what you might miss if you don’t take it. There is so much beauty in this world, and we need to be willing to take the chance to see it. We can’t foresee what tomorrow may bring, but we can’t allow the unknown to scare us away from greatness. We only get to live this life once, and the worst life can do is end, if that happens we know if Jesus is our rock, our center, the end for this life is just the beginning of a better one after. Paradise awaits us for those willing to take the uneven path.

 

 

Rested

Rested

 After a year and some change of writing it became clear to me a vacation was needed. I only intended to post for a year and one day, but as fate would have it, when that time came I was compelled to write and post. God however is not without a certain sense of humor. 16 days after my last blog I was suppose to write I was selected to attend a project Odyssey, hosted by Wounded Warrior Project. What I had planned was to write and blog my experiences, but instead I found poor cell phone signal, and no Internet. Fate it seems was for me to take a vacation like it or not.

The week would be a week I will not likely forget anytime soon. I found something along the way, and lost something also. I would face many challenges along my journey, my own odyssey. As I would go from day to day I would face it and it forced me to search and dig deep inside myself. While the physical challenges wouldn’t come till Wednesday, the emotional gut check started nearly right away. The entire Odyssey I would face my emotional challenge of not withdrawing into myself. I have always felt that I never truly fit in, even around people I knew for years. Finding my place has always been a challenge for me. For me the trials it seems has been in my own head, and not founded in reality. I didn’t realize this until September 21st 2016. I was faced with this reality and it forced me to do some deep internal soul searching. As my journey to find and make new friends seemed to be failing, God again, is not without a sense of humor. In one week I would make 13 new brothers, and find my own place within the group. I would go from Mango to Preacher. I would make a transformation and I would realize that I have a place in this world. I would meet a man that I would have such a close connection to because of our personal connection. We have influenced one another’s lives despite not ever meeting. It’s clear to me that God has been working in my life to bring a thousand pieces together.

Sometimes in our life we need to take a step back, and refocus our place. For me, this week gave me the opportunity to learn from others going through similar and worse situations then myself. The ability to step back and learn what it means to be a child of the King is so important. We are all important to God and how we choose to act, and behave is important. I hope in the following weeks I’m able to take what I have found and what I’ve learned, and put it to use within my daily blogs and more importantly my daily walk in Christ. Going forward without the set standard to post daily, now I will post when I am ready to post. Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” I know finding rest in today’s world is hard. We are a go society, and the idea of actually taking time off to rest, for many is a foreign ideal. The thing is we can easily become wrapped up in life and forget to live.

For years I have struggled to find myself, and feel at peace with the battle waging within. I saw myself in the mirror and questioned much. Facing the pain of if I fit in or not, and questioning my own self worth, I came to find peace this week. It’s not easy to live in the positivity and forcing a change in personality to be a person of light instead of darkness. From the time we have a thought, to the feeling, to action, we have the ability to make a choice to how we allow something to affect us. We are faced with perspective all the time in life, but with practice we can get better with not letting as much bother us, or at the very least, how long we allow it to stay in our lives. Peace, is a blessing, and a gift when it comes. Psalm 4:8 “In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, LORD, make me dwell in safety.” Jesus Christ is the way, the truth, the life, and in our life, our faith will be what we have to grip to when the road gets bumpy. When you are lost, you must first rest to collect your thoughts. Take time to meditate on the word, slow your breathing, and re-center. When you are lost and weary rest your head on the lap of Abba. I went seeking friendship, but what I found was a friend within myself. I found a piece of myself that I thought was long forgotten. I am a warrior and I’m a warrior for Christ. I am worth more then I think I am, and in Jesus I am going to inherit paradise. I have been saved by the blood, and living in the living waters of the Holy Spirit gives me peace. Find your grace and peace. Find your breath, and follow the light. Take time every day to rest your mind in prayer and meditation. I think every day we need to take a short time and focus on our mental health. Give our brain time to rest. Don’t get lost in the world, get lost in the Word of God. I now have 13 Brothers to hold me accountable. I found more on my Odyssey then I ever imagined I could. I am worth while, I am a Warrior, and I am a child of the King.