Gods still in control, God will stand

Gods still in control, God will stand

We see the world around us and we come to conclusions. Everywhere we look we see a world full of hate, anger, mistrust, pain, and suffering, but it’s in those events we see the world through the eyes of someone who’s life has created a particular opinionated vantage point. The life we live is not by chance, but by design. God gives us our life and pushes us with intent to give us a good life. There are a lot of reasons why bad things happen, but above all things, God is in control.

We live in a world that right now feels like it’s falling apart. We see rioting in the streets and we see death and war on the news every day. Even as we speak Houston Texas is under water and thousands of lives are displaced and as those lives will never be the same. With the world as it is, we must remember that no matter who is president, no matter what our elected officials do, we must know that God is still on the throne, God is still in control, and we must learn to have faith even when the walls are crumbling down, when the rain is falling on our heads, and when we feel like we can’t carry on, God is in control.

Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.”

Romans 8:28 “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Isaiah 41:10 “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

No matter how deeply we struggle with our worries, and our anxiety, we must remember that our lives while they are our own from free will, we don’t have to travel down the road God wants for us. One way or another God’s will, will be done, and we can either do it the easy way or the hard way. “What has happened to a nation that used to fear the Lord, to a people who’s foundation was built upon God’s word. We’ve aloud the worlds opinion to chart a different way, but it’s time the Church of Jesus Christ should boldly stand and say. GODS WORD WILL STAND, AGAINST THE RAGING TIDE, AGAINST THOSE WHO CRITISIZE, AND WORK THEIR EVIL PLANS, GODS WORLD WILL STAND AGAINST THE GATES OF HELL, WITH POWER TO PREVAIL, IN THE HEARTS OF MAN, GODS WORD WILL STAND. They can take it from the courthouse walls, remove it from the schools, teach our children that we are animals, speak against the golden rule, try and hide our Christian heritage from the public eye, but they will never overcome Gods word no matter how they try!” (God’s word will stand, The Inspirations)

No matter where we are, the horrible or the great things that happens, God is still and always sitting on the throne. We must remember to have faith in our times of need, and thank God for being sovereign no matter when. Today, tomorrow, and always, God is God and we are nothing without Him.

 

Loss

Loss

The losses I’ve seen have been immeasurable. The battle always wages on inside us. The sights and sounds of the war still rage on. You close your eyes and the weapons flash, the sounds of explosions and the feel of the blast vibrate through your chest. The sights of burnt pieces of metal, a whole so deep in the ground you picture men placing the objects of death in the hole dug. No matter how hard you try the faces never leave you. The smells invade the memory and create a feeling of nausea you just can’t fight. The heart pumping quickly ever memory of explosions along with the fear from the RPG’s flying over head, the bullets ricocheting off the driver door, the, and the weight of the wheel when you can barely fight the truck your driving. The dead haunt me, and the living spites me.

The air is warm, and the sun shines down to the world below. The feeling of the pistol the handgrips textured, the trigger smooth and light. The black smooth slide almost reflective the last things seen before the flash. The blood pools and drains down the shirt. The air sucked from the lungs as the world turns black. To see the blackness of nothing, a voice slips between the lips. ‘God I’m sorry.’ As the thunder struck, the voice shook the world, ‘You’re forgiven.’ Waking in pain so bad death would be a release. The weight of the world now crushing down, the future bleak and dark, but is that a light at the end of the tunnel?

A divorce rips apart a life. The feeling of betrayal, the aching of emotions feels physical. The lowness of the barrel, only to be repeated twice, twice the pain, and no the second time wasn’t easier. Loosing loves twice by way of affairs hurts down into the pit of your stomach like nothing I ever felt. But sad to say this wasn’t the only pain I would feel.

Growing up, I experienced a couple traumatic events, I won’t go into detail now. Just know that the pain felt as a child was confusing, and difficult. The only truth was God was always there watching over me, helping me through it, even if God was the farthest thing from my mind at the time. The struggles of an 11 year old trying to understand the cruelty of the world is difficult, and harsh. Why would a loving God allow such pain and suffering upon the innocents of a child?

Between watching loved ones die, loosing family, loosing friends, being close to death myself, the truth remains that in the vastness of loss and heartache the Lord is still on the throne. Every situation both good and bad that forces us down a path, we must remember to thank God for everything we have no matter what it is. God is not evil, and God doesn’t bring hardships unless we need the lessons. No matter the cost we must endure the hardships in front of us. Our lives can be the ice storm, or the thaw after, if we focus on the right path.

Being displaced, and having everything ripped away, everything one would hold most dear in life is something no one should have to endure, especially twice. While we all will face grief and suffering the difference is the sheer number of events, and the intensity of each one. While the truth is plain no matter who we are pain and suffering are bound to happen. We were promised pain, and suffering, trials, and we were promised the thorns and thistles, but in all of that we were also promised grace, peace, and love. Gods grace is sometimes all we have, and that grace in the wake of loss has to be enough, because if it’s not, we are left with no hope, and if we have no hope, life is lost.

Do you know what time it is?

Do you know what time it is?

The clock ticks and we take our breaths. The time we have a predator that stalks us, the invisible enemy that we cannot see. We are born and from the first breath we take that day life begins we never know when our last breath will be on our last day. As our days are numbered we are always racing the clock. Our salvation is only good if we accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and savior. The key is doing it before your end comes, because of our limited time we cant waist what time we have. Our salvation is a precious jewel that must be cherished, and we must respect the gift given to us, and never take that time for granted.

Ecclesiastes 7 “A good name is better than precious ointment, and the day of death than the day of birth.It is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting, for this is the end of all mankind, and the living will lay it to heart.Sorrow is better than laughter, or by sadness of face the heart is made glad.The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth. It is better for a man to hear the rebuke of the wise than to hear the song of fools. For as the crackling of thorns under a pot, so is the laughter of the fools; this also is vanity.[a] Surely oppression drives the wise into madness, and a bribe corrupts the heart. Better is the end of a thing than its beginning, and the patient in spirit is better than the proud in spirit. Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the heart[b] of fools.10 Say not, “Why were the former days better than these?” For it is not from wisdom that you ask this.11 Wisdom is good with an inheritance, an advantage to those who see the sun.12 For the protection of wisdom is like the protection of money, and the advantage of knowledge is that wisdom preserves the life of him who has it. 13 Consider the work of God: who can make straight what he has made crooked?”

Living a life in the moment and not taking them for granted is part of the recipe for a happy life. Allowing God to be in every moment, every tick of the clock of your life, and making choices that fit the Holy Spirit. Sometimes we look at our life and we find joy in the worst of circumstances. We look to things to make our lives better, often to make us feel good, or replace heartache with bad choices. Those choices are only temporary. The hardships we face should point us towards God like a loaded gun. When we are happy how often do we go to God in prayer? How often do those sick and dying turn to God for help, for comfort? When we are in sorrow or hurt, we must remember that all bad things are either to teach or push us. All things are allowed by God no matter if it comes from others, or ourselves. Bad choices may be avoidable if we use our time wisely and give glory to God. Don’t allow ones self to waist the precious time we have. Instead use our time to glorify God we never know the day of our last breath, so don’t watch the hands tick by in front of you. Have faith even when we don’t understand the pain, or the plan.

The Wages of Sin

The Wages of Sin

Since the fall from grace and Sin entered the world people have lived under the influence of Sin. Genesis 3:3-4 but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” Mankind was tricked into allowing Satan to pull us from God’s grace. Ever since mankind has made one bad call after another. We consistently have moved in bad directions, we treat our neighbors horribly, we even treat our loved ones with disdain.

If we live our lives in a manner that is not pleasing to the Lord, a life that is against the simple commandments, we are forced to face the ramifications of our ignorance, or blatant disregard. Romans 6:23 “For the wages of sin is death, but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Each of us gambles with our souls when we choose sin over life. Each of us puts our trust in something we will never see first hand. We believe that God is sovereign and on the throne over all. The flip side of course is what happens when we sin on purpose. Romans 5:12 “Wherefore, as by one man sin entered into the world, and death by sin; and so death passed upon all men, for that all have sinned:” When we sin when we turn our backs on Christ and walk a path of wrongdoing, we can look forward to the words in Revelation 21:8 “But the fearful, and unbelieving, and the abominable, and murderers, and whoremongers, and sorcerers, and idolaters, and all liars, shall have their part in the lake which burneth with fire and brimstone: which is the second death.”

The joys of the world, the draws of sinful nature can be enticing and often pulls us from the graces of Christ. We must remember that Christ paid for our sins under the condition we follow Him. Every one of us is given a choice. John 3:36 “He that believeth on the Son hath everlasting life: and he that believeth not the Son shall not see life; but the wrath of God abideth on him.” We can’t negotiate at the foot of the cross. All sin is created and judged equally to God. We must answer for our sins regardless of our beliefs, and yet on our best day we sin, we fall short, and sometimes we hurt those closest to us. We will always hurt those closest to us by accident, but it’s when we do it on purpose that has a particular rank. When we knowingly sin in the efforts to gain our own selfish desires, we risk it all. We never know when the end will come for us. We never know when the good Lord will end our lives. It may be when we are old and gray in our beds, or it may be the next time we go walking outside our door, either way, we wager our eternal lives on the pursuit that the Devil promised all those years ago. We know good and evil, and the world is surly evil. We see people doing good works in the name of the Lord, but even those who do good works can fall from grace. Don’t turn your back on the Lord when times get tough. Don’t believe the lies of Lucifer, and don’t let go of your salvation just for the joys of Sin.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Rugged Path

The rugged path

A path we walk so deep into the wilderness. The stones piled high to block the traveler. Trucks and sticks, thistles and thorns, are but some of the dangers set upon the traveler. The nighttime brings the howls and the moon. What little chance does the traveler have against the predators of the dark to navigate the path with so many hazards? The traveler’s alone no partner or friend, no one to navigate, no one to bare the truths. The path at night is scary and brings a fright. The traveler walks and fear both good and evil takes hold. Fear can paralyze us, stop us from moving, fear when unchecked unmatched can bury us in our tracks. The path’s dangers are many, and we stub our toe, we scrape our knees, we take thorns to the face, but we keep driving on. Fear of death can push us to continue, and fear can keep us fighting if we only see right now. Of all the things we fear on the path, the internal battle is often more scary and more dangerous. What if we fail and we can’t figure out how to get back up? What if we are doomed to walk this earth alone because someone left us? What if loss is our fate and we will never be happy again? Fear can be manifest on our path, fear of all these things can present themselves as stumbling blocks, thorns, wolves, and darkness. The fear we have are lies from the deceiver himself. Some way, some how, we must learn to light up our path, and allow the light to reveal the secrets of the dark.

2 Corinthians 4:6 “It started when God said, “Light up the darkness!” and our lives filled up with light as we saw and understood God in the face of Christ, all bright and beautiful.” We must have faith in the Lord. We know that God lit up the darkness, and we know that we lived in darkness till we were saved by it. John 1:5 “The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” Jesus Christ gave us the hope we didn’t have since the fall from Eden. We know that Abba (father) is kind and just. We know that Christ made the winds stop and the storm to pass. Isaiah 26:7-11 “Lord, you make the path smooth for good people; the road they travel is level. 8 We follow your will and put our hope in you; you are all that we desire. 9At night I long for you with all my heart; when you judge the earth and its people, they will all learn what justice is. 10 Even though you are kind to the wicked, they never learn to do what is right. Even here in a land of righteous people they still do wrong; they refuse to recognize your greatness. 11 Your enemies do not know that you will punish them. Lord, put them to shame and let them suffer; let them suffer the punishment you have prepared. Show them how much you love your people. “ We know that our fate was sealed but the innocent blood of Christ saved us. We know that now our fate is within our own power of free will. We know the power of God to shape our path is stronger then we could ever possibly hope to imagine. Isaiah 40:4 “Every valley shall be lifted up, and every mountain and hill be made low; the uneven ground shall become level, and the rough places a plain.” Light up the path, remove the stones, the thistles, the thorns, the trunks that would reach up and grab you and hold you down will withers and flatten out.

Having faith and letting go of the pain, the suffering within our heart, is hard, but we can overcome the darkness inside us if we work on it daily, practice it and telling ourself every day that we can put one foot in front of the other. Sometimes one foot in front of the other is all we can do. Every single day we must ask God to take that pain, take the traps on the path we walk and remove them from our hike through the world. Our faith is something we must continue to work on, every day we will find ourselves under attacked from the Devil’s lies, the Devil’s tricks, the Devil’s temptations, and we must allow ourselves to fight the fight with the help of God. We cannot fight the Devil alone and we will loose if we choose to get into the ring with Him and try to go one on one. We must always keep in mind we are nothing without God, we achieve nothing without the grace of God and we cannot make our way through the rugged terrain without the blessings God bestows upon us. This path we walk there will be bloodshed, there will be tears and no matter how the path gets us down, allow God to pick you back up always, and you will see that even in the hardships you will feel the grace of God.

 

 

 

 

Finding my Black Canary

Finding my Black Canary

Do many of you often wonder where you other half is? As I have often wondered what the next step in my life may be, I question the range of relationships. While I’ve wondered why the women I have loved have decided to move on with their lives and leave the life built behind them, I consistently struggle with the reason for this particular path. While the why isn’t the focus here the focus is how do we move forward? Sometimes we love and loose, how do we begin to fix our broken hearts?

Psalm 34:18 “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.”

Psalm 147: 3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

Romans 8:39 “nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

1 John 4:10 “In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.”

Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

 When we are down and broken we know that the Lord is with us and our crushed spirits. We can only rely on the spirit to pick us back up. The Lord starts to heal us the instant the stab to our heart happens. Just because wrongs are done, and they may be done by us, or to us, neither wrong can separate us from the Lord. Jesus is hand in hand with us no matter what. The God above, the creator of heaven and earth, forgives our sins and it is the love of God that give us strength. We are nothing without God, and without God’s grace. Everything we have is a gift. Either God gives us our gifts, or sends us along our path. Either God sends us our pain, or allows our pain to happen. No matter what the case may be, all things happen with the blessing of God. God only allows us to travel a path as long as He deems fit. Sin will only be tolerated in our lives for so long before we will be punished by our Father. How long will we blatantly Sin in our lives before we realize we are wrong and fix it?

Psalm 71:20 “You who have made me see many troubles and calamities will revive me again; from the depths of the earth you will bring me up again.” No matter how far we fall, no matter how deeply we hurt, God will lift us up again and help us heal. We aren’t meant to be alone. Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overwhelm you; when you walk through fire you shall not be burned, and the flame shall not consume you.” No matter our situation we shouldn’t allow ourselves to become overwhelmed. We need to learn to let go of our sorrows and allow the Lord to take care of them. We must endure our crucibles to survive them. We must learn that our gifts will far outweigh our pain and suffering.

For me I believed I had found my Black Canary to my Green Arrow. I believed I had found the woman who completed me. I never wanted anyone else. I felt in my days like I was missing something, like I needed friends to complete what I perceived as missing. The fact was I wasn’t truly looking for friends the truth was I was still dealing with the ramifications of multiple posttraumatic events in my life. Loosing the woman I loved, the woman I would have done anything for and fought to give anything I could. There were many reasons she left, most of which I don’t know, and even to this day don’t understand. However, as broken as I am, I feel badly for her. As I pray one day she may remember the spark that led us together to start with, allow us to rekindle what was damaged. Anything is possible if you believe in Christ. While I have struggled with my ability to move on I have to have faith in the unknown. I believe that no matter the time that goes by if two people are meant to be together life will somehow draw them back together. Love is undying, love is forever, but everything is in God’s time. Some day I will find my woman in a mask to match my own. One day I will find a woman who will don the mask and put on the jacket. I will keep the faith as all of you out there have lived through loss and divorce. Divorce doesn’t have to be the end. Trust in the Lord and in Him your future will be, as the sun shall rise. We must learn patience and in that patience trust that in God’s time someone will come into your life. Remember to put God first, and always. Believe in the Lord and don’t forget to pray. I myself struggle with the patience of such things. Even with that struggle I pray and know that prayer is important in our daily relationship with the Lord our Father. 1 John 5:14-15 “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.” Have trust in our prayers being heard for Abba is with us always.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dead or Alive

Dead or Alive

The wanted poster nailed to the wall with your picture, it says Wanted Dead or Alive. We live our life some choose good, while some choose bad. We fight to move, we move to survive. While this world is a jungle with traps everywhere you look trying to drag you to your knees. We try to survive by doing what our conscious, our moral compass tells us is the right thing to do. Some people their compass allows them to hurt anyone around them. Some live to serve others, and others just want to get by and be left alone, but the jungle doesn’t discriminate, it lies and waits for anyone to fall into it’s trap, like quicksand it grabs you and pulls you down until you are covered and can no longer breathe. The world’s jungle doesn’t judge you, it tries to destroy everyone, and attempts to bring everyone down. The truth is the world doesn’t care if you’re dead or alive because the world is Sin. The Devil is like the Sheriff in Robin Hood. This is a character that always tries to trap and capture the good man Robin Hood and the Merry Men who only want to help those who can’t help themselves. The Devil wants to corrupt the hearts of man. The Devil wants to draw you away from the path of righteousness and doesn’t care how. You see the Devil wants you dead or alive. The Devil wants you to spread evil and hate, and if you won’t, the Devil doesn’t care how he breaks you. Either you spread the hate, or deny Christ, either way the Devil wants you to die doing one of the other that way you never enter the eternal gates of Heaven.

How do we overcome our death sentence, and how do we survive the jungle? God can save us and has saved us from the chains that once bound us to eternal damnation. The chains were broken when innocent blood was spilt, an innocent man was killed as an inadvertent sacrifice to the Lord above on Passover. The Pharisees who killed Jesus didn’t understand his purpose, they didn’t understand the very scripture they had spent a lifetime learning and teaching. The Lord of all went to trial and on trumped up charges accepted the sentence of torture and crucifixion. Jesus knew the sentence, he allowed the temptation to occur in the garden and still denying the Devil three times and then allowed the Roman soldiers to take action against him. Knowing he was going to die the most painful death, he found it in His heart to heal the very roman soldier that had come to take him to his death. He healed the soldier whose ear had been cut off. Forgiveness was still in His heart. The blood spilt that day before the sun had set fulfilled scripture. The eclipse and the earthquake that split the temple tapestry that symbolized the curtain between man and God was no more. While the Devil wanted mankind to die because of jealousy, because of hate, because of sin, the Devil wanted mankind to never have the relationship with God, never wanted mankind to be allowed to where the Devil was banished. Since the Devil wasn’t able to prevent the sacrificial lamb from His fate, now the Devil continues to fight for the souls of mankind.

While the Devil wants us dead or alive, Jesus promised life. We have the opportunity to live and avoid the death sentence the Devil would want for us. Salvation is simple yet difficult at the same time. Sin is strong and pulls at us always. Why does someone have a casual relationship with the truth and lies so easily and frequently? Why is murder so easy for some? Why is hate and bigotry so simple for some? Sin takes so many lives. There’s no real way to know the casualties of war. When we watch someone die we can only hope and assume they were saved. Do you feel cold and lost in desperation? Are you lost because sadness and frustration is all you’ve ever known? We must learn to let it go, and see the light above the clouds. While the war rages on day in and day out, always know that just because you can’t see the sun through the clouds doesn’t mean it isn’t there. You’ve felt the cold and evil pull of Satan, but if you trust that one day the clouds will split because the Lord of the Universe has promised to defeat Sin, promised to cast the deceiver down into the vast pit of Hell and create a new Heaven and a New Earth where there will be no more sorrow, and no more tears. Let it go, let go of all the pain that stains your heart, let go of the hate that sits in your heart. Let go of your desperation and remember that just because you can’t see or feel God, doesn’t mean He isn’t with you always. Hope is a fragile thing, but scripture rings truth. Remember all the promises God has made to us. Don’t allow yourself to fall to the traps within this jungle. We never know when the end will come and we don’t want to fall into a trap before we accept Christ into our hearts. We know our salvation rests within Christ so be sure to keep your salvation packed away tucked in tight so you don’t loose it, but to have it means to use it, if you don’t use it you could loose it.

Exodus 14:14 “The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

Isaiah 40:29 “He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.”

Isaiah 40:31 “but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.”

Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

Deuteronomy 31:8 “The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Psalm 23 1 The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters.3 He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. 4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 5You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 6 Surelygoodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LORD forever.”

 Have faith in the Lord. Remember that just because charges may be brought against you that doesn’t mean you’re guilty. Remember that you will stand trial and the sins will be weighed at the foot of the cross. Never let Satan take your hope from you for as long as God is God, and God is still on the throne there is always hope. Let there be no mistake God is still in control, and just because the bad things that happen to us, and it seems like the end of the world God can and does always use every situation for a chance for us to bring Glory to His name. Never forget who the judge is. You and I aren’t it, and Satan certainly isn’t it even though he is the corrupt lawyer trying to get your death sentence sped up. Thee Judge on high sees right through Him. Jesus was our defense lawyer and no wicked sheriff or prosecutor will be able to get past the righteousness of our Father.

“Let mercy come and wash away what I’ve done. I’ll face myself to cross out what I’ve become.” “For what I’ve done I start again And whatever pain may come Today this ends I’m forgiving what I’ve done I’ll face myself to cross out what I’ve become Erase myself And let go of what I’ve done” (Linkin Park) Remember that asking God for forgiveness, asking others for forgiveness, is only part of it. We must learn to forgive ourselves also. We will make mistakes we’re human. If you’re going to be placed on trial be sure to only face the charges that are yours face. Forgiving one’s own mistakes is sometimes harder then accepting it from others so be sure to look inside and face the truth for what it is. Don’t accept responsibility for things you haven’t done, but be man enough to accept the things you have. We all face trial in the end. Do you want to die, or do you want to live? Eternal death, or eternal life, the choice is ours. The life we live is hard, but most of what life is, is just fluff anyway. Learn to tell the stuff that really matters and the stuff that doesn’t. Don’t let the small stuff in this life turn into big stuff at your trial. The little lies, the things like cheating, or stealing may not be big in your eyes but to God all sin is sin. Don’t let man’s laws on importance change your perspective. How you treat others, how you treat yourself, how you live the big and small, the good, the bad, and the ugly will all be presented at your trial and the Devil is just licking his chops waiting for you to sin and keep right on sinning. Do the right thing and have respect for yourself, and for others. You are responsible for your own actions, and what do you want, dead, or alive?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Why do I feel the way I do?

Why do I feel the way I do?

I’ve been considering an awful lot about my future these last few weeks I’ve been in recovery. I’ve been wondering why it’s been so hard to meet new people. I’ve been wondering why every plan I’ve had since my separation started has blown up in my face. I’ve been wondering why every new potential lady I’ve met has ghosted me. What does that say about me? Am I being prepared for something more in the future, or something I’m supposed to learn right here and now? While of course I won’t ever have an answer the questions come regardless.

A verse that popped out at me today Hebrews 4:12 “For the word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any twoedged sword, piercing even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.” While I have begged for a change of heart, a change in the way I feel in certain circumstances, I have yet to overcome a particular character flaw, or at least what I perceive as a flaw. God can see what is in our heart of hearts. He sees beyond the mask we wear and show those around us. God sees everything and knows our deepest thoughts, even the ones we may bury so deep we ourselves don’t see them. The truth in the word can often cut us deep to the bone. My personal experience has led me to feel the conviction on more then one occasion. There was a major event last year that touched me. There was a sermon on forgiveness that I needed to hear just one day after I found out about a serious wrong against me by someone I cared for.

Hebrews 4:13 “Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do.” God knows what we need and when we need it. The right message at the perfect time and when we don’t listen to the word the message is sent to us one way or another, and perhaps by force. The Father wants what’s best for us, and sometimes when the father wants to teach children a particular lesson you have to have a more stern teaching method. Though I’m not a father, and I never had a father, I pay attention to the fathers of my close friends. As I have often felt bitter about the way my life has gone, the hardships I’ve faced and I am forced to remind myself that scripture is full of those who went through so much pain prior to death. Moses, Joseph, Stephen, Paul, David (Prior to becoming King), and of course the suffering and crucifixion of Jesus Christ. If my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ could go through torture, relinquishing any pride, and knowing what was at stake, our immortal souls free from eternal damnation.

Knowing all of this, why do I still feel like I’m not good enough? Romans 7:14-20 “For we know that the law is spiritual, but I am of the flesh, sold under sin. 15 For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. 16 Now if I do what I do not want, I agree with the law, that it is good.17 So now it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me. 18 For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.” Knowing I am special and unique because I am of God’s creation does not stop my own self worth being in question. Perhaps the biggest issue is the built in flaw that we see as a flaw, but what if that flaw isn’t a flaw at all. 2 Corinthians 12:7 “So to keep me from becoming conceited because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, a thorn was given me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to harass me, to keep me from becoming conceited.” While I am always willing to admit I’m wrong, and I may be on the built in flaw aspect, it would make sense to ensure we aren’t conceited. For me my biggest failing is my self worth, and the need for social interaction. I guess one of the biggest things to face is the problem, and admitting there is one, or at least something to work on. While it’s very possible that these flaws are there to give us something to always work on. None of us are perfect because we can’t be. Sin prevents perfection and the sooner we realize what our flaws are, accept them, and focus on fixing them to the best of our ability we can realize we are exactly as God created us.

Every waking day we fight because the battle doesn’t stop just because we don’t want to fight anymore. While I would love nothing more to drop off the grid, if I could manage the solitude I have often questioned if anyone would miss me. I have often questioned if I could get over my social requirements if I could actually survive out on my own. I have questioned if I could manage to live on a boat by myself on the sea, in a cabin in the woods, and just survive without the influence of the world. The world beats us down and some people have more struggles then others. The path and struggle although painful and full of sacrifice, the end result is something more. We can either embrace the fire or run from it. I feel the way I do because the world has been a cruel and unforgiving place full of pits and spikes, and flaming arrows that have burned down my life more then once. The house can always be rebuilt if the foundation is strong. A tree can be cut back and cut back, but with strong roots it can grow again. When the world burns down the house to the foundation rebuilding takes time. So long as we realize rebuilding can’t and won’t happen over night, we can be in the right mindset that rebuilding is a chance to change, a chance to fix mistakes, make things bigger and stronger then they were before. To purge the old and make way for the new, but there will be hardships along the way, there will be tests, but know that God never allows you to go through the tests until you’re ready to overcome them. Be brave and keep calm, buckle your armor and prepare for the next step, the next chapter and face the enemy head on.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Serenity Prayer

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
As it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
If I surrender to His Will;
So that I may be reasonably happy in this life
And supremely happy with Him
Forever and ever in the next.

Amen.

We in our life often have a hard time with many of our daily trials. I have often found comfort in the Serenity Prayer. First, what does serenity mean? The online definition is “he state of being calm, peaceful, and untroubled.” Even those who are devout Christians can have a hard time letting go of the stress and worry that come with tough situations. While we all have our day to day struggles, some people deal with ‘stress’ better then others. I’ve had my share of exemplary displays of problem solving, and I’ve had some very atrocious displays. We know that we will face trials, those trials will place us on a path to either teach us something, prepare us for something later on down the line, or alter our path. In some scientific circles there’s a theory that for every possible outcome that could happen, actually does happen. While this may or may not be true, if you are God, and you allow mankind to have free will, then there has to be some aspect of that, that might be true, even if God is the only one that can see every possible outcome. We have the opportunity every instance to make Godly decisions. No matter how far down a path, you can choose a different path. There are always options even if we don’t see all of them. Think about what God sees. He wants us to give us every opportunity to follow Him. He wants us to have a relationship with Him so envision every possibly action you may make, and consider the eyes of God seeing every path all at once. How big God is compared to us. I’ve often thought that God will always attempt to get you back on track by giving you chance after chance to get back on track, but with freedom of choice, multiple outcomes must be available, which means God can see every possible outcome, which means, every possible outcome must exist.

Now that I’ve gotten off on a major tangent, I’ll get back to my original point. I often hear people say I don’t have a choice, or I didn’t have a choice, and me myself have said and gone done that road more often then I would care to admit. One thing I’ve learned, even if I don’t always put it into practice is, just because we can’t see an outcome, or see the many paths in front of us, doesn’t mean they aren’t there. We can never know how every situation will end, and we never know truly what tomorrow will bring. We must learn to live our lives one day, one moment at a time. Be proactive sure, but always try to make your choices based on a Godly path. Surrender your worries, your doubts, and your troubles to the Lord. Ask constantly for guidance and believe that the path will illuminate before you when you are truly seeking a righteous path. The right path won’t always be the path of least resistance, but when we follow the Lord we will be given the compass to follow.

Getting rid of worries, and doubt, stress, and frustrations, isn’t easy. It helps to remind yourself daily of the serenity prayer like using the same muscle over and over again, you will eventually build muscle memory and it will become easier. Don’t live your life under a permanent cloud of misery. Allow yourself to be free from that and find the joy in life no matter what situation you find yourself in. Philippians 4:11 “Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.”

 

 

 

 

Shēngcún (Survive)

Shēngcún (Survive)

Survive in Mandarin is Shēngcún. Some days I see some of my friends and they are just barely making it day to day. It makes me thankful for where I am today. I don’t have much, but I have more then some. I am greatly blessed and thankful for what I do have. Though, I don’t want to just survive, I want to thrive.

In life we can sit and live with the bare minimum our potential has to offer, or we can stand up and grab life by the horns and take control. We can’t always plan for the future, but what we can do is attack every problem, every situation with a zeal that pushes us to be our best selves. No matter the troubles, the trials, the knocks that are sure to come, we can chose how we want to live. We may not always be able to fix every problem, but maybe we aren’t supposed to. While we never know what our future may hold, we know we have the ability to alter our perception of each problem. We have the ability to choose our attitude and more importantly how we treat others in every situation we find ourselves in.

I challenge all of you not to just survive but thrive. You can be a light in others lives, and you can be there for others to make their world a better place. We can leave this world a better place by the lives we touch. Psalms 78:4 “We will not hide [them] from their children, shewing to the generation to come the praises of the LORD, and his strength, and his wonderful works that he hath done.” Always keep in mind what you do in all situations may be how you’re remembered for generations, by generations.

I heard a sermon today about David and Bathsheba, and one of the key components was to make sure blame goes to the right place. I have been known to take the blame for things I never did. As my studies in scripture have led me to a better understanding of sin nature, I have found obviously the wrongs done are usually sin influenced. The Devil will place people in our lives to draw us away and sometimes he is successful, sometimes he’s not, but he will always try. When we give in to things like lust, lies, hate, and self we see that sin nature taking hold. We may be able to lie to everyone around us, we may be able to lie to those we love the most but when the day comes and we stand at the foot of God’s alter we will have to answer for everything we’ve done. Nothing will remain hidden, and when we answer to God, we must think in the here and now, what will this do for me later? Don’t just survive, thrive by making Godly choices.