Tag: battles

Persevering with Perseverance 

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Persevering with perseverance 

In recent weeks, or months, I have felt that I have failed in life. With the changes in my health, which put me in the hospital for a couple weeks, the fundamental breakdowns within important relationships in my life, and the lackluster direction of my eldest half-sibling relationship. I have felt heart broken, betrayed, sad, lost, and angry, plus perhaps a few more emotions I haven’t discussed yet with myself. The flood of emotions that comes with open-heart surgery are many and extensive. I’ve been trying to face and manage all that’s happened but truthfully, while in some areas I’ve excelled, in others I’ve failed a bit. I’ve asked recently how so much has gone so wrong. I’ve asked God how much He thinks I can handle. I know many say “God will never give you more than you can handle”, but in reality, that’s not at all what the scripture says. That scripture in 1 Corinthians 10:13 says this “13 No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.” Our way out is putting our trust and faith in Jesus. We find comfort in Jesus and he see’s us through the storm. It’s the truth, when i say I’ve been under constant attack by the enemy. Satan, has been putting in a great deal of hours making my life miserable these last several months. The truth is, God will allow us to go through all the world throws at us, because we are to rely on His strength, not our own. We are to turn to God and follow “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

— Matthew 11:28-30. We fight daily, and go from one battle to the next. Our faith tells us that we have been given a spirit of courage, and not of fear, and if we are to be soldiers, we must learn to hone that courage, and face our fears. We must face them till we have control over it. When I was in the military we go through extensive desensitization training, so when we actually get shot at, or blown up, our flight-fight response honed, and not easily triggered. We trained, and we trained, and we prepared knowing the fight was going to come. As Christians, we know that the fight is going to come, because the Lord told us as much, but we rarely prepare for anything. 

Preparing for the fight, and actively learning, and growing in the Lord is as important as breathing. If we are to live, and live well, we must learn to fight well, and be prepared for anything that may come our way. When we consider the nature of our enemy, we must consider the supernatural aspect of it. The Angels do not need to sleep, and because they don’t, Satan doesn’t. As a fallen angel, Satan and his demons never sleep. We mere mortals, have lives, our attention divided in many directions. Satans army of demons have but one goal, destroy our lives, and cause as much problems as they can. With an enemy like that, how can we afford not to prepare our hearts and minds for the inevitable attacks that come? When we fail to build ourselves up, we face the dangers of the war going on all around us evermore. Complacency kills not only our own spirit, but can and does destroy our families, and other relationships. 

FIGHTING BACK

It’s always important to know how to study, so here are some basic tips needed to know for preparing your minds for battle. 

First: Picking the right bible. It’s important to know that not all bibles are the same. Some are a more faithful word for word translation, while others attempt to portray the thought and meaning behind the scripture. I for one, have gone through a process when it comes to scripture. I started off with two primary translations, the ESV or English Standard Version, the NKJV, which is the New King James Version, and now, while I sometimes still use the other two, the NASB95 is my go-to translation. It is generally thought that the NASB95 is the closest word for word bible we have. This of course does not include the newly printed Legacy bible. When you chose your bible, just because it’s ‘easier’ to read, doesn’t mean is the better bible. Words matter, and I always recommend having a tool to allow you the ability to see the original wording as part of your bible study. 

Second: Study bible, and study tools. I would recommend a study bible so you can read a short commentary verse by verse about what a studied individual has to say about a verse. This also comes with a caveat. Not all study bible commentaries are considered reputable. I would recommend someone like John MacArthur, RC. Sproul, JC Ryle, and such for commentaries. One of my favorite study bibles is the ESV Reformation Study Bible by RC. It’s massive, with a ton of extra information. 

Third: A daily devotional. While this doesn’t ever replace study, I do believe it gives us bits of God’s message. I personally have several devotionals; my favorite is the Hobbit Devotional. Not all devotionals are written by those who are reputable either. Be careful who you listen to on social media, YouTube, and in writing. Not all those who claim the name of Christ are of Christ. 

Lastly: Personal Study. This does not mean you just read scripture, but that you study the verse. Find the deeper connections, dig for gold verse by verse. Look up the original language to ensure the English words are truly the meaning we find in scripture. Cross reference verses. Learn how the bible fits together. Dig deep and train your mind to see God’s word inside your heart. We must bury scripture deep into our hearts, so it begins to sprout with deep roots, and the tree of God is evident in the fruit we produce. How do we handle and manage situations? Can Christ be seen in our actions? We must study to allow the tree to grow inside us. To fight back against the schemes of the Devil. We must learn and grow so me can properly live Christlike before the world, but most importantly, before our families. 

Hardships come to all who live in this world. This is an incontrovertible fact, one we must come to expect, and not shy or hide away from. Knowing these hardships will come, why then do we not prepare for them? Do we not board up windows and fill sandbags when storms like hurricanes come? Do we not seek shelter when the tornado sirens blare in the night? Do we not batten down the hatch when the winds billow? Why then do we not prepare for the fight we know is coming? We as Christians are lazy. We have a pseudointellectual understanding of the bible, but it’s barely even a surface level understanding because we take verses out of context, or cant decipher a scripture verse, verses a movie quote. Let me give you an example. How many wise men were there at the manger with Jesus when he was born? If you said three you were wrong. First, it’s likely there were many, many more than three. Second, they were not there the night our savior was born. Instead when we read scripture, we see he was likely closer to two years old when they found him. We now this because when we read scripture, we see it’s both separated, and the time gap can be seen when Harod doesn’t murder just the babies, but the infants as old as two years old. Because we often see in culture these misconceptions, we in essence believe these things, and it hurts the name of Christ. 

Scripture tells us we will have trials, we will have tribulations, we will face hardships, and heartbreaks, and if we don’t know how to manage life’s difficulties, it will destroy us. It’s interesting that if you take a child and that child goes through hardships, that warm, loving child will often change. We lose something as we get older, but while scripture tells us we need to mature, we are also called to have the wonderment, the faith of a child. We let life get the better of us, so much so, we hold on to unforgiveness, we become hard, we become jaded. I look back at myself, and often wonder what went wrong? Where did things change for me? How did I go from an optimistic, fun loving, positive kid, to what I am today? It’s almost as if life stole something from me, and I never got it back. 

The truth is, no one gets out of this world without scars. Our scars can define us. If we chose to, the scars can be a negative reminder, keeping us in our pain, and suffering. Or, the scars can be seen as a battle in which we emerged victorious. I had open heart surgery recently, and I have many scars now. I have constant pain and struggle from things that have happened after surgery. How should I go about handling it? Should I face my every day with a poor attitude, be angry at the world? Or, should I look to these challenges, and be grateful for the miracles I experienced which kept me alive? While our minds are preset to look at life in a negative way, we have the power to change the programming, and face life with a different set of eyes. We may not be able to change or have control over the events that happen to us, but we do have the ability to change how we act and respond to these events. What kind of person do you want to be? What kind of legacy do you want to leave behind? Recently I was asking some question about my deceased father. I’ve gotten a mixed bag of feedback. The things I heard in some ways made me very sad. In some ways, I now wonder if I was better off not knowing all these years. Was I protected by God by being separated my whole life? I don’t know. What I do know is this, we will make mistakes, and we will do stupid things, but it’s our jobs as Christians to do our best to mitigate those mistakes. It’s our job to try and look like Christ in everything we do. Every interaction we have, both good and bad, how do we respond? The more scripture is buried into your heart, we respond better. We can chose to live our lives in despair, or we can persevere, push through the pain, and suffering, and see the light of God the Father in our lives. Focus on the positive things God is doing. Focus on how God is blessing you, and taking away only that which makes you stronger. Take away what you need in the traumas you face, and leave the rest behind. Don’t live in your review mirror, but look forward instead. Glance behind once in a while, but only to see what you’ve overcome, what God has brought you through. But, then, focus on today, right in front of you, then look out to the horizon as you look forward to tomorrow. Never quit, never surrender, and always seek God’s wisdom, and truth, and be grace, and mercy, forgiveness, but most importantly, don’t forget to be love. This is how you persevere in life. This is how you excel in the trials of this world. You seek first the kingdom of God, and in all you do, do for the glory of the Lord. 

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The Burdens

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The Burdens

We all have our burdens. Some people will face burdens of the external kind, people, or things in their life. Some will face those from within, pain, or sickness. The challenge recently for me has been the internal. It’s been days now of pain in the 6-7 range. With only brief moments of relief, it’s easy to say, fatigue can set in. With fatigue comes the spiritual attacks. Whether it be thoughts brought on by the sin nature that dwells within, or the devil whispering in my ear, the struggle is real. 

I am reminded of Paul, who in an encouraging statement said he prayed three times to have a thorn in his side removed. God denied his request. Paul’s answer in 2 Corinthians 12:10 “Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ’s sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” God’s answer to Paul is “My grace is sufficient.” Do we have this mindset when we are going through something? Do we seek God first to remove our torment, and if he says no, do we settle in and take joy in those infirmities, persecutions, and hardships? 

Being in constant, chronic pain is not easy. It brings fatigue, irritability, frustration, and in many cases it can bring depression, and hopelessness. Despite the struggle, I find myself turning to God. While the sharks smell blood in the water, in my low points, I will not let the deep drag me down. 

There have been many great men who have endured years of hardships, so I may have the opportunity to do the same. Some comes in the way of persecution, but regardless, my Savior and King Jesus Christ was beaten, scourged, battered, a crown of thorns placed upon his head, and placed isn’t a strong enough word, crushed down upon his head, forcing the thorns to dig into his flesh, tearing it along the way, causing profuse bleeding into his face. My savior had flesh ripped down into the very sinews of his muscles. He was placed on a cross in which he had to raise himself up with a spike driven through his feet, and his torn open back scraping along the wood plank, just to breathe. He came to bare that burden for us. Not for all, but for the ones who accept his gift. What kind of character does it take to die for your enemy? What is our example? This, to lay down one’s life for someone who hates you, spit on you, just for the chance they may see their wicked ways changed, and follow you. Jesus knew that not everyone would follow him. In fact, he knew that few would choose to truly lay down the world, and pick up their own cross. 

The walk of a Christian is one of struggle, hardships, and battles. God gave us the command to be the church, and commands to the church on how to act, what to be. We as Christians are given the command to lay down our burdens at the foot of the cross. We are to lay them down at the feet of Jesus and let him be God and to let us trust in Him. While some burdens, like sickness may not go away, the pain may not go away, the renewing of strength may be given to us. Nights like today, I feel the need to feel his presence. I feel the need to cry out to the Lord to be with me tonight. I feel myself growing tired and in need of rest. The attacks of the devil start to swirl around me and in my own military mind, I request danger close call for fire. I cannot fight the fight against the demons circling round alone, but I know Jesus won’t let me fight alone. 

My hurt will never go away. My skeletal neck injuries will remain until I have reconstructive surgery. While I know my pain won’t be going anywhere, it’s not the pain I ask for healing for, but the renewal of my spirit. I don’t need the burden I’ve been given removed, only help to bare it. I have accepted my fate; I just need help getting up and fighting the good fight every day. I cannot do this without my Lord and Savior Jesus. My heart is heavy for the burden I create for my loved ones. Those who take care of me when I cannot get out of bed. Those who make a meal when I hurt too much to cook. To those who comfort me in my time of need. 

God has blessed me, and his will is perfect, and sovereign. All we can do is, no matter what we go through, is to tell the world Jesus. This dark world needs the light of Christ. The great rejection of Jesus is real today, and we need to stand firm on our faith. We worship not because we are healed, but in spite of not being healed, knowing Jesus is Lord. I know one day this broken shell will be remade. I know in one day I will be accepted into glory and this body will not hurt anymore. I know that day will be all the sweater, knowing I suffered for it. 

We may not be able to change our circumstances, but we can change our perspective. We may not be able to take away our pain and struggle, but we can embrace it, to build His kingdom. Let us look different when the world looks down upon us. Let us be so different it bewilders the unbeliever how we can have so much joy in the midst of so much pain. Let us praise our Jesus in the darkest of nights. And when the world hurts us, when the world spits on us, let us remember, 

“Father, give me grace to forgive them, for I feel like I’m the one loosing.” (Losing, By: Tenth Avenue North) 

No matter where you are in your walk, remember if you start to stray, remember, you’re one step away. Jesus is with you, waiting for you to accept him. His love has been with you, and you’ve never been alone. God’s grace and mercy show us, that no matter if you were a tax collector, or a murderer of the innocent, God’s grace is infinite. God’s mercy can transform hearts, and change even the most brutal of people. We are sinners, enemies of God and we’re saved by His grace. We are saved in Faith, and all we must do is repent of our sins, and let Jesus into our hearts, changing us, and becoming something new. Lay down those old rags, and pick up the cloth of a child of the King. Let Jesus break those old chains that bound you to your sin, and free you from that burden. Look to the empty tomb and know he is risen. The cross is empty, Jesus finished the work so we may live, so let us live for Him. 

Go in pace and continue to Love one Another. 

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Hardships Endure 

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Hardships Endure 

It’s no secret that my life has been one of hardships, heartache, and difficulties. Not saying I haven’t had good times, even great times, but as a friend once told me, ‘if it weren’t for bad luck, I wouldn’t have any luck at all.’ From an early age I have experienced hardships most people at my age couldn’t imagine, and wouldn’t have known what those hardships were called. As I was told, before I was three years old I knew the word Anesthesiologist. By the time I was three years old I had undergone 4 surgeries. By the time I was 16, I had 7 surgeries, and by the time I was 18 I had 9 surgeries. Needless to say, I was familiar with doctors and hospitals. 

By the time I was 19 I had moved several times. One of those times was a move by myself from Michigan across the country to Massachusetts. Each of the times, minus one, I moved by myself away from family. With every move I was left with heartache, and struggle. For most of my life I didn’t feel I had a home, and even now, I don’t have a place to call my own. The feeling of failure has been and is quite real for me. In recent months I have been given a grave diagnosis, and while I have been attempting to manage the emotional fallout, I find myself fatigued. How can I take care of myself, if I am broken and in constant pain. Chronic pain takes a toll on the human mind, and can often cause frustration, sadness, depression, and anger. On a deeper level, the combined aspects of pain, physical issues, living situation, it often leaves me feeling inadequate, worthless. I don’t care much for the idea of self-esteem, simply because we should know and understand our place in this world as broken, sinful, enemies of God. However, on the flip side of that coin, we are also loved and grafted into the Kingdom of God, through the grace and mercy of Jesus. Needless to say finding a balance is important. A balance I have not been doing so well at, as of late. 

When I go through hardships I try to think of a few characters from scripture. The first and most notable is Job. Job’s hardships are quite obvious and extensive. His losses and trials stand testament to struggles for all people. I then consider the trials Paul faced. As a loyal servant of Jesus, Paul faced beatings, stoning, jail, poverty, and ultimately murdered by beheading. Recently however, the person I have been considering most is Elijah. In his pain, he cried out to the Lord to take his life. In his sorrow he did not want to be left alive, as he also felt his surviving was that of failure. 

Soldiers who lose others, lose comrades in battle often feel what’s known as survivors’ guilt. It is said that those who survive often wish their places be switched with those who died. Elijah it seems may have been dealing with some of this guilt and challenges. I have felt this way in the past. When I lost friends in combat, I was there, and witnessed what happened. I attempted to save my friend, and sadly failed to do so. I had intuition of an impending attack, and sadly that did nothing to prevent it from happening. In recent times, I have wondered what my purpose is, and as I have recently been given a difficult prognosis regarding my physical health, I have been put into a position where I’m not sure how to manage the emotional fallout. This recent revelation of difficult times ahead has left me with little recourse, and no control over what happens next. 

In hard times I have grown from a scared 11-year-old, an angry 30-year-old, to a seasoned, faithful servant of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. In the past I would compartmentalize a trauma, and move on. This would leave me more broken than where I started and never truly dealt or handled the trauma. Today, I face these problems head on. I look to James who says, count it all joy when you fall into various trials. How can I look at where I am and be in Joy? I have often asked myself, if James were to have been diagnosed with cancer would he still have found joy in such diagnosis? The answer, is yes. James knew and understood who the Lord Jesus was, and in that understanding he knew that whatever we go through in this life, it is temporary. It isn’t why we are going through these things, but rather how we respond to them. With the world watching us in every situation we are in, how are we showing our faith to the people around us? I’m not saying cancer is easy, nor am I saying major life changing back surgeries are easy either, but what I am saying is that, people are looking to you because you may be a mentor to them. You may be someone’s inspiration, or even someone’s curiosity. Here’s an example: 

You go to work every day, and people at work know you’re a Christian. You have a smile on your face, and you talk about Jesus, but life is generally smooth for you. A bombshell hits, and you lose a child in a car accident. This tragedy leaves you devastated, and you become bitter with God, or worse, you walk away all together. Those whom you once shared your faith with, now see you walking away. How strong was your faith, that you would walk away, and what message does that send to those who may have been on the fence to follow Jesus or not? Someone is always watching you, whether it be a friend, family, coworker, or one of the kids from Church. Someone is always watching, and how we deal with trials and tribulations, is more important than the worship we give during times of still waters. It is easy to praise God when it’s smooth sailing, but when the going gets tough, that’s when a persons’ true nature is exposed. I’m not saying we don’t struggle during hardships, but ultimately, how strong is your faith? Are you like Peter on the water with Christ? Faithful for a few moments, until the waves crash around you, and you sink? What did Jesus say? “Oh ye of little faith.” Do we have little faith when times get tough? 

We must work on our faith and focus on our attitude and behaviors, and our emotions. I myself struggle with emotional positivity when things get hard. I struggle to stay away from the pity party I often throw for myself, albeit internally. I hide my feelings from many people, and perhaps share too little to others and sometimes too much to some. As I woke up this morning sore from head to toe after putting up the new tent, I find myself struggling to walk around the house. The pain I feel in my back is more than just sore, different from the sore in my legs and arms. While it’s a challenge to get around the house today, the Lord blessed me with the opportunity to work hard, and do something for my family. The replacement for the tent I have lived in for nearly three years arrived and was in need of being put up. A fresh, brand-new tent with no patches, or holes, no leaks, and no extra rope required. I could focus on the fact I am sore and hurting today, or I could focus on the gift from God, for a place to live. No one said following Jesus was easy, and as we see in scripture, hardships come to all who follow God. All of the prophets in scripture had challenges to overcome, David and Solomon had their own challenges, Daniel and Elijah, had their challenges. Peter, Paul, Matthew, and the others had their challenges, and even death. Do we face hardships like Steven does in the book of Acts? Steven in the face of death by stoning said this, Acts 7:60  “Then he knelt down and cried out with a loud voice, “Lord, do not charge them with this sin.” And when he had said this, he fell asleep. (Died)” Steven in the last moments of his life, didn’t curse his killers, but asked forgiveness from God to them. It isn’t easy, but we are called to have faith, not just in good times, but in the inevitable hard times. Some people think when you turn to Jesus and you follow him, those hard times will go away, and everything will be great, if you just have enough faith, and tithe. The truth is, this is a false gospel, this is a lie from Satan, that when the hard time does come you walk away from God because it wasn’t as you envisioned. Faith is not easy, and following Christ is hard. There’s a reason it says in scripture to pick up your cross and follow me (Jesus). There’s a reason Jesus tells you there will be trouble in the world, but have faith because He overcame the world. All these things are promised to the believer, and most importantly we know that the path to destruction is wide, while the path to the kingdom of God is narrow, few will enter into it. The path of a Christian is full of hardships and tears, but how great is the Kingdom of eternity, compared to the little while of hardships in this life? 

Today is one more day to do better than the last. Today is a day to rejoice because it is a day the Lord made. We are beautifully and wonderfully made for a purpose and we must turn to God, not to ask why, but in thanks for what we have been given. We have been given life, and an opportunity to Grow closer to Him, to turn to the Father in our time of need, and praise Him in the storm. We know Jesus has the power to calm the storm, but we can’t always expect He will. What we can expect is that Jesus is there with us. Jesus will lead us to the mountain top, or beside peaceful streams, and still waters. Jesus will hold our tears, and comfort us when we are in pain. He will rejoice with us when we rejoice. We do not travel this world alone, and since life is but a vapor compared to eternity with the Father, we should be thankful for the good times, and prepare for battle during the hard times. Face the trials with bravery and courage. Get up each day we are allowed to get up and be thankful for it. No matter where we are, thank God for the opportunity to live our lives worshiping Him and allowing others around us to see God in us. 

God knows what we are going through. God sees our heartache and our hurt. I implore you to bring it all to the table. I beg you, if you are sorrowful, and sad, and angry, bring your weight before the alter, bring it all before a loving and understanding God and put your baggage down. You are accepted before the alter as you are and when you leave everything there, when you lay it all down, and when you surrender to the Lord you leave a different person. The battle is not yours to win, but has already been won by Jesus, our Savior. The battle belongs to Jesus, and while we struggle with life, a place is promised where that hurt, and sorrow doesn’t exist. The burden we carry is not for us, for we are called to trust in the Lord. Psalm 55:22 “Cast your burden on the Lord, And He shall sustain you; He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.” Trust in the Lord and surrender all. Do not carry your burdens alone, for you have been given a choice to trust in God, or try to do it on your own. When you cast your burdens upon the Lord, allow the Holy Spirit to come into your heart, and heal you, change you from the person dead in their sins, but reborn as a believer of Christ. Come as you are, leave changed. 

The Battlefield

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The Battlefield

The soldier’s armor is silver, it shines, glimmers in the light, freshly polished the scuffs from prior battles are barely noticeable after time and repair. The soldier stands at the front line of the battlefield. The sun glistens off the armor of him and the other soldiers. The sun shines on their backs and ahead of them an army of the hoard. An endless sea of black and death, led by the deceiver himself. The tension is high, the fear is thick and the rattle of the shields can be heard echoing in the valley. The calm before the storm, the moments before the word is given for the silence, the peace before the violence and the carnage begins.

The white flag is raised, the red Celtic cross ripples in the wind. The breath from the soldier is heavy as he closes his eyes for a fleeting moment. The smooth inhale and the hold, before exhaling every bit of air he had left. His eyes open, “protect me my Lord” he pleads to God above and he braces himself for what he knows is coming. His heart is torn knowing the men to his left and right may fall. He knows the battle will claim those he cares for. He knows the battle may very well claim his own life. The appearance of time seems to slow, as he can see the flag dropping forward. He sees a butterfly on the grass in front of him, only for a moment he can see each flap of it’s wings, the wind as it pushes the grass ever so slightly.

The flag drops and the rush starts. He raises his sword, shield in hand, the drum that is his heart pounds as the seconds before the crashing wave hits with the force of a hundred elephants. His shield crashes into the demons. Bones crack, and the blackness all around covers the eyes like a haze, an endless sea of darkness and the light of the sun that once shone so brightly is now gone. The thunder rolls and the rain falls. The sounds of metal on metal, bones on bones, flood the air and nothing but screams and death now fill the air. A sword swings on the soldier and it deflects off his sword. With his shield he hits the demon in the chest and it falls to the grown. He sees it now, lighting the dark sky the flaming arrows begin to rain down. The soldier ducks covering himself with his shield. The arrows never pierce his shield, they only bounce off, he reads the inscription on the inside of his shield. Ephesians 6:16 “Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.” The soldier stands fast not moving to soon, waiting for the arrows of the Devil to stop for the time being. The Devil you see doesn’t care who gets hurt, doesn’t care about the collateral damage just so long as he’s able to hit one person. His demons do his bidding, no matter those who fall, even their own.

He’s knocked to the ground, kicked from behind; the spike of the spear pierces his armor on his side and punctures his flesh. He moves quickly from the attack and rolls from the following attacks. He swings his sword the blade etched in the steel Psalm 144:1 “Blessed be the Lord my strength which teacheth my hands to war, and my fingers to fight:” He prays to himself even in the midst’s of battle.” The Holy Spirit anoints me and protects me upon the day of battle, for the day of battle is at hand.” The battle continues, blow after blow defected with shield or sword. The soldier fights with every ounce of strength he has.

The battle turns and the demons start to get the upper hand. One by one soldiers across the field of battle fall. Brothers, fathers, sons, begin to be slain by the Devils minions. Another round of flaming arrows begins to fly in. The soldier hides under his shield, the arrows fall from the sky like rain. The field of battle is now dripping with water, blood, soaked in rivers that flow from the bodies on the ground. The soldier fights one enemy after the next. He continues the battle, slaying one demon after the next. The soldier is hit from behind, a blow that knocks him off his feet. He rolls to see the biggest of the demons he’s seen. The demon places the large foot over the soldier’s chest. Crushing under the weight, the soldier takes his dagger and stabs the demon in the calf. The demon stumbles back, and the soldier takes his sword and throws it. It strikes the demon in the middle of the chest sinking deep into the bone. The demon looks down at the sword before falling straight back.

Retrieving the sword the soldier takes a moment to look around the battlefield. Fighting continues, as the forces of evil are still holding the advantage. A black squall comes from the clouds and everything around its circumference explodes outward. The dust settles quickly, un-naturally, and there in the middle is the Dark Lord himself. Huge, the lord of darkness now stands toe to toe with the soldier. The soldier takes a few steps back to gain a little space. He looks around and he’s surrounded on all sides by darkness. The soldier rushed the prince of darkness and attacked. The soldier is knocked hard to the ground. One blow after the soldier is knocked to the ground, yet he continues to rise. The battle rages on.

The war seems lost, the fallen are many, the Devil continues to slaughter the men in droves. The soldier struggles now to stand. He’s bleeding, he’s battered, he’s bruised, and he struggles to breath. The strength is failing him. His helmet is cracked, his knuckles are black and blue, and he struggles to stand. How the blows of battle have taken their toll. The end seems neigh. When the soldier’s strength is about to fail he looks to the sky and remembers the words. Psalm 23:4 “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.” He takes the sword raising to the sky, “Lord give me power, light up the darkness.” From the sky the darkness parted and the light from the sky shined down upon the sword, the strength of the Holy Spirit filled him and he could feel the power flow through him. He smashed the tip of the sword deep into the ground and the ground split. A light brighter then anything he’d ever seen exploded from the sword and the demon army faded away like a shadow does in the light.

The only demon to stand is the Devil himself, to stand-alone. With renewed strength the soldier walks to stand up to the Devil. The Soldier stands with what little army there was left behind him. Like David before him standing before Goliath, he stands tall. James 4:7 “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” Standing firm against the Devil and on the wings of the angels he leapt into the sky, sword raised, shield in hand he struck down the form of the Devil. He thrust the sword of Truth into the neck of the Devil, and the form crumbled to the ground.

Emerging victorious the ash settles and he faces the remaining soldiers on the field. The Devils army did extensive damage. The souls lost have never been in vein. Every day souls are lost to one thing or another. Time, disease, accidents, war, or even murder happen every day and children of the King go home. We all have to face the truth, and the truth is the Devil tries to come for us. He tries to tempt us away from what’s right, he tries to cause us to doubt, loose faith, to question everything to include our own existence.

The battlefield we all live in is life. We wake up every day and we go out into the world and we fight our battles. Every day we take hits, we fight the fight. Some days are better then others, some years are great, some are a struggle and some are like living in a fog. We can be beaten down, and some days we bleed. When the battle is no longer what we see on TV how do we get ready for the battle? How do we face the enemy when we meet on the field of battle? In as many months and years we’ve seen pure evil as our nations borders. The battles being waged are no longer on TV over the big pond, but right in our back yard. Incidence like Sandy Hook, Boston, Orlando, Vegas, and now most recently Sutherland Springs, have shows us we are no longer safe from evil. How many countless lives are lost to violence to evil? We can’t ever prepare for every battle we may face, but if we know the Lord and Savior, if we allow God into our hearts and submit ourselves to the King, then it doesn’t matter if we go out and loose the battle (our lives) because we know where we are going. Do not fear death, because death is the beginning of life. While we miss our loved ones who’ve passed we should also rejoice that they are in perfection. Our life is worth every minute because our lives are numbered by the days we’re in it.

It’s not easy to get back up when life has crushed your spirits. It’s not easy to face down the giant when you’re scared. It’s not easy to run into the fray when all hope seems lost. We may not always have the scripture in front of us right when we need it, but we can keep the words at our fingertips. We have Godly counsel to turn to, and if you’re like me, I wear a ring with the Armor of God passage. I wear an arrow necklace to remind myself who I am, I am Al-Sahm, and I know that I hold the bow and arrows for God. I am a soldier not just for my country, but more importantly for God. Remember to keep your armor and be ready when the battle comes to your back yard. There may come a day when God calls upon you to be a soldier. No matter what the battle may bring know the end for you will always be Heaven so long as you’re a soldier for the King. We can choose what side we’re on, and as for me, I choose the God that’s given me everything I have.

 

 

 

Blind Spot

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Blind Spot

For the last year I have had a blind spot when it comes to one facet of my life. I have apparently duplicated my suffering by not learning a lesson years ago. My hope has always been to see the best in people, even when the best in them has not been shown. I have put aside pain, suffering, wicked behavior, I have allowed lies to pass through my ears and still I have given the benefit of the doubt.

Over the majority of my life I have often allowed people more then one chance at my heart. In fact to be brutally honest with myself, I’ve allowed a few people more then several chances. I’ve been hurt more then my share by people I’ve continued to allow being in my life. While I would have been considered to be the one at fault for allowing someone who had a history of ‘flip flopping’ their position, yes, when it comes to love, I would say I am stubbornly blind.

While 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 speaks about what love truly is, it’s also important to know that at some point while we may love our neighbor, while we may love someone, when that person does nothing but hurt you over and over again, you must learn, like I am still trying to learn, to let them go. We must learn how to not force our will upon others, we must learn to be patient and allow God’s will to come to fruition. I don’t know what the path I’m on is meant to accomplish, but having faith in the creator of the plan, I must realize I’m just a character in someone else’s book. Like it or not I am not in control of the vast majority of what goes on within my life. All I can do is learn to react to each changing moment and try must best to be a Godly man.

While my hope for others and the ones I care about may not be the smartest thing I’ve done, I often see the worst in the world, but see the best in my love, and ignore the bad they do. I can no longer sit idly by and allow myself to be put into harms way over and over again. I have failed myself and the heartbreak I have led myself to over and over again must stop. Divorce is hard on anyone. Perhaps that this is my second divorce, and the second affair I’ve weathered, the family I lost, and the hopes I had to rebuilding it are now utterly gone. For every winter there becomes a spring, and with that spring fresh life. Sometimes in our lives we have to take the blinders off and see the world and ‘someone’ for who and what it really is. We must learn to see the world beyond our narrow view. We must learn to see people for who they are and not who we want them to be.

“You either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.” (Dark Knight Return) While I firmly believe the idea that this may be the case, it certainly has been in my life. The hero’s in my life have become the villains in my story. (Excluding Jesus) Never forget the true hero in our life died upon the cross to save us all from a horrible forever death. While in our life we may meet police officers, firefighters, or soldiers, all of which could be considered heroes, eventually all manner of men will fail you. Sometimes in life the Devil wins and as any true strategist knows, some battles once lost cannot be salvaged. If a battle cannot be won sometimes a retreat and regroup must be made in order to win the war. Never forget the bondage of sin may have been broken, but the war is far from over. Remember to fight the good fight and win what we can. As for me, I know that no matter how dark and cold the winter is, there’s always a way to get colder, and darker. I’m not certain if my winter is over, or if the deepest winter is still coming, but either way, God will provide the path and the direction, and any and all of us can follow, when the blinders come off.

 

Do you want to win the battle or do you want to win the war?

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Do you want to win the battle or do you want to win the war?

“Better to retire and save your aircraft than push a bad position.” Viper We get into fights and arguments all the time, for all kinds of different reasons. Most of it is a different point of view based on ones past and not knowing how to truly listen and understand the other person. We as a society have lost the simple ability to listen with any kind of empathy, or even care to the other person’s point of view. Our differences are important, but understanding and respecting those differences is equally as important.

When we talk about marriage and long term relationships, or any relationship for that matter it’s important to realize conflict will come up in every relationship. When conflict comes up the key is not to avoid it, but to learn how to successfully iterate your point of view, accept the other persons, and find a common ground solution. I personally have not been very good at this in the past. I’m not usually the type to go into hulk mode, yell and scream, hulk smash sort of thing, but I would instead use a logical approach, use data and facts to back up my argument. Now most would say that’s a great way to go at it, however, while sometimes it’s a good way, others it can be a great determent. When the argument has an emotional side and the other person has an emotional response to the argument, not asking or understanding that POV can be hurtful to the other person. If you are like me, and in the past I would say well these are the facts, and because of that, everything else is wrong, that can make the other person feel rejected because you didn’t take the time to listen or understand the how or the why they feel that way.

If we take just a little bit of time to question if the argument or disagreement we’re in is important or now we can avoid a lot of problems just by throwing in the towel sooner. One of my major faults was to approach the argument by way of evidence and if it were rejected I’d try to give the evidence a different spin and present again. Sadly, repeating an argument doesn’t usually get you anymore, so learn from me, and don’t do that. Maybe once or twice, but even that second try of repeating may not be a good idea. A Christians we are taught in James 1:19 “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:” This isn’t a suggestion, this is what we are told to do. When we listen, and listen with empathy we can learn a great deal about the other side of the table.

When we are at the table we should learn one particularly useful trait and with the empathetic listening we should also use the art of negotiations. If the debate is getting out of hand we should learn how to back up, and open the table to negotiations for a compromise. Trust me guys and gals, it’s better to both loose something in the negotiations rather then loose each other. If we for just one second try to look through God’s eyes and use God’s heart we may just learn it’s better to just let go, because whatever you’re arguing about may not be important in a few days, or even a few hours. Some big decisions should be handled with lots of prayer and open lines of communication, but always learn to compromise and negotiate. Always learn why the other person feels the way they do.

If you want a long, strong, healthy relationship it’s best to learn the skills of how to effectively present your side of any discussion and learn how to ask for the other. Get all the facts. When you’re angry or frustrated check the facts, see if your emotions match the level situation. We can often be more frustrated then we should be, we can be more angry than we should be, and it’s important to be able to catch when those things happen.

Remember when you love someone whatever the argument is, it’s probably not worth the fight. Once we get to fighting we’ve lost track of the point of love. Love your neighbors as yourself which means fighting with them is hurting you too. As Viper said in top Gun it’s better to retire then get yourself into a bad situation.

The Battle Rages On

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The Battle Rages On

When you feel all alone and then when you feel you can’t breath at all, how do we learn to survive? We survive because we must. The alternative isn’t very flattering. When we try to find others around us to depend on, sometimes we look in all the wrong places, and sometimes we just don’t have what we need, or at least that’s what we think sometimes. Often we wish we had more but really, is it the best thing for us, is it what God has in store?

The thing about surprises is, they are meant to shock us. When Christmas comes around we love to open our gifts and be surprised at what we get. When our surprises in life are good we couldn’t be happier. So why do we compete? When we join a sports team of some kind, what’s the fun in winning without challenge? How do we ever know our true potential unless we are tested.

As Captain Pike said to Kirk, “Do you like being the only genius-level re-offender in the mid-west? So your Dad dies, you can settle for a less than ordinary life. But you feel like you were born for something better. Something special.” What will force you to face your true potential? The only way it seems is to challenge our selves and push us beyond our comfort zones and rise to the occasion. When God gives us our challenges, it’s so we can rise above. When the Devil gives us our knocks, we can kick the Devil’s proverbial rear end, and please God as we overcome the Devils temptations. Our hardships are nothing more but training for the mission, temptations away from God, or mankind’s’ free will. James 1:13-18 “13 When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death. 16 Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. 17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. 18 He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.”

Living is not for the weak, and to live is to truly show strength. We cannot live our lives down and depressed. We cannot continue just floating in the water waiting for the sharks to devour us. If we want to live we can’t just flounder around, we must actually work for it. Life is nothing without joy, life is nothing without having fun. So why don’t we work on that more?

 

The battles we face can break us, or make us thrive. “Sooner or later, we all go through a crucible” Sabastian Blood He goes on to say “Most believe there are two types of people who go into a crucible. The ones who become stronger from the experience and survive it, and the ones who die. But there’s a third type. The ones who learn to love the fire and choose to stay in their crucible because it’s easier to embrace the pain when it’s all you know anymore.” How will you survive yours? How will your crucibles shape who you are?