I Was A Sheep Dog Once

I was 18 when I got the letter from the Department of Defense, denied. I had an emergency, second umbilical hernia surgery. I was completely devastated. By the grace of God one year later I was walking through a grocery store when I ran across a recruiter. I told him my story, and he told me to try again in so many months. Let the surgery heal, and once it did for a year, then, try again. I didn’t have a backup plan. My backup plan to go to college fell apart for various reasons. It wasn’t that I wasn’t smart enough for college, it was the situation I was in. Later in my life I would go, and I would graduate with a 6.65 GPA. Not too shabby. I would first go to the Air Force recruiter, but I didn’t love the idea of desk job, and didn’t really love the idea of being security forces (Military Police). When I got back from MEPS, I got back with no recruiter waiting for me to discuss further options. I was angry. I immediately went into the Army Recruiters office, and he gave me a pamphlet. By the time I was home a mere 15 minute drive, I circled several options. When I got home. I began using the internet to narrow down my selection till I had one clear choice, Calvary Scout. When I went back to MEPS this time under the Army Flag, there was only one spot for scout training, if I wanted to leave in 4 months, I would have to write an essay, and thankfully I was chosen. I did pretty well in Basic, but I wasn’t top of my class, but I finished with honor anyway. I finished the 25Kilo Ruck March crossing the finish line, after a week in the field, with little food (I was a vegetarian), and no sleep, we embarked on the finial ruck of training. When I crossed the finish line, I knew I would get my cross sabers. 

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Not everyone finished the ruck, but the smallest guy in the platoon did. I would train and deploy. I would go to Korea first where I learned how to be a warfighter. What is a warfighter you may ask, “A warfighter is a military service member—soldier, sailor, airman, or marine—directly engaged in or trained for combat and operations, emphasizing a cohesive, agile approach to winning battles” My platoon was directly responsible for several missions at the same time. We would do vehicle patrols, observation posts (OP’s for short), We’d do EOD (Explosive Ordinance Disposal) escorts. We would do raids, we would do what we called snatch and grabs, where we would seek in, or bust in and arrest high value targets. We’d often have to do a breach to enter into the dwelling quickly. We’d move into sniper/ambush missions. Sometimes our days were filled with mission after mission. We were often away from the base, away from help, and we’d do our missions with 4-5 people. We had a heavy work load, and we often found ourselves going from one mission to another. I was trained as a weapon. The idea of a soldier being a weapon is not new. Everything I learned in Iraq, and in the Army taught me how to survive. Since then, the time I worked in security, the time I worked in a detention facility, all taught me valuable lessons about what it means to be a protector. 

During my time in college, I studied the human mind, the mindset of a criminal, and in many cases the mindset of a terrorist. I studied homeland security, emergency management, terrorism, and a whole lot of psychology. Today I still use what I have learned on a much smaller scale. I protect my home, and anyone that may be in my orbit while I’m out of the house. For a long time, I made do with what I had. Now my situation has changed a bit, but I am still protecting my home and those around me. No matter the situation it’s important to focus mostly on the intent. Some people have more of a protector mentality then others. When I was a kid, I did my best to stand up to bullies, even though I was tremendously bullied. Later in life I swore I’d stand up for the little guy. I swore I’d stand up to fight bullies any chance I’d get. 

One day at church I was approached by a member of the safety team at my church, to see if I’d be interested in serving on that ministry. I was given my assignment, and when we’d next meet, and so it began, I was a new member of the safety team at church. Some who still live under a rock think a security team is not necessary. I could not disagree more. Some who disagree say it’s not the Christian way. In scripture it talks about the Temple Guards. Keepers of the peace and protection, inside the temple. Scripture tells us to the best of our ability live in peace with all man. It never says to roll over and let people hurt you. IF the government deems your death to be necessary, because you serve a mighty God, to trust in the Lord, even if it means dying for your faith. Old Testament Law says Exodus 22:2-3 2 “If the thief is caught while breaking in and is struck so that he dies, there will be no bloodguiltiness on his account. 3 But if the sun has risen on him, there will be bloodguiltiness on his account. He shall surely make restitution; if he owns nothing, then he shall be sold for his theft.” While the rules at the time change for daylight, we have a different set of laws which are still acceptable. We call it the ‘Castle Doctrine’. The home is your castle, and you are given legal right to assume someone breaking in beyond the threshold of the door or window is there to do you harm. Scripture tells us to follow the law of the land. We have a responsibility to defend our homes from attackers. In the middle east still to this day, specifically Iraq, every household has the right to defend itself, so they all have a rifle with two magazines. 

We all have responsibilities and while our first priority is to Christ, and living in peace, we must understand that sometimes that peace is taken from us by others. We don’t always have a say when we need to act in the interest in protecting ourselves or our loved ones. I find myself longing for the days when I felt like I was making a different in this life. I have always felt the need, the desire to protect others around me. I was shocked when I watched the movie American Sniper to hear such an amazing quote that summed up how I had felt my whole life. By the time American Sniper came out I had already been discharged from the Army. I did not know it, but Kyle had served in Ramadi the same time, I was there. 

It is said his father said this quote: 

“There are three types of people in this world: sheep, wolves, and sheepdogs. Some people prefer to believe that evil doesn’t exist in the world, and if it ever darkened their doorstep, they wouldn’t know how to protect themselves. Those are the sheep.

Wayne Kyle: Then you’ve got predators who use violence to prey on the weak. They’re the wolves.

Wayne Kyle: And then there are those blessed with the gift of aggression, an overpowering need to protect the flock. These men are the rare breed who live to confront the wolf. They are the sheepdog.” 

I was meek growing up. I often took the beatings that came my way from bullies. I guess, in some ways I displayed similar characteristics as Tommy from Kenny Rogers song Coward of The County. When push came to shove, Tommy did what he needed too, and in one day proved the county wrong. While in Iraq, I too did what needed to be done. Today, I find myself facing the truth of who I am. I cannot stay or remain silent of the evil I see in today’s world. I see the murder of children. I see the mutilation of children. I see the eroding of God given rights to people. I see the rise of corruption and the mass migration away from the Word of God. Evil rises all around us, and all we can do now, is prepare for the worst, and pray it never happens. Scripture shows us how important it is to plan for the future. In Joshua’s story, famine came to all the land, and he knew he needed to prepare for it, or everyone would parish. In my own life, on a much smaller scale, I see the need to prepare. Maybe it’s the emergency management mindset I have, or the experience in the Army planning for every contingency possible, but I always did my best to prepare. In recent months I have found how important it is that if I am going to be the sheep dog of old, I need to prepare my body for the fight. I cannot overstate how hard that is for me. My mind is willing but my body It seems didn’t get the memo. I struggle these days with things I shouldn’t. My body has failed in so many ways. It’s hard for me to keep pushing forward, when my body fails every week, it seems. When I wake up, I have to force myself to get out of bed even though I hurt. I have to push myself to go to Cardiac Rehab even though I didn’t sleep the night before. I have to convince myself to do my workouts, push my body, even though I hurt and ache every day. I know that this life is a fleeting one, one full of pain, and suffering, but much like Paul, sometimes the thorn in our sides is not removed by God. I have grown to put my faith in God, but I will admit sometimes it’s hard. My mind is willing, but my flesh is weak. My pain is fluid, it changes regularly, but it reminds me of my hardships, and just how sweet Heaven will be. What is this pain we suffer for a little compared to an eternity in the presence of God in Heaven. 

Even with my problems, I do my best to remain as positive as possible. My focus is always on the protection of those around me. With the current uptick in terrorist related attacks, and the threats against conservative Christian men, I find myself on constant high alert. The danger is real, and so is my response. I know what I need to do to stay safe, and because of that I have to wrestle with two truths. Truth one, is I am a Christian Soldier for Christ, fighting in an invisible war for people’s souls. Truth two, I am fighting as the spiritual leader of my household, which also makes me the soul protector in the non-invisible world as well. I must be both at the same time. I must be willing to do what is necessary to protect myself, my family, and those who are weak from harm. We see SheepDogs in a few different places. One, and mostly the military. Special Operators are often referred to as sheepdogs. Police, Firefighters, and some citizens would fall into the category of a sheepdog also. 

John 10:11-12 11 “I am the good shepherd; the good shepherd lays down His life for the sheep. 12 He who is a hired hand, and not a shepherd, who is not the owner of the sheep, sees the wolf coming, and leaves the sheep and flees, and the wolf snatches them and scatters them.”

Jesus calls himself the good shepherd who lays down his life to protect us. It takes great amounts of courage to stand up to wolves. When I was child and I was bullied, I didn’t have anyone stand up for me. But if we are to be Christ like in our lives, that means we too must be willing to lay down our lives doing what’s right. 

Matthew 10:16  “16 “Behold, I send you out as sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves.”

It’s important to be vigilant while out in public. People have always been dangerous, but this goes as an ebb and flow in time. Look at how dangerous it was back in the days of Jesus. Today, we see ourselves having to deal with more criminals as judges are soft on crime. Those of us who can protect, need to protect. Jesus is telling his disciples they are going into harms way. He tells them how to respond in the current situation they would find themselves. 

As important as it is to be a physical sheepdog, we must also be spiritual sheepdogs. 

Acts 20:28-29 28 Be on guard for yourselves and for all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the church of God which He purchased with His own blood. 29 I know that after my departure savage wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock; 

We have a responsibility to the truth, protecting the truth, and also protecting the sheep within the flock. One individual from scripture I have often gravitated towards is the story of Gideon. A man who was humble, perhaps even too humble, said he was the weakest of all his brothers. Even though he called himself the meekest of all his kin, he was chosen by God to lead an army. Gideon before war had 32000 men. Prior to the battle, he gave his men one last chance to leave. Any man who knelt down to drink would be sent home. He was left with 10000 men, then before the battle had only 300 men. There were few sheepdogs willing to stand up and fight. Even though he had a few 300 men they won the battle. I grew up a weak sheep, and when I graduated basic training, I vowed never to let someone bully me or harm the people I care about. A true sheepdog doesn’t seek out danger. We aren’t vigilantes. True sheepdogs want peace, we want peace so bad because we have seen the terrors of war. Because we have seen war, we value peace more than those who have only lived in peace. Sheepdogs want to keep and preserve the peace. 

In recent years church security has become more main stream. At my old church I was a part of the safety team. The mission is protecting the flock. If there was ever an incident, handle it without the rest of the congregation being aware of it, letting service continue uninterrupted. We saw recently when a Jewish Synagogue was attacked by an armed gunman, and was met by Synagogue armed security. “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.” (Edmund Burke). This quote suggests that apathy, silence, and inaction, permit evil to flourish. This is exactly what happened during WWII. The world stood by as the Nazi’s took over Germany, and when the countries surrounded by Germany began to fall one by one, the U.S. did very little, till the attack came to our doorstep. We allowed Germany to gain ground, and we in our apathy, allowed evil to flourish. Guns, knives, bow’s, etc. are all tools. We as a society (a worldly one) have begun having ridiculously crazy conversations about objects. In England, a famous English actor said we don’t need knives with points because kitchen knives are used in more attacks than any other bladed objects. Yet another ban on items rather than dealing with the true nature of the problem, people. In Australia, the land of dangerous things, they’ve banned machetes. Personally, with swords now being banned around the world, tools of the farm, or just survival, the change of what a man is, is imminent. I once saw a quote, “Hard times create strong men, strong men create good times, good times create weak men, and weak men create hard times” (Apparently quoted G. Michael Hopf) It takes a lot effort to create a society that prospers. Our very nation is the pinnacle of that idea. It took a lot of struggles, and hard work to build this country from nothing. From that nothing, a country began being built. In 1776 strong men got together to free a nation from the control of a king. To be free, and have the freedom that God has given to all men. Over the last 250 years this nation has endured good times and hard times. The situation now however, across the world is one of a steady decline. Since WWII while there’s been conflict somewhere around the world at all times, we’ve not had a great war. After Vietnam came Iraq and after 20 years of fighting this country has never seen war here at home. People here have forgotten history. Politicians here have begun to try and disarm the American people, a failsafe to ensure we have our freedoms protected. No armed forces have stepped foot in America, and one main reason is our freedom to bear arms. While this does not make someone strong, nor does it make someone a sheepdog, it is understood that our protections have followed the quote to its most logical conclusion. Our good times have indeed created hard times. The push, the desire to feminize men; the attack on masculinity has neutered, and softened their hands of men. Men once bore the sword for righteousness. Today we often do not think about government, police, or military carrying out the will of God against evil, but surely I say to you, there is Biblical precedent to this. (Speaking to those who do iniquities) 

Romans 13:4b But if you do what is evil, be afraid; for it does not bear the sword of nothing; for it is a minister of God, and avenger who brings wrath upon the one who practices evil.” 

This is referring to governments need to protect the innocent, to destroy evil where it stands. We as a society must remember 

“What must not be lost sight of is that, unpleasant as is the task of the jailor and the use of the whip, the cell, the noose, the guillotine, these things stand behind the stability of a civilized society, and they stand there necessarily, for God has declared it so, in harmony with reality, rather than with apostate sociological opinion.” (Robert Culver) 

Men willing to stand up and fight must remember there is no greater honor than to lay down one’s life for a friend. We as men must stand in courage to do what it necessary, to continue to fight the good fight, and never lose sight of doing good in the sight of God. We must continue our journey to fight the good fight as good Christian soldiers. We must continue to stand up to evil, and those who would do evil. Perhaps an unpopular take, but we must remember to do what’s right even if that takes us to far distant lands. In the words of Uncle Ben “With great power, comes great responsibility.” I am not saying we should go to war at the drop of a dime, nor should we. I’m also not saying that we should get involved in every conflict anywhere. But sometimes one must pick up the sword to destroy an evil bent on bringing that evil to the rest of the world. Iran is one such evil. Some may not like how our current president got to where we are, some may have disagreements with some of the details, and that’s fine. but the removal of dictators who’ve murdered their own people, murdered others around the world, sponsor terrorism, and those who support terrorism here at home, should be dealt with by means that are reasonable. Are we willing to stand up to do what is right, or as Dumbledore once said, “Dark and difficult times lie ahead. Soon we must all face the choice between what is right, and what is easy.” (Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire) 

For a long time, I felt like I lost something. After I got out of the military I struggled with purpose. I wasn’t following Christ as I should since I wasn’t actively serving my Lord. Sure, I believed, but that couldn’t have been seen in my actions. I went on sinning, thinking I was covered, and my fire insurance was set. I made poor decisions, even though I was doing the best to be a good friend, good husband, and in my own eyes, a good Christian. The problem was, I wasn’t doing anything to lead my home spiritually. I wasn’t setting the Christ like example before my family. I lost my way. Once upon a time I believed that the sheepdog in me was dead. I believed that I couldn’t protect my family because of past mistakes. I believed that because of my physical limitations from heart surgery and other issues I was worthless. I felt worthless, and my body screamed it. In recent months I have moved into a new phase within my life, and because of the grace, mercy, and faithfulness of God, much of what I lost in 2016 has been restored. If you remain faithful to the Lord even in the most difficult times you will receive restoration. Does this mean you’ll get everything back, the house, shiny new car, etc.? No, but one way or another you will receive restoration, either in life, or eternal life. In the last few months, I have been restored in some very specific ways, and that thing has allowed me to feel safe, comfortable, prepared, and strong. I finally feel as if a big part of who I was has been restored, and I am so thankful to God to allow me to experience His grace through restoration. Yes, I was a sheepdog once, but today, I can say, even despite my physical limitations, I am a sheepdog again. I am a Christian soldier, ready to deploy, ready to continue the fight, ready to share the Good News which is what the Gospel means. Christ is King, our commander in chief. We have the Holy Spirit with us, guiding us, showing us the path, and we have the host (a military term meaning troops, or army) of angels on our side. IF God is for us, who can be against us? Satan has lost the war, and despite that he tries to win battles, but we have the truth on our side. We have the safety and security knowing that the sheepdog that looks after us is the Good Shepherd. He not only defends us Himself, but He uses His mighty host of angels to do His will. We are soldiers, we are sheepdogs, and sheepdogs never die, they just get called home. Fight the good fight Brothers and Sisters, fight on. 

God Bless, 

Live Long And Prosper

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