Wandering – The Arrow Preacher

Find your Peloton

In life one of the hardest things we may ever do is find where we belong. My whole life has been one train wreck after another in my search for my place. As tough as it can be to admit, there are some personality types that are more difficult then others to find that place. Romans 14:8 “If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.”

The journey starts with prayers and focusing on your relationship with God. When we turn our focus to God we will eventually find our path. When we find our path from God the rest will eventually find a way. I have spent a lifetime trying to figure out my place, and some days I still feeling like I’m trapped under water unable to breathe. I’ve spent so much time wishing to be loved by someone in return. I’ve spent years searching for friends that would accept me for who I am. I’ve wanted to feel like I’ve belonged, to find a peloton where I belonged. In cycling I have learned the term peloton means a group of cyclers. While I still haven’t found where I belong in this life, I do know where I belong is with God.

For years I begged to give up something for God to put me where I belonged. I may have found my path by listening to the guidance from God, but I still haven’t found the love I’ve been seeking my whole life. Giving up isn’t something I’m accustomed to, but I will admit, after all this time I find myself beaten down and discouraged. Loving someone with all my heart and being forced to watch them leave without any true reason why is crushing. I haven’t recovered and even after all this time, I still wonder what’s next. I have prayed for my time to come and wondered if I’d find what I seek before the end. I have wondered if I would ever leave something to be missed when I’m gone. I pray and have hope that one day I will find my place. I have prayed to God that I would go the distance no matter how far I’d have to go. I’ve prayed to God to shape me and give me the tests so I could pass.

I’ve have given my blood, sweat and tears trying to get where I belong. I have felt like I’ve been stuck in a dream world unable to wake up from my nightmare. I have wandered in the dark for many years, and despite trying to wake up from my sleep, I still feel trapped. The darkness covers my world in sadness and despair with only small glimmers of hope sprinkled around me. As I try to grab on to a sparkle it’s snuffed out like grabbing onto a snowflake. While with enough snow the sun glistens brightest the day after a fresh snowfall, it does however take a good amount of snow. Before I have seen the sunrise on many snow days, the dirt and grime floods the snow and melts to slush quickly.

It takes time to find our place in this world, and a lot of pieces have to be moved before it’s our time to shine. Much like a marathon it takes time to move, position, and wait for the right moments to move to the front. When life is a marathon we must be patient and precise as we move around the bored. The future is always a question, but in the darkness we can find the light. The days that come are always a gift from God. God will always take care of us, and no matter the darkness covering our lives, God’s light will always make the darkness flee. The Devil wants you to feel alone, and he wants you to feel like you don’t have anyone in your life. While we may not have someone to fill our heart, there will be people we can turn to. Don’t let the silence keep you from joining a peloton. Don’t let the ride scare you. You need to get up and get out there, and you may accidently find what you seek if you just take a chance.

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To find where I belong!

Wandering aimlessly through the voidless desert of the hustle and bustle but to you it’s full of emptiness. Where do I belong, something’s wrong with the world, or is something wrong with me? God doesn’t make mistakes so this has to be right. Me being here is by a greater design that I don’t have clearance to see the whole plan. Fear engulfed emotions run wild. Dreaming of a place where I would find a warm welcome, a place to call home. Where can I plant my flag and finally find peace and rest in life. The constant barrage of cannon fire from the Deceiver has left me cowering for cover for too long.

A day will come when I’ll be on my way. I’ll be strong and this suffering will be a faded memory, and a scar to remind me of what I’m capable of. With God I can overcome anything. The first step is looking deep inside yourself. Start any new journey with the self-check. Be the man, the woman Jesus wants you to be.

Sometimes where you are or where you thought you were supposed to be was only temporary. The way the world can change in less then a heartbeat is powerful and scary at the same time. What does it mean to have faith? To trust in something beyond our control. To trust in the plan even when we can’t see it. To step out of your comfort zone and onto the stormy waters no mater the lies being whispered to you. The voice of God, Jesus will never leave you alone in the dark. For the Glory, the journey begins.

The walking sticks to help your trek made easier, the pack you carry to prepare for life’s challenges is no different the filling that canteen with the Holy Spirit. We may not be where we belong but that doesn’t mean we aren’t headed there. As long as you keep fighting and never give up, the lessons learned along the way will be forever useful. On the dangerous journey of life pass on the struggles, pass on the hardships, be a leader and a roll model for others struggling on their road. Be a guiding light, let people see Christ in you. There may be pain but there is grace also. The darkest sky can be darker. The waters could be higher. The tests could be harder. When we quiet ourselves and take a moment to educate ourselves on what’s going on in our world we can see worse everyday. We can always look out our cloudy window and see the more disenfranchised, the homeless, the countries with less then the least have here. Those who suffer from illness and poverty and those who have tragedy and more importantly those who parish not knowing the Lord.

This may not be where I belong but I know that God is in control. I know that God is on my side. I may not belong but my battle isn’t over. I will find my way if I am calm and listen. I will not be alone and I will find a love that will love God and me. I have faith in the Lord that I will not be forsaken. I will not be forgotten in the billions on this planet.

There is none like you oh Lord. You’ve created all, you’ve saved us all. We are so imperfect and yet so loved. We turn our backs, we don’t believe, we curse you, and still we have your grace. You oh God believe in me even when I don’t believe in myself. You see my importance, my worth even when others don’t. My God to you goes all the glory. I stumbled along the way but you kissed my boo boos and made it okay. You brushed me off and helped me up. Even without an earthly Father I had you, the greatest of all the Fathers anyone can hope for.

I am weak, I am a sinner and even when punished for my sins for my wrong doing I am forgiven and Loved endlessly. God’s on the move in every way, in every life even if they don’t see it. Be not afraid of what we don’t know because Gods not dead and we will live. The perfect lamb sacrificed for all of us so we may live without fear, and live to the glory of the one true King. We are free and we have a choice how to use that freedom. I have been wounded, hated, beaten and betrayed but I know the love that matters.

No I may not be home, I may be moving forward to a future unseen, a blind destiny, but I will take the leap of faith and I know God will catch me.

Hallelujah my God saves me

Hallelujah my God looks after me

Hallelujah my God never forsakes me

Hallelujah my God loves me

Hallelujah my God protects me

Hallelujah my God forgives me

Hallelujah my God died for me so I may live!

Tag: Wandering

Find your Peloton

To Find Where I Belong!