Tag: The Truth

Veterans Day Nov 11th

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Veterans Day Nov 11th

So many years ago, a young boy looked to the future and saw the stars and stripes. A young boys dream to wear the flag, and fight for this nation would be realized at the age of 19. Basic training was a challenge and tested the emotions and pushed the physical ability to the max. Nothing ever goes how we plan, but as far as experiences in service goes, mine could have been much worse. I started my service at Fort Knox Kentucky, and after 21 weeks I took the long flight to Korea. I was stationed at the small camp of Camp Hovey. I chose Korea as my duty station of choice to try and get some good training before deploying to Iraq. I knew I was going to go, but I knew Korea was a hardship duty tour so they didn’t deploy to a combat theater.

Three months into the tour of duty the word got out that for the first time in 50 plus years the units from Korea would again deploy. In our case the entire unit wasn’t just deploying, but was being moved out of Korea. The deployment would be quick, and much of our training would be split between the Korean training facility and Kuwait. A short visit home and then training, and then the long flight to the desert the dream would become very real very fast.

While the time in Iraq was both terrifying and awesome at the same time, the bible I carried in my breast pocket was a constant reminder that the Lord was with me always. When the bullets started flying, the bombs started to explode around me, the Lord’s protection was always there.

We fight for what we believe in. As for me, I fought because I wanted to make a difference. I wanted to take the fight away from the backyards of those I cared for. I wanted to gain worldly knowledge and build a better life for myself. I wanted to build a better tomorrow for the kids I would hope to have one day. While life never goes according to our plan, sometimes what we’re left with is far more beautiful. While Iraq wasn’t a spring day in the park, it was a learning experience, a growing experience. While not every experience was a positive one, in fact there were many experiences that now haunt me in my dreams, but the growth and life altering views, gave me a broad scoped worldview.

Fighting for those who you left behind, from family, to a woman, a man, your kids, anyone you care about is only part of the equation. While you start of as strangers fighting the fight also turns into fighting that fight for the brothers and sisters to your left and right. The brothers and sisters you gain while in the service will often last a lifetime. In that time you grow close, close enough that you would often lay down your life for your friends. John 15:13 “13 Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.” We fight for those next to us. Politics, world problems, all go out the window when the bullets start flying. While in the pursuit of peace the table gets messy. Politicians make plans, soldiers live in the real world. The real world is messy, bloody, and ends in nightmares after dark. We bare our cross so others don’t have to. Veterans day is a day to honor those who have fought and served this great nation. We fight so the freedoms this country stands for can be upheld.

Upon each soldiers entry to the military an oath is sworn.

I, _____, do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; and that I will obey the orders of the President of the United States and the orders of the officers appointed over me, according to regulations and the Uniform Code of Military Justice. So help me God.”

We must remember that when we swear an oath it’s our word, and our word should be our bond. Our heart should be pure in our intentions. 1 Kings 8:61”Let your heart therefore be perfect with the Lord our God, to walk in his statutes, and to keep his commandments, as at this day.” I was 19 years old when I swore my oath to the United States, and even though I’m no longer active duty, or reserved, or connected in any way to the military, I uphold that oath is just as important today as it was when I first raised my hand. To all those before me, and all those after me, I salute your sacrifice and service to the greatest nation on earth.

 

 

 

 

The Battlefield

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The Battlefield

The soldier’s armor is silver, it shines, glimmers in the light, freshly polished the scuffs from prior battles are barely noticeable after time and repair. The soldier stands at the front line of the battlefield. The sun glistens off the armor of him and the other soldiers. The sun shines on their backs and ahead of them an army of the hoard. An endless sea of black and death, led by the deceiver himself. The tension is high, the fear is thick and the rattle of the shields can be heard echoing in the valley. The calm before the storm, the moments before the word is given for the silence, the peace before the violence and the carnage begins.

The white flag is raised, the red Celtic cross ripples in the wind. The breath from the soldier is heavy as he closes his eyes for a fleeting moment. The smooth inhale and the hold, before exhaling every bit of air he had left. His eyes open, “protect me my Lord” he pleads to God above and he braces himself for what he knows is coming. His heart is torn knowing the men to his left and right may fall. He knows the battle will claim those he cares for. He knows the battle may very well claim his own life. The appearance of time seems to slow, as he can see the flag dropping forward. He sees a butterfly on the grass in front of him, only for a moment he can see each flap of it’s wings, the wind as it pushes the grass ever so slightly.

The flag drops and the rush starts. He raises his sword, shield in hand, the drum that is his heart pounds as the seconds before the crashing wave hits with the force of a hundred elephants. His shield crashes into the demons. Bones crack, and the blackness all around covers the eyes like a haze, an endless sea of darkness and the light of the sun that once shone so brightly is now gone. The thunder rolls and the rain falls. The sounds of metal on metal, bones on bones, flood the air and nothing but screams and death now fill the air. A sword swings on the soldier and it deflects off his sword. With his shield he hits the demon in the chest and it falls to the grown. He sees it now, lighting the dark sky the flaming arrows begin to rain down. The soldier ducks covering himself with his shield. The arrows never pierce his shield, they only bounce off, he reads the inscription on the inside of his shield. Ephesians 6:16 “Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked.” The soldier stands fast not moving to soon, waiting for the arrows of the Devil to stop for the time being. The Devil you see doesn’t care who gets hurt, doesn’t care about the collateral damage just so long as he’s able to hit one person. His demons do his bidding, no matter those who fall, even their own.

He’s knocked to the ground, kicked from behind; the spike of the spear pierces his armor on his side and punctures his flesh. He moves quickly from the attack and rolls from the following attacks. He swings his sword the blade etched in the steel Psalm 144:1 “Blessed be the Lord my strength which teacheth my hands to war, and my fingers to fight:” He prays to himself even in the midst’s of battle.” The Holy Spirit anoints me and protects me upon the day of battle, for the day of battle is at hand.” The battle continues, blow after blow defected with shield or sword. The soldier fights with every ounce of strength he has.

The battle turns and the demons start to get the upper hand. One by one soldiers across the field of battle fall. Brothers, fathers, sons, begin to be slain by the Devils minions. Another round of flaming arrows begins to fly in. The soldier hides under his shield, the arrows fall from the sky like rain. The field of battle is now dripping with water, blood, soaked in rivers that flow from the bodies on the ground. The soldier fights one enemy after the next. He continues the battle, slaying one demon after the next. The soldier is hit from behind, a blow that knocks him off his feet. He rolls to see the biggest of the demons he’s seen. The demon places the large foot over the soldier’s chest. Crushing under the weight, the soldier takes his dagger and stabs the demon in the calf. The demon stumbles back, and the soldier takes his sword and throws it. It strikes the demon in the middle of the chest sinking deep into the bone. The demon looks down at the sword before falling straight back.

Retrieving the sword the soldier takes a moment to look around the battlefield. Fighting continues, as the forces of evil are still holding the advantage. A black squall comes from the clouds and everything around its circumference explodes outward. The dust settles quickly, un-naturally, and there in the middle is the Dark Lord himself. Huge, the lord of darkness now stands toe to toe with the soldier. The soldier takes a few steps back to gain a little space. He looks around and he’s surrounded on all sides by darkness. The soldier rushed the prince of darkness and attacked. The soldier is knocked hard to the ground. One blow after the soldier is knocked to the ground, yet he continues to rise. The battle rages on.

The war seems lost, the fallen are many, the Devil continues to slaughter the men in droves. The soldier struggles now to stand. He’s bleeding, he’s battered, he’s bruised, and he struggles to breath. The strength is failing him. His helmet is cracked, his knuckles are black and blue, and he struggles to stand. How the blows of battle have taken their toll. The end seems neigh. When the soldier’s strength is about to fail he looks to the sky and remembers the words. Psalm 23:4 “Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.” He takes the sword raising to the sky, “Lord give me power, light up the darkness.” From the sky the darkness parted and the light from the sky shined down upon the sword, the strength of the Holy Spirit filled him and he could feel the power flow through him. He smashed the tip of the sword deep into the ground and the ground split. A light brighter then anything he’d ever seen exploded from the sword and the demon army faded away like a shadow does in the light.

The only demon to stand is the Devil himself, to stand-alone. With renewed strength the soldier walks to stand up to the Devil. The Soldier stands with what little army there was left behind him. Like David before him standing before Goliath, he stands tall. James 4:7 “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” Standing firm against the Devil and on the wings of the angels he leapt into the sky, sword raised, shield in hand he struck down the form of the Devil. He thrust the sword of Truth into the neck of the Devil, and the form crumbled to the ground.

Emerging victorious the ash settles and he faces the remaining soldiers on the field. The Devils army did extensive damage. The souls lost have never been in vein. Every day souls are lost to one thing or another. Time, disease, accidents, war, or even murder happen every day and children of the King go home. We all have to face the truth, and the truth is the Devil tries to come for us. He tries to tempt us away from what’s right, he tries to cause us to doubt, loose faith, to question everything to include our own existence.

The battlefield we all live in is life. We wake up every day and we go out into the world and we fight our battles. Every day we take hits, we fight the fight. Some days are better then others, some years are great, some are a struggle and some are like living in a fog. We can be beaten down, and some days we bleed. When the battle is no longer what we see on TV how do we get ready for the battle? How do we face the enemy when we meet on the field of battle? In as many months and years we’ve seen pure evil as our nations borders. The battles being waged are no longer on TV over the big pond, but right in our back yard. Incidence like Sandy Hook, Boston, Orlando, Vegas, and now most recently Sutherland Springs, have shows us we are no longer safe from evil. How many countless lives are lost to violence to evil? We can’t ever prepare for every battle we may face, but if we know the Lord and Savior, if we allow God into our hearts and submit ourselves to the King, then it doesn’t matter if we go out and loose the battle (our lives) because we know where we are going. Do not fear death, because death is the beginning of life. While we miss our loved ones who’ve passed we should also rejoice that they are in perfection. Our life is worth every minute because our lives are numbered by the days we’re in it.

It’s not easy to get back up when life has crushed your spirits. It’s not easy to face down the giant when you’re scared. It’s not easy to run into the fray when all hope seems lost. We may not always have the scripture in front of us right when we need it, but we can keep the words at our fingertips. We have Godly counsel to turn to, and if you’re like me, I wear a ring with the Armor of God passage. I wear an arrow necklace to remind myself who I am, I am Al-Sahm, and I know that I hold the bow and arrows for God. I am a soldier not just for my country, but more importantly for God. Remember to keep your armor and be ready when the battle comes to your back yard. There may come a day when God calls upon you to be a soldier. No matter what the battle may bring know the end for you will always be Heaven so long as you’re a soldier for the King. We can choose what side we’re on, and as for me, I choose the God that’s given me everything I have.

 

 

 

Not okay

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Not okay

Just because I’m not okay doesn’t mean I won’t be. Many people go through hell on earth, but the struggle many people have isn’t the event, but the aftermath of support. For whatever reason people in our world no longer give any amount of time to heal. People no longer accept that it’s actually okay to not be okay. This isn’t saying it’s okay to get stuck in that pain, but as long as you’re moving forward in getting out of that season, it’s okay in the moment to hurt, it’s okay to feel the sting that’s left behind, and what’s needed the most is love, support, and a measure of hope.

2 Corinthians 2:7 “so you should rather turn to forgive and comfort him, or he may be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow.” We are told to be there for our neighbors, to comfort them, to lift them up, and not tear down. Hebrews 10:24-25 “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” It seems as time goes on and the invention of social media, people have become far less concerned for their neighbors, their friends, even their family. People are no longer empathetic, or concerned with the well being of others.

I find as time continues on, we as a society have become less able to handle stress, less able to handle pain, and we’ve become far too sensitive. In the Book of Job, his friends didn’t sympathize, they didn’t show empathy, and they blamed him for his misfortune. His friends thought they were right, but God corrected that behavior. Job 42:7-8 7 It came about that after the Lord had spoken these words to Job, that the Lordsaid to Eliphaz the Temanite, “My wrath is kindled against you and against your two friends, for you have not spoken of Me what is right, as My servant Job has. 8 Now therefore, take for yourselves seven bulls and seven rams, and go to My servant Job, and offer up a burnt offering for yourselves, and My servant Job will pray for you. For I will accept him [and his prayer] so that I may not deal with you according to your folly, because you have not spoken of Me the thing that is right, as My servant Job has.” What is the message we are told over and over again in the Bible? Love, Love is the greatest of all things, and if we are not showing love to those in pain, to those who are in cheer, we are wrong. We cannot respond to sorrow with harshness, or anger. Ephesians 4:29 “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” It doesn’t matter if it’s your worst enemy, or if it’s your best friend, no matter how it is, everything you say should be to edify for Lord through you.

It’s okay to not be okay, it’s okay to have your bad days, to have your doubts, to struggle from time to time. It’s in our moments of struggle we need to raise our cries to the Lord. We cannot allow the world to beat us down so far we can’t get back up. It’s in that time we need to drop to our knees and pray vehemently.

 

 

The silence of the …..

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The silence of the …..

I’ve been thinking about my life and how I’ve gotten form A to B to C over these years. I remember when I was in 5th grade there was a lovely girl I was completely smitten with. The crush had lasted longer then just 5th grade but that’s when the feelings grew stronger. The feelings were more of a detriment then a blessing, in fact, they weren’t a blessing at all. Late in the year someone found out about those feelings and as things went pre internet, the whole grade knew before the end of recess, and the teasing began. It wasn’t because of her though, she was beautiful and popular, and every guy liked her. No, sadly the teasing was because of me, who I was. The teasing came because I wasn’t popular, I wasn’t handsome, I was nerdy, and I didn’t fit in very well. The teasing continued the rest of the year, never relenting. I even fell for the cruel joke that she wanted me to kiss her on the playground. They talked me into it, and needless to say it didn’t go well.

Over the next few years in school I met another women, and she was different. Not so different that I actually stood a chance, but sadly by the middle of 7th grade I would accidently let slip the woman who held my affection, and once again I became the laughing stock on the grade. I couldn’t catch a break. I was tortured for 3 years straight because I was different, because it was funny that I would like someone I stood no chance with, and when she was told, it brought her nothing but embarrassment. Of course though, who wouldn’t be? I wasn’t special in anyway, I wasn’t cool, I was more of an annoyance to those around me. Kids would hit me when I wasn’t looking, toss me around, push me and shove me into lockers and into people. I even experienced a swirly in my 7th grade year. That was the epitome of becoming the laughing stock of the school. The stares from kids of all grades, the whispers as I passed by, the chuckles and laughter reminded me daily of the shame I felt stepping foot in that school, or even out of my house. To say I became self conscious would be an understatement, I became horrified to be seen out and about, and I could barely look at myself in the mirror. I believed I was an ugly person, I believed no one would ever love me, I believed I would be alone forever, not a simple belief, no, a belief that would make it’s home deep down in my heart, the place the deep most powerful feelings reside.

Over the years things would improve but only just slightly. When I would finally move away I’d find a new home, a new school, and new chances. Although it never would end well for me, I continued to try and continued to try and put myself out there. Success wouldn’t be measured all that well, and fast forwarding 15 years, I’d say my luck hasn’t improved at all. Although what few friends I have left constantly tell me to be patient, and they are always telling me when someone walks away from me, or blows me off it’s their loss. As I recently stated before I can’t stand that saying.

Knowing what we feel inside, and fighting that feeling we hold deep inside is never easy. All we can do is know that we are children of the King, and what matters most is what God thinks of us. Even though we cannot see or feel or touch God, and we may want the affections of another person more then anything in this world, we can only close our eyes, silent our mind and pray. Quieting our mind is difficult. It takes practice, and it takes training. Matthew 6:6 “But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your Father who sees in secret will reward you.” A truth is found in Psalm 1 “Blessed is the man that walketh not in the counsel of the ungodly, nor standeth in the way of sinners, nor sitteth in the seat of the scornful. 2 But his delight is in the law of the Lord; and in his law doth he meditate day and night. 3 And he shall be like a tree planted by the rivers of water, that bringeth forth his fruit in his season; his leaf also shall not wither; and whatsoever he doeth shall prosper. 4 The ungodly are not so: but are like the chaff which the wind driveth away. 5 Therefore the ungodly shall not stand in the judgment, nor sinners in the congregation of the righteous. 6 For the Lord knoweth the way of the righteous: but the way of the ungodly shall perish.” It’s hard, but you have to remind yourself that the truth is not what others thing, or what you think, it’s what God the Almighty thinks of you. It’s a wonderful thing when we can let go of the pain in your heart. It’s special when you can feel the weight lifting off your shoulders. Even though I’m not there yet, I hope one day, I may be. I hope one day the demons that haunt me can finally be wiped away. The day may come, but sadly, the strength to do so escapes me today. Remember to always try and silence the negative feelings, try and put them away and look towards the sky and see the wonder of the stars, and remember that as infinite as the stars are, so are the possibilities. Just pray and pray, and work towards a brighter future.

 

Don’t Short Change Yourself

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Don’t Short Change Yourself

It’s not uncommon for someone recovering from an affair, or even after a long relationship to second-guess yourself. It’s easy to blame yourself, and feel at fault for the relationship falling apart. It’s easy to look back at your relationship and pick out everything you did wrong. It’s too easy to only focus on what you did wrong because they left you. One of the things that I’ve heard a lot lately is “it’s their loss.” I’m not sure I truly understand that. It seems to me if they felt they were loosing anything they wouldn’t have left. Even when time has gone by and they still haven’t come home, they obviously don’t feel they’ve lost anything. When time passes by and you don’t have anyone talking to you, no one shows interest, and you haven’t managed to score a date in all that time, yes, the simple truth is, it’s easy to fall into despair.

When you read through the life of David here’s a man that struggled with depression for most of his life. He fought years of depression and struggled with the regrets, the losses, the battles. David made some horrible mistakes, but also achieved a great amount. David was considered to be a man after God’s own heart. The choices we make define us. When we look into the fractured mirror and we no longer recognize who we are, it’s a miracle we need. We need to be able to wipe the slate clean and start fresh. What we need is Jesus. God wants for who we are in his eyes to be who we are. We can always turn our life around. We can always make the choice to turn back away from the self we don’t know for the self washed in the light of the Lord. Our new body, our new soul starts with allowing the worst parts of us to burn away in the flames of trials. God wants us with our scars, our shortcomings and our broken hearts. God knows we can be used no matter what our past may be. While this world races by sometimes far to fast, it’s clear that we are meant to be wherever we are, and all God wants is for us to see Him, to know Him, to cry out to Him, and above all trust in Him.

We may not always see it, we may not see our own self worth because perhaps we allowed someone’s acceptance of us to dictate our worth. Perhaps our jobs defined us, our status, or any other worldly viewpoint. We can’t change what the future may hold, but all we can do is define who we are by who we want to be. We are the masters of our own fate, by being a person that God would be pleased with. 2 Corinthians 4:8-9 “We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;” No matter the pain we suffering through it all we choose how we treat others. We may struggle, but if we hurt those around us, blame everyone else, we are no better then those who persecute us.

Psalm 34:17-20 “When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles. The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but the Lord delivers him out of them all. He keeps all his bones; not one of them is broken.” We must always remain faithful in our belief that God is with us. It’s in that belief that we can stand firm in the winds of change, stand firm when the ground breaks apart beneath our feet and still not fall. When we seek the Lord for answers, when we seek help, we can find it in Psalm 23 “The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. 3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. 4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. 5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. 6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.”

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 While life can take it’s toll and it can land many solid punches, it’s up to us to hold ourselves up with as much dignity as we can muster. It’s easy to let the Devil win and feel badly about ourselves. Self pity is easy to get into but we can face the beast and come up head held high. Simply put, don’t short change yourself, keep your head high and know that you’re on the winning side. Keep your faith strong, and remember that God is with you always.

Love Always, Always Love

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Love Always, Always Love

Where’s your salvation? Christ is our light, our rock, our only path. I’m a sinner, I’m a failure, I’m a success, I’m a lover. I’m occasionally a hypocrite, but as I fall short of the grace of God I know that my path will lead me to Christ because I know I need Christ, my only way to eternal love and grace. I am sometimes wayward, I am sometimes broken, but as promised God has never left me. When your lost and you see the world crumble around you come back to Christ, he will protect you. Believe in Christ with all you are, all your heart, and the Gates of heaven will be open for you when it’s your time. Never stop living for Christ. Never stop loving, never stop forgiving and never stop reading the word. Don’t put God in a box. Don’t expect grace if we don’t give grace. Don’t expect love if we don’t love. We must love God, we must glorify God, we must live like Christ would. Have the faith to follow, have the faith to jump off that cliff, have faith to take that leap. Follow, and don’t let fear keep you standing still. God chooses those who need the push. Let God work through you. We are nothing without Christ in our lives. Love like Christ loved us to give his life. Live like Christ lived to create our eternal home in perfection. Forgive others like Christ forgave us for the unspeakable acts we committed. Have compassion like Christ had compassion on those who tortured him, and the thief who hung from the cross next to him. It’s never too late to turn around from the path you’re on. It’s never too late to try and fix a mistake made. It’s never too late to apologize for those you’ve hurt, those you’ve let down. And always learn to forgive yourself.

 

Tick Tock

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Tick Tock

 Abraham waited for years for the son he never thought would come. He even disobeyed God and took his handmaiden and she bore him a child. God was angry at this because that wasn’t the plan, that wasn’t what Abraham was told to do. Job lived for years watching his entire life fall apart around him. He remained faithful and in his Faith he was justly rewarded. We can sit back and watch as time continues to move and as much as it may hurt, or bother us, time moves even if we don’t have the answers we may need or want. We are very impatient most of the time. The sad truth is, we don’t have a say when things work out or why. Things happen the way God wants them to, and all we can do is continue to show faith and effort.

Luke 1:37 “For with God nothing shall be impossible.”

Proverbs 3:5 “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.”

 It’s never easy to take a step back and realize how powerless we may be. Regardless of what we want, we can only have faith. No matter what situation we may find ourselves we can’t let the Devil get between God and us. We have to keep the faith because the consequences are much worse for denying God, then to face the world.

The clock ticks across time but we never know when that clock will stop. We never know when our clock may stop. Keep the faith in any season. We must always remember that the line of fate might be cut at any moment, and we don’t want to be caught unawares.

Colors of the Wind

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Colors of the Wind

Colors of the wind

You think the only people who are people

Are the people who look and think like you

But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger

You’ll learn things you never knew, you never knew

 

 The world turns 365 days. Throughout that time there are generally 4 seasons most will experience that time. Spring, the rebirth of nature, the trees, and plants start to bloom and sprout. The grass starts to grow again and becomes full and lush. Summer the hot season where the full experience of the new weather rings out with beautiful days, strong storms, and beautiful nights. The Fall is the beginning of the deaths cycle for the plants. Leaves turn colors and begin to fall. The weather cools, and the brisk nights and mornings start. Pumpkins grow and start getting ready for the holiday season. The winter comes, and the cold darkness of the night takes over. The days are short and the world seems darker. Neither season lasts forever and as long as some seasons may feel, at some point it is bound to end.

It’s said you can never step foot into the same river twice. Every day is a change for something new. Every day is a possible change, a chance to paint a new picture, a chance to get back up and fight the good fight again and again. 2 Pater 1:13-15 “13 I think it right, as long as I am in this body,[b] to stir you up by way of reminder, 14 since I know that the putting off of my body will be soon, as our Lord Jesus Christ made clear to me. 15 And I will make every effort so that after my departure you may be able at any time to recall these things.” We as Christians must always remember that as long as we wake up in the morning and we’re still breathing the end has not come and therefore a chance for change. “To be a Christian without prayer is no more possible then to be alive without breathing.” (Martin Luther)

When our seasons change how do we manage? Do we manage with grace and dignity? Do we allow the stress to be to much till the point of breaking where we escape using drugs or alcohol? Or do we wake up every day, look life dead in the eye and say “Not today, not today!” Satan wants us to fail, he wants us to give up when life gets hard. There’s nothing wrong with a little grumbling, there’s nothing wrong with venting and getting things off your chest, but make sure you are not allowing that to be your calling card. As difficult as it is no matter what season you find yourself, you must be able to see the positive things in your life. You’ve got to find the silver lining.

 

 

 

 

 

Survive To Thrive

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Survive To Thrive

In any life I’ve lived my life surviving one pitfall after another. I’ve faced death more then most and yet no matter the bitterness of the icy cold truth, I struggle as of late to see the bright future that waits. When I look back I have not seen long periods of peace in the war. The tragedies that have befallen my life have come like the rain, one drop after another. The storm rages on and I fear that tomorrow may not be as bright as I once hopped. The forces that surround me threaten to drag me down into the darkest depths. While these many days I’ve suffered many setbacks, I now am forced to retreat and regroup trying to decipher the new road being laid in front of me. I cannot see the path for it is dark and full of haze. The path before me seems as dark and treacherous as I fear. For every course I have peered, the thistles and thorns have covered it before my very eyes. Now, a new direction is needed, but it seems my compass is broken.

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The day rises and the fight begins again. By day the phone calls start, and the messages are left. No answers by time the sun sets, just more time waiting, wondering what my future holds. As my past has been a constant fight to stay afloat, it seems now, truly for the first time, I no longer know where to go, or what to do.

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What do we do when we know not what the future holds? Who do we turn to for help, for guidance, our guide through the darkness? The only thing we can do is breath, and trust, have faith in the Lord. On this day I feel much like doubting Thomas, or little faith Peter. Matthew 14:31 “And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?” When Peter stepped from the boat he was trusting, but when things began to look bad, he lost his faith and fell into the waters. Thomas doubted the risen Christ and demanded to stick a finger into his side where the spear had pierced the side of Christ.

It’s not easy to have faith when the stage is set and it’s full of darkness. It’s not easy to stay focused on the now when you cannot seem to escape. We must learn to have faith no matter the situation we find ourselves. Not an easy feat, but an important one never the less. James 1:6 “But let him ask in faith, nothing wavering. For he that wavereth is like a wave of the sea driven with the wind and tossed.” Some days all we can do is to take a deep breath and pray. We may not get the answers we need when we want them, but all we can do is have faith in God’s plan for us. We must have faith because the alternative isn’t pretty. Prepare for the fight ahead, but hope for the best.

We can hope that our reward for faithfulness is to make it through the wilderness and find ourselves being blessed. We don’t know how long it will take, but we know that the path is littered with turmoil and pain. The end can either be full of pain, or it can be full of cheer, it is up to us where we put our faith. While this doesn’t tell me where to go or which direction to take, I will pray about it, and hope that I hear back from the big guy upstairs.

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While I had been reflecting about my past, present, and looking to the future, I realized it had been a little while since I’d talked with one of my best and oldest friends. Upon realizing she was gone, Facebook was gone, among others. No warning, no phone call, no goodbye, just gone. I don’t know what lesson I’m supposed to learn, what I’m supposed to do, but in the last year I’ve lost all my close friends, I’ve lost my job, I’ve lost my health, I haven’t achieved any wins, and I haven’t been able to improve my situation. I just can’t seem to catch a break. I pray this season changes soon, because I honestly don’t know how much more loss I can take.

 

 

Not According to Plan

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Not According to Plan

Why is life so hard sometimes? Why do we fail, or hurt? When we don’t live up to who we think we should be, why is it so hard to stand back up? Why is the path in the light so hard? Why do people talk, why do people lie, why do people hurt? When the world around you falls to pieces, why can’t we ever put it back together? When we know what is right, when we know where to go, but feels like where stuck in the mud, or quicksand sinking the more we struggle. A heart in pieces, a dream crushed, but when our world falls, we turn to the heavens and shake our fists. What is God? What is faith? What is our life? God stays the same yesterday and tomorrow. God granted free will and because of that in the fallen world, people make selfish choices that often hurt others. We loose sight of our path that isn’t our path at all, but Gods path. God will lift us up and guide us if we only let go of our own selfish desires and follow Christ. Each day we live should be to glorify the Lord. God isn’t a Divine fairy that gives us our desires or our wishes. God gives us what we need when we need it. God is a father, not our best friend. God will punish us when we are bad, God will push us back to the right path in life. God is the reason we can breath every day. God is the reason that miracles happen. God is the God of all our days. Let go of the fear, let go of the doubt, let go of the pain and shame, follow God. When the world is harsh and cruel, lift up your head to the sky, raise your hands and give the worry and doubt to God. Let not the lies of Satan into your soul. Let not the doubts that the deceiver whispers into your ear take hold. Stand firm and fight back. For every Christian has a target on their chest and Satan wants your soul. Fight the fight, and lift your hands and heart higher.