The Fear – The Arrow Preacher

The Journeyman

I don’t know exactly where I am, or where I am going. As I have been reflecting on my life, I find myself stumbling. The road has been long, and now that the high of graduating is wearing off, the holidays are here, and I guess you could say I have the holiday blues. Do we trust ourselves? Do we trust how we feel? Is what we feel the truth, or is it a momentary stumbling block?

I think Christianity is a journey and on that journey someone discovers many truths. I’m not referring to the truth of Christ being the one and only way to the Father, but rather the truths that stream from the ebb and flow of who we are. Our selves are determined by the cells and genes that make up the physical aspects, but the environment shapes our minds. On this journey I have fallen down, and as of late, the depressive struggle has been very real for me. The days have come and gone since the many years ago I started down this road. In all reality I have looked to the world for answers, I have looked to scripture for answers, and still I find myself seeking something, and I don’t recognize myself in the mirror. There’s something to be said for not knowing who you are. When you don’t know who you are that means you can be molded. So many years ago I looked into the mirror and I didn’t know who I was. Many years ago I wrote a paper and I recalled writing this “You’re not worth anything. Why do you even get up in the morning?” (Fateful Night). I truly believed I wasn’t worth anything, and in all this time I have wondered who am I? I am the clay and Jesus is the potter. If Jesus is that interested in me, then I must be someone. Jesus has the whole universe at his disposal and billions of people, trillions of lifeforms, and out of all of that, Jesus loves and is still working on me. Head knowledge and heart knowledge don’t always talk to one another in the most reasonable of ways.

There’s so much in life that is complicated, and yet, simple at the same time. I’ve been looking for my place in the world since my wife left me three years ago. I’ve been trying to figure out what it was God was calling me to do. Over the years I’ve had my ups and downs, but I know that God is working with me. Is my place to help others? IS my place to preach the good word to others? Is my place to help others find their path? Is my place being a photographer, a writer, both? Is my place counseling other people?

If you’ve wondered where your place is in this world, have no fear, Jesus is near.

Proverbs 3:5-6 NKJV “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding; 6 In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall [a]direct your paths.”

While I have no idea where God is leading me I know that the Lord will direct my path. Sometimes the path is long, because it takes time to make our courage strong. (hard love)

Psalm 37:23-24 “The steps of a good man are [a]ordered by the Lord,

And He delights in his way. 24 Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down;

For the Lord upholds him with His hand.”

Just because we don’t know the destination doesn’t mean we need to know right now. Just because we might seem lost, doesn’t mean we have anything to fear. We should not fear the destination, or the journey. Scripture teaches us that we are not given a spirit of fear, but one of hope and courage.

Isaiah 41:10 NKJV “Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”

2 Timothy 1:7 (NKJV) 7 “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

In this journey we will face trials, we face hardships, and sometimes we face a measure of uncertainty, but in every day, we know that we have a place to send our fearful thoughts.

Psalm 56:3 (NKJV) 3 “Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You.”

Who am I? I’m a child of the King, I am wonderfully made and I know that in my times of fear, I know where I can put it. It’s okay to not know where we are headed, but we should not be afraid of the journey. This is a long journey, one with many ups and downs, and even when the storms come, shelter under the wings of the Angels.

Who am I supposed to be, and what am I supposed to do? I think perhaps I am a hiker, and instead of worrying about the destination, I spend some time to take a look around where I’m at and enjoy the scenery right here where I am. What about you? Where are you, where are you going, and who do you want to be? Enjoy the adventure of life, and try not to stress over the things we can’t control, which is just about everything. Control what you can, let go of the rest, and enjoy the ride.

Bright Tomorrow?

The darkness fills the room. The lights go out and blindness is the word of the night. How we cannot see when the darkness is all around us. When choices weigh you down, and you can’t seem to lift your head off the pillow it’s so heavy like a pile of bricks. The darkness spreads, it’s an evil entity with a mind of it’s own. It follows you, it stalks you, it hunts you in the light of day, and in the darkness of night. The shadows weigh you down, and if it catches you, it may very well crush you.

When you run from the darkness where are you running? What are you running from? We all have our shadows, and we all have the darkness inside us. It’s fear, and doubt, it’s the bad traumas we face, and it’s the hopeless nights that haunt us. We feel the weights pile on, and we watch as the weight on our shoulders weighs us down dragging our shoulders to the ground. The literal weight of our own cross drags us to the ground and if we aren’t careful it’ll crush us into the dirt. Have no fear though, there’s hope just on the horizon.

1 Corinthians 9:26 “So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air.” How do we fight the darkness? We must remember that the darkness are the lies and the self flagellants we push upon ourselves. The Devil wants to use our fears and doubts against us. The Devil wants us to struggle with our past mistakes and our past failings. We know that the world isn’t a fair or kind place, but when it feels like more then you can hold, you know who to call, and no not the Ghostbusters.

When the world is more then you can take you gotta call upon the one and only strong enough to get you through, Jesus Christ. Christ will carry you through, Christ will left you and protect you. We have our trials, we have our hurdles we may face, but no matter what it is, it’s never to big for God. Give us strength oh Lord of all to help us through. I don’t have to be strong enough because I am never alone. Christ gives me strength to push away the demons who attack my weaknesses, Christ gives me strength to light up the darkness and make the enemy of the night flee before the light of the cross.

Heavens mercy upon us is strength for this world, it’s hope, and it’s a way to push beyond the fear. We can always count on the Lord to be with us. We can always hope and pray for the best, but we know the fight will come, and we must always be ready. We can’t let our past weigh us down. We can’t allow our pain to forge our future. We must learn to embrace the pain, and use it for a better tomorrow. We draw a line in the sand and we choose to fight. How can we fight if we are weighed down with our own fears and doubts? The world is hard enough to face, let alone face it when we are over encumbered. The Devil wants us to go to war with the fear and doubts, the pain, the hatred we hold in our hearts. How can we share the light if our own light is subdued by the stained hearts we have? The fact is, is you’re going to stand you need to go toe to toe with the darkness. There’s only room enough for one of you in this world, and it’s either the one that embraces the light to forge ones self in the fire, or those who embrace the darkness and forever lives in the shadows of misery. You can’t forge steel without the flame, so who are you going to be? Are you going to be the one to fall on your face and stay down, or are you going to embrace that fire, and fight the Devil? You need to realize you’re more then the bad decisions, you’re more then the pain, you’re more then the lies the devil tries to spread. You need to have the faith that allowed the clouds to part, the giants to fall, the seas to split, and the sins of the world to break the temple in half. Don’t be afraid of the darkness because with God anything’s possible. The fight is coming no matter what we may want. You have to learn to be ready for it, and when it comes know how to fight back. Trust in God and believe in the impossible. God doesn’t just have the big stuff, but the small details too. Don’t let the darkness scare you because if you are walking with the Lord you aren’t in the darkness. It may creep up on you, but stand firm on the heels of Christ and you can defeat the Devil when the battle knocks on your door.