Tag: scripture

Letting Go of Spiritual Debt 1 of 2

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Letting Go of Spiritual Debt 1 of 2

Do we hold onto our spiritual pain? Do we allow ourselves to let our pain pile up and one day realize we’re being crushed by it? We’ve built up our spiritual debt, and it’s time we start cutting those cards and be rid of them. Has our pain been marketed that we must keep it all to ourselves? Have you been told, a man doesn’t talk about his feelings because if he does he’s not a real man? Even women today don’t talk or express their emotions. We have gotten to the point where we hold onto that pain, and we allow ourselves to throw it in the closet and we don’t deal with it. I’d like to point out that the Devil is the lender of bad feelings, the bank that holds the negative spiritual debt. Proverbs 22:7 “­­­­­­The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower is the slave of the lender.” When we allow those feelings of loss, the feelings of self worth, the feelings of worth, all the negative feelings we have we have become slaves to the Devil. This is not just hyperbole, but in fact we have become a slave to those feelings, and we cannot see the love if we don’t pay down those feelings, and learn, we don’t need them in our life. We must count on scripture and we must remember that the Lord says loosely in Jeremiah 1:5 “I have loved you before you were born.” The battle within often considered as the battle of good and evil is a challenging thing. While we will always struggle with the good thoughts, the negative ones will also be there. The battle within is ongoing, and we must learn to handle them, and face them, head on.

I myself have found I am a slave to those feelings. I have struggled with all of those feelings and I have learned that those feelings are exactly what the Devil wants from me. The Devil has taken control of those negative thoughts and if we are to truly be free of two masters, we can only have one, Jesus Christ. While I’m not saying we will never have those negative feelings, what I’m saying is, don’t allow yourself to be stuck in those feelings. If we are to get into scripture, we will find that many figures in scripture suffered with depression. David, who wrote the majority of the Psalms, suffered through great amounts of depression. All feelings have a place in this world, but we can’t allow ourselves to be sucked into the lies of this world.

The Devil wants us to be held down in those chains. The Devil wants us to believe the lies, and instead, what we need to do is realize that we’re being lied to, and focus on the Love and Importance of our lives to God. We need to recognize the Lord’s value for us is far beyond anything we could ever imagine. The Lord wants us to be able to face our challenges, face our crucibles, and understand that if we can get through them, we can share our crucibles with others. Allow ourselves to make it through the fire with our head held high. If we allow our self to be slaves to the fear, to the feelings of worthlessness, the feelings of self loathing, we will be buried under them, and we cannot be a good witness to those around you. Let me explain this for a moment. Feelings are normal, and sometimes you will have feelings of depression, and that doesn’t make you a bad Christian. Feeling down, and the occasion question of your own self worth, those are lies, and we all get off track sometimes. When those feelings come up, if you sit back and you allow yourself to be buried under them, that’s when you face the problem. When you are hit with those feelings, but you are making progress to get yourself out of it, and you force the Devil away, that’s the difference.

Someone told me recently I shouldn’t publicly talk about going through high anxiety, and at the same time trying to inspire others. Here’s where I stand on that; those who go through struggles and can still get up every day, and still talk about the graces of God and what God’s done for them, is so important. Make no mistake, BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO CHRISTIANS! Sometimes bad things happen often, and sometimes the season lasts a while. Bad things happen long enough and people loose hope. Here’s the thing, I have endured a long time going through more bad then most people go through in a lifetime. Now my life hasn’t been as bad as many others, but I understand that it’s in those struggles, regardless of the length, that we should be able to share the most for others to see. In those struggles that we all go through, we share our struggles with others, and then we show one another how to carry on. We must not loose our hope. We must be the Gazelle and run for our lives. We must learn to run from the cheetah and have the motivation to run from the Devil who’s trying to eat you for dinner. If you want to survive the struggles, share them with others, ask for prayers, get help when you need it, but don’t allow yourself to get caught and eaten. If you are going to outrun the Devil let go of the weight on your shoulders. Bad things happen to everyone and if we are to hold weight in our world, we need to be able to relate. God sent Jesus as a baby to live and grow as a mortal man. He experienced life in all it was. We relate to Christ because we can relate to those struggles. Don’t hide your struggles because it’s in the troubles others can look upon you and say, ‘If they can do it with their struggles, so can I!” Turn to others, and ask questions, find out how they made it through the crucible. Your heavenly father loves you, and is rich beyond our comprehension. Pray for your salvation free from the bondage of sin. Pray for your emotions that they line up with the Love God Has For You! Don’t fall victim to the Devils lies. Share your experiences and lift others up with Hope and Love, and the Word of God. Pay down your spiritual burdens, and overcome. Do not feel you must go forth and manage your burdens alone. Do not feel you must struggle to carry your cross by yourself. Do not judge me because I have troubles; instead judge me because I stand in spite of my troubles. When you are in the middle of spiritual warfare find others to help lift you. Find those who will guide you in the ways of the truth, and the light, and of Jesus Christ.

Do not judge others by a snapshot of their life. Do not rebuke others because of their troubles, instead help lift, and guide, and show grace, and mercy and above all show Love. Be a beacon of hope in another life and share wisdom and comfort in others time of need.

Stay Tuned, Same Blog Time, Same Blog Channel. Tomorrow we’ll talk about how to take your problems to the Lord, and how to get help carrying your burdens. The nutshell “Got a Problem? Bring it to me sayath the Lord.”

 

 

A YEAR OF BATTLE AND IM STILL HERE

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A YEAR OF BATTLE AND IM STILL HERE

 1 Thessalonians 4:11 “and to aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own affairs, and to work with your hands, as we instructed you,” When I read this verse it makes me think of my own life and my own longing for a life of parenthood. I dream of a life with a loving wife, in a nice house, quiet and away from the affairs of the world. I dream of my future, and I look to leave my past in the past. The thing about the past though it’s never truly gone. It stays with us, and it lives inside us. As I have been looking back at my life I have been forced to realize I’m still here. This battle I’ve been facing hasn’t been easy, and there have been times when I’ve just wanted to quit, but the sun rose, and the sun fell, and I’m still drawing breath. Psalm 18:39 “For you equipped me with strength for the battle; you made those who rise against me sink under me.” No matter the wars I’ve faced, I know the Lord has given me the tools I’ve needed to face them. We are told that for everything we endure, we are being trained up for future trials. Psalm 144:1 “Of David. Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle;” For the Devil has attacked and waged war with my heart and mind, yet I still stand. While I have struggled and I have stumbled, I have always found a way to pick myself back up.

No matter where we are in our travels of this sometimes cruel world, we must keep the eye on the prize. The battles will be waged throughout your entire life. We will win some, and we will loose some. In my year long battle of the war, I’ve lost a fair amount and just stating the facts, I’ve lost more then I’ve gained. I have struggled through the loss of deep, long running friendships. I have lost positions at work, posts that I worked very hard to achieve. I have lost my way a time or two within my own personal feelings, and I have sometimes struggled to find my way back. Our travels may be smooth sailing, or rough seas but no matter the weather, we must learn to keep moving forward. Deuteronomy 31:6 “6 Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” In the strongest storms, have faith in the Lord. Find your strength in God and fear not.

Psalm 34:17-18 “The righteous cry out, and the LORD hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” While the delivery of our troubles might not be that very same moment, or even days or years down the road, salvation is the end game, and the fluff in the middle doesn’t really matter. What matters is the path to Salvation. Through the battle and the blood, the sweat, the tears, the end result is what’s the most important. For us as Christians, our goal is salvation, eternal, in the gates of Heaven. Our path to Heaven is important, how we handle each and every one of our situations. We must remain vigilant to our own emotions and how we let them dictate our path. In the world we live in the battles we will face in this great big war of ours will either be considered as a success or failure, but it’s in those things we must use a clear head, and a clear heart to be the man or woman that would best be pleasing to God.

No matter the difficulties I have been faced with, I still feel as if I am a positive light for others. We all have our scrapes and cuts from the walk we’re on, but those wounds should make us tougher, smarter, more seasoned. One can hope that as we grow, we are also growing closer to God. Always grow in your path, and one day, that path will lead you home.

 

The Dark

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The Dark

The darkening cave surrounds you, the air thick and heavy, the pounding in your ears and the fear takes hold. Close your eyes, and extend your hand. Even in the darkest of days, a connection with faith, and you can be pulled from the deepest abyss. I have often felt as if my solitude were some kind punishment. I felt as if my inability to explore and make friends was something I had done wrong. Nothing seemed to be working and I felt as if I were in a cave all-alone. I have felt as if the darkness was overtaking me, and I never knew how far I’d slip. As the darkness spread it seemed as if most of the areas in my life would be affected. The truth was, and is, when pain is what causes the darkness it’s hard to find the light. The darkness is like an infection. Once it gets inside it’s hard to be rid of it. There are many things that can cause the darkness, insecurities, jealousy, and several forms of fear. There’s a fear in me of being alone. I fear I will be along for a long period of time. One of my biggest issues is basing my self worth on what others perceive in me. I have always allowed others acceptance of me to bring me down when they don’t.

The loneliness I’ve been dealing with seems to be a lingering problem. I know for sure, an undoubted fact that the Devil has been working overtime lately, feeding me lie after lie. I have sunken into a more depressed state, feeling alone, and questioning my own mortality. I’m not talking suicidal thoughts, but the wondering motif of the past, and thinking I missed out on a more deserved fate. These lies come straight from the pits of Hell, and it’s important to at least realize the source if we are to better fight against it. The Devil will try to attack you, finding the cracks to get in. Once the Devil gets in, the small speck turns like a seed to a plant spreading it’s evil fines throughout your life. What line of defense do you have to protect yourself from the trails and tribulations that will befall you? We know that scripture teaches us to turn to God for our strength. We are taught to guard our heart, and protect our mind. We are taught to use the armor of God and not allow ourselves to fall victim to the spiritual warfare that we are actively engaged in. The dark cannot exist when you shine the light on it. The light can only exist if you choose not to sit in the darkness. You have to choose to leave the darkness behind and fight to stay in the light.

Fighting depression, anxiety, hopelessness isn’t ever easy, but it’s something we must endure, and learn to fight back against. The darkness is in all of us. We all have the ability for great evil, but also great love. We will always have a choice in this life to follow the path of light or dark. We will make choices every day, and sometimes we may actually believe that what we are doing is what’s best, but I heard a sermon recently, your heart can be deceived and therefore you shouldn’t trust it. The heart can be fooled into feeling a great many things, and it’s in Christ we find our Godly wisdom. We won’t always make the best of choices, and we won’t always follow the right path, but if we truly trust in the Lord, and believe that we are doing what would be bring glory to God, then we stand a chance to living our life in the light, and not the dark. I’ve seen men and women walk a path, and just at the snap of your fingers something or someone comes along, a viper in the weeds to lure them to the dark side. Lust presents itself as love, and how often do we as a people try to do what’s best for us in the name of love? When we are fooled by the feel good emotions, the drug in which many marriages, and friendships have fallen into ash, then we see the darkness that has covered our very world.

While I find myself fighting the darkness from rising, and I have considered myself a failure by all right, I know where those lies come from. The struggle is real regardless. Your feelings should always be lined up with the situation to know that your feelings are validated. We all have good and bad feelings, and sometimes our life’s struggles cause us to feel badly about ourselves. It’s hard to manage what you feel, and what you know you should feel. I know I shouldn’t feel worthless, and I know I shouldn’t question my own mortality. The fight is real, and the challenges don’t necessarily get any easier as time goes on. We know we need to turn to others in our time of need, but more importantly the Lord. We know we can’t keep ourselves on our own island, keeping us secluded. Isolation is unhealthy and we are easily picked off when we’re alone. We are weakest by ourselves, and we need to find strength in numbers. Don’t keep yourself secluded, go out and find yourself in the light. Stay out of the darkness because the darkness can take hold, and if we aren’t careful, it doesn’t let go easily.

Shadows In The Dark

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Shadows In The Dark

Have you ever lain in your bed, the room dark, with shadows dancing around the walls? The fear those shadows instill in a young boy. The constant terror a child will face, afraid of the monsters looming around the void of light. We grow up and we learn that some of those shadows are no more then the tree outside dancing in the wind. We learn not to let our imagination run wild in the dark. What if some of those shadows weren’t shadows at all, but the Devil and his minions, his Demons from Hell that are taunting you, playing with your emotions, and bringing you the fear. As we get older temptations and fear, and even the lies people will utter have a deep impact on us and our fragile sensibility. When someone spreads lies about you it hurts your feelings. When people are cruel for no reason but their own insecurities it doesn’t feel good. Over the years I’ve lost many of my friends due to the insecurities of others. The struggle to maintain friendships as you get older has gotten harder then ever. When Facebook released I thought keeping and maintaining friendships would have been easier, instead I think it’s gotten harder. The problem is, with the invent of social media, and apps, the secret life has become very common. I think the paranoia of everyone has in fact infected everyday relationships. The truth is, the Devil has found new and creative ways to break into the hearts and minds people everywhere.

It’s difficult when you are trying to make friends. There’s so much fear, and insecurities, and distrust in the world today it makes it hard to make and keep friends. We see the scripture actually talks about social media in a way. 1 Corinthians 15:33 “Be not deceived: evil communications corrupt good manners.” Social media has given the ability to now hide communication, and lie and cheat your way through life. As friendships come and go today we find ourselves in a world that cares very little for truth, honesty, or loyalty. It’s important that we look to those in our lives that are closest to us. We need to find our brothers and sisters in Christ. It’s in that, that we will find those who will not just be a friendly hello, but those who will be there for us in our times of adversity. Proverbs 17:17 “A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.” Friends will come and go, but those friends who become more, that become like family, those are the people that you need to water and cultivate and allow it to grow and flourish. Proverbs 18:24 “A man [that hath] friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend [that] sticketh closer than a brother.”

Don’t let the shadow overtake you. The struggle of loosing your friends, your loved ones, is very real and it happens to many. The storms will come and go, the trials, and the turbulent weather will toss you around like a dogs chew toy. The war for our hearts and minds is fought in the shadows. The war for our very soul is fought every day in the darkness. We must remember that the Devil will sway those away from us, and when that happens all we can do is pray for them, and move forward in our lives. There are plenty of new flavors to allow the Devil his tricks, but we have to be strong and fight the fight. We have to continue to fight and never let go. The last thing we want to do is be one step away from turning the corner we can’t turn back from. We can only do so much to help those who’ve fallen victim to the lies. We have to keep pushing forward and try to bring the light to the darkness. I’m reminded of the Jorker from The Dark Knight. Are we just one bad day from crossing the line? Are we one bad day from embracing the darkness? We must continue to fight against that and remember Jesus is the light of the world and is always with us.

 

Brace For Impact

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Brace For Impact

Brace for impact is a common phrase found on aircraft or ships that are about to hit something else. We as Christians should know that in our lives it’s not a matter if the crash may come, but when. When we follow Christ we know that we will always have the Devil nipping at our heals. It’s only a matter of time before the Devil gets us in his sites, and the targets on our minds and our souls will be his focus. He probes through our thoughts and finds our weaknesses. He tries to trip us up in our walk with the Lord, and he tries to break our spirits. The crash will come and our survival will depend on how well we can brace for the impact when it comes.

The Storm Comes

 No matter how careful we are to avoid conflict, or even if we avoid people, the storm will one day find you. You can follow all the rules, dot all the I’s and cross all your T’s but no matter how careful you are, the storm finds each and every one of us. When we look to scripture it’s very clear on this point. John 16:33 “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” Struggles come in many forms. They come in money, in conflict with people, loosing your job, or in physical ailment, but no matter how it comes, the impacts can be catastrophic. For me, my war isn’t money anymore, it’s not conflict with others either, it’s being alone. My biggest battle is the battle for my heart. The wounds I deal with are consistently at the forefront of my mind. The loss of my wife to divorce, the loss of my friends and family, and the failure of my body mixing with the ability to get to a better place has been a complete uphill battle. In the military we are taught to be on alert, to always look for danger, and to prepare for battle all the time. Luke 21:36 “Be alert at all times. Pray so that you have the power to escape everything that is about to happen and to stand in front of the Son of Man.” When we prepare ourselves we learn to feel the change in the wind, we learn to allow ourselves to be more perceptive, but we must learn to handle the day when the storm bares down on us at full force.

Temptations

 The time will come when the Devil will nip at your heals, and do everything to tempt you, to get you to fall flat, to walk away from everything you hold most dear. We will spend our lives fighting the temptation that will knock on our door. The lies that we are told every day from the Devil are to distract us, to draw us away from the mission. The Devil will break down our walls, and he will try to take everything we hold in our hearts. He tries to take our loved ones, our friends, and our relationship with God. 1 Peter 5:8 “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” We must remain alert before the rash, during the crash, and after the crash. Remain clear minded, and vigilant. We must learn to find way to face the fire every day. We must learn to keep our faith, our strength when the wolf growls at the door. The wolf will come and when it does we must stand tall, stand firm, and be ready for anything.

The Trials

 No matter the form of the trials everyone’s different and no matter what it is, it’ll have an affect. The way we handle any given situation has as many paths as the human brain has synapses. What we say, or what we do, all of which will change any passing moment. What do you do when the plane is crashing down? When you’re in the seat and you have no control? Do you place your head between your knees and pray to God for safety? Do you ask for forgiveness? Do you thank God for the life lived and ask for peace of your loved ones? Sometimes when the crash comes we aren’t in control. Sometimes when the world falls down around us we don’t’ have control over the car, but we do have control over ourselves. We’re never alone in the trials, and we always have our options. 1 Corinthians 16:13 “Watch ye, stand fast in the faith, quit you like men, be strong.” Although we will find ourselves in the fight of our lives sometimes we must have faith that in that fight we aren’t alone. Rest assured that the Holy Spirit is always with you.

I was in Iraq on September 12th 2004. It was early in the morning when our mission started. A joint operation with the Marines and as simple as the mission should have been it wasn’t. Before the mission had a chance to get underway an IED (Improvised Explosive Device) was in the road causing the mission to change. What started as a massive door to door raid turned into an EOD mission. That was until the truck in front of me took two IED’s and small arms fire. Soon after their truck was hit, my truck was hit. We were led into a well coordinated attack, an ambush that would nearly destroy my own truck, and do heavy damage to both vehicles. I remember when the first bullet hit my door. My truck had taken several rounds to the hood prior to my door getting hit, but in my own mind the situation got real when that bullet bounced off my door. As both hands move to the wheel I felt a warm comfort flow over my whole body. I felt as if my hands were being guided and I felt completely at ease. As RPG’s (Rocket Propelled Grenades) flew overhead, or just barely missed the truck (12 counted) none made direct contact. Even though the damage to my truck was severe, we made it back safely with no injuries between the two trucks involved. I know beyond a doubt the Holy Spirit was with us that day. Ecclesiastes 11:8 “But if a man live many years, and rejoice in them all; yet let him remember the days of darkness; for they shall be many. All that cometh is vanity.”

 We often find ourselves excited about upcoming events, but we never truly know what tomorrow brings. How often are we disappointed when the plan goes off the rails? Proverbs 27:1 “Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring.” I don’t think this means we shouldn’t get excited, instead be understanding when something comes up to change the plans, and understand that the events unfolding are still within the will of God. The Devil will interfere with our lives by pulling people away, tempting others to fall pray to their own sinful desires. In that we must understand tomorrow is never guaranteed. We must always seize our day and make the best of what we have in the moment. Luke 21:19 “Stand firm, and you will win life.” This comes with a measure of endurance and we need to be ready for the joys to come our way, be ready for the temptations that come our way, and be ready when the impact comes our way.

Plan For it

Before the plane takes off the safety briefing is displayed. It’s the plan for what to do in the emergency. The Bible also offers our instructions for the emergencies. When you truly read the Bible there’s not much you would see today that didn’t happen back then. There may be all kinds of new flavors of Sin, but the sin at the rout is still the same. No matter what you’re experiencing you can find the how to located in the Holy Word of God. We need to first see the emergency and once we do that we can identify what it is. Proverbs 22:3 “The prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it.” It’s not always prudent to run into the fray. Sometimes it’s better to seek shelter to weather the storm. We must remember that most attacks on us no matter if it’s the wife leaving you, a death in the family, a loss of a job; it’s all an emotional attack. The mind is the biggest thing we face attacks on. When we look at the Apostil Paul, a man who was beaten, ship wrecked, thrown to the lions, verbally and physically attacked, no matter what he faced, he never lost his spirit, or his way. We must always be ready for our crash and expect that it’s not a matter of if, but when it’ll come. Don’t be a cynic and always expect the worst, on the contrary, always hope for the very best. Prepare however for the crash just in case.

 

What’s In Your Heart?

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What’s in your heart?

17 months and I haven’t had any nibbles. I realized for every one worm there’s 15-30 fish. The women just dangle the worm and doesn’t have to do anything. So women, they get to pick the biggest shiniest fish out there. The thing with social dating sites is the emphasis on the physical attraction, and what’s written in the profile is glazed over. While we know what scripture says about your outward appearance, and what God thinks is most important. People will judge others, while God judges the heart. 1 Samuel 16:7 “But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” Why can’t we look beyond the flesh to the soul within?

I was told recently that in all of the dating apps out there women are focused on the looks, and because they get so many men to choose from those who look like models are often picked up first, and those who do not, well, they fall to the wayside. Sadly it seems my fish analogy is spot on. While I change my photo’s regularly, and I update what’s written often, as to keep my profiles lively. This however hasn’t changed the outcome, or my luck.

For several or more years I have often been guilty of allowing those who’ve hurt me to remain in my life after a period of time. Someone hurts me and months or years later they pop back up into my life, and once again I allow them access to my life. More often then not, over time that renewed friendship is broken and often in the same it was broke the first time. I have always believed that people are human and they make mistakes. We look only to our own pleasure, the pleasure in someone’s looks, or the pleasure they bring to our lives, and when that pleasure is gone, we as a people move on. I have always tried to look into a person’s heart and see the best in them. We should always learn to seek the heart after God, and not the outer shell. We should always seek ones true self, the actionable, the outward appearance of one’s inner self. True people will hurt you, people will make mistakes, but it’s important not to be taken advantage of.

Learning what’s in someone’s heart is important. It’s important not to be unequally yoked. 2 Corinthians 6:14 “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?” In all the time I’ve been trying to get back into dating I have maintained my search for a Christian women to give my heart too. While I have found myself wrestling with my current situation I find that in my heart I am becoming weary. I am tired of seeking people only to be lied to, and dismissed. The thing with our society these days is based so much out the outward appearance. The sad thing about that is, looks fade. Love no longer matters, and people are so easily offended and scared away, that it makes communication a dying art. We don’t take the time to get to know anyone anymore. We don’t take the time to learn about someone, ask them questions, have long heart felt talks, and more importantly, to bond with someone. I’ve found friends that come and go so easily aren’t truly happy with themselves. Lovers who leave for no reason, who give up everything once worked for, are truly broken inside.

If you want to look at someone’s heart, you should look to how they’ve handled rejection. Look at how they handle conflict, and dealt with difficult people. It’s in those moments when they are forced to make a choice. We have both light and dark inside us, and we are always capable of both extraordinary love and compassion, or deep-seated hate and resentment. When you look at someone’s behavior you will get a glimpse of who they are. Sure people are human and there will be times when they don’t put their best foot forward, but when you look at an overall representation, you will see that when the heart is tested, the true nature will rear it’s head. A person who out of anger slashes someone’s tires, or makes up stories and lies, or sells a house full of items behind someone’s back, that person is angry, and vengeful. On the other hand, a person who gives friendly gifts, or offers a shoulder to cry on, or rescues someone from a current boyfriend who’s beat them, regardless of the things done, you can see the difference in the heart. People most always disserve a second chance. People always disserve forgiveness. When we are looking for friends, or for love, we need to remember to look at actions, and look at patters to show one’s heart. “It’s not who I am underneath, it’s what I do that defines me!” (Batman Begins)

 Show your heart and make no mistake that you are beautiful on the inside. There’s a line from the suicide squad that got me thinking. Captain Boomerang (Digger Hartness) was talking to Harley Quinn, he said this, “You know, outside you’re amazing. But inside, you’re ugly.” (Suicide Squad) The thing is when we judge a book by its cover we never truly see what lies beneath. When we look only at what’s on the outside we will often miss the beauty that God created on the inside. Someone as beautiful as Harley Quinn is perfect on the outside but on the inside she’s as broken as they come, and crazy isn’t a strong enough word to describe her. We as Christians need to do better with how we treat others. We need to do better with that big J word that’s floated around and we claim we never do, but we do, and that’s pass judgment. We do it every time we look at someone, every time we talk with someone, and it’s caused a lot of pain and heartache for people. It’s time we learn to look beyond the outer shell, and look more deeply. We should be curious to get to know our brothers and sisters. We should be curious to connect and reach out, and help those in need. We cannot sit idly by and do nothing when our neighbor’s heart is broken. We must share in the joy of life, and help when that joy is broken. We should want to extend our hearts to those in need, and stop judging people by what we see.

I have learned a hard lesson in the last year, and that’s people aren’t what I thought. I never realized how shallow, and selfish people can be on the whole. While I’m obviously not talking in absolutes, black and white, I am talking about the majority, or at least from my vantage point. See we can only come to conclusions based on what we see, what we experience, and although that may not be a fair assessment, it’s the only one some people have. In my experience online dating is a farce, and people are shallow and cruel. While I hope one day to be proven wrong, thus far, the evidence I’ve gathered doesn’t show that. A 30 something, white male, with average looks, and a standing Christian, just doesn’t seem to be what attracts women these days. Now let me say this, attraction is very important in any relationships, and marriage. This cannot be the soul purpose to a relationship though. Looks fade and we must trust in the heart over the eyes. While I have undoubtedly not raised many eyebrows, I realize I cannot give up hope. Every day is a new chance, a new opportunity, and in my search for my counterpart, I realize that in all things we must understand that it’s God’s schedule, not our own that matters. Patience and understand are virtues we must learn to embrace. If you’ve have trouble finding love as I have, don’t give up hope. Remember that prayer alone is not everything, but action is just as important. We must learn to allow prayer and guidance to move our feet in the right direction. We can pray for money, but if we don’t work towards it, it’s not going to show up on our doorstep. Love is the same way. We must go out and be apart of the world. We can’t just sit by and hope it comes to us. We have to have faith, but have action. Show others what’s in your heart, and don’t hide away from your true nature just because you want people to like you. If someone doesn’t like you because you’re a nerd, or you’re a Christian, or you build Lego sets for fun, then they aren’t right for you. Stay strong in your search, and don’t forget to pray about it. Don’t forget to thank God for what you have, and never give up hope. One day your waiting will pay off, and the right things will come to you.

 

 

 

Play the Long Game

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Play the Long Game

I was thinking recently about prayer. Why do we pray to God, and how do we think about that relationship? I’ve recently found myself frustrated that after all this time my prayers hadn’t been answered. I found myself thinking I had done something to upset God and therefore I wouldn’t be getting His grace. I kept thinking to myself ‘I spend all this time lifting others up, I help people and I guide them in the light of the Lord. So why am I left without the one thing I really want in this world?” While this question taunted me in both my dreams and my waking moments, it finally dawned on me. I remembered when I was younger. I was 15 years old and I was having some family problems. Long story short I needed to change my situation and I needed to make a move that would be permanent. With few options I realized I might have to move in with my Grandfather. With a little effort the move with my Grandpa was rather seamless. His house had 3 bedrooms so size wasn’t an issue. The school there was rumored to be a great school and smaller, much smaller so that would actually work out for me. The thing is, Grandpa had been trying to sell his house on and off for a few years and had absolutely no luck. Had his prayers been answered I wouldn’t have had a place to go in my time of need. For me moving to Big Rapids was the best choice I could have ever made. See, unanswered prayers were by design within the long game, and perhaps in the short term an inconvenience, but God doesn’t play the short game.

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2 Timothy 4:7 “I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.” When you train for a marathon you learn to take your time, we learn to pace ourselves and see the bigger picture within our race. We always want so badly to finish the race and get the prize, but we don’t want to work to get there. On this long road we find ourselves on, do we get impatient when it comes to our prayers? I have been praying for the same thing for nearly 18 months now and my prayers have yet to be answered. I have asked why, and I have I fallen on my knees as tears fall from my face begging for my prayers to be answered and still I am met with silence.

Lord, I need you, BY: Matt Maher

Lord, I come, I confess
Bowing here I find my rest
Without You I fall apart
You’re the One that guides my heart

Lord, I need You, oh, I need You
Every hour I need You
My one defense, my righteousness
Oh God, how I need You

See the thing about prayer, and the thing about God is there’s a plan, and His plan isn’t always our plan, in fact his plan is never our plan. I have tried to remember on this lonely path of mine that sometimes we must learn to rest our minds and give it up to God. Prayer comes with one thing that’s so important and that’s faith. When we pray we are asking God to take care of said prayer. Whatever it is desired in our hearts that we take to God we must have Faith that those things are being taken care of, even if it’s not to our speed, or our liking. When we are hurting, or when we are lonely in our own time facing those valleys it can feel like an eternity. When we face our eternity the storm is terrifying, and we question how we can ever make it through. We question how we’re ever going to be strong enough to survive such a terrible storm. When you feel like you’ve lost your way, and you don’t know what to say, just remember that God gave us Christ, and in that we will always have hope. No matter the length of our prayers, the time we wait will not be for nothing.

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When you feel like you are in the storm and you feel broken, and lost, wandering around in the worst pain you’ve ever felt, remember that in our sorrows, we turn to the one place we can find truth, real answers, and we will be renewed in our strength.

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God of All My Days By: Casting Crowns

 I came to You with my heart in pieces
And found the God with healing in His hands
I turned to You, put everything behind me
And found the God who makes all things new
I looked to You, drowning in my questions
And found the God who holds all wisdom
And I trusted You and stepped out on the ocean
You caught my hand among the waves
‘Cause You’re the God of all my days

 Each step I take
You make a way
And I will give You all my praise
My seasons change, You stay the same
You’re the God of all my days

 I ran from You, I wandered in the shadows
And found a God who relentlessly pursues
I hid from You, haunted by my failure
And found the God whose grace still covers me
I fell on You when I was at my weakest
And found the God, the lifter of my head
And I’ve worshiped You
And felt You right beside me
You’re the reason that I sing
‘Cause You’re the God of all my days

 

Worship is hard sometimes when you hurt. The road is long, but the “juice is always worth the squeeze” when God is concerned. God will never leave nor will He forsake you. We cannot see the joys that are coming in our life, but when we walk with God our blessings will be endless. We long for things in our heart, and when the time is right for us, we will be granted those things if they are to lift us up. The Lord can give and take away anything. I know for me, I long for the love of another. I feel alone most of my days and I struggle to find the joy in the things around me. I have prayed till my tears would flow no more. I have prayed with everything I had and yet no answer. It’s not easy to quiet your mind and allow the world to happen all around you, and find yourself content. It’s not easy being bombarded with lies from the Devil telling you, you’re not good enough. Lies telling you that you’ll never be loved, never be wanted. The Devil tells you lies like you’re worthless, and helpless. The Devil tells you, you deserved the pain that was brought down upon you. When we are in our own pain, it’s hard to see the way out of that. Sometimes the pain we’re in lasts a long time. Sometimes the heartbreak we feel goes far beyond what we ever expected it would. The long game though, a journey of thistles and thorns, the trials of fire to forge you into something more. You must be broken down to be built up stronger as something else. When you don’t know how to stand, don’t, fall to your knees and pray. When you don’t know how to walk anymore, crawl. When you can’t see your way, stop and close your eyes. When you can’t move, learn to be still. When your world is upside down, learn to pray, learn to cry, learn to be exactly wherever you are. God will allow you to go through Hell to get to Heaven. You’re stronger then you know, because if you have God in your heart you can achieve greatness. You’re a child of the King and if that’s the truth, then you have the winning side in your corner. Have faith and keep your sight on the Golden Ring.

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My God,

You have seen it fit to allow me to walk this path alone on this earth. You have seen it fit to give me just what I need to keep moving forward. My God you have seen it fit to leave me alone with no companion. You’ve seen it fit to allow my body to fail me, and with no sign of reprieve I ask you my God to take me out of the shadows. My God I ask for you to remove this pain from my heart and show me the sun once more. I pray to you to take me out of this storm and give me rest. My God you are the God of all the hills and valleys and I pray to be laid beside the green meadows, and no longer in the valley. I have trusted you my Lord and as I still do I know that in all things you have the power and the will to change anything. My God I ask to help my friends who are suffering this night. I pray you give them rest, and peace where they need it. I pray to rise me up to the top of the mountain and give me the strength to stand, and run, free from the shadows that taunt me at night. I know I’m not alone even though I often feel like it. Protect me from the lies I hear in the dark. Protect me from the attacks I face day in and day out. I know my God someday I will move forward, and I know that even though I feel like I’m going backwards, and I know I’m not home yet. I know I have more to do, and I pray for the wisdom to see it through to the end. I pray to have the strength and wisdom of my brother Paul who was your beautiful Child, who ran the race, and taught and preached your word. I see so much, and I pray I see through your eyes. I know that today isn’t the end, and even though I feel tired, and I feel weak, I know that you will strengthen me to finish strong. Guide me through this storm, and allow me to continue to do the works you have me do. Allow this little Blog to grow and spread further into the world. Allow my struggles to be someone else’s strength. Give me guidance and if your will is to answer my prayers I understand it will be in your time. In all things I give thanks and I pray for peace and joy upon my friends and family. “I’ll live this life till this life won’t let me live here anymore.” (Big & Rich) Your will be done my Lord, my King, my Abba.

Amen.

 

 

 

 

WALK A MILE

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WALK A MILE

Don’t judge because you don’t know what someone’s been through. I’ve seen it a lot where people pass judgment on others, and even on me. I have lost many friends in my life because of one sad thing, judgment. Don’t we judge the homeless man? Don’t we judge the person with tattoos all over their body? Don’t we judge others based on what we see, or what we think? When we judge based on what we think, lest not we be judged. Matthew 7:1-3 ““Judge not, that you be not judged. 2 For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. 3 Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?” We don’t know what someone’s going through, and we don’t know how or why they are in their own situation that you are judging them. When we decide to leave someone because they are going through a hard time, think about how you would feel if you were in their shoes. If you spend a little while walking a mile in someone’s shoes, know that the truth is, you never know how you would respond, and yet you are so quick to condemn others when you have no idea how they feel, or what they are going through.

What It’s Like

We’ve all seen a man at the liquor store beggin’ for your change

The hair on his face is dirty, dread-locked, and full of mange

He asks a man for what he could spare, with shame in his eyes

“Get a job you f***** slob, ” is all he replies

God forbid you ever had to walk a mile in his shoes

‘Cause then you really might know what it’s like to sing the blues

We think we know, and we think we see the truth, but the fact is we really don’t. When experience is unique based on a lifetime of compound experiences, how dare us for thinking we have any right at all to judge anyone for the precarious predicament someone finds themselves in. That drunk outside the store, maybe he’s a Vietnam veteran, and maybe he has nightmares and flashbacks of being a soul survivor in an ambush in the jungle. Maybe he drinks to hide away from the pain. I’m not condoning drinking to hide from anything, nor am I condoning self medicating, but what would you do? If you had lived through something like that, how would you handle it? When you put a little perspective on why he’s in that situation it changes your response, or at least it should.

A while back, I was told by one of my best friends that I deserved my ex wife having an affair. I deserved her leaving and all of the horrible things she did to admittedly try to get me to hate her. When judgment was passed upon me, I fought back. See, I think one of the biggest things we sinners do is forget that when we are in pain, we often project that pain onto others. We don’t treat others in pain very well. We don’t place our selves before we decide guilt. We come to conclusions without the facts, and we condemn before we understand. We are blind and we often chose not to see. We don’t see truth; instead we make up our own truth. We decide that we have to be right because what else could it be? We never think beyond our own little box. We believe that anyone who doesn’t prescribe to our own thought processes must be wrong.

(God’s Not Dead 2 Spoilers)

In the movie God’s Not Dead 2, the pastor is removed as a juror in the trial because he needs surgery. In his place an alternate, a young girl with a skater look, piercings, and not at all someone you’d ‘think’ would swing to the defendants side. When the trial is over you see her walk by the defendant who was just found not guilty, and on the back of her neck a tattoo of a cross. She was the swing vote, and a voice for God. I’ve seen men with tattoo’s up and down their bodies preach the gospel louder then those who grew up in the church. I’ve seen men with sorted pasts, criminal pasts, who are the voice of the bible as they are firm believers. We just don’t know what someone’s going through. We don’t know what someone’s gone through in their past. We see with our own eyes, and we should try to see with God’s eyes.

Give Me Your Eyes, By: Brandon Heath

Step out on the busy street.
See a girl and our eyes meet.
Does her best to smile at me.
To hide what’s underneath.
There’s a man just to her right
Black suit and a bright red tie.
Too ashamed to tell his wife he’s out of work, he’s buyin time.
All those people going somewhere, why have I never cared.

 We see the world through sinners eyes and we are blind to the truth. We make up our own truth, and we sin when we pass judgment upon others. Are we so self righteous that we think we are the gold standard for good behavior? We have no business, or right to think our moral judgment stand above God’s. Everyone’s pain is different and unless we’ve lived someone’s life, we have no right to do anything but lift up, to help, to guide those we come in contact with. When we pass our own conclusions we become hypocrites. We become no better then the Pharisees Jesus spoke out against. We become no better then the one-sided news agencies we argue about. We become no better then crooked politicians and when we look upon someone with the contempt that comes with judgments we are looking at them with darkness in our heart. We do not show or share compassion like we should.

We all need to face a hard reality check. John 8:4-9 “4 they said to him, “Teacher, this woman has been caught in the act of adultery. 5 Now in the Law, Moses commanded us to stone such women. So what do you say?” 6 This they said to test him, that they might have some charge to bring against him. Jesus bent down and wrote with his finger on the ground. 7 And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 And once more he bent down and wrote on the ground. 9 But when they heard it, they went away one by one, beginning with the older ones, and Jesus was left alone with the woman standing before him.” Jesus is not condoning her actions, he is not condemning her either, he is looking upon her with compassion and forgiveness. He teaches us to not be so quick to condemn others for their mistakes, or their sins. Instead help those in need, guide those who sin, and be a light for them. “Go forth and sin no more.” He tells her. He shows her kindness and empathy. We must learn to love the sinner, hate the sin. We must learn to hold everyone in our hearts and spread the gospel.

If we spent as much time spreading the word of God to those around us, as we do looking upon others with contempt, imagine how many lives we could touch with the word of God. If we spent as much time in self-reflection as we spend criticizing others, we would have a far better walk with God. We need to take that gaze and turn it inward and then we will find we might not like what we see. Once the gaze is on ourselves we can better ourselves to have a far better walk with Jesus. The only judgment that will ever matter is that of the Lord, and that in which the Lord sees within us. If we are pure in heart, and faithful to the word of God we will find our actions will become pleasing. We should walk and talk in the reflection of Christ. We must learn that in all places, and to all people we are loving and compassionate. Do not seek conflict, and do not think you know what’s best for everyone. Find your faith that in all things God is working behind the scenes, and things will always work out to glorify our God. Before you judge be sure to walk that mile in someone else’s shoes. Then, you may understand what they are going through.

 

 

 

 

 

Blur of the Nights

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Blur of the Nights

The nights all seem the same, no change, and no growth, just the endless monotony that there seems to be no reprieve. How do we fight the darkness that builds when we star to fall into a state of depression? Sometimes the struggle is very real and in our struggles we can get lost in the blur of the night.

We pray and we hope that someday sometime the change will come. We don’t know when or how but we have to believe it’s coming. We need to rest our weary head on Gods shoulder and let Him take care of us. Let God wipe our tears and dry our face. Look into the eyes of the storm and brace for the worst. The rain comes and it goes and we may take some damage but we will make it through. Believe in yourself and know you’re stronger then you think you are. It is always darkest just before the dawn, so know that when all light seems lost, the Sun is just about to rise. Don’t loose sight of the Golden Ring and keep racing the race. Take it in stride and never quit. While you’re going through Hell, someone else might be going through the same hell and you’re on a collision course. Keep your chin up and reach, reach for the sky and keep going.

Matthew 5:3-14 3 “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. 5 “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth. 6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied. 7 “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy. 8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God. 9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons[a] of God. 10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 11 “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. 12 Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you. We are blessed, and we are often forgetting what we do have, and how it could be worse. While that in no way lessens or undermines the fight you’re in, we must try to find the blessings even if it’s just small stuff.

For me the nights blur together and I struggle to keep myself from falling into depression. The lack of social interaction outside of my four walls has been getting to me lately. Despite my efforts to go beyond the digital ‘friends’ I have by way of Internet, and my phone, I have not expanded my social circle at all. We must never give up, and when your days start to blur together, we should try and find ways to break up the monotony. Volunteer, travel, nature hikes, or just going to the movies on your own, we must be active to stay off depression. Don’t let it creep in and destroy you. Depression is so hard to fight and we don’t want to fight when it’s to late. Don’t give up on your day, but try to improve your lifestyle by finding things of interest you can easy achieve. Don’t be afraid to take chances to change your days. We never know what we can do, or achieve.

 

When the Struggles Comes

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When the Struggles Comes

Bad things happen to everyone, that’s a fact that is undeniable. The common saying is ‘why do bad things happen to good people?’ The fact is, no matter who you are, or how good of a person you are, no matter the good deeds you do, the lives you touch or save, you are not immune from the Devil, or the Devil’s impact or influence. Bad things happen because of Sin entering the world. People who sin affect those around them, and sin has a way of snowballing downhill. When the bad things happen there’s only a few ways to look at it, A: what did I do to bring this upon myself. If you were not the cause of the bad thing, then move onto B: What did someone else do around me to cause this? The final choice if neither A nor B is choice C: Usually medically related and we don’t have a good answer why babies get cancer, or why a mother dies early in life, we just don’t know the bigger plan or purpose. The simple fact is, we are always being bombarded by sin all around us, and at some point in our lives, just like the big earthquake, the big one will hit. What have you done to prepare for it, and how will you handle when it does?

Everyone has a story, and that story is unique and special. No matter what trials you’ve been through, what trauma’s, or even the joys and travels you’ve experienced, you are what your history has made you. No one person is less or more important. Everyone we encounter will have an effect on our lives, and everyone we encounter will have an equal affect. Though the effect we have changes with each person we meet, we need to realize not everyone will appreciate you, accept you, or even like you, but what really matter above all else, is that God accepts you. What can we learn from the experiences of others? I think we’ve become a society that shy’s away from embracing the suck. We shy away from our traumas because it hurts; it’s painful to think about, and sometimes even more so to talk about. What impact could we have on others if we shared our experiences instead of running away from them? I know for me reliving my trauma’s has never been a joy, and sometimes they keep me up at night. While I am still struggling to find my way, I realize that no matter how low I feel, I have to lift my worries, my concerns and my pain to the Lord.

We naturally shy away from things that make us uncomfortable, but I think the biggest tragedy is when we push people away who are the ones going through the tough time. There are instances I can understand when we walk away from someone, such as a person who takes and takes, who brings negativity by abuse or cruelty. Those kinds of people it can be unhealthy to keep them around. We never turn our backs on them, but we must also protect ourselves. The difference is when we push someone away who is legitimately going through a hard time in their life that isn’t of their own doing, or even if it is, someone who’s trying to make it right by actively trying to change their situation. When we cut contact or ties to rid ourselves of the negative vibe we are actively going against God’s command. Galatians 6:2 “2 Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” When we are in need, when we are enduring pain and suffering we should be able to turn to our brothers and sisters to be lifted up, to help us bare the weight of the cross we carry. Likewise we are told to bear those burdens, 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” A persons hardships are a blessing and when we survive the flame we will see the fruit that is made. When we realize there is always a bigger picture and when we can use our tragedies to lift up those who come after us, we will continue to spread the will and love of God.

We don’t want to be someone who always focuses on the negative, but we must understand that the negative does happen. We must learn to listen with the heart and embrace those who seek us to help carry their cross. Do we turn them away in their time of need? Do we lift them up with encouragement, or do we tear them down even further? Truth is truth and facts are facts, and we must learn to listen with open ears, and open hearts. We cannot push people away in need. We must respect the natural order of things and realize that hardships come to all. If your number hasn’t come up yet it will. Pain comes to all it’s just a matter of time. Who will be there for you when your number’s pulled?

When the struggle comes you will learn who your true friends are, and who’s a fair weather friend. You will find yourself struggling from time to time, but fear not, the Lord is always with you. Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” The Lord will never forsake us and even in the darkest of days, the fiercest of storms, we need to know and remember the God who created us and Loves us unconditionally. God who is always watching over us will always provide to us what we need, when we need it. God will also give to us the people who we can count on to be there for us. We may not see it sometimes, and we may not want to, but our will, our wish, or our own desires may not fall within the will of God. When we walk a different path from God we will often miss out on our blessings. Have faith and see the joys in the blessings we are given. Love and friendship are a rare thing sometimes. It’s so easy for us stupid humans to take that for granted. I know I have taken my blessings for granted and when they were taken away from me, it crushed me, nearly destroyed me, and rebuilding from nothing is far worse then realizing what’s there and embracing the joy of our beautiful gifts that come from our Abba (father). God will rebuild our lives when it crumbles, but we must remain faithful, and loyal to the word. Never give up hope for as long as you draw breath, as long as there is strength in your heart, hope is eternal. Tomorrow may be the change you were waiting for, and perhaps, if you’re lucky, that change may come today when you least expect it. Don’t let your pain rule over you. Don’t let your sorrow blind you from the truth in front of you. You’re not alone, not today, not tomorrow, not ever. Love will always find you.