Tag: negativity

Frustrations

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Frustrations,

We cannot walk through life without running into a few challenges. We cannot expect to never face the rain. Someone said to me once, ‘when it rains, some people feel the rain, others just get wet.’ I think one of the hardest things we will do as people is embrace the trials with an open mind and using that big beautiful brain God gave us to focus on the positive things even in the worst situations we find ourselves in. Galatians 6:9  “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Feelings of doubt and frustration are natural and normal to have. We all have our tough days, and I’ve had my fair share lately. What’s important is not that you have them, but that you are able to make your way through as a Christian, and keeping your witness. John 16:33“These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” The trials come, and come with a vengeance sometimes. It’s aright to feel frustrated, and even angry sometimes. It’s okay to vent as long as it’s controlled. Most importantly when you’re struggling make sure to take your concerns to the one who can truly do something, God.

As far as everyone else is concerned, when you see your brothers and sisters struggling be sure to help them. Be sure to provide encouragement, and love. It’s not easy going through trials. We all have, and we all hope to have someone to lean on when the going gets tough. Don’t be that friend that casts blame, or rebukes someone for being, ‘negative.’ One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone says you’re being too negative. Discussing trials, and struggles isn’t negative it’s a fact of life. Everyone goes through tough seasons, bad storms, and everyone deserves to have someone to listen, someone who will care, and help them through it. Don’t abandon those in need because if you do, you’re actually the one in sin. Proverbs 27:10“Do not forsake your own friend or your father’s friend, And do not go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity; Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother far away.” So many people today want only the feel good positives in their lives, and often try to remove anyone who is going through a tough time in fear they may be contaminated by negativity. The truth is, while some people are more prone to being negative and that may not be an undesirable trait, we must look at a person’s situation and ask how we’d feel in their shoes.

For me, I lost a lot of friends after my ex-wife left. I was miserable for a few months and struggled to stand on my own two feet. I was devastated at the loss of my wife, and the incident which put me in the hospital. I had guilt, shame, heartbreak, worry, and a slue of other emotions, and when I wasn’t ‘snapping out of it’ in others perceived time table, I was abandoned by many. My life at that time mirrored the life of Job. Many of my situations were similar, and as I continued to struggle and limp along, many of my pastor friends pointed me to the book of Job, and the trials of Paul. To this day many of my works would involve references of those two men as my inspiration to carry on. Just remember if you struggle as I have, or if you’ve struggled as Job had, and you find yourself alone, forgotten, remember these words. Job 19:14“My relatives have failed, And my intimate friends have forgotten me.” Even when Job was left and forgotten by his closest friends, rebuked, blamed for his misfortunes, he never gave up hope. Job 19:26“26 And after my skin is [a]destroyed, this I know, That in my flesh I shall see God,” He Trusted the Lord, and knew that God would never leave him. We must all trust in the Lord that in all things blessings can be found in every trial, every storm, every heartbreak, and every thorn.

 

When the Struggles Comes

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When the Struggles Comes

Bad things happen to everyone, that’s a fact that is undeniable. The common saying is ‘why do bad things happen to good people?’ The fact is, no matter who you are, or how good of a person you are, no matter the good deeds you do, the lives you touch or save, you are not immune from the Devil, or the Devil’s impact or influence. Bad things happen because of Sin entering the world. People who sin affect those around them, and sin has a way of snowballing downhill. When the bad things happen there’s only a few ways to look at it, A: what did I do to bring this upon myself. If you were not the cause of the bad thing, then move onto B: What did someone else do around me to cause this? The final choice if neither A nor B is choice C: Usually medically related and we don’t have a good answer why babies get cancer, or why a mother dies early in life, we just don’t know the bigger plan or purpose. The simple fact is, we are always being bombarded by sin all around us, and at some point in our lives, just like the big earthquake, the big one will hit. What have you done to prepare for it, and how will you handle when it does?

Everyone has a story, and that story is unique and special. No matter what trials you’ve been through, what trauma’s, or even the joys and travels you’ve experienced, you are what your history has made you. No one person is less or more important. Everyone we encounter will have an effect on our lives, and everyone we encounter will have an equal affect. Though the effect we have changes with each person we meet, we need to realize not everyone will appreciate you, accept you, or even like you, but what really matter above all else, is that God accepts you. What can we learn from the experiences of others? I think we’ve become a society that shy’s away from embracing the suck. We shy away from our traumas because it hurts; it’s painful to think about, and sometimes even more so to talk about. What impact could we have on others if we shared our experiences instead of running away from them? I know for me reliving my trauma’s has never been a joy, and sometimes they keep me up at night. While I am still struggling to find my way, I realize that no matter how low I feel, I have to lift my worries, my concerns and my pain to the Lord.

We naturally shy away from things that make us uncomfortable, but I think the biggest tragedy is when we push people away who are the ones going through the tough time. There are instances I can understand when we walk away from someone, such as a person who takes and takes, who brings negativity by abuse or cruelty. Those kinds of people it can be unhealthy to keep them around. We never turn our backs on them, but we must also protect ourselves. The difference is when we push someone away who is legitimately going through a hard time in their life that isn’t of their own doing, or even if it is, someone who’s trying to make it right by actively trying to change their situation. When we cut contact or ties to rid ourselves of the negative vibe we are actively going against God’s command. Galatians 6:2 “2 Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” When we are in need, when we are enduring pain and suffering we should be able to turn to our brothers and sisters to be lifted up, to help us bare the weight of the cross we carry. Likewise we are told to bear those burdens, 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” A persons hardships are a blessing and when we survive the flame we will see the fruit that is made. When we realize there is always a bigger picture and when we can use our tragedies to lift up those who come after us, we will continue to spread the will and love of God.

We don’t want to be someone who always focuses on the negative, but we must understand that the negative does happen. We must learn to listen with the heart and embrace those who seek us to help carry their cross. Do we turn them away in their time of need? Do we lift them up with encouragement, or do we tear them down even further? Truth is truth and facts are facts, and we must learn to listen with open ears, and open hearts. We cannot push people away in need. We must respect the natural order of things and realize that hardships come to all. If your number hasn’t come up yet it will. Pain comes to all it’s just a matter of time. Who will be there for you when your number’s pulled?

When the struggle comes you will learn who your true friends are, and who’s a fair weather friend. You will find yourself struggling from time to time, but fear not, the Lord is always with you. Matthew 11:28 “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” The Lord will never forsake us and even in the darkest of days, the fiercest of storms, we need to know and remember the God who created us and Loves us unconditionally. God who is always watching over us will always provide to us what we need, when we need it. God will also give to us the people who we can count on to be there for us. We may not see it sometimes, and we may not want to, but our will, our wish, or our own desires may not fall within the will of God. When we walk a different path from God we will often miss out on our blessings. Have faith and see the joys in the blessings we are given. Love and friendship are a rare thing sometimes. It’s so easy for us stupid humans to take that for granted. I know I have taken my blessings for granted and when they were taken away from me, it crushed me, nearly destroyed me, and rebuilding from nothing is far worse then realizing what’s there and embracing the joy of our beautiful gifts that come from our Abba (father). God will rebuild our lives when it crumbles, but we must remain faithful, and loyal to the word. Never give up hope for as long as you draw breath, as long as there is strength in your heart, hope is eternal. Tomorrow may be the change you were waiting for, and perhaps, if you’re lucky, that change may come today when you least expect it. Don’t let your pain rule over you. Don’t let your sorrow blind you from the truth in front of you. You’re not alone, not today, not tomorrow, not ever. Love will always find you.

 

 

Defeat

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Defeat

 In a war you won’t win every battle. You won’t have a successful run every day all year. When the world feels like it’s against you, when it feels like everyone you know is turning their backs on you, when your loved ones betray you, best friends leave you, just know that these things are temporary set backs. John 15:18 “If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before [it hated] you.” We all go through pain and suffering, we all feel low at times. Does the tree feel defeated in the winter when it looses its leaves, it looses its looks? No, the tree accepts the natural order of the seasons. There’s a season for love, a season for pain, a season for joy, and when the seasons for pain and suffering come around just know that like the spring rains, the spring warmth, the blossoms always come back, the leaves and the greens always defeat the gray.

Think of pain slipping away as rebirth. Each time we suffer, each time we feel defeated we are given the opportunity to go through our own rebirth. We have the chance to be who we want to be, fight for what we want. We can always redeem our situation. Redemption is only a course of action so why not take it?

Psalm 144:1-2 “Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle; he is my steadfast love and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield and he in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples[a] under me.” You can overcome this world and fly like an eagle because God will never leave you or abandon you.

In the last 12 months I’ve learned what pain feels like, I know what despair feels like and what I’ve learned going through all that is even in the fight to recovery you’ll have your bad days. It’s not a matter of having bad days; it’s how we handle it. The bigger question is if we let those bad days breed and spread. We cannot allow negativity to infect our lives like a virus. We must learn to focus our energy towards positivity, towards the grace of God, towards the wonderful gifts God has given us in our lives. If we ever question anything about our lives never questions God is with us. Hebrews 13:8 “Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and for ever.” No matter what the world does to you always follow 2 Corinthians 4:8 “8 We are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not driven to despair; 9 persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; 10 always carrying in the body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be manifested in our bodies.”

 Through it all the storm wages on and passes by, the pain will fade but the scars will always remain. Keep them as a reminder of the battles one, or even the mistakes you’ve made. Learn from them. Hebrews 10:35-36 “Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that when you have done the will of God you may receive what is promised.” God’s love will always surround us. God’s love is our security blanket to keep us warm, to keep us safe. This life is temporary, Gods glory, Gods promise is forever.