Tag: life

Would You Love Me If I Was Broken?

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Would You Love Me If I Was Broken?

A few days ago I was listening to a song by Matthew West called Broken Things. When I listened to this song I started to wonder why anyone would love me. I started to question my future relationships and question why anyone would want me with my baggage I carry. There’s a line in the song that stuck out to me,

“That it’s never the perfect; it’s always the ones with the scars that You use It’s the rebels and the prodigals; it’s the humble and the weak The misfit heroes You chose Tell me there’s hope for sinners like me”

 If my baggage is heavy then I need to learn to let it go. It’s not about the relationship with another person; it’s about the relationship with God. If you have pain, if you have scars, those are the people God uses the most. If God can use you because you let Him, then it’s only a small step to think you will be blessed for it. If you can use those scars and that bit of baggage to glorify the Father then someone out there will accept you baggage, scars, pain and all. The only truth that should remain is through God all things are possible. The God of peace and love loves us even when we are bent and broken. We can’t be expected to walk through the fire and not get burned. Walking in the life of Christ is burning away our old self and forging a new one. This process is painful and will leave scars, but the scars tell a story. That story is our testimony to how great God is.

You can meet 100 people and in those 100 people you may not find one person that sees you for you but only the pain you carry. We all have our burdens, but when the time is right God will give you someone to help you pick up that cross. God loves us no matter how bent or broken we are, and God will use you just as God uses horrible things for Good. The day of peace will come but not on this world. The world shall pass away and Heavens gates will open to those who followed. I think of dating and looking for that person to complete us like Thomas Edison’s comment on the first incandescent light bulb. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

While some people will see your scars and might get scared off because of them, someone, the right someone, will look at your scars and see how you’ve endured despite them. If you’re like the Heath Ledgers Joker and your scars made you absolutely crazy, then perhaps that’s a different topic for a different blog, but if your scars have built you up to be stronger in your faith, given you hope for the future, and taught you valuable lesions to help others around you, those are honorable traits. Even the broken deserve someone to love. Even when the world around you feels like it’s falling down God’s with you always and that’s the love that truly matters. When the time is right God will bless you with someone who would be willing to put in a little work to glue that cup together and will accept Christ above all else. Don’t give up hope, someone out there will love you and accept you even if you are a little rough around the edges. 1 Peter 4:19“Therefore let those who suffer according to God’s will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good.” 

“We want to avoid suffering, death, sin, ashes. But we live in a world crushed and broken and torn, a world God Himself visited to redeem. We receive his poured-out life, and being allowed the high privilege of suffering with Him, may then pour ourselves out for others.” ~ Elisabeth Elliot 
“Your most profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days – when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned, when your out of options, when the pain is great – and you turn to God alone.” ~ Rick Warren

 You may feel broken, but God loves you just the same. God loves us the scars and all. Have faith and know that God will bless you, for He blesses those who remain faithful. Your days of fire may not be over, just know that even in the fire God’s with you being burned along side you. That’s Love, that’s what our love for one another should be.

 

 

Feeding the Darkness

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Feeding the Darkness 

After a tragedy in your life you may find yourself on a perpetual lope, you’re on repeat playing the same tone over and over again. In that you are holding onto the pain and suffering caused by whatever trauma you’ve endured. What happens when we get stuck? Anger breeds upon itself. Proverbs 29:11 “Fools give full vent to their rage, but the wise bring calm in the end.” When we allow ourselves to stay angry we put ourselves inside a fortress and we don’t allow anyone to enter. When we do that we cut off our relationship with anyone who wants to love us to include friends, family, and most importantly God. Ephesians 4:26-27 “26 In your anger do not sin” : Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 and do not give the devil a foothold. 28 Anyone who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with their own hands, that they may have something to share with those in need. 29 Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.” This being a longer verse let’s talk about it. When we are angry we often find ourselves unable to make sound judgments. We open the door and everything we have is ripe for the taking when the Devil finds us in a state of suggestibility. The evil whispers in our ear to do things we usually wouldn’t do. I believe the general idea of these verses is telling us to turn that anger into something we can use. Redirect that anger and make good of it, allow ourselves to focus and help others. Build others up instead of tearing down in our anger. Find a way to let go of the bitterness, rage and anger that sit in the pit of our stomachs and spawn more negativity.

When we find ourselves getting angry which is a normal emotion, how we handle it is what’s important. Ecclesiastes 7:9 “9 Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.” We must learn to extend our fuse, make it harder to be provoked to do something harsh. The Devil wants us to fly off the handle because when we do we often hurt those closest to us. This damages the positive relationships we have and thus harming the relationships with God our Father.

 The phrase “Kill um with kindness.” Isn’t just a clever euphemism it’s actually a Biblically derived statement. Proverbs 15:1 “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” When others get angry if we find a way to maintain calm, it’s hard for the other person to keep shouting when instead of the reverberation affect, you act as a dampener. It takes two people in the ring to box. Without the opponent you just look silly shadow boxing yourself. Proverbs 15:8 “18 A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but the one who is patient calms a quarrel.”

 Be the calm in every storm. When we argue with one another and we start to yell, we start to curse, we start to dredge up the past, when we start resorting to name calling and all manner of vial things spew from your mouth, that is feeding the darkness. It’s not just focusing on your own pain, it’s also fueling others pain to grow as well. Often we argue with the ones we love the most and instead of allowing yourself to fall into a cycle of self loathing, self destruction, self gratification, allow yourself to see the error in your own way, and others will see the difference. We cannot change others, but by our own actions we may influence by allowing the Holy Spirit to guide us, to work through us and affect those around us. Anger is contagious, hatred is contagious, but so is love, so is kindness. It’s much harder to love and overcome things that make us upset or the things that hurt us, but we cannot be the judges of that. We cannot be judge, jury, and executioner because we aren’t qualified to do that. All we can do is love, pray, and be a positive influence on those around us. No one wants to be around the Big Green Guy all the time. They want to be around Bruce Banner instead, the mild mannered scientist whose got a good heart. Be the person with the good heart that everyone can see. Don’t let the disease spread through you and your life, learn to let it go. Forgive and Love. Those are the keys to living a happy life.

 

 

 

The Right Place At The Right Time

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The Right Place At The Right Time

This morning I woke up a little before my alarm and decided to get out of bed instead of snoozing a little longer. I got ready and left 20 minutes earlier than normal. I wasn’t more then 10 minutes from the house when I saw headlights in front of me flashing at me. I could see debris in the road and that’s when I saw the car upside down. I pulled over as soon as I could, grabbed my duty belt and ran to the car. The woman who flagged me down was on the phone with 911. I had my flashlight and I started to search for the driver, but they weren’t in the car anymore. I franticly searched the surrounding area and that’s when I saw a man lying on his back in the grass. He was bleeding from him nose, mouth, and several other places of exposed skin. At the time he looked as stable as he could be so I knew not to touch him or move him. You could see he was breathing so that was a good sign. As I realized the 911 dispatcher could get a name using the plate I asked the woman to let me talk to 911. I gave the plate number and that’s when I saw it, in the backseat under the crushed metal of the SUV an infant car seat. My heart fell to the floor as I choked out what I saw to the dispatcher. I handed the phone back to the woman and began looking for a possible infant somewhere in the huge field the car crashed in to.

After a little while of searching the field I returned to the man and found his breathing had changed. He became erratic and it almost sounded like a bit of gurgling coming from his chest. It wouldn’t surprise me if he broke a rib and deflated a lung in the impact. The car from what it looked like impacted about 100 feet away or so against the fence and the embankment and flipped, eventually hitting the fence again in another spot, and flipped once or twice more before impacting the tree where the vehicle settled on it’s roof. The man was roughly 20 feet or so from the vehicle, surprisingly still breathing. The woman and I could hear the sirens now and as the deputy was the first on scene I flagged him down. Within a minute later the ambulance arrived. I left my flashlight on the fence providing light for them to work. As he started to move around a bit, I held is head in place and waited for the paramedics to get all the trauma gear they needed. When they arrived they took over and I went to help the deputies search the field more for the possible injured child.

After 45 minutes on scene the man was long gone as cleanup started. The woman and I waited for the State Troopers to arrive, which sadly didn’t happen before I decided to leave and come to work. I know I was in the right place at the right time, I know that all the mud on my pants and boots tell a story. I know that God placed me right where I needed to be and when. Today I had Gods eyes to see what I needed to, and his Heart so I had the compassion to stop. I had my duty belt with me and I had the gloves, flashlight, everything I needed for the day. God wants us to listen to that little voice in our heads to do something. I left for work 20 minutes earlier than I usually do and now I realize why. Are we listening to the Holy Spirit in our lives? Are we going where we are driven to, listening to that little voice inside us to allow ourselves to be used for the good of Gods will? Galatians 5:25 “If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.” We must listen for the voice, listen for the word. Psalm 25:4-5 “Make me know Your ways, O LORD; Teach me Your paths. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, For You are the God of my salvation; For You I wait all the day.” Our souls can catch the fire, the fire rises in us and we are consumed by the Holy Spirit, and we know we are walking with God.

We never know why something happens the way it does, but we know that in all things God’s working for our good even if we can’t see it. Praise God in the greatness of the day, and the sorrowful of the night for we are never alone.

The Grass Ain’t Greener

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The Grass Ain’t Greener      

Recently as some of you who read my blogs have already figured out I suffered a horrible separation. Because of that this topic’s been weighing on my mind. Often when we look across the yard and things look pretty good. We look at other peoples lives, we look at what others have, we look to other people and we often think how good they have it, or how great it would be to own that, or even how good it would be to be with someone else. We usually call this the grass is greener phase. The thing about this phase is, it’s a lie. The Devil has been perpetrating this lie since the original day of sin. The day in the garden Satan convinced Eve that life would be better after eating from the tree of knowledge. He convinced her that living a life with open eyes would be better then that which God had created for them. The Devil made it sound like the grass was greener on the other side. The sad part was once Eve stepped over to the other side and realized how wrong she was the damage was done and it couldn’t be fixed. The fall from grace had happened and now the beautiful grass she once had died, and she could never have that life back again.

When we pursue the greener grass we are looking through a distorted keyhole lens that only shows us what we want to see, not what we need to see. How often do we hear the stories about people crossing over to the other side just to find out it’s not great at all, and they wish they could go back. The sad part is when you cross over and then in doing so you destroy not only your life but also others around you. Recently in my life I knew a couple that had been together for about 10 years or so. The father had gone through a horrible divorce because his first wife had an affair and destroyed the marriage. After a while of healing he met a new woman who’d become his second wife. They would have a great life, a great house, their children became a family, and at least from the spectator point of view their life looked pretty good. OF course there are things we never see from the outside, but I know I was a bit envious of everything they had. I found out rather suddenly that she had an affair, lied about it, continued the affair, and it quickly fell apart. She destroyed her own career, she broke the hearts of the kids, broke her husbands heart and as he suffered this kind of loss now for the second time his pain now unimaginable. I’ve not talked to her since then but the question is ‘was it worth it?’ Though I’ll never have the answer I have to imagine at some point the rose goggles will be removed and the beauty will turn to ash.

In my own life I have suffered something very similar. Two wives, two affairs, and as with the first time, the second time has left me broken and displaced. This time around my faith is guiding me. This time around I am stronger than I was before. This time I know I have more to offer. I heard a saying once a few years ago, “The grass is greener where you water it.” Marriage isn’t easy sometimes, and sin pulls at our hearts and all manner of earthly desires but when you get married it’s for life, it’s not for as long as it’s convenient. The idea of sin in the marriage such as divorce is repugnant to God. The old saying is you can look but don’t touch apparently is more of a guideline these days. Even looking can be a pitfall if it becomes envy or lust. There are so many people out there who have spouses who became cheaters, so many relationships fail because of infidelity. God’s heart breaks watching so many relationships crumble because of such things. Genesis 2: 21:22 “So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh.22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made[h] into a woman and brought her to the man.” Woman was made to be of one flesh. Woman was made so man wouldn’t be alone, and vise versa. When two people marry they become one flesh. They are devoted and when there is infidelity the heartbreak that’s caused can be deeper then some can handle. I wish we could have the eyes of God to see what God see’s within the hearts of those broken by infidelity, by lies, by deceits. I wish those who do such evil things knew how it feels to be on the receiving end. I wish I knew or understood the minds and hearts of those who do this to others. I wish that we could receive Gods love for humanity. I wish we loved as God loves.

Much like the man from my story earlier I feel the pain he feels, I have seen through his eyes, and I know the pain of the knife, the pain of betrayal, the sting of lies. Was the grass greener, I may never know, but I know my future looks bright. For every tragedy we face in our lives there is a potential for great redemption. In every tragedy God is working to use it for the betterment of our lives. No matter how much pain we face, no matter how much sorrow or anger that’s in our hearts letting go of that poison and finding a new pasture to raise your home is the first step. Forgiveness and letting go of that anger and hate, saying it a thousand times over, letting yourself weep and feel, ‘I forgive you.’ You must learn to believe in the goodness of people. You must learn that each person you encounter is not the last. Holding onto anger and holding onto hatred are chains for your very soul that leave you stuck in the place that, that wound first happened and you can’t break free till you face the pain head on. You must fight the urge to stay angry, you must fight the urge to hate. We are not the judge and we are not the jury. Deuteronomy 32:35 “To me belongeth vengeance, and recompence; their foot shall slide in due time: for the day of their calamity is at hand, and the things that shall come upon them make haste.” We are not to hold onto the cancer that holds us back.

When our worlds fall down because of someone else and it looks like our grass is dying, and we feel we’ll never be whole again remember that tears of healing may fall and will water your grass. Let them flow, let the healing begin and watch as God uses the miraculous to change your life. Every day you must learn to take care of your own yard, tend to your garden, tend to your flock and watch as the healing waters sprout new life into your life and sooner than you think your grass will be green and full of life. The glory of our lives and our calamities all belong to the grace of God. God sees the pain, feels the pain, and endures the pain. God was with Jesus on that Cross, and as we fight to bare our own cross Christ our Lord, one with the Father Abba is with us on our cross. The whips that strike us strike God. The words that cut our hearts cut the heart of God. Nothing we go through in this life affects only us. As I have grown a great deal I have found that the wounds I’ve endured over these last 8 months are not mine alone, and I wouldn’t be standing if it weren’t for God. I myself broke Gods heart 8 months ago, and I have to pray and ask for that forgiveness. I asked God to forgive me as I was dying in that ambulance and hearing the voice of God “You’re forgiven” I woke and new life was breathed into my chest. The only grass that’s greener in our lives we won’t find here. It’s only when we go home, when we finally reach our place in paradise will the grass ever be greener. Don’t loose sight of the promise made and remember God’s promise to us is not empty, it’s full of truth and life.

When the world tries to lure you away from your own piece of grass, when you are being tempted to cross over that fence, remember not only will your grass die where you were, there will be no blessing on the land where you are headed. Have faith that if you are on the fence and you are thinking of crossing over because you feel life would be better on the other side, think of Matthew 4:29-31 “He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.” 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?” Much like Peter we must trust in the Lord will not let us be consumed by the storm. When you are struggling in your relationship there’s always a better way. Fight for your relationship, fight with everything you’ve got and trust in the Lord to save you when times are darkest.

 

 

 

 

 

Broken Sky

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Broken Sky

The pain inside caused by you shattered like a mirror to the floor all around.

God protect me so I can put the peaces back together.

God give me your eyes so I can see the reasons why.

The tears that fall, fall like bricks to the ground. The flood all around now from tears I’ve spent.

Why would you do this I scream, why oh why I cry.

Nothing’s all right, nothings okay, I’m fine I say, but the lie that lies.

I’m broken hearted and I feel fractured inside, torn to which way to go.

A second chance, a third and forth, but nothing helps.

God tells me I’m more than what I feel. Tears drench my shirt, my desk, my everything.

I’m not who I once was, I am afraid, and I don’t know what else to do.

God hurts too, or so the Bible tells me so.

God am I being punished for my mistakes, is this only path?

God says no, no punishment, free will makes the heart break.

We are more than the mistakes we make. We are remade in the light, washed by the waters.

God stay with me tonight, God hold me tonight, Abba I need you today. I’m broken.

God my pain is deep and I feel like I’ll never be whole again. Abba save me from my sorrow.

God my God please save me tonight. Help me fight what I feel, help me feel today I can be saved.

God please bless me, please don’t make me wait. God my God help me, I need to feel you here.

God my God I know that I’ll be stronger in the end.

God my Abba please stand with me in this fire, please help me not feel the pain as the fire burns away the old.

God my God please help my heart, please hold me tonight. God my God don’t forsake me tonight.

What don’t kill ya makes ya stronger I know, but I can’t do it alone. My God my God don’t let me fall tonight.

The Hard Love I feel, the pain inside, fractured and broken, I am shattered in the mirror on the ground.

God my God, my Father, please piece me back together better than I was before.

My God my God please allow me to be rid of the rocky road, protect me from the Devil, please I beg of thee.

Safe Journey

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Safe Journey

A close friend of my, my Pastor left on a trip to Europe, and this just after two terrorist attacks in Europe, the UK to be specific. This reminded me of the story so often played out in the Bible, the New Testament to be exact. Luke 4: 28-30 “All the people in the synagogue were furious when they heard this. They got up, drove him out of the town, and took him to the brow of the hill on which the town was built, in order to throw him off the cliff. But he walked right through the crowd and went on his way.” Jesus knew when it was time to go, and time to stay. Jesus was well aware of his surroundings, and we could learn a thing or two.

No matter where we go, or what we’re doing we know that God is always with us, so the scripture says. If the journey is long and dangerous which it is, then it looks like Jesus is the muscle, our bodyguard, our protector. Matthew 6:25 “Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; not yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more then meat, and the than rainment? This verse goes on to say all things will be provided to the faithful, and worrying about the day or tomorrow doesn’t actually give you any more ability or power to change the outcome. You can worry about being taller all day long, but that doesn’t mean you will get taller. Psalm 23:4 The Valley of the Shadow Of Death, yet peace and comfort come.

I’ve traveled a lot of places in my 33 years on this world. I have had good and bad travels. The closest I ever came to death or at least as it appeared from where I was standing, or better put nearly falling, was returning to Camp Junction City in Ar-Ramadi from my R&R in Qatar. We were in a C-130 headed for Baghdad. There was a sandstorm while we were supposed to land so we circled for a while. At some point the decision was made to send us back to Qatar, but we needed something first, fuel. The mid air refuel wouldn’t take too long once the plane arrived with two F-16 escorts. The sandstorm was getting pretty bad from what we were told. Just after the fueling process was over we started to turn to make our way back to Qatar. When the F-16’s broke off to head back to where they came from apparently one of them suffered severe engine failure and began to crash. The pilot ejected and was later recovered unharmed. As for us we returned to the bright and sunny island where I’d spend another week before a second transport attempt. On the second trip to Baghdad we were carrying a slew of gym equipment. This time when we reached the City we circled because there was a good bit of firefights around the area we were supposed to land. We’d been circling for a bit when we decided to stand and walk around the plane. Without warning the plane banked hard to the starboard side. My feet went out from under me and I reached up to grab the piece of equipment that I was hopping was safely secured to the deck plate. One of the guys wasn’t so lucky and he hit the bench and the wall of the plane. He screamed he was all right though so not to worry. We leveled off and the pilot told us to get back to the seats and hold on tight. We started to nose dive and the pit of your stomach flew straight into your throat. We leveled out again and without any notice the landing gear dropped and seconds later we were back on Iraqi soil. Once we landed we received word the reason for the drastic and violent course changes was because we were taking fire. The pilot told us it was small arms fire but still following procedure, no one was seriously injured. Our trip came to an abrupt end, but it ended safely.

We realize that in our walk with Christ we aren’t always going to be safe. We realize that sometimes that safety is only an illusion, because in Christianity we may be called to go places where it’s not safe, where being a Christian is still punishable by death. We don’t have to worry about that here in the United States, however, what we have might be far worse for our walk with Christ. We have the world. The world as we know it is corrupt and evil. The world tries to get us, it tries to get us to sin in all different kinds of ways. The world wants us to fail, and the attack on our souls in the US might be worse than the attacks on our bodies in some of the other countries. We have our ways to protect ourselves but only if we carry it with us in our hearts, that’s the word and Holy Spirit of God. When we go out into the world to proclaim the name of Christ we need to keep our wits about us. We must be careful because the Devil slithers around seeking for his next target.

Each and every one of us in on our own journey, our own path, running our own race and at every step of that race there can be an obstacle for us to face. The race is not a sprint, but a marathon for us that will take endurance and patience. 2 Timothy 4:7 “I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith.” How will you finish your journey, will it be strong, pushing yourself, or will you fall and give up on yourself? God won’t give up on you, so you shouldn’t. You’re stronger then you think you are, and if our God is for us, who then can be against us?

A Past Long Forgotten, The Dangers of Compartmentalization

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A Past Long Forgotten, The Dangers of Compartmentalization

I’m sure most people have had at least one trauma in their life that sticks with them, if not more than one. If you’re like me, the Devil just loves to stick around and try to make life a tad harder than it needs to be. One thing I’ve noticed is the minute changes that come about after every trauma takes place. When you’ve become so consumed with the trauma that you are forced to find anyway you can handle it, a common way for kids to handle, or at least myself was compartmentalization. When it comes to trauma big and small this is a safe way to handle it in the moment. However, if not revisited this method of handling can be very dangerous. Websters defines compartmentalized as “to separate into isolated compartments or categories” In many cases this is the event, and the emotion surrounding the event and are stored inside the brain as separate memory engrames. Once the memory is separated it’s difficult to reconnect the two, and it’s more so when the laps of time is greater. So what happens when you do this throughout a lifetime, say, 30 years? Lets think of memories as boxes, now think about each box as a memory, but the painful ones divide into two boxes and sit them on the shelf in the closet. Over time that closet is going to start to get full. When the closet reaches a certain point, all it takes is one massive event, and everything in that closet can come bursting down on top of you burying you in all the negative feelings you tried so hard to subdue or hide. So now you are lying on the floor, you have boxes everywhere, the emotions are like a zoo full of escaped wild animals, how do you plan on wrangling them up, and putting them back? The truth is, you don’t. The time at this point has past and now a new way of storing them is needed.

Often times when the emotions from traumas are released in such an uncontrolled manner the outcome is less than desirable. The effects can be quite frankly catastrophic. Often we see this as the beginning to self-destruction. An individual can go through several possible outcomes to include, self harm, harming others, drugs or substance abuse, addictions of other kinds such as work, gambling, adrenalin seekers, or other forms of risky behaviors. This is the common way for someone who’s accidently had Pandora’s box opened who didn’t have the right guidance to handle it. People don’t usually ask for the box to be pried open, sadly, it’s just one of life’s unfortunate circumstances. The key, once it’s opened is to know what to expect, and hopefully have someone around who can help guide you through the path of recovery. There are 4 basic paths to dealing with trauma. They can be found and studied here.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200111/recovering-trauma

The example that best correlates with compartmentalization is the Tsunamis. During the time you have lived on by not feeling, as it’s described in the Psychology Today article your nervous system is a circuit bored and in the event of a catastrophic traumatic event your system shuts down. There’s a dangerous time frame here between the event, and the waters receding. It’s in that short period of time that some will fall into the self-harm stage. It happens so fast that spectators rarely realize there’s a problem until it’s too late.

The truth is, as a Christian nation it needs to be better about standing with our brothers and sisters in times of great struggle. It’s sometimes hard to do especially when we don’t always know or understand the nature of what’s going on underneath the water. Some people, myself included often look like a duck on a pond. Floating around, no cares in the world, however if you look under the water, those little flipper feet are going a mile a minute. The iceburg is much larger underneath than what we see on the surface. Since we never know someone’s breaking point we must assume that during events that are hard to handle we look at them objectively and try to remain unbiased. A few life changing events that some would seem as bad things but not traumas are what we will look at for a moment. Loosing your job, loosing a spouse to either death or an unwanted divorce, loosing a loved one, car accidents, and sometimes slightly worse events. These things to some people may seem horrible, but to others, they can be the straw to break the camels back. As that may often be the case it’s better to error on the side of caution and overly loving in the hopes there are no residual feelings that could move this into a catastrophic event.

The dangers of being wrong: What if your friend or spouse goes through one of these events and notices you aren’t there for them, or you downplay how they are feeling. If we don’t show them that we care, and if we pass a negative judgment on their situation we may actually be contributing to the further decline of their mental stability. It’s important to always try and be supportive. We all handle situations and stress differently based on the culmination of our backgrounds and what we’ve learned in the past. If you are a young man and you get harassed every day by the police, eventually you will grow to fear them, hate them, avoid them, even though they are only there to help, the behavior is a learned trait. If you are bullied your whole life and you grow up and have self-esteem issues, self loathing, fear of rejection, or abandonment, those fears, those traits are learned traits. They come from a lifetime of experiences that tells us how the world is, even if it’s only our version of the truth. Getting back to the point, when bad things happen, we don’t honestly know how someone will react. That’s why it’s so important to follow Galatians 6:2 “Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.” We shouldn’t hesitate to help even with the small stuff. Show compassion and be there if someone needs you. Ephesians 4:32 “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” We’ve been given such grace and love and forgiveness by God we are asked to pass that along to our fellow brothers and sisters of humanity. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.”

If you’re struggling through tough times, if you have old trauma’s that are weighing you down, or if you just feel you need to talk, seek out Godly and or professional advice. Don’t try to get through this life on your own. There’s no shame in asking for help. Not asking for help is prideful, arrogant, and perhaps even a hair selfish. By not dealing with the issue when it’s small, it can grow inside you like a cancer, spreading throughout your thoughts and feelings, until one day it’s beyond repair. Seek help, trust in the Lord that you will be watched over no matter how light, or heavy the storm is.

Where In The World Is God?

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Where In The World Is God?

Some of you, perhaps dating my age a bit, are familiar with the books, game and show, “Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego”. The idea of the game was as a new gumshoe you had to follow the clues around the world to locate the master thief Carmen Sandiego. This took both skill and mindfullness to track down this master theif all over the world. You had to know your stuff. The show was designed for the ages of 10-14. So, if you’re up to it where going to answer the question, where in the world is God?

Alright gumshoe listen up. God is somewhere out there and He’s waiting for you. Your mission is to follow the clues and find God before the time runs out. I hope you’re ready for this because if you loose it could be your eternal soul.

Your whole life you can live and not have the answer to one of the few great questions of all time. The first and most important question, “Is there a God?” The short answer is of course there is. The hard part is trying to prove it. We of course can get into a full-fledged apologetics debate, a full-fledged theology debate, but the fact remains it is the opinion of this Blog that God not only lives, but also loves us and never leaves our side.

Do you remember when you were a kid and you’d wait all year to send your letter to Santa Claus? Do you remember when Christmas morning arrived and all the presents were under the tree? How the mind of a child works, the faith that something or someone is real without ever having any kind of tangible truth. Children play together of different races, ethnicities, sexes, and mange to get along just fine without the help of us adults. Where does that love and wonder go as they get older? The world is a dangerous place for not only your body, but also for your mind and your soul. The world will tell you to question what you’ve learned, tell you to unlearn, tell you to broden your mind, and to close your mind. The world wants to shape you in it’s image. It wants to teach you and unteach you at the same time. If you have a particular mindset the world will tell you it’s wrong, and will try to force you to change, sometimes by force. Where is God in all of this?

God knowing how the world would treat His children came up with a plan. The plan was to love us, guide us, diciplin us, and give us a tool to live by. The Bible says many things about the world, and the lust of the flesh and the lust of the world itself. We love violence, we thrive on debauchery. The things that make us feel good are also the things that are the biggest lies. Morpheus “The Matrix is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it when you look out your window or when you turn on your television. You can feel it when you go to work… when you go to church… when you pay your taxes. It is the world that has been pulled over your eyes to blind you from the truth.” God is always with us. God surrounds us, and comforts us when we are in need, when we ask for Him. We know there is so much wrong with the world, but do we ever truly understand why? The world is a fallen world, one of Sin, and that sin is what causes broken homes, war, poverty, hatred, crime, and loss. The feeling that something is wrong is no different than knowing something was wrong in the Matrix. Morpheus: “What you know you can’t explain, but you feel it. You’ve felt it your entire life, that there’s something wrong with the world. You don’t know what it is, but it’s there, like a splinter in your mind, driving you mad.” The world is divided up into two categories, those saved, and those unsaved. Those who are unsaved are not the enemy, but they will try to sued you from your faith. The Devil will use anyone He can throw into your path to pull you away from Christ. In that, if the ‘system’ is the world, and the saved are those unplugged then you can see how if there was one being looking over all the world God would be everywhere, all at once. Morpheus: “The Matrix is a system, Neo. That system is our enemy. But when you’re inside, you look around, what do you see? Businessmen, teachers, lawyers, carpenters. The very minds of the people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that system and that makes them our enemy. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready to be unplugged. And many of them are so inured, so hopelessly dependent on the system, that they will fight to protect it.”

The argument that if there were a loving God that there would be no pain which is false. I say without hardships you never find your true potential. I believe that without reward there is no purpose to try. If there is nothing after this life and we just end, then why obey mans laws? Without some form of higher moral code, then the code of man is worthless. Why not just take what you want, do what you want, and enjoy the fruits of all your evil wicked ways. If there is nothing to hold us accountable then why do anything at all. God didn’t create slaves, He created humans to have a relationship with us, and with that gave us free will, and thus not making us slaves to his will. We have the choice to follow or not. We can see in the world the battle of good and evil everywhere we turn. Every time we see good, every time we see empathy, we know that God is alive and with us and on the move. We see the world through tinted glasses and we but only follow Christ and we can see a bit more clearly. When we see the transformation in those people who become saved the difference is astounding. There is a noticeable difference in the human condition. We have seen miracles in this world even if they are few and far between. If we examine the actual evidence and set aside any preconceived notions we may hold, the evidence is fairly conclusive. Some skeptics will argue forever, and some of the leading scientists will argue the contrary that humanity is a random convergence and nothing more. The existence of Christ is not in question. There is enough evidence to prove he lived, the question then is was he the Son of God? When you break down what we know of examining cold cases such as the well-known Cold Case investigator J. Warner Wallace we find that the eyewitness accounts of Jesus’ resurrection and His prior miracles are not likely to be a fabrication. First and foremost that many people who lived and died vowing that Christ rose from the dead is unlikely that a group that size would be able to keep a conspiracy alive that long. Each of them died horribly and under extreme stresses and knowing they were going to die if they didn’t recant their statements died for the truth.

Further more those who claim the Bible contradicts itself because the authors don’t seem to mention the exact same things in their accounts as the others just don’t understand the nature of eye-witness accounts. This too is something you would see from different witness perspectives. Don’t believe me, that’s fine, read a book. The point is, God is everywhere. God is always with us, and we only need to ask and God will save us. The bills been paid and all we have to do is believe and follow. It’s not always the easiest of things to do, but it certainly beats the alternative of being tortured nearly to death by the most brutal means imaginable, and then forced to drag a piece of wood a mile or so to your own place of death, then while bleeding, while thirsty, while exhausted being nailed hands and feet to a thick wooden cross, lifted up and as your body starts to pull down with your arms spread you begin to asphyxiate. You will either die from blood loss or asphyxiating, and if that doesn’t happen before your set time, they break your legs so you can no longer hold your own weight, and you die shortly thereafter. This doesn’t sound like a fun experience to me. If what suffering I’ll go through in this life is to build my character and suffer even just a little as Christ suffered, then I’d gladly take my end over Christ’s. John 5:24 “Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life.” The sacrifice was paid for us. We will never have deserved it, but we have it never the less. Matthew 24:11-13 “11 And many false prophets shall rise, and shall deceive many. 12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold. 13 But he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.” There will be many false prophets you will encounter in the world of men. They will get you to walk away from what you really want. They will get you to buy into their schemes like used car salesman’s using misdirection, flashy terms, sweet talking, and when all else fails, bold face lies.

Remember that God is everywhere and the love is endless. Don’t give up hope, and never give up the faith. Remember those still plugged in are part of the system and that system is designed to keep you a slave. The Devil wants to keep you plugged in, draining the life from you, growing stronger the more souls he steals from the Lord. The end of the war is foretold, what side do you want to be on?

 

The Smallest Gestures

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The Smallest Gestures

Walking through the mall minding my own business I was aware of my surroundings. I could see the looks on people’s faces to get to where they had to go, to shop their little hearts out. Christmas was coming and everyone was focused on the task at had. Me on the other hand I was focused on making sure they stayed safe. I was hyper stimulated to remain vigilant. Nothing was going to happen in my mall as long as I had a say in it. I could see the child in front of me as I walked up on the family. The mother smiled as I approached. Her child stepped out in front of me and put her arms wide open. I knelt down and allowed her to hug me. “Thank you for keeping us safe.” The little girl said. I hugged her back and said it was my pleasure. I told her Merry Christmas. I looked up at the mother who said thank you. She grabbed the little girls hand and went along their way. I carried on my day, a little brighter then I had before. A small gesture of kindness from a small person reminded me you don’t have to be big or do big things to make an impact.

The small gestures or acts of kindness are fleeting from our society, or at least that’s the way it looks from this bloggers perspective. If you hold the door for someone, how many people will thank you for it? Now this is a tough test because some cities have a more hospitable nature then others. The other day I was at church. I was standing there during the invitation (it’s a Baptist church) and as I looked up my best friend and associate pastor was walking towards me. He put his arm around me and began to pray for me. At first I didn’t question it I just listened to his prayer for me. This was highly unusual, but the thought and sentiment behind it nearly took my breath away. I was trying to hold back tears. What a wonderful sign of affection. Husbands that bring home flowers, or the wife that make breakfast in bed. The notes that loved ones share in each other’s lunch boxes, all these things are the smallest gestures that can go a long way.

These days as there is so much hate in the world, now after two terrorist attacks in the UK in these many weeks, Love it seems is more important than ever. Luke 12:7 “Why, even the hairs on your head are all numbered. Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.” When you think about this verse and find that the author is saying one single hair on your head is so valuable it’s worth more then several birds. If God finds our presence that valuable then so shall it be. If the big things we do in the name of Christ is that important imagine that all of the smallest acts of kindness and love are also important. A smile, a hug, a phone call, or even just a message to tell a friend you are thinking of them and care. These small things can mean the world to someone in need. Believe that if everyone was so busy with their life to do these small things very little would actually get done. “The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest intention.” Oscar Wilde The slightest gesture of love may go a long way to provide hope that otherwise wasn’t there. We don’t need to wear capes to be a hero. We don’t have to fight off an entire army, or cure a rampant plague, in the words of Christopher Reeve, “I think a hero is an ordinary individual who finds strength to persevere and endure in spite of overwhelming obstacles.” Every day we are able to look beyond ourselves. Every day that we think to lift up those around us by even the smallest acts of kindness we could be a hero to them. What may seem small to us may be huge to them. We can’t judge what is going on inside of someone else. Asking to pray for someone in time of need, giving a firm hug, or even just a text to say hello may be enough. “One thing I’ve learnt about humans: you can’t judge their strengths by the size of their actions, but by the devotion of an act, no matter how small.” Dianna Hardy

 Last year I was in the hospital for a few weeks. Just a couple days after getting admitted I woke to someone coming in and telling me I had visitors. I expected it to be someone from the church but the truth was 10 of my friends, brothers and sisters, colleagues from the military from all over the country where standing around my bed side. The overwhelming feelings of joy, sadness, shame, guilt, but above all hope, kept coming and coming. I was loved and I was being shown it. I was being shown how my friends thought of me, and what they would do to make sure I was okay. My faith and hope in people was renewed that day. I was lifted up and shown the goodness that can still be in others. Since then I have found the smallest of gestures make a big impact on me. Those impacts resonate now at a much higher level then they used to. There are two quotes that I’m reminded of. “Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, and honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.” Leo Buscaglia. The last is “There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it.” Edith Wharton.

It’s not hard to let someone cut in, in traffic. It’s not hard to hold the elevator or the door. It’s not hard to tell someone they look nice. It doesn’t take much time to send an uplifting text to a friend you haven’t heard from in a while. In this day in time we have so many ways to communicate, and do nice things why do we let slip the opportunities to show Gods grace to all. 1 John 3:18 “Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.”

In the Bible there are countless stories about small random acts of kindness that led to huge events. Rebekah watered a strangers camel’s and ended up being the mother of Jacob entering the lineage of Christ. Ester’s kindness to the King, which ended up playing a roll in saving her people, and David’s act of taking his brothers food to the front lines, this is where he fights Goliath. These small things, almost insignificant at first glance wouldn’t have made most people stop and think, but put them in the right place to make huge impacts on the lives of those around them. What little things can you do day to day that can make drastic change? You certainly won’t know until you start, and let history decide the rest.

Behind The Eyes

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Behind The Eyes

The eyes as they say are the windows to the soul. We tell others our favorite things are peoples eyes, the beauty in the differences, the unique, the colors, the softness, or hardness as they are shaped by the chapters we face and overcome albeit good or bad. Do we ever look deep enough to see the pain hidden deep down in someone’s soul? Do we ever learn to look beyond our own pain and suffering to see it in others? The cold suffering hidden behind the eyes, one of fear, one of hopelessness, do we see it and ignore it? Behind the eyes is the doorway to discover someone’s joy, someone’s fears, or the sorrow. I recently had someone tell me I looked so happy in a photo I took. I was surprised to say the least. I took the photo because that’s what I do, I send selfies to the people I’m talking to. It makes the conversation a little less faceless. In the photo however I felt horrible. I felt miserable, and I had to force the smile from the stiff upper lip I’ve been supporting for months. The pain didn’t show through, or did it, and the untrained eye didn’t see it in my eyes?

Matthew 6:22-23 “The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light. 23 But if thine eye be evil, thy whole body shall be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in thee be darkness, how great is that darkness!” In my own photo I realized it was the untrained eye that didn’t see it, or didn’t want to see it. We move along in our lives and we have either gotten so good at hiding how we feel, the pain were going through, or we’ve gotten so skilled at only focusing on ourselves we just can’t get beyond our own self. God sees all the pain in the entire world. Imagine that for a moment that you can see, you can feel all the suffering of the world. If you had even a hint of empathy could you imagine your heart breaking?

We couldn’t imagine the burdens people are carrying. We can’t ever fathom the pain raging deep inside someone’s heart. The only truth is those burdens for many are nearly more then they can carry alone. When we truly learn to see those in danger should we not reach down and find the empathy that we has as a society lost, yes, yes we should. Jesus never turned someone away who was in need, no one who was suffering. He provided hope and love, and empathy for those in need. We need to learn to open our eyes and our hearts to see the world, to see that we can touch a single soul by our kindness and generosity of love.

Give Me Your Eyes, Brandon Heath

Give me your eyes for just one second
Give me your eyes so I can see,
Everything that I keep missing,
Give your love for humanity.
Give me your arms for the broken-hearted
The ones that are far beyond my reach.
Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten.
Give me Your eyes so I can see.

Save My Life, Sidewalk Prophets

If you looked me right in the eye
Would see the pain deep inside
Would you take the time to

Tell me what I need to hear
Tell me that I’m not forgotten
Show me there’s a God
Who can be more than all I’ve ever wanted
‘Cause right now I need a little hope
I need to know that I’m not alone
Maybe God is calling you tonight
To tell me something
That might save my life

 We can never know how important we are to someone else. Every encounter even small can have a lasting impression. The song Save My Life by the Sidewalk Prophets touches on this. Would we take just a little longer to talk to someone at the store, or at our job, or even in our own church? If you knew that those fleeting moments could be the difference between life and death for someone, would that change your perspective? Just about everyone I think would say they would spend a little more time if they, or had they known. I’m a firm believer that suicide just doesn’t happen in a split second. The person in pain has been in pain for a while and perhaps had very few people to lean on or trust with their pain. Look deep inside someone and embrace every chance we get with people. You never know, you might just save a life and not even know it.

We all need Christ in our lives. We unfortunately don’t have Christ physically with us, but if we need hope, if we need the love we have something powerful, we have the Holy Spirit. Christ told the disciples to go forth and baptize all the nations. If we are walking in the shadow of Christ we have the power to make that change. We can save a life by just showing a little love. We can save a life by just extending a hand in friendship. If we spread the love of Christ to the world we can touch millions. If Christians actually wept for those in need, if Christians actually saw and felt for those in pain and tried to help heal the pain as Christ had, how many lives could we affect change to, the implications would be more then any of us could fathom. “I want a second glace, so give me a second chance, to see the way you see the people all alone.” We only get one chance sometimes to make a difference. If we look at every opportunity as a chance to change the world we can because we have the Holy Spirit with us. The world is in such chaos and turmoil we can bring a little hope back to it. God has blessed us with boundless love and hope. Why we don’t spread that love to others is beyond me. Is it uncomfortable sure, but Jesus was well versed in making people uncomfortable. Jesus led his people his friends, his disciples into Samaria and then once there sent them out on their own. God uses the weak and the broken as his warriors. They say that when you are hurting you can heal if you pour yourself into helping others who are hurting just like you. Everyone’s a sinner just like you and me, everyone’s going through something and God put you in their life for a reason. If we consider every life we encounter isn’t an accident, but by design, how we act towards them could be life altering. Open your heart to see the good you can do.

Lord give me the sight to see the pain behind others eyes.

Lord give me the strength to get beyond my own pain.

Lord give me what I need to touch the lives of those around me.

Lord give me the courage to step out of the boat and out of my comfort zone.

Lord give me the eyes to see. Give me the love you’ve held onto me.