Tag: learning

Got the Blues

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Got the Blues

Psalm 42:9-11“I say to God, my rock: “Why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourningbecause of the oppression of the enemy?” 10 As with a deadly wound in my bones, my adversaries taunt me, while they say to me all the day long, “Where is your God?” 11 Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.”

 Have you ever been stuck and you don’t know where to go? Have no fear for God has a plan. Even David a man after Gods own heart felt deep depression and he was King of a nation. He had wealth, power, women, friends, and yet depression still taunted him like a splinter. We will have feelings come and go. Depression is often from a chemical imbalance, not a lack of faith. There are ways to combat depression and it starts in the word. We must study the word but we must practice what we hear and learn. If we hear but not do, it’s meaningless. James 1:22-24 “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. 23 For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. 24 For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like.” We must always pray but do. We cannot sit and just expect something to change. This isn’t to be confused with having patience. Patience is a state of mind, moving carefully, strategically. Isaiah 26:3-4“You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. 4 Trust in the Lord forever, or the Lord God is an everlasting rock.” We must have peace in our minds, and put our faith and trust in all things in the Lord. If we start saying things like, “this problems to small for God to worry about.” Or “This problems to big, God can’t help me with this.” We don’t understand God.

Depression can come for anyone of us. It’s a silent assassin that attacks from the darkness in our minds. It’s destroyed homes, families, friendships, and is completely indiscriminant. Attacking your mood, your body, your joy, it leaves destruction in its wake. The devastation of depression is very real and very tangible. When bad things happen because of your depression, it can pile more negativity and often makes matters worse. Let me tell you though, there is hope and it’s your for the taking.

The first thing to do is seek medical attention. The mind is as fragile as any bone and when a trauma happens it’s important to do the same triage as any other injury. We all suffer from pain and doubts. We all have insecurities, but where there is pain, there is also hope. Never forget the saving power of Christ. Never forget where true peace comes from. Jesus Christ is the rock in which we build our foundation.

Remember the Lord is with you, in that foxhole. When the war comes to your front door the Lord forever stand by your side. Deuteronomy 31:8“8 It is the Lord who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed.” When your heart cries to the Lord, do not feel abandoned if your prayers aren’t answered as fast as you’d like. In God’s time and in God’s way He will give you what you need. Not necessarily what you want. Psalm 34:17“When the righteous cry for help, the Lord hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.”

 I think one big thing we do when we’ve got the blues is push everyone away. We say no one knows us, or understands our pain. We push away and we stay in the anguish. We must learn to use every resource God gives us because it’s a gift from God. God created people to understand the mind, who understands how to fix cars, who understands the human heart, and thus gives us people we need to get better. At the top of all things we need is Jesus Christ. We are nothing without Christ, and we cannot truly find what we seek without Him. We can try, but we will always fail. We will find temporary fixes, solutions, but they are worldly and thus will eventually fail us. Find peace in the Lord and watch as He gives us exactly what we need. Just because it seems like all the odds are against you, and just because it doesn’t seem like there’s anyway to win the battle, never stop fighting. With God on our side even when it’s 1000 to 1, we have the sovereign of the universe on our side, so never give up.

Freedom Hymm, By: Austin French

I push, I pull

Go back and forth finding myself pounding on a locked door

I try to make it out alone without your help

But I know I’ll never win this war

I can never be, never be, free without you

I can never be, never be, me without you

This is the sound of chains breaking

This is the beat of a heart changing

This is a song of a soul forgiven

This is my freedom hymn

This is my freedom hymn, my freedom hymn

This is my freedom hymn, my freedom hymn

I breathe the air of freedom in knowing my life

Is better off in Your hands

The past is gone, what’s done is done

Now I’m alive

And I’m never gonna look back

I can never be, never be, free without you

I can never be, never be, me without you

 

 

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Baby Don’t Hurt Me No More

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Baby Don’t Hurt Me No More

Hebrews 11:1-3“Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. 2 For by it the people of old received their commendation. 3 By faith we understand that the universe was created by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible.” We walk by faith because our eyes deceive us. We walk by faith because sometimes we have nothing else. When the world is tops turby and we cannot see, we must trust in the Lord to deliver us. Wherever God has us go we must trust our divine purpose. More then trust the where, is the why. It’s hard, and we often cry out in pain, and we beg it to stop, but in the words of Captain James T. Kirk. “I need my pain!” (The Final Frontier) 

Pain comes to all who walk this Earth. Pain is an inevitablility that we don’t like to think about, but it’s an undeniable reality. Since the fall of Eden in Genesis 3: 19b“till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken: for you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”And further Genesis 3:24“24 He drove out the man, and at the east of the garden of Eden he placed the cherubim and a flaming sword that turned every way to guard the way to the tree of life.”God said we would suffer for food for what we have we must forever work hard, Genesis 3:6-7.It wasn’t just sin that entered the world with the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge, it was also evil. Now it must be understood that evil existed prior to the fall from Eden. This is seen in the conversation between Satan and Eve. Sin is the gateway to evil in many ways. It’s largely in our own pain comes. When selfish desire out weighs love, people get hurt. When we no longer take into account how our actions affect others, people close to us can get hurt.

In my personal life I have often asked Abba to deliver me from my pain. I have gone to Him in prayer, and begged for absolution. I have often wondered how long I would be made to wait. How I could get to where I needed to be, so I could walk on the right path? I’ve come to realize perhaps my path is to wait. Perhaps what I desire most hasn’t come into my life yet because whomever it is may not be ready in their walk. Realizing this, and trying to look at the bigger picture of life as a Chess game, I realize that in order to mount an attack, or even a defense, pieces need to be moved to the right place, and that doesn’t happen all at once. So I now sit, more patient in my self, and more trusting of the greatness that is God’s plan. Waiting is always the worst and hardest part, especially for those personality types that feel they have to be moving, doing things in order to get what they want.

Being hurt in a relationship is hard. When it seems a love has been destroyed by lust and lies and others sins, it’s impossible not to feel pain. I have a secret for you. Pain can be managed and will diminish in time. When we put our faith in God and trust a path, we can begin to heal. Forgiveness is a big part of healing, but also a major roll in relationships. Without forgiveness, scores are kept, and when arguments ensue that thing you forgot to do 6 years ago is now being used as a weapon. When we feel wounded or trapped we as humans like to lash out with insults designed to cut the deepest. If you don’t want to hurt anymore, I’m sorry to say there’s no quick fix. I recently knew someone that was going through a divorce. They thought they were ready to move forward, and I was sure to ask multiple times if they were ready for that, and every time was a yes. Sadly when the time came and they were connecting with someone they met, the cold feet, fear, and doubt crept in. they bowed out abruptly, and sadly leaving hurt feelings behind.

We may not be able to avoid pain from others all the time, not if we want to actively engage in human relationships. We can however be more careful with whom we get close to. When living in sing actively, it’s like playing hot potato with a grenade. It’s going to go off and anyone in the area will be affected. Ownership of the grenade doesn’t matter anymore because it affects everyone around. Much of our anguish is brought on by our own decisions. When I worked security at a local mall I often saw teenage girls crying in the office waiting for local law enforcement. They were caught shop lifting and now they were going to face those consequences. If you don’t want the pain and embarrassment perhaps doing sinful things isn’t for you.

Our paths change with every decision we make. Our choices are the rudder of our ship. When we sin in a big way we are thrown off course in a big way, but it’s because we threw the wheel knocking ourselves off course. If someone else sins it’s like being hit by a wave. Of course the bigger their sinful choice the bigger the wave. No matter the impact we are still captain of our own ships. We choose how we live our lives by the decisions we make. How we deal with the storms when the come, is still on us, and how well we manage our own ship. While a storm may damage your ship, Jesus says to ‘not to be afraid, for the Lord is with you.’ Do not doubt but be courageous in your walk. Trust in the Lord to lead you wherever you are meant to be. You may travel to the ends of the Earth and fight mighty battles, but god is with you. Do not get stuck in the pain. Instead learn to forgive and keep marching on. Do not grow weary in your grief instead turn that into motivation. Embrace the pain because you must face it to deal with it. One day the pain of this world will end and the day Jesus calls you home. Genesis 15:1“After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision: “Fear not, Abram, I am your shield; your reward shall be very great.” Let God be your shield, your protection, your rock, your foundation.

 

 

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Setbacks

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Setbacks

“Make a plan, execute the plan, expect the plan to go off the rails, throw away the plan”(Captain Cold)The path we follow and the plans we lay, one brick at a time on that yellow brick road, can only go so far so long as God wants us to follow that path. I don’t know what to say exactly except Captain Cold was a wise, wise man. I have laid the foundation to walk and expecting I knew my plan, but God had other plans. While I can’t say I understand, because Lord knows I don’t, I now have to throw away the old plan, and begin the research for a new one. I can’t say with any level of honesty I’m not hurt by recent events. Although that new job started off rough, it was just starting to smooth out, and I was excited for the prospects that by the end of the year I’d be able to follow through with my home buying goals. Now, I must figure out a new plan, and hope I am able to remain positive.

I’m not trying to make excuses but I find this kind of set back frustrating. Largely I am annoyed because I just can’t seem to go 10 feet without being knocked back 6. I have given my all to the Lord, and I am preaching and teaching every chance I get. I’m not engaging in reckless behaviors. I’m going to church regularly, and yet I just can’t seem to get to a point where I am in the life I have always dreamt of. I know that God has a plan for me, and my faith tells me to be strong, but the personality type doesn’t do well without closure, without answers. I am a logical planner and I need to know the why when something fails because without the why I don’t know what it is I’m to learn. I have struggled in the past with my faith and trusting in the Lord to lead me out of the struggle. I’ve never stopped believing in God, but I won’t lie, God and me haven’t always seen eye to eye. Obviously I have never won any arguments. I feel a little like Bruce trying to figure out why I keep rolling snake eyes, getting the worst of the luck, and having plan after plan fail in front of me. The future is as blurry to me now as it ever has been. All I can do now is dry my eyes, tighten my boots, and get ready to start a new trek.

Isaiah 35:8“A highway will be there, a roadway, And it will be called the Highway of Holiness The unclean will not travel on it, But it will be for him who walks that way, And fools will not wander on it.” Even though I wander, and I don’t know my path, I trust in my God. That does not take away the pain, but it means I can keep going. I feel like anyone else, and I have my questions, and sometimes I question God, but He’s always understanding. 2 Corinthians 5:7“7 for we walk by faith, not by sight.”  Though I don’t know my direction I walk strong and tall. I’ve got pain by my Lord heals my wounds. I walk in the darkness and I cannot see my way, but I feel the warmth of Jesus as the light guides my way. I don’t know where I am, and I don’t know where I’m going, but I know my way home. My savior promised a paradise waiting for me one day. I believe I am saved in the blood of Christ, and I know that no matter where my steps take me, one day I’ll reach that golden finish line. Isaiah 43:2 “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they will not overflow you When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, Nor will the flame burn you.”

Today I don’t feel strong. Today I don’t feel courageous, so my God give me faith. My God give me courage. My God show me the way so I may walk without fear. My God today I feel alone, and today I am lost, so my God my God please stay with me tonight. I feel broken, and I don’t know where to turn. I have walked through the valley, and I have pain coming from every direction, and I feel as if the whole world is standing against me today. My God you protect me when I face my battles. My God your love is pure light, and my God I need faith to trust in you tonight. I feel the storm it’s all around. I know you have the power to calm the waters, to be fear for the storm, and you could make it all go away. My God can you stay with me, I will lift my hands, I will praise you, I will worship you. Tonight I’m on my knees and my tears flow to the ground, and I need you with me today.

If you feel like me, and the world is just heavy, take a moment to step back and pray. Every day we need to remember that attacks will come and if not towards us, then those whom we care for. We must remain vigilant and keep the word in our hearts. The world is designed to break us, to tear us down, and pull us away from Christ.  “Why do we fall? So we can learn to pick ourselves up.”  (Alfred, Batman Begins)We will have setbacks in our life, and we will fall. We will encounter struggles we never imagined, and we will face a world we don’t recognize. Our true strength doesn’t come from our own determination, but from the Lord above. Our true purpose is to Love our God and to do the works God would have us do. “Whatever you do, remember that. You’re going to make a difference. A lot of times it won’t be huge, it won’t be visible even. But it will matter just the same. Don’t do it for praise or money, that’s what I want to tell you. Do it because it needs to be done. Do it to make your world better.” (Ed Brubaker, Gotham Central, Book One: In the Line of Duty) Every day you wake is a new day to get out there an make a difference. Quitting is letting the Devil win, so keep pushing, keep moving, keep fighting, and don’t ever doubt who’s in your corner.

Beauty with Thorns

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Beauty with Thorns

One thing I’ve seen in my day, but especially in the last two years is sometimes the prettiest of faces has the darkest of hearts. There are so many average to below average ‘beautiful’ people in this world because true beauty lies beneath the surface. As society has grown we’ve become consumed with self image. We’ve become a nation, a race of shallow, self absorbed, egotists, that cares more about looks and self, then anything else.

The rose is considered by many to be the most beautiful flower on the planet. In fact the rose is the flower of love. As beautiful as it is, it can also be dangerous. While on the surface a rose is beautiful and a rose bush is magnificent but if you look further down beneath the surface a substantial about of razor sharp thorns. If you were to fall into a rose bush you would undoubtedly come up with a plethora of cuts. Just because something looks beautiful on the surface doesn’t mean it doesn’t have thorns.

As an average looking man trying to find a serious relationship, I have encountered obstacles I never would have dreamt of. As the venue for meeting people still ranks highest through mutual parties, that is largely based on your own number of friends. The second way most often used sounds like it should be easy to meet people, but there in lies the pitfall. Friends must have friends who are single. Friends must also be plentiful and if either of those isn’t the case, using relationships may be difficult. Social online dating apps highlight one thing in particular, your photo. Sadly that means the decision to go forward starts with a physical attraction. In order to get to the meat of the profile a decision is made based on the cover of the book. We are in a swipe left or right generation and guys like me get passed over. It’s getting harder and harder as the clock ticks by to stand by and feel helpless to change anything. This period of my life has tested my endurance, but not of my faith in God, but my hope to a brighter future. This has tested my own self-confidence, and I can say with certainty my self-esteem has been damaged in these two years.

We know that faith in all things belonging to the Lord takes endurance. The true test comes in times like these when we are made to wait. The trial continues and perhaps one day, hopefully soon, the tide will turn and instead of endurance, a message of praise and celebration will cross this page. Hope remains as the trust in Jesus is strong. Constant prayer and study have kept my course true. Though I tire, the love of Jesus renews my faith. Stay strong and lean on the Lord when you are tired.

People will judge you before getting to know you because that’s what people do. First impressions are important because you can never go back and try again. Sometimes you can redeem a first impression, but rarely. It’s important to know that your impression as a Christian is at the utmost importance. We must be beautiful people in Christ and we must allow our actions to speak for themselves. 1 Peter 4:4“Of course, your former friends are surprised when you no longer plunge into the flood of wild and destructive things they do. So they slander you.” Don’t let people of your past force you to change who you are. You may not be the most attractive person, but don’t allow peoples negative opinions force you into situations that would not be becoming of a Christian. We may want to compensate for average looks by trying to find other ways to please the Lord. I present you a caution of changing and how far you take that change. Galatians 1:10 “Am I saying this now to win the approval of people or God? Am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be Christ’s servant.” As far as other people are concerned. John 7:24“Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment.” We should never be most concerned with the looks of something, but the inside of their heart. While yes attraction matters, do not let that consume you. Our society has placed so much emphasis on what beauty is, and it has changed our thought perception along the way.

We are warned in scripture about judging by the clothes people wear, or how they look. Even though the warnings are so clear, we fail to live up to scripture, and I would go as far to say we are sinners in our judgments. 1 Samuel 16:7“But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” The Lord looks into our hearts and sees the wickedness that rests within. The Lord knows every dark or evil thought we’ve ever had. We must do better at how we treat others, and how we represent ourselves. Looks aren’t everything, and sadly, it’s hard to overcome the world, but we must try.

James 2:1-5“My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory. For if a man wearing a gold ring and fine clothing comes into your assembly, and a poor man in shabby clothing also comes in, and if you pay attention to the one who wears the fine clothing and say, “You sit here in a good place,” while you say to the poor man, “You stand over there,” or, “Sit down at my feet,” have you not then made distinctions among yourselves and become judges with evil thoughts? Listen, my beloved brothers, has not God chosen those who are poor in the world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom, which he has promised to those who love him?”Good things come in all shapes and sizes but is it good, or just look good? Be careful of the golden goose that may bring misery and not fortune. 2 Peter 2:1“But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction.”

 

We are but Servants of the King

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We are but Servants of the King

When on the cross the ignorant cruelty of man was obvious on Skull Mountain. Many scoffed at the messiah hanging on that cross. Jesus, bloody, flesh torn, blood soaked eyes, and yet we see not a man afraid to die, not a man angry, but a loving, forgiving savior. Luke 23:39-43“39 One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him,[a] saying, “Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!” 40 But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? 41 And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” 42 And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” 43 And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in paradise.” Jesus showed love and compassion. The nature of God is love for his children. God is a jealous God and wants our love, but what parent doesn’t. If you were a parent or are a parent could you ever choose which child had to die? God sacrificed a part of himself to save us. We were the ones who screwed up, but despite the reason, God loved us to take on the punishment, the cost of separating from paradise.

Jesus gave his last breath as a man giving up his life, his soul freely given to the Lord above. Jesus forgave us absolving us the punishment of eternal damnation. Though we don’t actually live our live free of repercussions of our sinful actions, we are forgiven if we seek repentance.

Jesus speaks of the fulfillment of prophesy, Luke 24:45-49“Then he opened their minds to understand the Scriptures, 46 and said to them, “Thus it is written, that the Christ should suffer and on the third day rise from the dead, 47 and that repentance for[a] the forgiveness of sins should be proclaimed in his name to all nations, beginning from Jerusalem. 48 You are witnesses of these things. 49 And behold, I am sending the promise of my Father upon you. But stay in the city until you are clothed with power from on high.” Why do we struggle so much in our lives to give up our earthly desires? We have been given so much, yet we don’t act or behave in a grateful manner. Christ lived his life as a servant. He taught us to live a life of love, of grace, of mercy, but always to be humble. We should always ask ourselves, if what we do brings glory to God.

Even in the darkest of our days we can always find a way to use that in our walk with Christ. We must humble ourselves to the Lord. In all things our God is with us. One day the frost fades and the first bud of new life blossoms. The gray skies split as God announces its time to live again. Hope springs anew and God bestows blessings upon me. Of course God knows the plan and we are to small to understand. My God, my God you are big and I am not and I raise my hands to you. My God thank you for my gift and I have you to praise. You’re perfect timing my Lord, and forgive me for my doubts, forgive me for my weakness. Thank you my God, for without you I am nothing.

When we submit ourselves to the Lord and we pray we must understand not all prayers are answered. We must keep the faith and remain humble. Psalm 37:5-7“Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. 6 He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. 7 Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!” Rejoice in the prosperity of others, while some will obtain it by God, others by the Devil, the righteous will be blessed, while the wicked will one day find punishment. Trust that true prosperity comes from our Heavenly Father. Trust he will never push us down the wrong road. Hebrews 12:1-2“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, 2 looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.”

 1 Samuel 2:3“Talk no more so very proudly, let not arrogance come from your mouth, for the Lord is a God of knowledge, and by him actions are weighed.” We must not be to proud of our actions for if not for God we would have nothing. Proverbs 21:4“Haughty eyes and a proud heart, the lampof the wicked, are sin.” Do not be distracted from who we are in the Lord. We are nothing without God because this life means nothing except to offer the opportunity of eternal paradise. Because we are promised eternity we must remain loving followers of Christ. Do not fear tomorrow. Be glad for it and humble yourself in our service to the Lord. Never allow the Devil to harden your heart or break your spirits. We may be servants but we to are royalty, we are royal heirs to Heaven. We are allowed in the kingdom and we will forever rejoice, singing praises to our King.

 

Giving Yourself Away

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Giving Yourself Away

It starts of small, just once, just a little bit, and that’s when it takes hold. We give up one small piece of our principles, and then another, and before long the black and white becomes gray. The fall doesn’t always happen quickly, sometimes it’s a slow moving enemy that creeps along scrapping at your heart a little at a time.

We often stand on our principles determined not to give in to temptations of this fallen world. We see the fall happening all around us. We see public figures from government to Hollywood getting caught with their principles around their ankles. We see politicians accepting bribes, actors turning to drugs and more and more sex candles rock the new like never before. We have watched as our nation endures the slow fade in what is now accepted on this earth and ignoring the once proud biblical principles we once stood strong on.

We face temptations and the first time we tell ourselves ‘It’s okay, just this once.” We have taken the step into the quicksand. Sin can be described many different ways. Sometimes a major event can alter perceptions, but I like to think those circumstances are more rare. I think sin is more like boiling a frog. The water is cool when the frog is dropped in so the frog doesn’t notice anything is wrong. As the water heats (as sing grows and spreads) by the time the frog realizes anything is wrong it’s too late, the damage is done. (We find ourselves buried under the mound of sin.)

So many marriages that end due to affairs you see the near identical timelines. “It started off very innocent and we were just friends.” The slow draw of sinful lust can creep in untamed yet slowly as to not draw attention to the danger ahead. Most affairs could be snuffed out with a single choice to walk away. The little steps that make the right and wrong to an ambivalence for those their actions may affect. The truth is sin attacks at each of our hearts differently. The choices we made “there’s a price to be paid, people never crumble in a day.”(Slow Fade, Third Day)

I’ve lived with a broken heart twice as I’ve seen thoughts betray a promise made but not kept. I’ve watched the life I had crumble away. The heart was betrayed, lied to by desire, fooled by lust, and choices made destroyed so much more then a home. I’ve seen drugs take hold of people’s lives with the lies and promises that the substance make them feel better. But eventually the affects of the drugs wear off and more is needed. Then more, and before you know it you’re chasing one high to the next unable and unwilling to handle life. What seemed benign at first slowly turned to tear down the walls of everything you held most dear.

Do now allow the darkness to grab hold. Don’t allow yourself to fall victim to the thoughts that pull you away from Christ. Once down the dark path though hope is never lost, you don’t want the veiled promises. You can’t trust the lies, the whispers from the Devil. The price paid for the retched path is high. “The bill comes due, always.” (Dr. Strange) We don’t need to face those horrible consequences if we stay on the path laid out by Christ. Turn away form lies, and turn away from adultery. Stay away from hate, and don’t give into the fear. We must learn to praise God in the sun, or the rain. We must pray joy, peace, love, but if there’s a storm we must we must pray that no matter where we find ourselves we do it all for the glory of God.

God shines down from heaven today, and no matter what your situation is on this day, raise your hands to the sky, praise Jesus for the life we have. Find hope that the storm will settle, or the meadow is peaceful. Wherever the road takes you today, trust and praise Jesus. While you draw breath there is always hope. Never give up hope on God for the calm waters might be just around the river bend.

Run Barry, Run

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Run Barry, Run

Pain is always going to be apart of life. I was asked recently why bad things happen to good people. I took a moment to contemplate an answer. Eventually I said, “We learn more from our hardships and failures then we do when life is smooth sailing. We cannot truly reach our potential unless we are put to the test.” As most of my readers know I am a super hero graphic novel fan. One thing I like about my favorite heroes is most come through horrible tragedies and rise above. During Flashpoint Paradox Barry Allen runs back in time to save his mother from being murdered. Without living through his tragedy he never grew up to be a hero. Peter parker wouldn’t be Spiderman had it not been for him loosing his parents and Uncle Ben. Bruce Wayne wouldn’t be Batman without loosing his Parents. Most heroes rise above and grow to reach their full and true potential through tragedies.

I have often used the sword metaphor for facing trials and tribulations. In order to make a sword, steel must go through fire. It must undergo a rigorous process of heat and pounding, over and over to remove the imperfections and to make the sword ready to withstand battle. What happens if the sword is not properly tempered? What happens if the sword is taken into battle early? The sword is a soldiers weapon, they rely on it to withstand the rigors of battle. If not properly prepared the sword could break when it’s most needed. When we are forced with grief or tragedy it’s just as important because if we do not face grief or tragedy it can come back to haunt us when it’s least convenient. I recently saw and episode of the Flash where Leonard Snart, AKA Captain Cold told Barry Allen, “You can’t outrun grief.”This actually hit me hard. I’ve always struggled with loss. In my life I’ve always said I was to busy to grieve or deal with the horrible traumas I faced. The problem was eventually my grief caught up to me, but all at once. I thought if I ran long enough I could leave the past behind me. Sadly I couldn’t have been more wrong. “If you don’t confront your feelings, your feelings will confront you.”(Leonard Snart)

Psalm 34:18“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” The beautiful thing about the God on high is it’s something we can count on. If we’re high on life, or down in the deepest pit of despair, Jesus is right with us. We cannot fathom the love God has for us. When we hurt, God hurts but when we are broken, God begins to mend us. Psalm 147:3 “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.” When we struggle with the natural progression of our life, all we can do is know that Jesus will be there with us. Our body crumbles and ages, but tomorrow God’s still there waiting on us. Psalm 73:26 “My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.” If we have Jesus the pains we feel will diminish over time. Trusting in the Lord and having faith in his glory and trust in the plan, we can begin to heal, if we face our hardships.

Isaiah 53:4-6 “Surely he has borne our griefs and carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted 5 But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed. 6 All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.” When we look at what Jesus did for us, and we think of our grief, can we take ourselves out of our own pain, and realize we aren’t the only ones going through pain. Jesus endured enormous amounts of pain and we think we are good and we don’t deserve it. John14:1“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God;[a] believe also in me.” If we truly believe in the Lord, then while grief is a natural part of life, it shouldn’t destroy us. When bad, horrible things happen, yes, we all have emotions, and we need to deal with them, face them in a healthy way. Those emotions are given to us for a reason and we have to trust that. But pushing them away like they don’t’ exist, and pretending that everything’s okay when surly it’s not, it’s just a recipe for disaster. In closing I will leave you with this, Joshua 1:9 “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” This is a command, not a suggestion, not a piece of advice, this is from God himself telling us not to give into fear, not to be dismayed by the trials we will face, but to pick ourselves up and carry on. We are told our strength comes from the Lord and the faithful can move a mountain. Death and grief aren’t always tragedies, but even when they are, trust in God’s purpose and have faith that the end of suffering and trials is over, and hopefully they are in a better place. Trust in the Lord and face your struggles head on so one day they don’t knock you to the ground and pound you into the pavement.

 

 

Hello, Is Anyone There?

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Hello, Is Anyone There?

What do we want, what we really, really want? We want attention. We want to feel accepted, and to feel wanted. We want to feel like we are important, and yet in our lives, how often do we make anyone feel important to us? We want to know God’s listening to us, and that God loves us, but how often do you give anything back? How often do you make your decisions based on what would bring glory to God?

When things don’t go your way do you throw a tantrum like a little child? Do you stomp your proverbial feet, and huff and puff? I’m sure at some point we all have. It’s easy to be distracted by life and take our focus away from God. It’s easy to wonder when we will get our blessings, and we expect to be rewarded for a job well done. Even in my own career when I don’t receive adulation I become frustrated and I feel like my skills or experience is being taken advantage of or under utilized.

God wants our attention and if needed He will get your attention, but you probably won’t like how. We must learn to focus our time and energy better. We must learn to take the time to bring glory to the father and trust in his will.

I have walked away along my own path before and when things went badly because I thought I could do it my way, I got frustrated and had a frank conversation with God. We’ll obviously the big guy upstairs gave me the best Red Forman I’d ever seen as I didn’t just get the smack upside the back of the head, but I got the boot too. We can try to do it our way, but don’t get mad when you ignore the warning and stick your finger in a light socket.

We want people to notice us and we often go to great lengths to make noise for people to see us. How many kids get in trouble at school just so someone will notice them? How many mass shooting/suicides are done by those who lived as loners, who wanted people to love them and pay attention to them? The numbers are staggering when we realize that if we just loved a little more, most major tragedies could be avoided.

I say this to you, the only thing that truly matters is the love of the Lord. We can walk with people all day long, but people are cruel, and judgmental, and are often self-centered. The cost for not turning to the Lord can be high, and in most cases much higher then we’re willing to pay. Though we’re not willing to pay it, but when we spend so much time ignoring God can we truly be surprised by the consequences of our own actions? You can spend far less time and energy loving God and walking on God’s terms, then the misery you’ll find yourself in and the effort you’ll spend trying to fix your life when it all goes to Hades. Do it right the first time and God won’t have to smack you on your head. You have attention, but you just need to focus on where it’s coming from. If you don’t feel like you belong keep searching because somewhere, there’s a place you’ll call home. It’s not always easy to find, but God wants you to be around like minded Christian folks. Keep searching and never give up hope. Go outside your comfort zone and put your feelers out and God will lead you where you have to go. You have to have faith. Keep pushing forward and listen to God and you’ll find your way.

Explosive Memories

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Explosive Memories

I try not to think about it most of the time. I remember the sounds, the sights, even the smell of sulfur. I can remember each incident and as much as I try not to think about it, there are days. The struggle for veterans returning home from war can vary differently from one to the next. For me I have spent years facing my demons. Behind every uniform is a story. My story hasn’t ended, but my time in uniform has. The wounds left behind leave scars and those don’t ever go away. I can remember one explosion after another, and from the way it feels as the blast goes through you. I remember the fear I would face while on patrol, trying to stay focused, but in those memories, I sadly brought them home with me. My time in war fundamentally changed me, and because of that, because of how I was changed, I find some days I struggle to enjoy some of the same things other people like.

The other day I was driving to work and found myself in a traffic jam. Most people would perhaps be a little frustrated, but me, there’s a level of fear, and that fear turns to anger. I am terrified of sitting in traffic because I am not in control at all. I am afraid of being caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. I am afraid of the trash on the side of the road. I’m afraid of the crowds I encounter while I’m out in public. I’m afraid of the movie theater. I’m afraid of the mall. I’m afraid of being caught ill prepared. In my life I have spent a lot of time focusing on the what ifs, planning for the emergencies to be as prepared as possible. I have to hope that in the darkness of this world, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Revelation 21:4“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”

 John 16:33“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” In my day, I am haunted by the memories of my past. I have struggled to let go, and remember that Christ overcame the world. His blood set me free, and though my trials my be today, my Heaven is tomorrow. Living with PTSD isn’t always easy, but we keep pushing forward. Dealing with the day-to-day strife can lead your heart to feel heavy. We must not focus on the cant’s, or why something is too hard, we need to focus on what we can do. John 14:1“Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me.” Though my past and my grief haunt me, I must thank the Lord for the love and mercy that’s placed upon me every day. Jesus has offered me everything, and I can’t let the pain of yesterday turn my focus. The Devil tries to distract me, lie to me, prey on my weaknesses, and I will admit, some days he gets his claws in and it’s all I can do to push him away. Don’t forget the purposes of our true journey. Keep pushing forward and focus on today, not yesterday.

I think back to the day I was something in my own eyes, and when the tornado struck my life and ruin was left in it’s wake, I think back to how foolish I was to think my happiness could last. I placed my self worth on those around me. I placed my happiness in the hands of others, to include family, friends, and my wife. I trusted all the wrong people, and putting my faith in the world, thinking if I walked the walk, talk the talk, prayed the prayers, that I might be spared the hardships of another divorce or worse. The thing is when you are strong in your faith, the Devil attacks, and he attacks, and he’s relentless to see how long he can push you till you break. How much  can you take before you curse God, turn your back, and walk deeper down the dark path.

No matter the hardships you’ve endured, the horrors you’ve seen, you need to remember who the true enemy is at the end of the day. Put not your faith in man for we are fickle and swayed easily, but put your faith in the Lord for God is never changing, and always we are found in God’s love and grace. The road is long, but the blessings of tomorrow outweigh the pain of today.

Bullies

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Bullies

Sometimes in life you will encounter a person in power and they will be more or less a bully. I’ve been in situations where I’ve had bosses or supervisors that no matter what I’ve done or tried to do, nothing was ever good enough. I think we’ve all encountered people in our professional lives that just made the work experience near unbearable. A friend recently told me, “you don’t quit jobs, you quit managers.” I had never thought of leaving a job like that before. When I put a little thought into it, I realize that most of the time when I have not liked a job, it turned out to be the boss that made it the worst.

The Devil is a bully. He will push you, lie to you, and attempt to break you. The Devil hates you for all that you are. Isn’t it wonderful though that we have a God that loves us for who we are? We never have to work for that love. We’re not judged with how much we work, or how many brownie points we can get. God is fully aware of what’s in our heart and our motives. It’s the love that matters.

When you encounter a bully in your life there are millions of ways people will tell you to handle them. In my own life I have heard the, ‘just ignore them.’ Advice. I have heard the, ‘make fun of yourself right along with the bully,’. I have heard ‘stand up for yourself, by any means necessary.’ While each one of these is very popular, I would suggest turning to the bible to find your true good advice Matthew 5:43-48“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’44 But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust. 46 For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? 47 And if you greet only your brothers,[a] what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? 48 You therefore must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” We cannot allow ourselves to loose sight of God. We must not allow ourselves to succumb to the darkness. Anger, and hate lead to the dark side. We must stand firm. We must never loose control in anger. 2 Timothy 1:7“7 for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”

It’s easy to get wrapped up in our anger and that anger can blind us to the path that’s best for us. That anger and rage that can bubble up from years of torment, or physiological torture, can be hard to control. We must never set out to find our own vengeance though. Violence always begets violence. We cannot expect to change the world by physical means. Romans 12:19-20 “19 Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it[a] to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” 20 To the contrary, “if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.” If your bully attacks you, ask if you can pray for them. If they attack you, ask if everything’s okay at home. Bullies often have misguided anger or rage. Do not hate the bully nor pass judgment upon them. We never know someone’s circumstances, and while it never excuses their actions, it may provide some incite. Generally, hurting people hurt others. We cannot allow ourselves to let our tormentors to breach our heart with hate. We must not allow hate to take route in our souls. 1 John 2:9 “Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness.”

We must stand firm on love. Let love be our war cry and in everything we do, and everything we experience trust in the Lord to save you, and pull you through. Psalm 18:3 I ” call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies.” We have to trust in the Lord to deliver us from evil. There will always be bullies for as long as there is anger and hate in this world. Bullies feel the need to be in power. Bullies feel the need to be in control and those in control often feel they have to force their subordinates into submission. Matthew 5:38-41“I call upon the Lord, who is worthy to be praised, and I am saved from my enemies.” The bullies we have will beat you and hurt you emotionally. They will continue to try to break you down and look forward to seeing you breaking.

We have all encountered these people in our lives. Many have experienced bullying in school, and some in the adult world. Those difficult people are everywhere and in our struggle we must pray to be delivered from the hands of the enemy. Psalm 82:4 “Rescue the weak and the needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked.” No matter the trials that befall you, you get back up and never let your own worth reside by the hands of your enemies. We must remain strong, and trust that we are worth more then what others can make us feel. Proverbs 24:16“for the righteous falls seven times and rises again, but the wicked stumble in times of calamity.” We must always get back up. We know that for every fall we rise in strength, and we can be stronger then before if we learn a lesion with each fall. Finally I will say do not attack your attacker. We must learn and I must reiterate the importance to not attack your attacker. I am not saying do not defend yourself in the event there is a physical altercation, but what I am saying is never attack out of anger. If you are being physically assaulted you should leave that situation and find help, or defend yourself and at the first chance remove yourself from your situation and again go find help. Stand firm in your faith and with love and compassion live your life. 1 Peter 3:8-9“8 Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind. 9 Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.”