Tag: jesus christ

Following the World Phenomenon

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Following the World Phenomenon

I recently saw Star Wars Last Jedi and let me start off by saying it was amazing! This however will not be a movie review. Instead it will be about how we as a society follow the flow.

Society changes what’s accepted over time, and when we base our values off of societies acceptance. So without making to many waves, and pissing everyone off, let me just say this. The bible says what it says. We need to realize first and foremost that we are all sinners. We live in a fallen sin world, and no matter where we turn, or what we do we will sin, our neighbors will sin, and there isn’t anything we can do about it. We instead must accept that we are sinners and in turn accept that there’s only one way out of that, and that’s following the one true light of this world Jesus Christ. We have to remember that in God’s eyes not one sin is worse then others. In our mind of course adultery isn’t as bad as murder, but the fact is, they are on equal footing at the cross. We can only hope in the Lord, accept we sin, ask for the forgiveness for our sins. We must try to live our life as sinless as possible and for the times we do, ask for forgiveness, from both the Lord and those whom we’ve sinned against. We must seek for repentance of our sins. This means we apologize from our hearts, and actively try to make it right. What does that mean?

When we wrong someone we think in our society today that all we have to do is utter a few words and it’s all better. I’m sorry doesn’t hold a whole lot of weight if the person doesn’t mean it. It doesn’t hold a lot of weight if that person never does anything to make the wronging any better. If you break something of someone’s I’m sorry is nice but it doesn’t make anything right. Replacing it and maybe a little something extra is repentance. We don’t do that anymore in our world.

Someone who stood me up and flaked on our plans we had made has hurt my feelings recently. Over and over this person made plans and failed to follow through. Finally I said something about how my feelings had been hurt, and I received an “I’m sorry.” Just a couple days later I sent a text about new plans we had made and I sat back and I waited to hear back. 2 hours later and I’m still waiting. 4 hours, and still nothing. 8 hours had passed before I finally heard back. I was unhappy to say the least and this time I wasn’t as passive as I had been in the past. I was hurt, and I expressed that pain, and how decency would have been to call or text me to let me know what was going on instead of making me wait all day. Instead of an apology, the friendship was dissolved right then and there. I hadn’t done anything wrong, but instead of trying to make up for it, or even apologizing for it, the friendship was ended. (Yes I can hear many of you now, then they weren’t a real friend, and yes I get that, but it doesn’t take the sting away.)

We as a society have become cold, and callused. We no longer have empathy, or sympathy for those in pain. We feel everyone’s pain is either brought on my their own doing, or just a part of life. I’ve had many people tell me ‘Why feel sorry for it, it’s just life.’ Isn’t it a sad day when we offer empathy for someone’s situation and it’s deflected as a simple matter as it’s life.

We must remember that to follow Christ is to let go of the world. We must learn the difference between what society says is right and what the bible says is right. While I absolutely love the Star Wars phenomenon and other big names, it’s important to keep in mind the difference between enjoying a movie or show, and conforming to the acceptance of the world. Don’t forget what real truth is.

A Hospital Day

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A Hospital Day

After waking up in agonizing pain I quickly realized something was wrong. My back hurting before I went to bed turned into unbearable abdomen pain. I quickly realized I was in trouble when I collapsed in the living room. My mother quickly got dressed to take me to the VA ER. I was admitted quickly and within minutes I was hooked up to an IV and I was getting nausea medication and pain medicine. The trip to the ER was difficult. During the 30-minute car ride I got sick out the window twice. The immense pain caused me to get sick, and then again on the hospital bed.

Within moments of receiving the first round of meds I began to feel better. Less then an hour later I was getting a CT of my gut and surrounding organs. The first thought was my Gal Bladder. This was ruled out after everything came back okay. Either my back was having major spasms, or I had a bacterial/viral infection in my intestinal tract. I was eventually released to go home. 3 days of light liquid diet of nothing but soups.

Once I returned home I was so tired I fell asleep quickly and slept most of the afternoon. When I got up it was time to go to the Christmas Cantata. This year the cantata was amazing. The singers this year were fantastic and of course the narration was great.

No matter the pitfalls that may come in your day, your week, your year, you will always have the chance to reflect on the years past and remember that the only thing worthwhile is the knowledge that at some point 2000 years ago a baby was born. A baby that would one day grow to sacrifice himself to be the salvation for all of our sins. We are a fallen world and we would be without hope if we didn’t have Christ. We cannot hope to overcome sin on our own. We need to understand that in order to do that we must follow the light of the entire world. The prince of peace came and lived with us as one of us but also apart so we may relate to God, and know that God relates to us. We can only put our faith in one place and that’s the Lord above. No matter how bad things get we know that God’s still with us, God’s always in control, and we can take comfort in that.

You may be sick, you may be down on your luck, you may be in pain both physical or emotional, but in this time of year, try not to let the holiday blues take over, instead try to find something selfless to do. Try to remember the season of giving, the season of good will towards others, and to love your neighbor.

Love CHRIST and celebrate His Risen Birthday! This the Birthday we should always want to celebrate.

Joy to the World

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Joy to the World

The horrors of this world are many and can be found anywhere. You turn on your television, or the pages of the morning paper, scrolling through Facebook, no matter where you look, there’s so many horrible things being shoved in your face every day. How can we find joy and hope this holiday season with so much pain in this world? The very short, very easy answer is Jesus Christ, the baby who was born to live a life fully human and fully God at the same time. The God who lived a full life to experience the joy, and the pain of our life, and the God who wanted us to see resemblance within our own life. When we are going through something horrible and we are told to pray to God about our woe’s, we can because God truly does understand. There’s nothing easy about living this life, but it’s when we are brought to our knees we can truly see the joys of this world.

Sometimes it’s hard to see the good in people when we are living on top of the world. It’s hard to see the generosity of people when we have everything we want. When you’re struggling to get by and someone gives to you out of the kindness of their heart, that’s when you know there are still decent people out there. When you are in line at the grocery store and you’re a single mother of 3 and someone picks up the grocery tab for you. When you’re at a restaurant and someone pays for your table, that’s when you know good people are still around and hate hasn’t won the day.

While at times it seems like hate is everywhere you look, and racism, and bigotry is everywhere, there are also people who live like Jesus commanded. It’s simple this time of year, look to the heavens and remember that a child was born, he lived along side us, and eventually died because of us and in doing so saved us from ourselves. We were saved from an eternal fate of death. We celebrate the birth of that little baby, and we need to remember it’s not about the gifts we give to one another, it’s about the gift that was given to us.

Luke 2: 9-14 “9 And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were filled with great fear. 10 And the angel said to them, “Fear not, for behold, I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. 11 For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. 12 And this will be a sign for you: you will find a baby wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.” 13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, 14 “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.”

 The child born that night sometime in the spring would bring forth both hope and despair. Hope for those who thirst for truth, knowledge and love beyond our own understanding. Those who knew and understood that without the love and sacrifice of the Lord we would always be bound to die by Sin. Despair for those who have embraced their sin and refuse to acknowledge the need for a savior. Whenever Christ is the topic, conflict ensues. While Jesus was being born Harod set out to slaughter thousands of first born children. When Jesus would spread the truth about God, angry hoards would gather and force him from the town. Sin breed’s hatred of the convictions held deep beneath the surface. The truth is we are in the darkness if we do not understand the true meaning of Christmas. We should be singing songs and praising the Lord and Saviors birthday! It’s a birthday party and for those who scream Scrooge this year, I say bah humbug to you. Enjoy this birthday celebration and one day when this life passes away we will have a celebration of our own as we enter the eternal city. Spread a little Christmas cheer this year and remember it’s not about the presents, it’s not about the tinsel on the tree, it’s about the love we share, the joy of knowing that God is still on the throne and still in control. Knowing we have overcome death, and that we were saved because of a little baby born so many years ago.

So, even when things are down and you may have the holiday blues remember the real meaning this year and try to let go of your inner Scrooge and praise for the blessings in your life. So joy to the world, and good will towards all men and women.

 

 

 

 

Christmas Wish

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Christmas Wish

The weather turns cold and the air is crisp. It bites and buries deep down into your bones. The Christmas tree is up, the lights are on, and the Christmas cheer is strewn about nearly everywhere you look. When you think about yourself this holiday season, how do you feel? Are you Scrooge, the Grinch, or jolly old Saint Nick? Are you finding your cheer, or are you feeling down? For many reasons a person can become depressed during the holidays even amidst the joy that comes celebrating the messiah’s birthday!

This year I find myself struggling with the realization that I am still alone a second Christmas in a row. It’s hard for me watching friends post family photos, and how many of them are starting families, or growing their family this time of year. I’ve found it difficult to maintain the smile I put on my face. The family reminder is hard, and knowing mine was torn apart and wishing for a family of my own has created a rough time. It’s hard watching as everyone I know seems to be so happy, and nearly complete. The hardest part about the holidays is not having someone special in your life to experience it with.

They say that this time of year all manner of miracles could happen. As I have prayed for a Christmas Miracle I realize that it’s only a matter if it’s something God wants for me right now. We must always remember that sometimes we want what we want, but it’s not what God wants for us. While I have spent over a year picking up the pieces of my broken heart, I have not found any comfort or solace in that time. I keep pushing forward one step at a time no matter how hopeless I often feel. The pieces of my heart look like a shattered ornament bulb broken on the floor. I’ve tried to tape it back together, but it’s hard to keep it from crumbling.

I know it’s probably a lot to ask for, but my grown up Christmas wish this year is to have someone special love me as much as I do them. It may sound silly, but it’s all I really want. I’ve had a slew of strange events happen to me this year, and I remember every day to keep and hold onto my faith. I know that the power of Love God has for me will never die, and will never loose it’s strength. No matter how far I feel I’ve fallen God is right there with me. I can fall over and over and God will always pick me up. I am weak and I know God’s love and grace should be enough for me, but it’s hard. I can only keep putting one foot in front of the other in hopes that one day I will learn to run again.

This is my Christmas wish, my one hope, my only request; I wish to not be alone for yet another year. I wish to have someone fall for me as I do them, deeply in love. I wish to feel something I’ve not felt before, and I wish to experience things I haven’t yet felt. I pray for my heart be healed and mended back together. I pray for these things as my one and only Christmas wish. In the name of God all things are possible, and if it’s not my time, I learn to understand that it’s about God’s time, not my own.

Amen.

Wants of Life

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Wants of life

Sometimes in life we can want something so badly but we never get it. I have experienced that a lot this last year. The things I’ve wanted and I have prayed for have never come to be. While I greatly appreciate the things I do have, there area couple of things I don’t have I long for and wonder why I’ve yet to be given the things I desire most.

We often ask ourselves what we’ve done to deserve such horrible things in our life. While sometimes our bad miss fortune comes from our own selfish and arrogant choices, sometimes bad things happen to the innocent just because of other people’s selfishness. In those bad times we may wish we had it better, or often say if I only had this life wouldn’t be so hard anymore. While these statements are true and probably have been uttered by nearly every one of us at some point, it’s the struggles in our life that truly define who we are. How one person deals with adversity is far more important then how hey deal with life’s bliss.

When we look to the things we desire we can’t always see the writing on the wall, that sometimes that thing, that one thing we wanted may actually not be good for us at all. Sometimes we should be thankful for unanswered prayers. We must accept

that if the time comes we will get what we want, and if we don’t there’s probably a reason for it.

My deepest desire is for a family of my own. To find a woman to love and cherish who will do the same to me. Someone I can have kids with and experience what it is to be a parent. While I’ve been so close to

That and have watched it crumble and be ripped away, I believe even though I’m incredibly lonely this holiday season, some day, my princess will come. (Yes I know it sounds cheesy)

Truly I would love for someone to take up the mantle of my Black Canary. I would love for someone to come into my life that will accept me, and help me along my path. You know you’re on the right path when in two people you find one another’s best selves. When you push each other to be better, to grow, to support one another. Having faith in those relationships despite my own horrors in my past relationships, it’s something I still dream about and long for.

Have faith that God is still there and if you haven’t gotten what you want, that you’re being prepared for it, or something better. God Loves his children and wants his children to be happy. Plans for joy, not pain. We must remember to have faith, keep the fire and light bright in our spirits and remember that God is supreme. Recognize the blessings this holiday season, and remember the reason we celebrate. It’s not the presents, it’s not the food, it’s the baby that so many years ago that was born to one day die to break the chains of eternal sin. Merry Christmas to all. And thank God for unanswered prayers.

All our Hope

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All our hope

All we can do is drop to our knees and pray, placing all our hope in Jesus. I know I’m not worthy to inherit the Kingdom of Heaven, but God is big and I am small. Some people are cruel, and manipulative. Pray to God for their souls, pray to God for the change that needs to happen.

I’ve been down on my knees a lot lately. I’ve been taken to the emotional woodshed, and all I can say is Thank God yesterday’s gone. Im no stranger to pain, no stranger to heartache and heartbreak, but I’m free and I’m saved in the Blood of Christ. We can be beaten, tortured, we can loose it all on this world, and we can be broken down, we can be so hurt we may not feel like we can breathe anymore, but if you can still draw breath, then the hope in Christ, all our sins are forgiven, our tears will one day be wiped away, and the pain of yesterday will be gone.

There’s nothing anyone can do to take your salvation away. Your heart for Jesus will outlive your pain, the attacks you will face daily. ‘If you can take it you can make it’ unbroken.

A Journey In The Darkness

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A Journey in the darkness

Psalm 91:4 “He shall cover thee with his feathers, and under his wings shalt thou trust: his truth shall be thy shield and buckler.”

The joys of this life can be easily snuffed out in the mists of dark days, of struggles, and of heartbreak. When the days get you down you have to be strong. It’s so easy to fall into darkness and despair. I’ve seen it happen in my own life, and in the lives of many that I know. Despair is a dangerous and sometimes deadly trap. Despair can easily turn into quicksand and drag you down, and must like the Dementors in the famed Harry Potter books, it can suck the happiness right out of your lungs and make you feel like you’ll never be happy again. One thing in my own life I’ve found is how fickle some friends can be. Since my gun shot wound a year ago I’ve found more and more friends are fickle and come around only when they want something, or they are bored and know you’ll be there as a last resort.

While there’s no doubt that this hurts, and I know I can’t be the only person that goes through this, what hurts the most is the exodus that’s occurred. While I realize that bullet changed my life, and while I am responsible, the feeling of loss from the mass abandonment that was left behind is heart breaking. Now over a year later, I’ve had another exodus from obvious different causes, but never the less the pain is the same. This presents a new kind of struggle, and yet again staring at the brink of darkness, and once more unto the breach. The war continues and as there is a great sense of loss, I am left with one undeniable fact, that I am not alone. Though the case may be that while physically and emotionally I am or feel alone, God is always there with me. While this doesn’t take away the desire and drive to meet someone special, or want to make new local friends, it does prevent me from falling into complete and total despair.

I know at the end of the day when I’m feeling down and I’m feeling blue, I know that my future is much brighter then it appears because I know that my Abba is looking out over me. I swore no matter how bad it got I would never stair down the wrong side of that circumstance again, and that I would be an advocate for finding another way. There is always hope as long as we breath, and while I am lonely, while my Christmas wish is to find love, and to not being alone anymore, and to make some good local friends, I know that God is with me and in time, those things will be mine, because it’s what my deepest desire is from my heart. I may not always makes the right choices, but I try to.

If you’re feeling despair this season reach out, find someone. If you’re happy as can be this holiday season, reach out to your friends or family that are having a hard time. Don’t forget this is both the happiest time of year, and often the saddest. Faith is so important, and even when it’s sometimes hard, don’t loose hope, and never give up. Don’t ever forget that you can be protected under Angels wings, and your God, the King of all is powerful enough to handle any situation, every tear, every cut, you aren’t suffering through it alone. God is not just watching, God experiences it all with us. Rest assure you will make it out, and one day you will make it home, a home of pure perfection.

 

 

 

Breaks my Heart

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Breaks my Heart

Going into this holiday season it breaks my heart to think about all those people out there who are suffering, who’ve lost everything, who feel hopeless. It breaks my heart to think about all those people who are without homes, without family, and have so much less then I do. I was just in Hawaii and the number of homeless is staggering. I’ve been all over the world and I’ve seen what poverty looks like up close. I’ve seen homes made of mud and no floors. I’ve seen houses made of scrap metal and tin, and we in America take for granted many of the gifts we have. It breaks my heart those who suffer from heartbreak this time of year. How many people suffer through divorce, or death, or loss of jobs this time of year? This time of year is hardest on people, and also the most joyful, but we can’t forget what it’s all about.

 

It’s hard being alone not having someone to share this time of year with. I miss going Christmas shopping, and cuddling by the fire watching Christmas movies. I miss sharing a glass of eggnog, and awaiting the look on my love’s face when they open the perfect gift. It’s a hard time for me this year, and even as hard as it is for me, I know others, many, many others, have it so much then myself. I feel more connected to the suffering of others this year then I have in the past.

 

This time of year we remember the goodness in our lives. We remember that the Son of the Lord was born and we celebrate the birth of our Savior. We celebrate the birth of a Child that would grow to take our sins upon himself and pay for our sins in innocent blood. The Lord blesses us every day and we often take those blessings for granted. When I look at all the suffering in this world I feel so small, what can I possibly do?

 

When I was in Hawaii recently I looked around and realized how blessed I was. I was in a wonderful place, with beautiful caring people, and I thought about those who where far worse off then me. All we can do is believe that God’s in charge and have faith that it’s working out. We have the ability to change the lives of those around us, if we just have the eyes and the heart to fight for change. We can’t always change or save everyone, but we can try.

 

Remember this time of year isn’t about the shiny baubles, the gifts, the shiny lights and colors, it’s about the good will towards your fellow neighbors. It’s about celebrating the birth of our savior Jesus Christ. We need to take a step back from the commercials, the drive to shop till you drop, and all the other things that draws your attention from the true beauty of our holiday. Of course enjoy the holiday and all that goes will, just make sure you don’t loose that focus. Take a little thought and pray for those who are less fortunate. It’s cold this time a year and there are families without food, without heat, and many without a home. Pray for them, and do something nice. Good will towards your fellow humans. Be kind, and be generous.

The Real Superhero’s Thanksgiving

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The Real Superhero’s Thanksgiving

What are we thankful for? This last year has been one of the hardest of my life. In that struggle however, I’ve had many blessings, and I’ve found great strength in Christ. It’s in that strength that we find ourselves thankful. What are we thankful for? Me personally in this last year I find myself thankful for my mother who’s been an incredible help to me this year. I am debt free which is an amazing feeling. 1 have been blessed getting so much worked out this year. I’ve gotten my finances finalized as I’m not Debt Free! I’ve gotten a slight increase in my VA disability, and I’m safe and sound in a home.

While not every plans works out to our likening, we must still be thankful for what we have, and what we don’t. God turns our mess into a message. We can take comfort knowing that no matter what happens good or bad, we can be thankful for the sacrifice Christ made for us and know that our salvation came at a great cost, and yet it was paid in full. No matter the dark skys, the storms that rage, you need to ride it out, and when the wave comes you need to take the opportunity to pop up and ride it. The storms will split and the SON is still just beyond the clouds always there.

Be thankful to the real superhero Jesus Christ. He fought and overcame death itself. But in our lives, I want to remind everyone to give thanks to those in harms way today. Our military, law enforcement, first responders, and firefighters are all part of our nations superheroes. They are working today to ensure everyone is safe. While they are away from their families today say a prayer for them and be thankful. I challenge everyone to find the smallest things to be grateful and list them out. You can find thanks in everything we have big and small. No matter the season, set that aside today, and be thankful. Enjoy the festivities of today even if things aren’t perfect for you.

I know all too well how it can be sad, but there’s worst things in this life. I have family, my dogs, and things aren’t bad. I challenge you all to post a comment about what you’re thankful for today.

Back To Life

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Back to life

The return to my normal life came back like a kick in the face. Less then 24 hours after my return I find myself right back in the war. My first appointment was supposed to be easy and straight forward and yet the VA’s propensity for failure is never without a small sense of irony.

While the appointment wasn’t a total loss, it was a quick reminder I’m no longer in paradise and I needed to be ready to pick up arms again and be ready for the impending fight.

When you return from a vacation, or in my case an intense clinic of physical and psychological exorcises designed to push, motivate, and rejuvenate your soul, it’s a challenge returning to life and watching as the difficulty continues.

It’s important to stay focused and realize that just because there are hiccups in the road doesn’t mean all is lost. I’m finding myself in a struggle to manage the emotional roller coaster, but as far as frustrations go, breaking out in chronic hives is high on my list. Breathing and trying to recall the serenity prayer is a big step for me to remaining focused on the big picture.