The Search For a Unicorn

The Search For a Unicorn 

Have you ever considered what you may be looking for or hoping for just isn’t out there? Waiting it seems is a constant throughout the world, one that we all despise but all must learn to live with. Some of us do this with more flair then others, some of us do this poorly. What is it about waiting we don’t like. Speaking from experience I don’t like to wait for long. I think I have a bit longer then some, but far shorter fuse then others. I’m not as short as to say I am a part of the instant gratification group, but I don’t think I’m that far off either. I’ve heard a great many people tell me I need to be patient, I need to just give it time, I need to stop looking because when you stop that’s when what you will show up, when you least expect it too.

 

It’s been 8 months of healing, of recovery, of self-reflection, life reflection, and rebuilding. 8 months may not seem like a lot to some people, but to me it’s been an eternity. My particular situation has been of isolation (not entirely by choice) and loneliness. I have found that the quiet of the house isn’t as bad as it used to be. Early in the process I felt as if I would never again be happy, that I would never again see the light at the end of the tunnel, but as time moved on, and I continued to breathe, wake up in the morning, and go about my day to day responsibilities the loneliness became a bit more tolerable. Fast forward 8 months, and that forward momentum and progress seems to be slowing down. Now 8 months later as I’ve continued to improve myself, spending more time in my Bible, making new friends (albeit internet friends) I find myself struggling to find tangible friendships, or even, the ever elusive date.

 

Dating it seems has become something of a skilled endeavor. I was listening to K-Love the other day and they said that the number 1 way to meet new members of the opposite sex for dating was still the old fashioned way, through mutual friends. The number 2 way was now online dating. The online dating world isn’t news to me. As I found early on in my 8 month journey my friends in this instance weren’t likely to provide any fruit. So I turned to the online dating apps and as I am now moving into my 8 month mark, I can safely say I have very little to show for it. The results of 8 months’ worth of exploration has been a few online friends, but nothing that has led to dating. I have estimated sending out over a thousand messages of greetings over several dating platforms, and sadly have come up with the big bubkus. Why has it been so difficult to find even a single date? As I have continued to reflect on this I haven’t been able to come up with very many reasons, and most of the reasons aren’t looking too favorable for myself as far as self-esteem is concerned. Is it me? Is it my looks, or my approach? For the vast majority of my life, my looks have been something of a rough topic for me. All my years I was told I wasn’t handsome enough, and many have gone further to say I’m just plan ugly. While I don’t strictly think this is true, I have come to the mindset that I am not all that attractive in the grand scheme of things. This however doesn’t prevent me from trying. I have not reclused myself and given up hope. The next possibility is that God doesn’t want me to right now. As this line of thought brings up a dozen questions, the basic answer is, it doesn’t matter. God’s design is far beyond our understanding and thus the rest is just a formality.

 

I have put lots of thought into the last part of that and have questioned why God wouldn’t want me to date. Could it be that there hasn’t been 100% resolution between me and my ex? Could it be because where I’m living isn’t where I’m meant to be? Could it be that I am somehow not ready for something, someone else to come along? It seems my search for a companion, or even just a friend to go out and spend time with has become a hunt for the elusive unicorn. As I have now been the victim of, or rather the survivor of 2 horrible affairs leading to being treated horribly in divorce, I now question if the person out there for me is there, or some mysterious unicorn that I may spend a lifetime looking for.

 

There are several verses I consider when I think about the amount of time I’ve had to wait and it seems still have to wait. 2 Samuel 5:4 “David was thirty years old when he became king, and he reigned forty years.” David was promised the throne early in life. He waited nearly 20 years before God gave to him what was promised. Romans 12:12 “Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.” We struggle with this concept, especially in America because of everything we have to receive instant gratification. Romans 8:25 “But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.” No matter how long we wait, we must understand there is purpose to it. There is purpose to our waiting, to our suffering, to or tribulations, but in that we can always have faith that God will never forsake us, and God always hears our prayers and knows our suffering. Philippians 4:6 ”Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.” We may think but God already knows what we want, knows our hearts, knows our desires, knows our suffering, and while that is true, the concept here is prayer. We must always pray, always keep that line of communication open with God. You may not always feel as if God is listening, but He is. We may not always hear our path, but no matter what we think or feel, God is right there next to us.

 

It’s a hard concept for sure, and one I myself have daily struggles with. When life is going well and it seems we have everything we want it’s easy to move along and forget about anything about our joy. It’s in our struggles we wish for more, we wish for the time of suffering to be as little as possible. Sure, no one likes to be miserable or hurting especially when it’s matters of the heart. The only thing we can do is keep trying, keep moving forward, and never allow the Devil to influence us to take the easy way out. Instant gratification is not the prescription for long term relief. In fact, that instant gratification will likely be the cause of more hardships later on in life. Keep moving forward, keep praying to God, and if you’re like me, if you’re lonely and you feel as if your loneliness will never go away, have faith, and someday your prince, or princess will come. Your unicorn may seem like a myth right now, but keep your ear to the ground, and your faith strong with Christ, and some day, your fairytale will come true.

Broken Arrow

Broken Arrow

 ‘Because He Lives’ By Matt Maher

I was dead in the grave

I was covered in sin and shame

I heard mercy call my name

He rolled the stone away

 Amen, Amen

I’m alive, I’m alive

Because He lives

Amen, Amen

Let my song join the one that never ends

 

We live because he lives. We can never repay for the harm and damage we’ve done to God all these years. We hurt others and we damage relationships we’ve once cherished and loved. We drove nails into our savior’s hands and feet. We laid a crown of thorns upon his head and mocked him, spit on him, even cast lots for remains of his clothing. The King of the Jews, the soldiers laughed as he slowly asphyxiated. “Tetelestai” Jesus proclaimed which translated means it is finished. Not that he was saying is last, but with his last heartbeat all of mankind’s sins would be forgiven. Christ was the sacrificial lamb, and despite everything we have done, despite everything humanity would do in the future, the atrocities proclaimed in the name of religion, all the pain we would cast upon one another, forgiveness in love was and is the path to an eternity of perfection with our creator.

As an archer I believe strongly in the idea that an arrow is strong, and as true as the archer who shoots it. In the right hands an arrow can bring death and life at the same time. An archer can defend ones home, defend ones kingdom against invaders, and provide needed food for their family. An archer must take care of his bow and arrows in order for them to continue to do what he needs. If an arrow completely breaks there are only some things an archer can do to repair the damage. Damage will come and maintenance and care will be needed to maintain. Our faith is the same way. If we do not maintain our faith, our constant days in prayer, reading and study of scripture, our fellowship with other Christians, we too will find that our faith will break.

A while back someone did something that I felt was a betrayal of the deepest kind. They made a decision for what they must have thought was right, but it hurt me dearly. I thought that friendship, that bond that was shared was stronger then that, but in that moment I felt the stab in the heart on a very arrow I once used. The arrow broke in half, and I believed it could never be repaired. I believed after that kind of betrayal nothing could ever repair the damage. What if I was wrong? It wasn’t about forgiveness; it was about understanding the motive. What if because of my own vantage point I couldn’t see the whole story, what if there was more to it?

What I know is no matter the pain the right thing to do is offer forgiveness. We were never worthy of the forgiveness we were given by Christ, but alas we Live because Jesus Died. No matter what the wound is, forgiveness is about harmony. Matthew 6:14-15 14 For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. 15 But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Often I hear people say I forgive you, but I’m still mad at you. I say this isn’t true forgiveness. If you truly forgive someone you hold nothing against him or her any longer. If someone truly repents from then on forgive. Ephesians 4:31-32 31 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. 32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Believe though there is a difference between repenting and a sorry. Repenting is taking action to make things right. This to try and ensure the grievance won’t happen again. An apology must be from the heart, not just ‘sorry’ because just a sorry may mean I’m sorry I got caught. What is that apology if the action continues to happen? If someone truly is sorry, and there is real repentance in their heart try to take them at their word. REMEMBER THOUGH, FORGIVENESS DOES NOT REQUIRE AN APOLOGY FROM THE OTHER PERSON!

Don’t let anger and hate break an arrow. Don’t let your personal feelings cloud your judgment. Always keep in mind there are two sides to a story and we may never know all of it. We may never understand the why and the how. Love is the key and love is the answer. Gods love is greater and stronger then we will ever know, and if we are to live Christ Like then we must be able to channel at least a little of that love and don’t allow anger and hate to break any of our arrows. We are weapons for Christ, and in that our arrows are our weapons we use to spread the Holy Spirit in the Word of God. Remember we must perform maintenance on our hearts just like our bow, and when we clear out the imperfections, when we watch for cracks, or damages, we can fix them before they become major problems. No matter how far you’ve gone down a path we can always unmake a mistake by truly repenting in our hearts, and asking for forgiveness. Don’t let fear and doubt keep you from salvation.

I say to you lift your hands to the sky and praise your God and ask for Forgiveness for all you’ve done. Forgive all those who’ve wronged you and hurt you. Go to God with a clear heart, and let the Holy Spirit fill it. There will always be people out there to hurt us, but we don’t have to hold onto that anger that hate. Offer up yourself, and be a warrior for God. Pick up your bow and follow God. Strengthen them with love, hope, forgiveness, and your arrows will never be broken by the Devil.

 

 

 

I Volunteer As Tribute.

I Volunteer As Tribute.

One of the first things we are told in the military is never volunteer for anything. To volunteer in the military is usually a recipe for disaster. Usually to offer your time means some horrible thankless job that you’d regret being apart of. Luke 6:35 “But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil.” Even when it look rough, or horrible to give your personal time even when it looks like you won’t get anything out of it, to sacrifice for the greater good is something we’re called to do. Proverbs 11:24One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want.”

I heard a story recently of a love offering at my church for two families who were in dire need. While collecting the offering a member of one of the families put money into the offering plate. No matter the circumstance we should remember to give. I myself have struggled with that concept. I am always hesitant to give cash when I am not getting any. I can honestly say I have failed in my call to give. Giving is about loving. No matter if you give money, or time, or hospitality, follow 1 Corinthians 16:14 “Let all that you do be done in love.”

I can only hope that as time moves forward my unwillingness to give is forgiven and in time I can change my attitude about giving, and see what happens. As for giving there is more then one way to give. I may not have been overly giving as of late financially, but I do believe my willingness to give my time to teach the gospel accounts for something. A few months ago one of my subordinates didn’t have the funds needed to get himself lunch at work. At the time I knew I didn’t have the cash, or the money in my checking account so I chose to put it on my credit card. I got my officer lunch and even though I knew it meant I wouldn’t get anything, I was happy that my officer was fed and happy. My time in the service even though short taught me to always take care of your soldiers. As a follower of Christ I believe God is the same way. I believe God always takes care of his Children, especially the ones who fight for him. Back in September I swore to be a Soldier for Christ and to teach and preach the Gospel. As I have always had a soldiers mentality, I believe this has been my calling all along. I felt a calling towards the Bible all my life but I ran from it. It appears we are to go through training before we take our place. The Lord wants us to volunteer to be a soldier. It may take time but if God wants us to serve, He’ll have his way, one way or another. No real use fighting it, the pain and trials that we go through prepare us for our mission.

To serve the Lord is an honorable calling, and I feel honored yet not worthy to do so. I hope and pray at the very least this Blog is pleasing to Him. It doesn’t seem prudent to run away from a calling. I consider what would have been like had King David run away from his calling to be King. I consider the same for George Washington, or Neal Armstrong. How vastly different our history would be if any one of our influential individuals in history denied their calling.

So to wrap up, in the words of Katniss Everdeen “I Volunteer as Tribute” speaking to God of course. To volunteer for a cause greater then oneself is an honorable one. Ministry is no different then law enforcement and medical response services. To serve is to give.

Leap of Faith

Leap of Faith

Sometimes in life you have to take a leap without looking where you may land. We don’t always know why God leads us down a particular path, but one thing is certain, there is most certainly a plan.

It’s been over 30 days now since I have been back to work. Just when I thought all hope was lost I get a call out of the blue asking if I’d like to go to work for a new account manager. Without hesitation and without knowing all the details I agreed. “God” I asked, “This is obviously part of the plan, if this is what you want me to do, I will follow your path.” I don’t know where my future will take me, but I have faith, and that faith no matter where the river takes me, I’ll not fight it.

What would you do if you had to take a leap of faith? What would you do if Jesus asked you to drop everything, leave everything and follow? Would you do it? 1 Peter 2:21 “For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, so that you might follow in his steps.” Christ asks us to pick up our cross and follow. This is noted more then once in scripture. When Christ gathered his 12 disciples he asked them to take a leap of faith, giving up their jobs, their wives, their families, to follow the Lord. Matthew 4:19-2219 And he saith unto them, Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men. 20 And they straightway left their nets, and followed him. 21 And going on from thence, he saw other two brethren, James the son of Zebedee, and John his brother, in a ship with Zebedee their father, mending their nets; and he called them. 22 And they immediately left the ship and their father, and followed him.”

 As I move forward into my new life and I watch the old fade away, I too must decide what am I willing to give up, what am I willing to leave in order to follow my calling. The incontrovertible fact is I cannot, I will not stay stagnant in my walk with Christ. I know that many may think I’m crazy for pursuing the life style I am working towards and even hated by some, I know that I would rather be judged and hated by them, then judged by God. Matthew 10:22 And you will be hated by all for my name’s sake. But the one who endures to the end will be saved.” Nothing this world can do to us is worse then the fate we face if we don’t follow the Lord. Ephesians 6:16 “In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;” Don’t let fear be what stops you.

 The Devil will lie to you to keep you from taking that leap. The Devil will try to persuade you by giving you all the reasons not to. The voices telling you, you aren’t good enough, not pretty enough, not strong enough, not smart enough, are all the lies because the voice of truth is anything in God is possible. Our path isn’t always the path we are meant to be on, and we must learn to discern the difference. Have faith and take a leap out of that plane, onto that path, make the move, make the change. Make a difference.

HOLD ME

 HOLD ME

My God my God I need your love. I need your grace, and I need your mercy. My God my God, I am lonely at night, and I need your love. My God my God, I’m afraid at night even though I fight with all my might. The silence in my world, I hate these silent nights. I want to calm my heart from the storm inside. My God my God, I’m on my knees, I’m praying to you oh Lord. Wrap me in your arms tonight and protect me. My God my God I trust in you, I believe in you. My God my God you can protect me from all these problems, you can free my soul, and bring me peace today.

My God my God please Hold Me today for I am weary. My God I read your words, and I hear your voice. I know of Isaiah 41:10Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” I feel you here, and I stay on my knees. I know you Love me my God, and I know I am safe. I know that in time this nightmare will leave me.

Oh my God I trust in you. Ephesians 3:17-19So that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith—that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.” When the storm inside is strong, and it thunders so loud in the silence, I pray to you my Lord. Quiet the storm and protect my spirit.

My enemies are vast oh Lord, but not of man, of the loneliness I feel. Romans 5:8But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” I know you gave me so much Lord, and I know I should not ask, but put your arms around me Lord and protect me this day. 1 John 4:16So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.”

 Today, or this night my Lord, you will provide me happiness in your Holy Name. I trust in you, and I know that in my heart you are with me. One day I will find what I seek according to your will my Lord. You will raise me up, and protect me. You will give me serenity in my time of crisis. I do not hate my enemies Lord, and I pray for those who’ve brought forth pain unto me. I believe in you, and your commandments my Lord. 1 John 4:19We love because he first loved us.”

When I rest my head to sleep, I trust in you to give me peace. When I rest my soul I know where my truth resides. I tear down my walls and trust in you. I’m not looking for a miracle, just looking for some peace of mind. I know all things are possible Lord and in your time. Hold me tonight let me know it’s going to be all right. I am on my knees praying for a win, praying for a change, and I know it’ll happen. You gotta have faith, and I’ve got faith.

 

We Can Only Imagine

We Can Only Imagine

We can only imagine how life will be tomorrow. We can never fully prepare for the war that awaits us, or the absolute joy around the corner. We can never imagine how our lives will change day to day, but what we find is ourselves loving Jesus for the promise at the end of the race. We have been promised the best gift of all and during the path to get there we will cry, we will laugh, but when we finally get home we will be in the aww of God, we will fall to our knees and sing praises to the one true King. We can only imagine what the greatness will be like, we can only imagine how eternity will be. We can only guess what tomorrow will bring, we can only imagine those who will hurt us. We can only imagine those who will fall before us, those will rise to the call and we only have our eternal hope in the Lord. What will you do with the one life we have? Will you use it to lift up those around you, or will you use it for your own personal selfish gains? Some people live only for themselves, they don’t care who they hurt. Some people live to hurt others, while some live to praise the Lord, give him all the Glory. Be one of those, be a lion amongst the lambs. Be a soldier by living in the light. Show others the grace and love. Don’t hurt others in the pursuits of your own happiness. Be that someone that God uses to bring joy and light to the world. Be that warrior be that example. Be the reflection to the best of your ability of Christ. Love like we were taught, forgive as we were commanded.

The Passage of Time

The Passage of Time

It’s amazing isn’t it how some days seem to fly by, but some days drag on? When you’re alone in isolation the clicking of that clock can seem slow, barely moving at all it seems. The perception concerning the times and the seasons, brothers, you have no need to have anything written to you. For you yourselves are fully aware that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night. While people are saying, “There is peace and security,” then sudden destruction will come upon them as labor pains come upon a pregnant woman, and they will not escape.” It’s hard for us puny humans to except that time is both linear and perceptive.

When time is so finite how do we manage it? When life is going great and wonderful what are we doing with the time we are given? When life is terrible and full of sorrow, how are we managing it? I myself sit at home and often feel low and down about my situation. Spending much of my time in non-voluntary solitude, I find that as long as I am using my time wisely, as long as I’m still doing God’s work, I can emotionally manage the struggle. Ecclesiastes 3:11 “He has made everything beautiful in its time. Also, he has put eternity into man’s heart, yet so that he cannot find out what God has done from the beginning to the end.” We are always so worried about getting stuff done, so worried about not having enough time to do everything in a day.

Have you ever thought about what happens when time runs out? Have you ever thought about when our time is up on this Earth, have we completed everything we wanted, have we live like we wanted too, have we seen the world, or did we squander the most precious gift we have, life/time. There have been many times in my life when I saw time slip by me, as the day should have turned into a forever sleep, but by the grace of God, time didn’t catch up to me on those days.

Some people are afraid of time. Some people are afraid to get older, but it’s been my experience that most of the time people who age also grow in wisdom. In many cultures to live to old age is to become a village elder. We should understand that time can be a friend. We often want time to go by more slowly, or more quickly, but what if we actually got to the point in our lives that we embraced exactly what time was for us because it’s God’s plan. James 4:14 “Yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes.” We cannot worry about tomorrow for time is fleeting. Time is not always a friend to us when we are alone, and scared. Rejoice in the great times we have. Proverbs 27:1 “Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know what a day may bring.”

 When we have companionship it seems time goes by so quick. The joy we have not being alone, being with someone we love, being loved in return. When that time has passed however, the time alone seems so long indeed. Being with someone for 10 years, then that time is gone, 7 months feels and seems like an eternity. The Lord teaches us patience, but it’s difficult. The nights feel like ages, reaching for someone that doesn’t exist anymore. The time it takes to recover from heartbreak is different for everyone, but how that time is spent is distinctive to each person. As for me in the past I’ve had friends to get me out of the house, take me out, introduce me to new people. This time however has not gone smoothly. 7 months I’m told is not a long time. How do they come up with that? How does someone assume to know what is or is not a long time for you? The perception of the passage of time largely depends on how we feel about the moment. There’s a difference between being okay alone, and wanting to be. There’s also a big difference in being single, and being alone. Most people have a vast number of friends there for them to get them out of the house, to help them heal. What if you don’t have that? What is 48 hours in isolation verses 48 hours of parties? When someone tells you their weekends went by too fast, do you judge them on their passage of time? When someone spends 48 hours in a cell for 48 hours do you tell him or her it’s not that long? Who are we to judge how someone should feel? Who are we to tell someone how much time should pass for them to be okay? Before you judge someone, before you pass advice, perhaps you should take the time and ask how they feel, get to know their perception, and try to walk a mile in their shoes. Maybe that mile might seem longer when you try to understand. It’s best to have compassion. Have a little companion for the suffering of others. Understand that sometimes the hurt goes deeper then you may know. Pain is a tricky thing, and the amount of time it takes for that pain to go away even the shortest of times to ‘you’ could be an eternity for someone else. Don’t judge what you don’t fully understand.

We may sit in isolation, or sit in a group of friends. No matter the situation and how uncomfortable or enjoyable it may be, know that God is in control and we are precisely where we need to be. Have faith always.

22 Veterans a Day

22 Veterans a Day

 On a daily basis there are 22 veterans on average in this country that commit suicide. The number of veterans who try per day is a number that’s not even known. Sadly the amount of people who die is vastly too many. Why is this an epidemic in our country? The life a veteran lives after the military is never an easy one. It’s full of pain, and loss, and a lack of self worth like few will ever know or understand. What kind of pain can someone feel that would be enough to override the simplest of functions, self-preservation? When the world beats us to the ground, when our value seems to go away the notion of self-preservation is the farthest thing on our minds.

Sometimes it’s a single trauma that can cause enough pain to force our hand. I’m not saying it’s ever right, but I do understand. When you feel you’ve lost everything you once held dear to your heart, everything in your life you rated as being who you were, that loss can be strong enough to wish it all away. As a soldier we are trained to do. We are trained to react and do so without feeling, without questioning the decision, so why not when it comes to our personal lives. The training isn’t like a switch you can turn on and off anytime you wish. What happens is sad, but true. When threatened the brain automatically kicks into fight or flight response. As a soldier our flight response doesn’t usually kick in it’s always fight and never stop fighting. When we feel as if the mission is done, and or lost, that flight kicks in. We are trained to avoid emotional attachments, so when something happens that’s extremely emotionally charged, we don’t know how to handle.

2 Timothy 2:4 “4 No soldier gets entangled in civilian pursuits, since his aim is to please the one who enlisted him.” This of course defines a big problem with today. Soldiers of today’s wars will go from war to home in a matter of a week. This is never enough time to decompress, to deal with the horrible things we face in war. When we get home and the real battle begins so few understand. We struggle to open up and let others know how we feel and what we think, sadly we often fail.

The true nature of the struggles is we just don’t know where to look. There are plenty of people who may not know exactly what we feel, but have struggles of their own. It’s not for us to push people aside. The mission isn’t over it’s just different. When we return, the mission is no longer to seek and destroy the enemy it’s to be there for our fellow brother and sister veterans. We must have faith that whatever battle we face, the battle will not be waged alone.

Psalms 46:1 “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.”

Help is all around us. There are people there who are willing to and want to help. If you’re a veteran and having financial troubles there are organizations to help. Facing PTSD there are places that help. It’s just a matter of using the resources that are there for you. Do not place your self worth on a temporary pain. When the mission doesn’t seem so simple anymore, when life seems bigger then we can take, we feel alone, realize we aren’t. What’s one soldier to do when life is so big? When the pain we face every day is a solitary one it’s more likely that we will loose the battle and sadly we can loose ourselves. The only truth that matters is we aren’t alone. The pain we face in basic training is only temporary. Sadly when one war is over and the next begins something about civilian life is harder to face. We feel as if the world no longer cares about us. We feel as if the problems will never go away, but the fact is they will and they do.

Joshua 1:99 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” God is always with us. As we may feel alone, we must not loose our faith. If we look hard enough God will always send someone to be there for us when we need it. God expects us to be proactive. God is not Santa Claus, things won’t be gift wrapped and left on the door for us. He will however give us exactly what we need, when we need it. Romans 8:38-39 “38 For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.” No matter the fight ahead, no matter the fight behind we have hope. There will always be hope as long as we remember where to look.

As for me, I know who my friends are. I know where my support is. In the last 8 months my close friends have come out of the woodwork to help me. My close friends have lifted me up, supported me, helped me, talked to me, hugged my neck, called me, written me, and have gone out of their way to help me change my future. I can never thank all my veteran friends, or tell them how much I appreciate or care about them. Faith in the future may not come easily for some, and some days that faith will be tested to the absolute max of it’s limits, but no matter what is going on, PLEASE reach out and let someone know if you need help.

You don’t have to be a victim anymore. Take control of your life and start to live again.

I’ve Got Your 6.

I’d like to dedicate this Blog to a few people very important to me. (Galyn, Tabby, Doc, Brian, David, Paul, David, Michaela, Thacker, Chelsey, Dustin, [just to name a few]) You know why your name is on here.

 

 

It’s Been A Long Road Getting From There To Here

It’s Been A Long Road Getting From There To Here

Most of you probably don’t know the song that title is from, ‘Where my heart will take me’. The song speaks of a journey, a long one but finally after a long time a breakthrough, and following your heart, and faith to achieve anything because of strength of that faith and soul.

Do we have faith like that? Do we have faith in God to grant us peace in the storm? Do we have faith that God will be our light in the darkness? Do we have faith that when we are down on our knees with no where left to turn God will lift us on the wings of Angels and give us reprieve from our assorted sufferings?

There’s so much in my heart that is full of pain, it’s full of doubt, its full of fear. Multiple times over I’ve faced death. I’ve seen death in the eyes, and I’ve overcome. I’ve seen RPG’s just barely pass by me. I’ve been caught in explosions, I’ve been shot, I’ve been just seconds from death. Every step every turn I’ve been protected by Gods hands. Because Christ lives in me I have managed to overcome. No matter the long road, the destination is beyond the stars. I pray my soul to find peace. I pray that because Jesus lives I will be saved of this pain and tomorrow the day of our salvation will hold true in my heart.

As I struggle with myself, it’s my own weakness. Faith in the Lord is a hard thing to keep. It isn’t the Lord part that’s tough; knowing that because of God I am safe. Because of God I am a free man. Because of God I am alive and the only thing that matters is His love. The world may beat me, the world may torture me, but it’s the life of Jesus Christ, a high price, but I am saved in that love.

The road I’ve traveled has been a rocky road full of pain and suffering. Days like today I struggle to maintain my positive outlook, but the truth is there’s no reason I shouldn’t be positive. Christ has Risen for me. Knowing that if Christ had to die for just me, he would have. A love like that should never go to waist.

As I have lost so much, as I have had to sacrifice so much, it’s never as much as our Lord sacrificed for us. When life does me wrong, keep moving forward. When trouble knocks at the door be sure to raise to the Lord your hands in prayer, and lift our weary soul to our Almighty God. Lift higher and higher to the Lord. We may never be worthy of Gods love, but we have it anyway. Put your own ambitions aside, God will provide.

No matter the road I’ve traveled, here I am, by Gods purpose, and Gods design. I’m here typing to show there is hope. Hope for tomorrow; hope for today because in all things darkness cannot survive the light. The darkness cannot snuff out the light, but the light will always overtake the darkness. Embrace the change of the light inside you. Let the Light of Christ fill your heart and let it change you. Be born again of the light. Even in the darkest of nights the stars will shine, and will guide your path. Look to the sky and see what’s written in the stars. The Lord gives us a sign and we must follow. The Lord will always say “Trust in Me.” So in the starlight, even the words can be seen when you know how to look.

Success Ratio

Success Ratio

 How do we rate our success in life? I used to think my success was in my career, my relationship, my GPA in college, but really I was only hurting myself in the long run. When those things are taken away what does that do to our psyche? For me when my world fell apart I fell apart. I put my faith in all the wrong places. Even as a good Christian boy I didn’t do what I was supposed to.

As I’ve gotten older my priorities have changed. Sadly, as I’ve gotten older the stakes have gotten higher. It’s hard to watch a life fall apart and have faith that tomorrow will be better. As many before me have struggled through life’s difficulties and challenges, I know that I too will not fail to make a new life for myself. I don’t pretend to know or understand the direction my life is going, but I do know no matter where it is my faith in God will be my guiding light.

No matter what hardship you’re having there are some scripture verses that help the wary heart.

Psalm 34:17 “When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears and delivers them out of all their troubles.”

 Proverbs 3:5-6 “Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

2 Corinthians 1:10 “He delivered us from such a deadly peril, and he will deliver us. On him we have set our hope that he will deliver us again.”

 No matter the troubles, no matter your peril, your shortcomings, the Lord will be with you every step of the way. If depression and anxiety are flooding your ship don’t go into battle alone. Reach out to others and find help. There is always aid; it just takes a little effort to find it. It isn’t a sign of weakness to ask for help, it’s a sign of strength. James 1:12 “Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.”

We measure our success by 1 Kings 2:3 “3 and observe what the LORD your God requires: Walk in obedience to him, and keep his decrees and commands, his laws and regulations, as written in the Law of Moses. Do this so that you may prosper in all you do and wherever you go” No matter how far we must travel, to Hell and back, remain steadfast in our faithful service to the Lord. Isaiah 41:10 “10 So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” Never give up. Sometimes we may loose, but it’s how we carry ourselves. Sometimes we may give up everything for the ones we care about, and that, is a measure of success worth fighting for.