Tag: hope

Don’t hide behind the wall

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Don’t hide behind the wall

 “Christians often want to hide behind the walls of the church, where we are comfortable, but sometimes we have to come out of the box.” Cheryl James

We as Christians are all afraid of something. Some are afraid to go and proclaim their faith at work. Some fear going abroad and putting themselves in situations that make them uncomfortable. What are we hiding behind? Do we build our walls to protect ourselves from life? I know a great many people who’ve been hurt in the past and they proclaim to the heavens, “I’m never dating again, I’m better off alone.” The truth is this statement is them putting up a wall and hiding from their pain, or pain they think might come if they come out from behind the wall they’ve erected.

Fear can push us to recluse ourselves to an extreme level. Some people who’ve been hurt curl up inside themselves putting up walls so no one can see them, no one can get close. Being hurt that bad from those closest to us, or those whom we love dearly isn’t new. Someone told me recently that, “being cheated on is apart of life, it happens.” Sadly she was right that it does happen. The area we disagreed on is the emotionless response. Anyone who goes through pain like that is owed their time to it. We are human and we have feelings. The important thing about that is making sure we only put up healthy defenses.

In Ephesians 6:16 “In all circumstances take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming darts of the evil one;” It’s important to know what to shield yourself from and what to let in. You can’t hide behind the shield all the time. Sooner or later you have to come out and breath the fresh air again. In the early church Christians hid in the Catacombs to teach and preach. Of course this is different when you’re hiding to preserve your life, that makes sense. Hiding to preserve the possibility of getting hurt, something in which may or may not happen is something many Christians need to work on. We all feel what we feel and we all handle differently. We cannot or rather should not judge how someone handles a situation, but rather as Christians help them so they can manage in a scripturally sound way.

Matthew 5:14-16 “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that[a] they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.” The light of the lord shines through and cannot be hidden. As is such your heart, your life, you cannot hide away your feelings and expect to remain safe. I am reminded of the Battle of Helms Deep in the second of the Lord of the Rings trilogy. The wall had never been breached before. King Theoden was confident that the wall would hold off the horde. He was confident that in all the years since it’s construction no one had ever breached the wall, and thus the plan was just to keep them off the walls and continue to hold them off. If we put our faith in the wall, that wall will eventually fail us. Saruman the white wizard found a weakness in the wall and once exploited the wall would never again be the same, a bomb of sorts placed in a small drain detonated and blew a 60-foot wide hole in the wall allowing the enemy to flood into the fortress.

If we think our walls are strong enough to hold out the world we are sadly mistaken. No wall we can ever create for ourselves is strong enough to withstand the onslaught of the Devil’s attacks. The only shield you can ever count on is that in which is built upon Christ. If we allow the Holy Spirit to cover us that’s the only wall we can ever count on. Even the Roman Empire’s walls as strong as they were eventually fell. Do not hide behind your own fear. Do not allow yourself to shut yourself in and hide away from the world. Only bad things happen when we shut everyone and everything out that loves us.

 

 

Don’t Be A Fair Weather Fan

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Don’t Be A Fair Weather Fan

We have all heard of the phrase fair weather fan. We realize that the term usually refers to sports of some kind, and always referring to sports where the team has a long streak of bad seasons and yet as soon as they turn around fans come out of the woods to cheer them on. But the moment the team goes south again the fans start to drop away. This behavior isn’t new and there is actually scripture to prove it.

As good Christians we are taught to follow God and to trust in God through every good day and bad. The truth is more Christians are like fair weather fans than devout followers of Christ. We look to God like a cosmic genie and only when things are going good do we look like good Christians. Sometimes when things go bad as long as it’s not “too” bad we treat God like Santa Claus saying “God if you get me outta this I’ll never do _________ again.” Of course they are usually empty promises. The truth is as long as the getting is good it’s easy to have faith, but when the day the troubles come we want the easy quick fix to make it better and when that doesn’t come we curse to the heavens stating how God’s forgotten us, or even worse that God never existed after all. Just like supporting your sport team when the are doing really well, but switching sides in the off years when things didn’t look so hot.

John 6:60-66 “60 When many of his disciples heard it, they said, “This is a hard saying; who can listen to it?” 61 But Jesus, knowing in himself that his disciples were grumbling about this, said to them, “Do you take offense at this? 62 Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? 63 It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh is no help at all. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. 64 But there are some of you who do not believe.” (For Jesus knew from the beginning who those were who did not believe, and who it was who would betray him.) 65 And he said, “This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted him by the Father.” 66 After this many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with him.” A little back-story for this longer verse is needed. Earlier in scripture Jesus had made sure to feed the great number of followers he had. After he crossed the lake and his disciples found him on the other side they wanted to go work for more food. This is when the nature of being a fair weather fan comes in. While the bellies were full everyone was happy, why not, they were getting free food, but when the message changed and it was no longer about getting the good stuff and easting some guys flesh and drinking his blood, a great many of them missed the point and in disgust decided to make like a tree and split. Jesus knew that in their hearts they didn’t believe and they didn’t truly follow. Knowing all these people would leave He Tested their faith anyway.

It’s easy for us to pass blame for the suffering of other; it’s easy for us to be angry at something bigger than us. Once we do that it makes the pain more manageable for some. Blame God, God’s the one who allowed this to happen. If God were so powerful then why would I be allowed to suffer like this? If we truly understood the nature of God, if we truly understand why bad things happen, and the true blame behind them, then we wouldn’t be so quick to flee from God’s side and remain loyal. Isn’t that a problem in today’s world though, loyalty? How quickly do marriages fall apart when it gets just a little rocky? We’ve become a fast food society that anything more than 5 minutes is unacceptable and we want to talk to the manager for lousy service. The problem with that is, the true manager is God, and we treat God like the guy at the check out counter.

God is with us every step of the way in our lives and by with us, I mean God endures each of our hardships we endure. God sacrificed ‘himself’ on the alter of self-sacrifice and we have the audacity to blame God when we stub our toe. Now I’m not saying that some problems are truly deep hurtful problems, but God is not the architect of bad days. 2 Thessalonians 2:7 “For the mystery of lawlessness is already at work. Only he who now restrains it will do so until he is out of the way.” Satan is the giver of all things evil. Satan was there the day evil entered the world, and will remain till the day God decides the time is right to vanquish evil from existence. Isn’t it better to stand with God in the fire, rather than stand apart and still be in the fire? Bad things will happen no matter what, and it’s a choice we must make as to where we want to be. The world is full of evil and yes God does allow it to happen, but sometimes we just need to let our kids learn life’s lessons the hard way. Sometimes horrible tragedies occur but that doesn’t mean that some good can’t come out of it. The key is knowing that God’s always working behind the scenes and those who are faithful will be rewarded for that faith.

“Moral evil is the immorality and pain and suffering and tragedy that come because we choose to be selfish, arrogant, uncaring, hateful and abusive.” Romans 3:23 says “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” (Andy Rau, Bible Gateway) The author of this blog entry touches on the Aurora movie theater shooting. The question was asked why them, why did so many have to die that fateful night, and the simple answer is because one man choose to do something evil. One person chooses to bring death to innocent people and the simple answer is Evil exists because of Satan. The Devil has been prowling around and causing problems since Adam and Eve. We don’t know why God has continued to allow this, but Jesus spoke clearly on pain and suffering, John 16:33, “You will have suffering in this world.” Jesus didn’t use the word might he was always very accurate in his choice of words. Will have suffering, and it’s our choice if we want to embrace our test and persevere, or if we want to struggle and fail. We may not always pass every test, or come out smelling like roses on the other side, but we have a choice to follow God and trust in God with everything we are, or we can come and go, treating God like a genie who is there for our own personal uses and amusement, though I promise you, if you believe God to be there for you because you feel you’ve earned it in some way, you’ve got another thing coming. Your sins are no more or less than those who drove the nails into the hands and feet of Jesus. You mine as well done it your self because we aren’t any more or less worthy of forgiveness then they were. We are not the judge and jury, and we don’t have the ability to know or see the whole picture. We are but tiny little insects in the grand scheme and because of that, we don’t deserve Gods grace or forgiveness yet we have it anyway. We should be humbled by our gifts, learn to find the good through the muck of the bad and focus on the blessings rather than the curse. Don’t flip flop sides when it’s convenient, search your heart and know that being on the side of Christ is the only side to truly choose from.

God,

Please forgive my sins and my arrogant presumptions of what life should be like,

Please allow me but a moment to see through your eyes and know that my troubles will be short, but if they are long give me your patience to wait them out. Give me your strength to persevere with you by my side.

Please give me the heart of loyalty that even when the times get the worst I can turn to you and know you are there waiting for me.

Lord please show me the blessings that I cannot see through the blinding of this storm.

Lord please grant me the wisdom to be there for others who are in need of a friend to help bare their cross, and help them see the good that’s still within this world.

Above all Lord, thank you for being by my side when the world is not, and thank you for walking with me when there is loneliness in my heart, and thank you for never giving up on me, even when I’ve given up on myself.

Amen.

Would You Love Me If I Was Broken?

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Would You Love Me If I Was Broken?

A few days ago I was listening to a song by Matthew West called Broken Things. When I listened to this song I started to wonder why anyone would love me. I started to question my future relationships and question why anyone would want me with my baggage I carry. There’s a line in the song that stuck out to me,

“That it’s never the perfect; it’s always the ones with the scars that You use It’s the rebels and the prodigals; it’s the humble and the weak The misfit heroes You chose Tell me there’s hope for sinners like me”

 If my baggage is heavy then I need to learn to let it go. It’s not about the relationship with another person; it’s about the relationship with God. If you have pain, if you have scars, those are the people God uses the most. If God can use you because you let Him, then it’s only a small step to think you will be blessed for it. If you can use those scars and that bit of baggage to glorify the Father then someone out there will accept you baggage, scars, pain and all. The only truth that should remain is through God all things are possible. The God of peace and love loves us even when we are bent and broken. We can’t be expected to walk through the fire and not get burned. Walking in the life of Christ is burning away our old self and forging a new one. This process is painful and will leave scars, but the scars tell a story. That story is our testimony to how great God is.

You can meet 100 people and in those 100 people you may not find one person that sees you for you but only the pain you carry. We all have our burdens, but when the time is right God will give you someone to help you pick up that cross. God loves us no matter how bent or broken we are, and God will use you just as God uses horrible things for Good. The day of peace will come but not on this world. The world shall pass away and Heavens gates will open to those who followed. I think of dating and looking for that person to complete us like Thomas Edison’s comment on the first incandescent light bulb. “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”

While some people will see your scars and might get scared off because of them, someone, the right someone, will look at your scars and see how you’ve endured despite them. If you’re like the Heath Ledgers Joker and your scars made you absolutely crazy, then perhaps that’s a different topic for a different blog, but if your scars have built you up to be stronger in your faith, given you hope for the future, and taught you valuable lesions to help others around you, those are honorable traits. Even the broken deserve someone to love. Even when the world around you feels like it’s falling down God’s with you always and that’s the love that truly matters. When the time is right God will bless you with someone who would be willing to put in a little work to glue that cup together and will accept Christ above all else. Don’t give up hope, someone out there will love you and accept you even if you are a little rough around the edges. 1 Peter 4:19“Therefore let those who suffer according to God’s will entrust their souls to a faithful Creator while doing good.” 

“We want to avoid suffering, death, sin, ashes. But we live in a world crushed and broken and torn, a world God Himself visited to redeem. We receive his poured-out life, and being allowed the high privilege of suffering with Him, may then pour ourselves out for others.” ~ Elisabeth Elliot 
“Your most profound and intimate experiences of worship will likely be in your darkest days – when your heart is broken, when you feel abandoned, when your out of options, when the pain is great – and you turn to God alone.” ~ Rick Warren

 You may feel broken, but God loves you just the same. God loves us the scars and all. Have faith and know that God will bless you, for He blesses those who remain faithful. Your days of fire may not be over, just know that even in the fire God’s with you being burned along side you. That’s Love, that’s what our love for one another should be.

 

 

Satans Web

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Satans Web

Some days the world is against you. Some days everything goes wrong and you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. When the world around you changes, and those whom you care for most turn their backs on you, the strong will survive and those who have faith in God will survive and thrive. It’s never too late to turn back from the path you’re on, never too late to fall to your knees and ask God for forgiveness. Never to late to follow Christ. Living is not for the weak. This has been my crucible and I shall grow the stronger for it. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil, for the Lord is with me. I will not be caught in Satan’s web, not this time.

The Right Place At The Right Time

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The Right Place At The Right Time

This morning I woke up a little before my alarm and decided to get out of bed instead of snoozing a little longer. I got ready and left 20 minutes earlier than normal. I wasn’t more then 10 minutes from the house when I saw headlights in front of me flashing at me. I could see debris in the road and that’s when I saw the car upside down. I pulled over as soon as I could, grabbed my duty belt and ran to the car. The woman who flagged me down was on the phone with 911. I had my flashlight and I started to search for the driver, but they weren’t in the car anymore. I franticly searched the surrounding area and that’s when I saw a man lying on his back in the grass. He was bleeding from him nose, mouth, and several other places of exposed skin. At the time he looked as stable as he could be so I knew not to touch him or move him. You could see he was breathing so that was a good sign. As I realized the 911 dispatcher could get a name using the plate I asked the woman to let me talk to 911. I gave the plate number and that’s when I saw it, in the backseat under the crushed metal of the SUV an infant car seat. My heart fell to the floor as I choked out what I saw to the dispatcher. I handed the phone back to the woman and began looking for a possible infant somewhere in the huge field the car crashed in to.

After a little while of searching the field I returned to the man and found his breathing had changed. He became erratic and it almost sounded like a bit of gurgling coming from his chest. It wouldn’t surprise me if he broke a rib and deflated a lung in the impact. The car from what it looked like impacted about 100 feet away or so against the fence and the embankment and flipped, eventually hitting the fence again in another spot, and flipped once or twice more before impacting the tree where the vehicle settled on it’s roof. The man was roughly 20 feet or so from the vehicle, surprisingly still breathing. The woman and I could hear the sirens now and as the deputy was the first on scene I flagged him down. Within a minute later the ambulance arrived. I left my flashlight on the fence providing light for them to work. As he started to move around a bit, I held is head in place and waited for the paramedics to get all the trauma gear they needed. When they arrived they took over and I went to help the deputies search the field more for the possible injured child.

After 45 minutes on scene the man was long gone as cleanup started. The woman and I waited for the State Troopers to arrive, which sadly didn’t happen before I decided to leave and come to work. I know I was in the right place at the right time, I know that all the mud on my pants and boots tell a story. I know that God placed me right where I needed to be and when. Today I had Gods eyes to see what I needed to, and his Heart so I had the compassion to stop. I had my duty belt with me and I had the gloves, flashlight, everything I needed for the day. God wants us to listen to that little voice in our heads to do something. I left for work 20 minutes earlier than I usually do and now I realize why. Are we listening to the Holy Spirit in our lives? Are we going where we are driven to, listening to that little voice inside us to allow ourselves to be used for the good of Gods will? Galatians 5:25 “If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.” We must listen for the voice, listen for the word. Psalm 25:4-5 “Make me know Your ways, O LORD; Teach me Your paths. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, For You are the God of my salvation; For You I wait all the day.” Our souls can catch the fire, the fire rises in us and we are consumed by the Holy Spirit, and we know we are walking with God.

We never know why something happens the way it does, but we know that in all things God’s working for our good even if we can’t see it. Praise God in the greatness of the day, and the sorrowful of the night for we are never alone.

Safe Journey

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Safe Journey

A close friend of my, my Pastor left on a trip to Europe, and this just after two terrorist attacks in Europe, the UK to be specific. This reminded me of the story so often played out in the Bible, the New Testament to be exact. Luke 4: 28-30 “All the people in the synagogue were furious when they heard this. They got up, drove him out of the town, and took him to the brow of the hill on which the town was built, in order to throw him off the cliff. But he walked right through the crowd and went on his way.” Jesus knew when it was time to go, and time to stay. Jesus was well aware of his surroundings, and we could learn a thing or two.

No matter where we go, or what we’re doing we know that God is always with us, so the scripture says. If the journey is long and dangerous which it is, then it looks like Jesus is the muscle, our bodyguard, our protector. Matthew 6:25 “Therefore I say unto you, Take no thought for your life, what ye shall eat, or what ye shall drink; not yet for your body, what ye shall put on. Is not the life more then meat, and the than rainment? This verse goes on to say all things will be provided to the faithful, and worrying about the day or tomorrow doesn’t actually give you any more ability or power to change the outcome. You can worry about being taller all day long, but that doesn’t mean you will get taller. Psalm 23:4 The Valley of the Shadow Of Death, yet peace and comfort come.

I’ve traveled a lot of places in my 33 years on this world. I have had good and bad travels. The closest I ever came to death or at least as it appeared from where I was standing, or better put nearly falling, was returning to Camp Junction City in Ar-Ramadi from my R&R in Qatar. We were in a C-130 headed for Baghdad. There was a sandstorm while we were supposed to land so we circled for a while. At some point the decision was made to send us back to Qatar, but we needed something first, fuel. The mid air refuel wouldn’t take too long once the plane arrived with two F-16 escorts. The sandstorm was getting pretty bad from what we were told. Just after the fueling process was over we started to turn to make our way back to Qatar. When the F-16’s broke off to head back to where they came from apparently one of them suffered severe engine failure and began to crash. The pilot ejected and was later recovered unharmed. As for us we returned to the bright and sunny island where I’d spend another week before a second transport attempt. On the second trip to Baghdad we were carrying a slew of gym equipment. This time when we reached the City we circled because there was a good bit of firefights around the area we were supposed to land. We’d been circling for a bit when we decided to stand and walk around the plane. Without warning the plane banked hard to the starboard side. My feet went out from under me and I reached up to grab the piece of equipment that I was hopping was safely secured to the deck plate. One of the guys wasn’t so lucky and he hit the bench and the wall of the plane. He screamed he was all right though so not to worry. We leveled off and the pilot told us to get back to the seats and hold on tight. We started to nose dive and the pit of your stomach flew straight into your throat. We leveled out again and without any notice the landing gear dropped and seconds later we were back on Iraqi soil. Once we landed we received word the reason for the drastic and violent course changes was because we were taking fire. The pilot told us it was small arms fire but still following procedure, no one was seriously injured. Our trip came to an abrupt end, but it ended safely.

We realize that in our walk with Christ we aren’t always going to be safe. We realize that sometimes that safety is only an illusion, because in Christianity we may be called to go places where it’s not safe, where being a Christian is still punishable by death. We don’t have to worry about that here in the United States, however, what we have might be far worse for our walk with Christ. We have the world. The world as we know it is corrupt and evil. The world tries to get us, it tries to get us to sin in all different kinds of ways. The world wants us to fail, and the attack on our souls in the US might be worse than the attacks on our bodies in some of the other countries. We have our ways to protect ourselves but only if we carry it with us in our hearts, that’s the word and Holy Spirit of God. When we go out into the world to proclaim the name of Christ we need to keep our wits about us. We must be careful because the Devil slithers around seeking for his next target.

Each and every one of us in on our own journey, our own path, running our own race and at every step of that race there can be an obstacle for us to face. The race is not a sprint, but a marathon for us that will take endurance and patience. 2 Timothy 4:7 “I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith.” How will you finish your journey, will it be strong, pushing yourself, or will you fall and give up on yourself? God won’t give up on you, so you shouldn’t. You’re stronger then you think you are, and if our God is for us, who then can be against us?

God the Abba

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God the Abba

Growing up I never had a dad in my life. It wasn’t in cards for me to be blessed with a father on this earth. For years and years that bothered me and I found myself jealous of others who had good relationships with their fathers. The nature of growing up without a father plagued me for many years. Today being father’s day I have had the distinct privilege to listen to my best friend preach about the greatest father of all, God. 1 Kings 2:1-3 When David’s time to die drew near, he commanded Solomon his son, saying,2 “I am about to go the way of all the earth. Be strong, and show yourself a man,3 and keep the charge of the Lord your God, walking in his ways and keeping his statutes, his commandments, his rules, and his testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and wherever you turn,” David was many things, a great leader, a great King, a great man of God, but in one area he failed was being a good family man. He wasn’t a good father, and he wasn’t a good husband.

For some of us God is more than just a being of enormous power and divine love. For me God has become so much more, but the term father means so much more. Mark 14:33-36 “33 He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. 34 “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,” he said to them. “Stay here and keep watch.” 35 Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hourmight pass from him. 36 “Abba,[a] Father,” he said, “everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.” Jesus explained how deeply troubled he was as he was facing his choice to go through as the sacrificial lamb for the fate of the entire world. Christ knew above all that God was more than just God, but our Father in heaven. For me God shall always be Abba.

In 2010 I met a man, a great man of God who would continue to inspire me, guide me, and help me grow in my faith of God. I spent 26 years without a father and that day ended when I met my future father in law. After 7 years that would end abruptly as I would watch that family be ripped away from me. Through all this I found a renewed faith and a special relationship with God. As I spent my life with God in all that time I never found a relationship like the one I have now. We never know how or why things work the way they do, but one things is certain our father is always working even if we can’t see it to turn tragedy into miraculous. Abba gave us the rules of the house and we are commanded to follow. In the event we break the rules know that Abba will give us a good old-fashioned butt whooping. Every good father knows when to comfort, knows when to lead, knows when to discipline, but in all moments of our lives Abba is with us. No matter the sorrows we face in this world, Abba will hold us, be with us always.

To all the dads out there be more then biological fathers, be real dads. Teach your kids in the ways of the Lord, teach them in the ways of being a good Christian. To all the dads out there be special to your children; be special to the people that look up to you. Be a good dad, a good father.

 

 

A Past Long Forgotten, The Dangers of Compartmentalization

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A Past Long Forgotten, The Dangers of Compartmentalization

I’m sure most people have had at least one trauma in their life that sticks with them, if not more than one. If you’re like me, the Devil just loves to stick around and try to make life a tad harder than it needs to be. One thing I’ve noticed is the minute changes that come about after every trauma takes place. When you’ve become so consumed with the trauma that you are forced to find anyway you can handle it, a common way for kids to handle, or at least myself was compartmentalization. When it comes to trauma big and small this is a safe way to handle it in the moment. However, if not revisited this method of handling can be very dangerous. Websters defines compartmentalized as “to separate into isolated compartments or categories” In many cases this is the event, and the emotion surrounding the event and are stored inside the brain as separate memory engrames. Once the memory is separated it’s difficult to reconnect the two, and it’s more so when the laps of time is greater. So what happens when you do this throughout a lifetime, say, 30 years? Lets think of memories as boxes, now think about each box as a memory, but the painful ones divide into two boxes and sit them on the shelf in the closet. Over time that closet is going to start to get full. When the closet reaches a certain point, all it takes is one massive event, and everything in that closet can come bursting down on top of you burying you in all the negative feelings you tried so hard to subdue or hide. So now you are lying on the floor, you have boxes everywhere, the emotions are like a zoo full of escaped wild animals, how do you plan on wrangling them up, and putting them back? The truth is, you don’t. The time at this point has past and now a new way of storing them is needed.

Often times when the emotions from traumas are released in such an uncontrolled manner the outcome is less than desirable. The effects can be quite frankly catastrophic. Often we see this as the beginning to self-destruction. An individual can go through several possible outcomes to include, self harm, harming others, drugs or substance abuse, addictions of other kinds such as work, gambling, adrenalin seekers, or other forms of risky behaviors. This is the common way for someone who’s accidently had Pandora’s box opened who didn’t have the right guidance to handle it. People don’t usually ask for the box to be pried open, sadly, it’s just one of life’s unfortunate circumstances. The key, once it’s opened is to know what to expect, and hopefully have someone around who can help guide you through the path of recovery. There are 4 basic paths to dealing with trauma. They can be found and studied here.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200111/recovering-trauma

The example that best correlates with compartmentalization is the Tsunamis. During the time you have lived on by not feeling, as it’s described in the Psychology Today article your nervous system is a circuit bored and in the event of a catastrophic traumatic event your system shuts down. There’s a dangerous time frame here between the event, and the waters receding. It’s in that short period of time that some will fall into the self-harm stage. It happens so fast that spectators rarely realize there’s a problem until it’s too late.

The truth is, as a Christian nation it needs to be better about standing with our brothers and sisters in times of great struggle. It’s sometimes hard to do especially when we don’t always know or understand the nature of what’s going on underneath the water. Some people, myself included often look like a duck on a pond. Floating around, no cares in the world, however if you look under the water, those little flipper feet are going a mile a minute. The iceburg is much larger underneath than what we see on the surface. Since we never know someone’s breaking point we must assume that during events that are hard to handle we look at them objectively and try to remain unbiased. A few life changing events that some would seem as bad things but not traumas are what we will look at for a moment. Loosing your job, loosing a spouse to either death or an unwanted divorce, loosing a loved one, car accidents, and sometimes slightly worse events. These things to some people may seem horrible, but to others, they can be the straw to break the camels back. As that may often be the case it’s better to error on the side of caution and overly loving in the hopes there are no residual feelings that could move this into a catastrophic event.

The dangers of being wrong: What if your friend or spouse goes through one of these events and notices you aren’t there for them, or you downplay how they are feeling. If we don’t show them that we care, and if we pass a negative judgment on their situation we may actually be contributing to the further decline of their mental stability. It’s important to always try and be supportive. We all handle situations and stress differently based on the culmination of our backgrounds and what we’ve learned in the past. If you are a young man and you get harassed every day by the police, eventually you will grow to fear them, hate them, avoid them, even though they are only there to help, the behavior is a learned trait. If you are bullied your whole life and you grow up and have self-esteem issues, self loathing, fear of rejection, or abandonment, those fears, those traits are learned traits. They come from a lifetime of experiences that tells us how the world is, even if it’s only our version of the truth. Getting back to the point, when bad things happen, we don’t honestly know how someone will react. That’s why it’s so important to follow Galatians 6:2 “Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ.” We shouldn’t hesitate to help even with the small stuff. Show compassion and be there if someone needs you. Ephesians 4:32 “And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.” We’ve been given such grace and love and forgiveness by God we are asked to pass that along to our fellow brothers and sisters of humanity. 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.”

If you’re struggling through tough times, if you have old trauma’s that are weighing you down, or if you just feel you need to talk, seek out Godly and or professional advice. Don’t try to get through this life on your own. There’s no shame in asking for help. Not asking for help is prideful, arrogant, and perhaps even a hair selfish. By not dealing with the issue when it’s small, it can grow inside you like a cancer, spreading throughout your thoughts and feelings, until one day it’s beyond repair. Seek help, trust in the Lord that you will be watched over no matter how light, or heavy the storm is.

The Glitter In Your Head

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The Glitter In Your Head

When we experience a trauma, or a lot of stress in our lives sometimes our minds feel like a jar of glitter. If you’ve ever looked at a snow globe after it’s shaken that’s how our minds get sometimes. The key is to remember that after you shake it and shake it, no matter how hard or soft you shake it the glitter always settles back to the bottom. Our minds are the same way. No matter how hard you shake it; no matter how bad a situation is in the moment the glitter will settle. We have to remember that although we can’t see the center of the jar once it’s shaken, is like us not being able to see out once our jar’s been shaken. But no matter what, we can see the outside in time.

God loves us, and promises us that we will go through suffering in our lives, we will be faced with trials, and sometimes really bad things happen to us. “Loves never met a lost cause. Mercy says you don’t have to jeep rubbing down the road you’re on.” (Casting Crowns) No matter what happens Jesus will always be walking beside you.

A few years ago (more then a few) I was on a mission in Iraq. During that mission my wingman truck along with my own were drawn into a well planned insurgent ambush. I can remember clearly seeing the very large IED (Improvised Explosive Device) on the side of the road just feet from my door as we drove by it. It was only moments later I saw in the distance as the truck in front of me, my friends, my brothers where gone in the smoke from two explosions. The whole situation seemed so surreal it was hard to imagine the truth of what was happening that very moment. I remember thinking why am I here; it only lasted but a fleeting second. The sound of pop, pop, pop, in the distance, and less then a second later I could see a puff of dust on my hood. Still driving with only one hand I heard the metal on my door take an impact. In my head I thought, ‘were really being shot at’. The sound of the Mk-19 above me started firing. Both hands on the wheel I focused on the road. The calm that surrendered over my body, the warmth that filled my hands, the ease in which the thoughts came as to where I needed to go, what I needed to do. The hand of Jesus Christ was on me that morning. While some may claim the peace and calm was all the training I respectfully disagree. Although our training was fantastic I don’t think any amount of training can prepare you for the first time you experience combat, when someone else, or a lot of someone’s is actively trying to kill you. Think about that for a second. In all your life have you ever had someone attempt to kill you, actually shoot in your direction with such hatred and malice they wanted you to die? I’d be willing to bet the overwhelming answer is very few. As one IED after another was detonated, and several RPG’s were fired and just barely missed my Humvee, I could feel the change in the wheel. We’ve lost tires, I didn’t know it yet, but by the end we’d loose 3 of our tires, each were shredded from the bullet and RPG shrapnel. Later I’d learn that the tanks were hit that stored the oil, the power steering, even my wiper fluid reservoir was damaged. As soon as my foot came off the gas the truck died, and wouldn’t start again for weeks. Gods grace allowed us to exit the combat zone alive and uninjured.

Peace was with me; the calming affect was beyond words. Because of the grace of God I was able to keep my wits and calmed the storm that should have been going on inside. Keeping your wits about you is a hard thing to do sometimes. 2 Timothy 1:7 “For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.” We shall know God by faith, not by sight. We shall know peace by grace, not hate. Matthew 5:44 “But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;” We shall know protection like we can’t imagine. This life we live is fleeting, only but a moment, a vapor of smoke that disappears quickly. James 4:14 “14 whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.” Above all no matter where you go and what toils and troubles and trials you face know that the Lord of all is with us, watching us, protecting us. Isaiah 43:2  “When thou passest through the waters, I [will be] with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.”

Remember your life as a glitter jar, and no matter how shaken you are, find peace and comfort in the Lord. Find a way to steady the ship, calm the storm, and let the snow globe settle in your mind. The next problem will be just around the corner, make sure you’re ready for it when that day comes.

The Rain

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The Rain 

My tears fall down and the river stains the paper. Like the rain I I’ve fallen down. The rain brings rejuvenation . The desert so dry and barren where very little lives and even less survives. The rain brings back life. The tears that fall mark the end of one and the beginning of another. My tears dry and the floods come no more.

The rain that comes soft and slow, and other times fierce and loud. My tears are the same, but my tears flow no more. They flow not of sadness and loss for myself, but remain for the sorrow felt for you. The fear of what God will do, the fear of what God thinks now. I cry of fear because of love. I cry for fear because God’s vengeance is just. Deuteronomy 32:35 “35 To me belongeth vengeance and recompence; their foot shall slide in due time: for the day of their calamity is at hand, and the things that shall come upon them make haste.” I do forgive and my tears let go. Like the end days I know that the time has come. Revelation 21:4 “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” My time for the flood has gone, the sorrow washed away by the endless flow of the river of tears. For now I know that the future is littered with prizes, the prize of love offered by my Lord. My flow of tears is to save your soul, and to pray and pray. I loved and a promise I shall keep. I shall never forsake you, and though the river is now wide, my prayers will always transcend. Psalms 126:5 “They that sow in tears shall reap in joy.”

My tears shall fall, but not for me, they fall for you. No boat shall cross for the time has come to move beyond. I bid farewell as tears fall down, the hills and valleys watered by my past sorrow. I see the sun rise and dries up all the rain. The sun rise will free from the storm and the storm now subsides. The Son risen saved my soul. The shadow of the cross covers me like a blanket and now I can see. I can see everything that I was missing. I can see that God covered me the broken hearted. The darkness cannot snuff out the light, oh no, the lights power revealed the hidden places in my heart and now the Lord has revealed to me the truth. No longer do my tears fall, no longer does the rain descend upon me.