Tag: hope

The Veteran

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The Veteran

No matter the politics, or which side of the fence you sit on, the veteran serves this country. The constitution that all of you Americans enjoy the freedoms given, was paid for and continues to be paid for by the veteran. No matter what you’re faith, your heritage, respect for out veterans that gives us the protection we so appreciate. It is by the blood we have the greatest gift we could ever hope for. Beyond our beloved country we have the kingdom of Heaven we fight for. I am a United States veteran of foreign wars but beyond that and more importantly I’m a veteran of this spiritual war we fight daily. I am a soldier for CHRIST AND I’M THANKFUL TO CALL MYSELF A VETERAN FOR GOD.

Just as veterans shed blood for our freedoms, Christ’s blood was shed for our sins, Hebrews 9-13-14“For if the blood of bulls and goats and the ashes of a heifer, sprinkling the unclean, sanctifies for the [b]purifying of the flesh, 14 how much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit offered Himself without [c]spot to God, cleanse your conscience from dead works to serve the living God?” While there is no more blood needed to be sacrificed, the continuing war rages on and we are on the front line of an invisible war, that we cannot see, but we feel the effect every day. Satan and his demons interfere in our human affairs, but no matter the day, Christ still sits at the right hand of the father on high, and we are always on the winning side. Freedom always takes blood, and blood with no spots was shed for you and me, and all those before, and all those to come after. How wonderful it is to know the army of saints in which I fight for. God, Jesus Christ is the greatest general of all time. Jesus Christ’s war plan is perfect, and we soldiers of Christ shall fear not for we know the way the story ends. We shall not fret over the lost, and do not cry for saint’s who’ve fallen in the name of the Lord who were beautiful soldiers who live for the Lord, instead rejoice and be glad in their new home seated in front of the father in Heaven. Be grateful for the saints who’ve been slain in the fight against darkness, for they are at peace now. I shall not fear the evil for I know who art with me who protects me. Psalm 27:1-2“The Lord is my light and my salvation; Whom shall I fear? The Lord is the strength of my life; Of whom shall I be afraid? 2 When the wicked came against me. To eat up my flesh, My enemies and foes, They stumbled and fell.”

I fought a war of men, and now I fight a war, waged in the spiritual. We sacrifice by picking up our cross and letting go of this world. Much like picking up a weapon giving up a life at home with families, soldiers prepare for battle, rush into danger and fight the war. The sacrifice is never in vein and we shall be blessed for more than we could ever hope for. Stay focused on our General and trust with every breath we take until the last. We will be rewarded for fighting the good fight, and finishing the race.

Every Contingency

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Every Contingency

As I have spent the last few months preparing for my mid December hiking trip, I have come to realize one very important factor that I am not in control over my destiny. I have tried to plan for every contingency, and the most I plan, the more carefully this plan is thought out, the words of Lenard Snartrun through my mind, “Make a plan, execute the plan, expect the plan to go off the rails, throw away the plan.” How true this statement is, not just for clever heists of Argus held technology, but in all of life. I have tried to think of every contingency, every minor detail of emergency I can think of, but when it comes down to it, I am not in control. Yes, there is a measure of free will, and yes, I am choosing to do this hike, and I am chosen where and when, but in my heart I know God has laid this trip on me for a reason, and I will go with an open heart to hear what God has to say.

 

One does not build a tower without first counting the cost. You do not build without a plan, and you cannot succeed in war without first being prepared for battle. I do not claim to know all that will happen, but I go humbly before the Lord the one who made the woods, and the mountains, and I ask for guidance and clarity and peace along this planning and execution phases.  James 4:13-17 (NKJV)13 “Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit”; 14 whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. 15 Instead you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we shall live and do this or that.” 16 But now you boast in your arrogance. All such boasting is evil. 17 Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin.”

 

While I don’t pretend to know everything, I do think God gives us the ability to think logically and with the gift of intelligence we are able to take in information and process it and we formulate solutions based on the data we have at the time. We aren’t always right and we don’t always use every bit of information we may have available to us, and we may not always come to the right conclusions, but when we walk with God, when we ask ourselves every day what would Jesus do, we are far more likely to get it right, far more often.

 

As I have planned for bad weather, small injuries, fire, food, warmth, wet, wild animals, water, and not just for me but for Riley also, I understand there will be things I will find on the trail I didn’t need, or things I wish I had, but even if this trek in the woods turns out to be a failure then I will learn from that failure and I will do better the next time.

 

A lot of people have asked me why I would be willing to, or even want to do a trip like this, and the answer I have often given seems to be an over simplification, and the true, deeper answer is far more complicated. Death comes for us all, and I often wonder when my time will be. In the last two years I have faced death, and then a life changing back surgery. In that time I have often looked at my life and questioned what I was to learn, what I was giving up and loosing in all of this. I was so focused on what I lost, that I couldn’t see what I can gained. I have gained perspective and insight into a faith I didn’t know I could ever have. I would come to face my past and be forced to dissect it in order to truly heal. I have loved ones I have lost and that I miss. One of my favorite quotes is ‘Living is not for the weak.’ It’s hard being on this side, but this side is important. As much as I miss my loved ones who’ve gone home, I try to keep my focus on the mission, the reason I’m still here. I try not to let my grief distract me from what God wants me to do. I remember that if it were my time to go Home God would take me, and he would have taken me two years ago when I nearly died, but I am still here, fighting the good fight. I do not pray for death, but I am prepared to meet death like an old friend when the time comes.

 

This journey is for me to focus on God, and regain something within myself I lost. This trip is for me to prove to myself that I can still do things I love, even if it’s different from before. This trip is for me to hear God more clearly, to focus on that relationship and get back to a simpler time. Faith is important to me, and knowing that my original route was canceled because the hurricane washed out the bridge, and then me finding the most perfect route I could have ever asked for, Marion to Damascus. The path to Damascus is a long, and difficult one, but much like Paul, the path is meant to be difficult, and even painful to pick away parts of me that I don’t need and make me more like Christ every day. Remember as you move forward in your life it’s good to make plans, to seek Godly counsel, but don’t be so rigid in your plans that you don’t leave room for God to change them. You have to know that the course we set according to Christ will always follow that North Star, but sometimes God sees fit to alter our course slightly and we can’t be upset when those course corrections come. When we realize we aren’t the Captain of our ship, we are more willing to let God be in control and realize we’re just along for the ride. Be wise and trust in God but don’t spend so much time worrying about life even though we are told to plan. It’s okay if God changes the plan because if God changes things for you, it means something better is coming, even if you have to go through the storm first.

A Month To Remind Us To Be Thankful

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A Month To Remind Us To Be Thankful

As we enter November we need to remember to count our blessings but not just in November but everyday, all year, and we must be willing to give thanks to God for all we have. We often have more blessings then we could ever count, and we are short sighted as to what that truly means. We have a small idea of what constitutes blessings, and we have such little faith in God it shows brightly in each of our lives.

 

We must be thankful for life, and not to grieve over death. Hope in Jesus in tomorrow and be thankful for the trials to make us more like Christ and to be thankful for shortcomings. Look at life and trust in God that you are blessed with if nothing else, the breath of life. Be thankful to be able to praise and worship a God who loves us dearly.

 

Look to God and find thanksgiving in the peace of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

 

Psalm 100

Make a joyful shout to the Lord, all you lands!

2 Serve the Lord with gladness;

Come before His presence with singing.

3 Know that the Lord, He is God;

It is He who has made us, and not we ourselves;

We are His people and the sheep of His pasture.

4 Enter into His gates with thanksgiving,

And into His courts with praise.

Be thankful to Him, and bless His name.

5 For the Lord is good;

His mercy is everlasting,

And His truth endures to all generations.

 

Look at verse 4 and 5, thanksgiving and in his court be thankful, meaning we must be thankful for a fair and just judge. God does not see the color of my skin, the ethnicity from where I come from, or the social class I ‘belong’ too. God sees the only thing that matters and that’s the heart. God sees my actions which are mine and mine alone, and God does not care about excuses. When I look at the fall when the serpent convinced Eve the fruit of the tree of knowledge would be okay to eat, God did not care the excuses Adam gave, and judgment was cast to all involved. We should expect the same treatment in our lives. We can be persuaded by a drug dealer to take drugs but that’s our choice to follow through. We can be convinced sex with someone other then our spouse is okay so long as no one knows, but trust that God see’s, and God knows, and judgment will come to all involved. I am thankful for the discipline I receive because I know that I have an Abba Father who loves me so much he takes time to care for me. Abba keeps me on the right track. I often forget what I have and I know I should be ashamed of myself living life in the dumps. I am not talking about the clinical, biological depression, but the pessimistic viewpoint of life I have lived in the past. It’s not often I fall into that place, but when it happens I should be ashamed at my weakness of faith.

 

I have more blessings in this life then many others, and when I find myself slipping into a defeated state of mind, I need to remind myself that there is more in this life that I have to be thankful for, even if it’s just the gift of life.

 

Going into November, what are you thankful for? Could you make a list of all your blessings? God sees us through all our storms, even when the storm rages on around us, and inside us. God only disciplines us when we need it, and we should be grateful that we have a God that cares so much for us to want only what’s best for us. Count your blessings big and small, and be sure to truly look at what you have.

Don’t Go To Sleep

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Don’t Go To Sleep

God comes to you in mysterious ways. We never know when the Holy Spirit will fall on you, and we certainly don’t know when the Lord will use you. I find myself perplexed as I have recently received validation that I am ‘wise’ and filled with the Holy Spirit. I never considered myself to be able to speak with authority on scripture, but twice in twenty four hours I have received such validation, and now the question has changed. I find it odd that God would use a man like me to do these works for Him. I wonder my strength to follow the will of God. I question my worth and value in this decision of God’s. I guess the closest person from scripture is Gideon. I know it’s not me that offers the change found, or the advice that comes from my mouth, I know it’s not me. I struggle taking any credit for helping, but at the same time, God gave me free will, and I could have very easily gone to bed. How often do we ignore the calling of the Holy Spirit and do what we want?

 

Judges 6:1515 “He said to Him, “O Lord, how shall I deliver Israel? Behold, my family is the least in Manasseh, and I am the youngest in my father’s house.”

 

Gideon tells the Lord ‘wait I think you have the wrong guy! I’m not strong, I come from the poorest tribe!’ The Hebrew translation for youngest is tsa`iyr or insignificant, and he means what he says. God however addresses Gideon as a mighty man of valor. What an honor for God to see such a wonderful quality in the youngest, and weakest of his brothers. God see’s the capability of a person, the truest potential that may not have been realized yet. God doesn’t make mistakes, and it’s in those times we are to humble ourselves before the Lord and trust and not question. When the Holy Spirit comes upon you, don’t ignore it.

 

We cannot fathom the impact we may have on a life if we just listen to that voice telling us the path to take. It would have been so easy for me to go to sleep, put off a conversation that it seems had major impact. The Holy Spirit guides and all we have to do is stop fighting for the steering wheel. What if Paul had decided he’d had enough after his first missionary journey? What if he decided he didn’t want to be beaten, or stoned anymore so he stayed home? What if he had decided he was going to allow fear to win over the instruction of God? Stand tall, and be full of valor of the Holy Spirit in your life. Don’t go back to bed when you are called to God’s work. Don’t allow laziness, or fear keep you from getting out of your comfort zone and going into the world we are called to be in to make real possible everlasting change.

 

God Won’t Leave

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God Won’t Leave

 

I wrote to you and you said stuff too. I fell for your lies and you left me feeling like a fool. How could I have not seen it earlier, instead I had to feel. You said you cared but then you were gone. How can someone care then disappear? I believed you and gave you my attention my ear as you lifted me up and told me a beautiful lie. I listened to you and fell for the line that wasn’t true at all. How often have I fallen for the same lie over and over in my life? The truth is sometimes hard to swallow, as I have now been smacked in the face with, you didn’t care about me at all, just about yourself and as soon as I didn’t give you a certain feeling, you left. How long I have looked for something real, someone truthful, and faithful, but have come up empty handed. Thankful I am that God doesn’t leave me the first time I don’t live up to his expectations. Thankful God’s grace and love are bigger then anything I could ever imagine. I am thankful that the God who created the universe loves me enough to lend me His ear, hold me when I’m sad, and never leaves me.

 

Isaiah 41:10 (NASB) ‘Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’”  God’s grace is something amazing and we often overlook it because we are too busy to count the blessings we have. I have had an all out yelling match with God, but I know He’s still there. He can take my faults and love me just as I am. As I watch one by one the majority of new people I have met have left and have done so without a word with their exit. God is my hero and knowing God won’t leave or forsake me gives me strength to carry on past the hurt.

 

I am a person, and I feel but it seems my feelings don’t matter much to the majority of people I have in my life. Thankfully God hears my heart and knows my feelings. I may not always get what I want, but God doesn’t set out to hurt me like other people do. People have forgotten the feelings of others, and it’s a sad day when close friends no longer show they care. Watching as people lie, and say whatever they want to try and get something is heart breaking. God though, doesn’t have to lie to get anything from us. Joshua 1:9“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

 

Dealing with the emotional fall out from so much disappointment, it’s hard to understand how this happens, but God will strengthen me, and I will watch as the purging wildfire continue to rages on in my life.

 

 

In Need

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In Need

My God, my God, I cannot do this alone. I try to swim but I get caught among the waves. We don’t always know how much, but we are always in need of your grace and mercy. I don’t often think about being in need of God in regards to all things in my life. We go through life and we hop in the car, we drive to work, or the store, or even to church, but we don’t often think how important our relationship with God is in even the smallest details of our lives. We take our lives and many aspects of that for granted. How badly we need God in our lives, and rarely take the time to thank God for all of the small things, yet when we need something we turn to God in a second.

Philippians 4:19 (NKJV)19 “And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” The text says God will supply all your need, not some, not just what’s convenient, but God gives us everything we need because we are loved as His children. If we are to be given everything we need from God’s riches, then we are getting the best of the best based on what we require. Which means, if we require a swift kick in the butt, it’s going to be a darn good kick. If we require a particular lesson, that lesson will be tailored to fit God’s plan.

I have often chosen my path and because of my own choices I have missed out on opportunities in which God has laid before me. When we consider that God waists nothing, and that has led me to wonder if my actions now had lined up with God’s plan. I often think that God gives us what we need, and that we have a choice what we want to do with the gift. We have in mind our own path, our own plans, and we obviously attempt to make the best decisions we can but we are human, and we don’t always the best choices.

Two years ago, I made a choice and that choice may have had a lasting impact on my life. I had someone come into my life, and I choose to walk away for my own reasons, but now two years later I have not been given a gift like that again. Did I slap away God’s gift, and tell God I could do what I wanted on my own? How many times does God give us a gift for our hearts, and we pass it by? What good is a gift if we never open it, or just leave it on the shelf? I have often felt in the last two years that I may have passed by my chance to happiness. I have often wondered if God would be gracious and give me another shot to get it right. We make so many choices everyday, and it’s impossible to know if we are always making the right choices but we have to be in constant prayer. When we look to the gifts God places in front of us, are we acknowledging them as gifts, or just random occurrences? Are we making life about what we want, or are we making our walk about God?

Every single day we breathe we must look at the changes in our life and ask ourselves what we can do to ensure we follow God. To do that we must be in constant prayer, we must vet where the gifts come form in our life, and realize there are gifts from God, and gifts from Satan disguised as gifts from God. Don’t be so quick to turn away from God in prayer. Don’t forget to look to God for all things big and small. We don’t always get gifts in life when we think we should, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t God’s perfect timing. Prayer in all things will help us along the right path. As for me, I know I need God because I don’t want to miss out on God’s blessings in my life. I want to be paying attention for the gifts when they come and not let them go because they don’t align with my own plans.

Keep Fighting

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Keep Fighting

 1 John 5:5 (NKJV)5 “Who is he who overcomes the world, but he who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?”

We fight this world tooth and nail every single day of our lives, and somehow we find a way to make it through. We never fully understand the source of our strength and we underestimate the importance of God’s will and gifts for each and every one of us.

We face our hopes in so many things in this life, but fail to keep our eye on the North Star. Jesus Christ is the life that was sacrificed in order to give us hope in more then just tomorrow, or next week, but hope in Heaven.

It’s not easy living in the world when it’s so easy to become lost in it. The ebb and flow of the world is designed to sweep us away in the flowing waters, yet as out of control as life may seem, the truth is, when we feel out of control in this world, that’s exactly what Satan wants. Satan wants us to forget about our Heavenly hope, and begin to worry about the every day problems here in this life. When we start to worry about our bills, our relationships, our jobs, our friends, our vehicles, even our own health, it can quickly add up, and much like the rising waters of a flash flood, we are no longer in control, not of what’s going on around us, but of our own thoughts and feelings. We are commanded to remain sober minded and in control of our thoughts and feelings, and when we allow ourselves to get swept away we are in violation of our commandments. What else is there to say except stop worrying about everything going on. Handle what you must, and take one thing at a time, trusting in God to be there with you, to help you through.

Trust in God and allow your star to shine brightly and cut through the clouds, the storm, and guide you no matter what happens or where you’re swept off too. Stay firm and guide yourself by the only hope we ever need.

Invisible

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Invisible

Colossians 1:15He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. Jesus Christ

Have you put thought in the true power of God? The creator of the universe in perfect harmony loves you. Jesus Christ walks with us every single day and is with us while we are on this journey of discovery. We often find ourselves feeling alone, and angry that we don’t feel God. We don’t always see God around us, and we don’t feel okay. See, when we look further in the letter by Paul we find more of the mystery of God. Colossians 1:16“For by Him all things were created, both in the heavens and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things have been created through Him and for Him.” God is so big, and so powerful, we underestimate the awesome power that we have in our corner.

I have walked through this life questioning my faith on occasion. It wasn’t so much a question of whether or not God was real, it was more of ‘Does God Care?” I’ve struggled with the amount of pain I struggled through, but when I think back, and knowing what I know now, the invisible God who’s everywhere, was with me the whole time. God promises never to leave or abandon us. There’s a war going on in the shadows all around us, and we are the targets of the enemy. This war that takes place invisible is not to be understated. The spiritual warfare that Paul talks about is very much real. While the characters are invisible the affects are as real as they come. The fallen angels that followed Lucifer now called demons help him lay the lure to see what fish they can catch. We are easily drawn to the world, sin is a powerful, attractive force. It can be very difficult to see sin for what it is and walk away. While the enemy is always trying to draw you out away from your protection, Jesus Christ is with you reminding you of the right path.

When you commit a sin and you feel that sense of emptiness afterwards, or that sense of shame, that’s the Holy Spirit filling you with conviction, reminding you what you did was wrong, and that you need to repent of your sins. We cannot see the Holy Spirit but much like the air we breathe it’s there, surrounding us all the time, we just have to take a moment away from the world and truly focus on the force that surrounds us, and flows through us.

The Devil’s affects are very real even though we can’t see him and his demons skulking around us. He wants us to forget that he’s not the only one in this world. Jesus Christ and the army of Angels protect over us. It’s hard to remember how gracious God is to us when we feel the suffering of this life. “You’re gonna suffer, but you’re gonna be happy about it.” (Prizinor of Azkaban) Ron says this to Harry about his tea leaves. The connection to scripture is very real, we are told we will suffer, and in Colossians 1:11 “strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy;” This life takes time to get through. And as I was once told recently the process of gold refinement is a slow process. The gold is heated as the impurities rise to the top, scrapped away, and then put back into the fire. Each time a little more of the impurities are scrapped away till eventually the gold is so shiny in it’s molten state the gold smith can see his/her reflection in the liquid. We are the same, that in every trial, in every struggle a bit more of the impurity is burned and scrapped away. If we are to live in Christ then we must allow those impurities to be removed. If Jesus is the gold smith we must allow ourselves to be put back into the fire so one day when he looks at us he sees his reflection in us. We may not be able to physically see Christ but his presence is clear. This life is but a fleeting moment in the prospect of eternity and if we are to join the angels, and God in perfection then we must be willing to allow the forging process to make us strong, make us shiny and new. When the pain is gone and the worry and doubts fade away the purest gold will be all that’s left in our hearts, and as we face judgment at the foot of the cross the final impurities will be washed away in forgiveness of our sins and we will be allowed to enter heavens gates, if we trust in Jesus, love him with our whole hearts, and believe in the process we must endure to get there. Our savior suffered for us, and who are we to think we shouldn’t have to suffer? As for me, I brace for each of the storms in this invisible but very real war for the souls of man. On that day I reach the gates of Heaven, I pray for two words from my Lord, “well done.” I can live with the suffering now to one day walk with Jesus in perfection.

Don’t give up on yourselves and trust in the refining process. I can’t help but not think of the song Hard Love by NEEDTOBREATHE. I’ve used that song many times in my writings, but it is so true. “It’s gonna hurt but don’t you slow down.” “It takes some time to make your courage strong.” It’s true that as long as you breathe there’s hope, but we cannot place our hope in this world, we must place our hope in Heaven, and our Savior that’s there preparing a place for us. There’s no hope in this life for this world, except that salvation awaits us. We are never promised and easy life, we are never promised peace while we breathe this air, but in Heaven our hope resides. No the process getting to Heaven isn’t easy because we have to first live this life, but what a worthwhile venture. I can take the beating, and the ridicule, and the pain because I know that one day Satan will no longer have dominion over the place I live. While I am here on this world, I know that Satan is spreading pain and suffering all around, but in Heaven the throne has God almighty and he loves his Children.

We may not be able to see the Holy Spirit, but we can feel it all around us. All we can do is ask Jesus to take our suffering and use it to glorify Him. Have faith in Christ, and give thanks to being alive another day, and doing work that will glorify the King. Heaven is worth the suffering of this life, and since God waists nothing, we can always find good in the trials we go through, we just have to look for them. Change your perceptions and give thanks for the opportunities to praise Jesus, and draw closer to God in the fire. Never give up hope because our hope is not in this world,  but in the Heavenly home.

 

 

Of Course I’m Angry

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Of Course I’m Angry

The world has been unkind. It’s been cruel and without fail the wolves come and attack by night. The enemy has burnt down my castle, and has taken nearly everything I’ve held most dear, more than once. I was angry as a kid with no where to put it. The anger stayed inside and the gauge continued to rise without a relief valve. That angry kid internalized so much but instead of being angry it turned into self-loathing. I believed for so many years being angry was a bad and wrong thing of me. I felt as if my anger was viewed as a weakness, and I didn’t have any good reason to be angry. The truth is I had every right to be angry, and as normal as anger is be it’s important to know how to manage that anger. Where do we direct our anger when it comes? Do we store it inside for use later? I want to tell you a little story about someone who’s angry but it’s based on a selfish desire and what he did with his anger.

If you were Lucifer and you were angry at God for being banished from paradise and cast down to earth to roam unable to return home wouldn’t you be upset? Wouldn’t you hate God’s children that took so much attention from the Father? Whether the Angels were created as servants or children the effect is the same. Lucifer was created to be the most beautiful of all the Angels and his pride caused the rebellion and the fall. Attacking God’s children in Adam & Eve was a sure way to get God’s attention. Who is truly the angry one here? When you start feeling self-loathing, and anger, and hatred, who has the most to gain? Misery loves company, and if Satan, once the most beautiful of all God’s creations fell from grace never to return to perfection, that pride, that anger, that bitterness, no one wants to be alone. Satan draws you in to his own pain, and it’s not you, it’s him.

It’s Not Me It’s You

 Let’s get the story straight
You were a poison
You flooded through my veins
You left me broken
You tried to make me think
That the blame was all on me
With the pain you put me through
And now I know that it’s not me it’s you (you)

It’s not me it’s you (you)
Always has been you
All the lies and stupid things you say and do
It’s you (you)
It’s not me it’s you (you)
All the lies and pain you put me through
I know that it’s not me it’s you

 

Satan chose to be King of the earth rather than a servant in Heaven. He has a legion of fallen Angels at his side and his anger, and cruelty and malice spread across the earth as a plague. The enemy and the legions that follow are in every ear, every whisper, every discouraging comment, and all the route of a single act of sinful pride. As Lucifer fell his turn to the dark side became complete. Any good that may have remained in him turned bitter, cold, in essence he became the antitheses of God, which God’s complete power. God’s grace, and love, and mercy for mankind, Lucifer turned Satan held the antitheses of these things, malevolence, hatred, and cruelty towards mankind. The perception that Satan was able to do a better Job then God himself led Satan to betray God, which of course God knew from the beginning. An angry child throwing a temper tantrum is how I put it before. Lucifer once hailed as the definition of beauty, now scorched and his anger fuels the hatred and rage that runs over all of us every day.

Yes I was a kid when so many horrible things happened to me, and then as time went on more things would happen in my adult life. I found myself angry, and bitter, and the monster that was inside of me longed to escape. While any reasonable person could look at my life and understand why I’d be angry, the truth is, anger isn’t healthy to hold on to. I was wrong for so many years to let it stick with me. I watched as that anger turned inward and became the root of my self worth’s destruction. I feel rejection deeply, a blow that can often bring me to my knees. As rejection has become such a big part of my life, I hurt deeply when it happens. I have a hard time not blaming myself when others feel the desire to walk away. My mind tells me it’s my fault no one loves me. My mind tells me it’s me, and I must be worthless. I’m not strong enough to manage the pain inside, and I’m weak for feeling this way. All lies.

Jesus Christ, the son of the Father, became sin so we would not have to bare the burden of death. Jesus was an act of love and mercy, and if we were not worthy of God’s love, if we were not important to God, we would not have been saved. We are the multitude of God’s creation, and we were so loved, meaning we were so important to God, that we were given the gift of Jesus Christ to pay our ransom, our very own individual ticket to Heaven. If we want to be angry, bitter, and full of hate, have you taken a moment to ask where that came from? Satan wants control, he wants us to feel the darkness that he has fully embraced. Satan wasn’t rejected because of who he was, he was rejected by himself. He choose to rebel against God of his own selfish pride. He may not have known the true ramifications of his actins, but with the multitude of millions of fallen angels around the world, it’s no wonder anger and hatred has spread. As we become more disconnected with God we don’t feel his grace and mercy like we once had. As we pass laws to criminalize the Christian faith, we will see the darkness continue to spread over the land.

There is hope however, knowing that Jesus Christ is more powerful than the world. Jesus is sovereign over the heavens and Satan while his rule on earth is temporary, which will never amount to anything in the end. All the souls lost have joined the eternal damnation that will follow. Again, misery loves company. It wasn’t enough that Satan doomed the legion of fallen angels to eternal destruction, but Satan wants you to join him. What are you really angry about? Are you angry that God didn’t give you that pony when you were 13?  Are you angry you missed out on that promotion at work, or that your spouse had an affair? If you’re going to be angry at anything be angry that Satan has his hands around your loved ones. Be angry that Satan fills this world with lies to fuel his own sick, demented desires. Be angry that Satan is taking lives meant for Heaven and dooming them into a pit of despair. It’s okay to be angry, just make sure you use that anger for the glory of God, and realize whom the true enemy is.

Don’t let anger consume you. Don’t walk the path of darkness, do not hold onto the hatred that fills your soul. As Yoda once said, “Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering.”  If God, the one who created the Heavens and the Earth loved us so much, how can we be angry? We must lift up our hearts, to the one who holds the stars. We must trust in the goodness of this world because there is still light left. We must reject sin with malice. We must choose love over anger. Don’t be like me, don’t hold onto that anger for so long it stains the very core of your heart. Don’t allow anger to take up a permanent residence inside you. Feel the anger, and then let it go. Watch it leave with your breath, and allow the Holy Spirit to breathe inside you cleansing your spirit. Follow God’s word, Gods love, and live that love in your every day. While I have had just cause to be angry, what I didn’t have was the right to stay angry. Now I’m dealing with the self -loathing and self-doubt, and dealing with the stain is worse then getting spaghetti sauce on a white tablecloth. I have hated what I became, and as I kept it secret for many years, now it’s time to destroy that monster inside.

 We must understand that to fight the darkness, it’s to fundamentally change how we view the world. We must understand who we are in this place, and realize the world’s lies to us, and about us, do not define who we are. We must trust in God’s love, and not doubt our creator. If we believe that God is perfect, and His plan is perfect, then we must believe that we are exactly who we because it’s what God wanted. We have the choice how to allow the world to affect us, and if we choose to let the world lie to us, beat us down, make us angry, that’s a personal choice, and not what God wanted. Don’t get me wrong, anger is a healthy emotion, even Christ showed anger. God has displayed anger, and we too are given the emotion for a reason, but don’t allow that to consume you, to control you. You are in control of your emotions when you acknowledge them and deal with them. It’s okay to face the darkness, just don’t become the darkness.

Not Gonna Die Tonight

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Not Gonna Die Tonight

The sun rises springing up hope. The shadows retreat into the abyss and safe from death for another night. I’m gonna fly today and fight another day. The sun grants hope, and faith is restored. Jesus taught us not to fear the darkness, and to even travel into battle, courageous, full of strength, never allowing our senses to be dulled and holding firm against the minions of Satan. The night brings doubt, and fear, uncertain of what’s lurking in every shadow, but if we are walking in Christ, and for Christ, we shine brightly forcing the darkness to retreat. We stand tall as a courageous warrior for Christ, and when we stand toe to toe with the enemy, or the servants of Satan we must not allow fear to take control.

Tonight the sun will set and the whispers rise up breaking the silence, filling your mind of dark thoughts. Your salvation is secure if you know the Lord. The enemy has no power over you. The enemy has nothing to leverage over you. You have a ledger of all your sins, all your transgressions, and yet, in a single dying wish, we are forgiven of our lowest thoughts and actions. Grace and mercy are weapons against death and they save all who accept treatment for the sickness that has spread over this beautiful planet like a cancer.

We must prepare the armor every night in preparation for the pending attacks that will come. Night for me is the hardest time. Fear fills my heart and my mind making me question who I am. I question my worth, my love, and I doubt I am worthy of anyone’s affections. I wonder if I’m so damaged I am not a good fit for anyone. The evil finds its way into my mind and I begin to mount resistance. Satan tries hard to remove me from the board and I’m still here. Every single day is a battlefield and each and every time I open my eyes in the morning is another day Satan failed to bring me down. It’s hard to remember how important and precious you are because the world is designed to lie to you. Friends and family forsake you, the world may take everything from you, but the one the one thing that can’t be taken from you is your salvation. You’re a precious commodity of the Lord’s and Jesus Christ did not die in vein. We cannot allow the darkness to take up a permanent residence in our mind and spread to our hearts. You wake up in the morning and you can break free of Satan’s grasp. Everyday is a gift from God and every day our faith is restored that we are still here. Do not be afraid. Be bold and strong trusting in the Lord to heal your wounds. We have enemies all around us and we are soldiers in a war. Soldiers can win battles but doesn’t promise free from injury. We may be wounded but Christ mends the broken spirit. Feel the sun on your face and wipe away your tears, tend to your injuries, and know that Christ is always with you. No one gets out of this life alive, but because of a death we will live. The resurrection of Christ is hope to all. We must be brave and remember the voice of truth always.

Behind each solder in this life is a promise of that hope. For fighting for Christ we are promised peace and eternal blessings. Be something more than a pawn. Do not be an unknowing participant of the Devils schemes. Do not fall for the games, and the half truths. The messiah has come to save us from a life of living in no hope, a land full of darkness and despair, in which we are passing through but not truly living. 1 John 2:15-17 “Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. 16 For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world. 17 And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever.” We cannot love the world, and hope the world will love us back. We cannot place our faith in the world when the world is under the rule of the Devil. The world is a cruel and unforgiving place, but in lieu of so much darkness we have a forgiving Father who wipes our slate clean, washes us from the filth that are exposed to as ambassadors for Christ. Warriors must be willing to make sacrifices, be willing to low crawl in the mud and even put him/her self in harms way.

The Devil cheats you, lies to you by giving just enough truth to make the argument sound good. The Devil gets in your head feeding you hope in freedom away from the laws of God. The Devil sews dissention and attempts to bring chaos to the world. Cast unto the fire is the fate that awaits those who tried to overthrow God. The Devil, Lusifer, who was cast out of perfection does not want to live in Hell for eternity alone so those who fall for the lies, the deceits, the philosophy of man shall join him in an eternal fire. Colossians 2:8 “Beware lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit, according to the tradition of men, according to the basic principles of the world, and not according to Christ.” Do not fall victim to the bait because at the foot of the cross you shall be judged by your actions alone, and no argument will sway the judge of your innocence. No lie, no excuses will alter the course of your fate if you deny Jesus Christ as the true son of the Father, the lamb that bled for you so you may live. Denying Christ is sealing your own death certificate and given the choice now, will you choose to be a follower of the light, or a follower of the dark? There is no in between, there is only light and dark. If you are not of Christ you are of the world, and if you are of the world, you will parish and be dust once more. Men and women have died for the truth, and have given up everything for that truth. Don’t die tonight, instead choose to live, and light up the darkness that surrounds you. Stand firm if you are of Christ, and guide those who are lost. Ready yourselves for the next battle for it may come sooner then you think.