Guilty Conscious
Jude 1:13 “They are wild waves of the sea, foaming up their shame; wandering stars, for whom blackest darkness has been reserved forever.” We live this life and we can make mistakes and sometimes we make a mistake that is difficult to come back from. The shame we feel when we have wronged someone deeply can eat us up inside. The past can be heavier then the weight of the world. Like Atlas in the legends of old holding up the edge of the sky, the weight of our decisions on our shoulders weigh us down. We allow the guilt of our decisions to poison us and over time that guilt grows, it spreads like mold and cancer in our bodies. The decease in which there is only one cure. Ecclesiastes 1:8 “All things are full of labour; man cannot utter it: the eye is not satisfied with seeing, nor the ear filled with hearing.” We can try to right our wrongs, we can try to do all manner of works, but the truth is nothing will ever be good enough. We must learn that in all things anything worth having comes from God. We must learn to allow the Holy Spirit into our hearts, and that’s where forgiveness starts. Forgiveness is only worth anything if we do it right from the start. We must forgive ourselves, and we must learn to let go of our own shame and guilt. Second, we must ask our Father in Heaven to forgive us for our wrongdoing. Lastly we must ask forgiveness from those whom we’ve wronged.
Asking forgiveness or even admitting wrongdoing is usually the result of one major issue, vanity. Ecclesiastes 1:2 “Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.” Vanity is tough, and can be very hard to overcome. Ecclesiastes 2:23 “For all his days are full of sorrow, and his work is a vexation. Even in the night his heart does not rest. This also is vanity.” The whole problem is not letting one’s self heal from grief, and mistakes. We can’t live our happy lives if we are stuck in the past. We cannot see the happiness in front of us when we are blinded by pain.
When our pain is no longer a filter for our perspective we can actually see the true meaning behind Ecclesiastes 9:9 “Enjoy life with the wife whom you love, all the days of your vain life that he has given you under the sun, because that is your portion in life and in your toil at which you toil under the sun.” While this verse states a wife, it truly goes beyond any of that, and all our blessings from the Lord are important and gifts. We must honor our gifts and not take them for granted. When we squander our gifts we shouldn’t be surprised if we don’t get them anymore. Treat every good things as a blessing, a gift from God and honor that gift.
If you’re Batman, and you accidently crash your dune buggy into someone’s house, do you say oops? As a person, as a human being, we are broken into categories. We are both good and evil. Everyone has the potential for both, and every day we have the potential to make both good and bad choices. Every day we see the choices in our lives, along our path that gives us the opportunity to decide who we are. When we make a bad decision we have the choice to continue along that path or alter it for a new one.