Frustrations

July 7, 2018 thearrowpreacherLeave a comment

Frustrations,

We cannot walk through life without running into a few challenges. We cannot expect to never face the rain. Someone said to me once, ‘when it rains, some people feel the rain, others just get wet.’ I think one of the hardest things we will do as people is embrace the trials with an open mind and using that big beautiful brain God gave us to focus on the positive things even in the worst situations we find ourselves in. Galatians 6:9 “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” Feelings of doubt and frustration are natural and normal to have. We all have our tough days, and I’ve had my fair share lately. What’s important is not that you have them, but that you are able to make your way through as a Christian, and keeping your witness. John 16:33“These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” The trials come, and come with a vengeance sometimes. It’s aright to feel frustrated, and even angry sometimes. It’s okay to vent as long as it’s controlled. Most importantly when you’re struggling make sure to take your concerns to the one who can truly do something, God.

As far as everyone else is concerned, when you see your brothers and sisters struggling be sure to help them. Be sure to provide encouragement, and love. It’s not easy going through trials. We all have, and we all hope to have someone to lean on when the going gets tough. Don’t be that friend that casts blame, or rebukes someone for being, ‘negative.’ One of my biggest pet peeves is when someone says you’re being too negative. Discussing trials, and struggles isn’t negative it’s a fact of life. Everyone goes through tough seasons, bad storms, and everyone deserves to have someone to listen, someone who will care, and help them through it. Don’t abandon those in need because if you do, you’re actually the one in sin. Proverbs 27:10“Do not forsake your own friend or your father’s friend, And do not go to your brother’s house in the day of your calamity; Better is a neighbor who is near than a brother far away.” So many people today want only the feel good positives in their lives, and often try to remove anyone who is going through a tough time in fear they may be contaminated by negativity. The truth is, while some people are more prone to being negative and that may not be an undesirable trait, we must look at a person’s situation and ask how we’d feel in their shoes.

For me, I lost a lot of friends after my ex-wife left. I was miserable for a few months and struggled to stand on my own two feet. I was devastated at the loss of my wife, and the incident which put me in the hospital. I had guilt, shame, heartbreak, worry, and a slue of other emotions, and when I wasn’t ‘snapping out of it’ in others perceived time table, I was abandoned by many. My life at that time mirrored the life of Job. Many of my situations were similar, and as I continued to struggle and limp along, many of my pastor friends pointed me to the book of Job, and the trials of Paul. To this day many of my works would involve references of those two men as my inspiration to carry on. Just remember if you struggle as I have, or if you’ve struggled as Job had, and you find yourself alone, forgotten, remember these words. Job 19:14“My relatives have failed, And my intimate friends have forgotten me.” Even when Job was left and forgotten by his closest friends, rebuked, blamed for his misfortunes, he never gave up hope. Job 19:26“26 And after my skin is [a]destroyed, this I know, That in my flesh I shall see God,” He Trusted the Lord, and knew that God would never leave him. We must all trust in the Lord that in all things blessings can be found in every trial, every storm, every heartbreak, and every thorn.

Accused and Apathy

June 10, 2018 thearrowpreacherLeave a comment

Accused and Apathy:

Recently I was accused of being a bad friend. I was accused of not being a good Christian man. If we’re honest about the good and bad in life I will say I am human and I will always fall short. Now, that being said I will always admit to my mistakes, but these recent accusations were completely and utterly unfounded. People often say things under the umbrella of emotions and when they do there’s really no telling what may come out.

Often when the truth is uttered those who hear and feel a conviction will lash out in anger. They are not slow to speak and they cause destruction left behind after the sound waves of their voice subsides. The wicked tongue is plentiful today. It’s all around us in the music we listen to on the radio, the movies and TV shows we watch, and even the voices heard in our very homes. Proverbs 21:23“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.” No one seems to care anymore that communication is slowly dying. I’ve watched as excuse after excuse comes across my phone screen as to why a message was ignored for days, weeks, and sometimes longer. I’ve gotten every manner of excuses and while some are absolutely legitimate others are not. My biggest frustration is when I get the simple excuse I’ve just been busy. This verbiage, busy, doesn’t usually mean busy, it means ‘you weren’t a priority.’ Thus the excuse given really comes from a place of apathy. For those of you who don’t know what that means, I’ll give you the definition, Apathy: lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern. There was no concern on how someone would feel being left hanging, dangling there for weeks before a response was finally given, and that response never actually held an apology. See, what most people fail to realize is just as dangerous as the tongue is, as it’s probably the most dangerous weapon on the planet, it has the power to build, or destroy. Matthew 15:11“It is not what goes into the mouth that defiles a person, but what comes out of the mouth; this defiles a person.”

I have a good friend who has a few kids. He has often told me about his policy with the kids, the punishment for wrong doing will be equal to the crime, but the punishment for a lie on top of the crime, much more severe. This makes sense because we as Christians know we will make mistakes. We know that it’s not about if we screw up but when. The thing with those mistakes is using the tongue along with actions to try and make amends for that mistake. So many people are afraid to stand up and speak the truth, but more are perfectly content living in a world where they never have to face the consequences of their actions. So many now lash out, out of anger and never fully see the ramifications of those words because now everything is done over non-verbal, or vocal communications. People now are so quick to anger, so quick to shoot off a ill thought out text that things are said without thought, and likewise in that anger it’s so easy to hit a couple buttons and poof, that persons gone from your life. People in droves make rash, hurtful remarks and then run away before any defense can be made, thus destroying the very foundation of friendships, and relationships. Proverbs 12:18“There is one whose rash words are like sword thrusts, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”

Proverbs 18:21“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” When we consider the power of the tongue and what we say, how it affects people in our life, we hold such power just a few inches from our brains. Many have little concern now about who they hurt, what they say, or why. On top of a lack of caring how our words affect people, the effect goes far beyond just what we say. A general apathy has sprung up in people all over the world. Since we have gotten to the point now where we don’t care what we say, how we say it, the other side of that coin is we don’t truly care about others. I’ve been in the online dating world for quite some time now, and I have noted on multiple occasions in the last 24 months that people just stopped caring about anyone but themselves. There’s no thought to the curtsey given to how we treat people. We ignore messages, we lie about the excuses to cause long delays in communications, and that’s if communication doesn’t stop abruptly without warning. I’ve always prided myself as being a very understanding person. I’ve watched people do horrible things that affected me and it wasn’t the mistake that hurt the most, it was lying to me about it. If someone doesn’t have the desire to have fluid communication often, a simple text to inform me of that would go a long way. James 3:10“From the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, these things ought not to be so.” When will we finally realize how our words and actions affect other people?

Something I’ve often wondered is when we are quick to anger and that anger leads to a wicked tongue, how then can that very same person say to the accused “You’re not a Christian man?” I have pondered this very thing for a little while now, and as I’ve gone back over conversations for a long while involving many people, I have come to a sad realization; the term Christian is perhaps the worst Apathy of all. How many Christians or self proclaimed Christians are there all over the world? How many of them would say, “I’m Christian, but it’s not important.”? How many would say they are Christian on Christmas, Easter, and maybe one or two sprinkled in the rest of the year? We see less then 19% of Christians now are involved Christians meaning, fewer then 19% open and read there Bibles more then 3 times a week, most far less if ever. How can someone stand there and pass judgment about doing nothing but stating facts, with no emotional bias, even if those facts don’t show someone in an appealing light? The answer is convictions. When we are confronted with our own shortcomings and we become angry we say and do things that are within its very nature, Sinful. We live in a world where truth is something convenient we don’t like to face.

We’ve become so consumed with self that we have such a deep apathy for other people. We don’t care how we hurt someone, or why. We don’t care to lead someone along only to drop them from the side of the cliff. Apathy my friends is a disease that is plaguing our society. The invention of texts, and online dating have created a gap in the human condition that now allows people to do what they wish and never having to see the fallout from their actions. Being accused recently of being a bad Christian, and treating my friends badly, is obviously coming from someone who is hurting badly themselves. Truth however, no matter how painful is always the best way to go. The truth is, people can be cruel, and manipulative and hold nothing but apathy for you. All we can do is love, pray, and continue to lean on God’s word the best we can. We are people and we will make mistakes. People always need to be forgiven for their trespasses, and thus we must always ask for forgiveness of our trespasses. Never loose sight of the hope that springs in the horizon every day. We may be accused but our accusers who flee before a defense do not seek answers or retribution. Those who spit venom and run away are nothing shy of cowards. Those who hide behind technology afraid to face their own fallout are cowards. Do not worry yourself with these types of people, no, I say to you my brothers and sisters, forever pray that God opens their eyes to see, warms their hearts to feel, and blesses their souls with empathy and love. Are you the sword or just a poor reflection? Don’t loose hope for, while God is still sovereign over all, there will always be hope.

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Make the plan, execute the plan, expect the plan to go off the rails, Throw away the plan.

June 28, 2017May 21, 2018 thearrowpreacherLeave a comment

Make the plan, execute the plan, expect the plan to go off the rails, Throw away the plan. 6-27-17

So I realize the title is a little longer then usual today but stay with me. As I recently figured out my new path in life I set the plan, I was getting ready to execute the plan, and before I got to execute it went off the rails and then I had to reevaluate and draw up new plans. This is often how life goes; especially when we try to plan to far in advance. It’s one thing to have goals, it’s another to try to make your own plans and expect God won’t put you on a better path.

We often get lost on the paths that present themselves. We search and search and we never actually get anywhere. Finding the forward momentum when plans keep changing is difficult. Are you the type of person to flake out on plans last minute, or are you the type of person that when plans change you go into freak out mode? We can’t expect life to go the way we think it will. Our minds are far too small to think of every contingency and expect that the odds will always be in our favor. Let me give you a small example.

Recently I knew someone who was going through a rough divorce. There was pain on both sides and despite trying to put things back together it just fell apart more. She was angry with a lot of things, and he was upset at being abandoned by her. Months had gone by and they hadn’t spoken. He was getting ready to move forward with his life and leave town. She was someplace and although he prayed for her every day he figured she was gone forever. Just a few weeks away from his leaving town, she called him with a bombshell of news. News that frankly he reported floored him, not by surprise, but in sorrow for her. He took the time to pray for her, ministered to her, gave her options and bid his farewells while she contemplated his 3 offers.

To this day the situation hasn’t been resolved but he knows that he may have to radically change his plans depending on how this may go for him. The best thing he can do is pray for her, pray for him, and pray that God’s work continues. He prays that she will find peace no matter what decision she makes. He loves her deeply and wants her to be happy. But, he needs to be happy also. Prayers my friend, prayers.

You can see how fast something can change. You never know when someone from your past will show up unannounced, or that car accident, or great uncle Timmy passed and left a million dollars…. Don’t we all wish. There’s something to be said for Chaos theory. Infinite possibilities in an infinite world that looks like pure chaos with an underlying pattern that we don’t usually see. The key is that the plan is there we just can’t see it. God’s much the same. It’s okay to have our goals, our desires, and as long as they match up with God’s plan for us we will generally find a great surplus of blessings.

Luke 14:28-33 ^“28For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? ²⁹Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, ³⁰saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’ ³¹Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? ³²And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace. ³³So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.” If we are to have a plan our plan must be well thought out, planned through, and in lined with Gods will. Praying about our plans, asking God for signs to point to the right plans, and expecting that along the way even the best laid plans will likely have surprises along the way. Proverbs 14:8 “The wisdom of the prudent is to discern his way, but the folly of fools is deceiving” We mustn’t be hasty, we must diligently plan and pray for each part of the plan. Proverbs 21:5 “The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance, but everyone who is hasty comes only to poverty.” We can only know and plan for so much from what we can see in our tiny little section of the world. James 1:5 “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.”

We won’t always know which way to go but it’s important for us to realize when we don’t. When we finally realize how important that relationship with God is, that relationship with good Godly brothers and sisters, and we know how to and when to ask for Godly counsel, that’s when we will finally see a change. When we listen and obey God we will be blessed for it. Even when we go through hardships and trials, and traumas, how we choose to handle each of those situations will also lead us to be judged by Abba. Our father loves us and will let us fall on our faces if we are stubborn. God will let you continue to fall on your face. He’ll let you stick your finger in the light socket, but when it goes badly God’s not above saying I told you so. God will always be there and when you’re ready to stop doing it your way and find a new way God will still be there. Just remember, when we don’t listen to God, eventually God will yell to get our attention, and we usually won’t like the outcome. We have to understand that sometimes God will not allow our plan to continue because of some reason and we don’t need to understand why, we just need to accept it and instead of throwing a temper tantrum, we just need to move on.

Think about it this way. You’re getting ready for work, and you head out to your car and overnight a tree has fallen in the driveway and you can’t get out. You miss a huge meeting at work, and maybe even a promotion. You go inside to make a call to get someone to come remove the tree. An hour goes by and you turn on the news. There’s a 25-car pileup due to fog, and 10 people are seriously hurt, 4 have died. The location is the same highway you travel, at the same time you’d be traveling through that section. Was the tree preventing you from a meeting, or was it preventing you from getting hurt or worse? There’s truly no way of knowing how each setback is for our benefit, but if we consider this example we might be a little less likely to rush to frustration when the ‘plan’ flies off the rails. There’s nothing wrong with making Godly plans, there’s nothing wrong with working towards a goal of something we desire, so long as it aligns with following God. Just remember if God so deems one of these will happen to you. “Make the plan, execute the plan, expect the plan to go off the rails, Throw away the plan.” Lenard Snart

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