Rehashing the Past
From the time that we are born, to the time that we die, there are both good and bad things we experience. We know from scripture why bad things happen, and simply put it’s because sin entered the world, and good and evil are present every day. But what happens if we experience the bad and we do nothing about it? In the past, I’ve talked about the dangers of compartmentalization for coping techniques, for further read you can follow this link. https://thearrowpreacher.wordpress.com/2017/06/16/a-past-long-forgotten-the-dangers-of-compartmentalization/
Years later after I believed everything was tucked away in a nice box, sitting on a shelf somewhere inside my mind, where a closest door remained locked, bolted, and guarded, never to be reopened, a foul evil creature grew inside that closet and it was hungry for revenge. I realize the symbolism is a bit out there, but in all reality the events of September 16thwill forever be etched in stone as a dark mark on my reputation and my ego. That day left me with shame, guilt, and fear. As I have tried to move on from that day, it’s hard to imagine I was ever so low in my life. The thing about being low and never dealing with it is when that hidden monster comes back to exact revenge for being put away in the closet. So how do you make peace with that angry monster? You must be brave enough to confront the beast, to face your fears, and don’t back down when it gets hard.
In the next week I will be started a series of therapy sessions designed to manage particular traumatic events in my past to deal with and manage those events so I control them and they do not control me. Those memories are difficult to think about and while on the surface it looks like everything is just fine, if I’m truly honest with myself there are feelings buried deep down that I have gotten pretty good at hiding and masking. After two years ago however it’s time to finally face the monsters and be rid of them once and for all.
It is in scripture and therapeutic techniques I will find peace. I have been praying to God to prepare me for the trials ahead, and calm my heart, and allow me to see the light in such a dark place. Psalm 107:13-16“Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he delivered them from their distress. He brought them out of darkness and the shadow of death, and burst their bonds apart. Let them thank the Lord for his steadfast love, for his wondrous works to the children of man! For he shatters the doors of bronze and cuts in two the bars of iron.” It is in my heart the darkness rests, and for many years I have not allowed the pain to surface, but in an instant the defenses cracked and out came the monster angry and bitter, spreading lies and fear, and on that day, the monster won. Today however I am older, wiser, and more in control, I shall not fear the monster any longer, as I will fight the war on my terms. Psalm 91:4-6“He will cover you with his pinions, and under his wings you will find refuge; his faithfulness is a shield and buckler. You will not fear the terror of the night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in darkness, nor the destruction that wastes at noonday.” Jesus comforts me, and protects me. I know I am protected as I go forward. The past cannot hurt me anymore, and I will not allow it to control me. Isaiah 41:10“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
For all who deal with past traumas, hardships, and pain, there is always hope. Tomorrow doesn’t have to be full of darkness and pain. In order to be rid of it, we must first see our enemy and rise to the occasion to face it head on. God is with you, so if you have a past, face that past in a controlled and safe environment, don’t wait till tomorrow, live in peace today.
The Arrow Preacher 