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Well Done

Well Done

I was thinking about a song I heard recently called Well Done by The Afters. It’s about being told well done by God when you reach Heaven. I have always wanted to have my dad tell me well done, and that he was proud of the man I’ve become. This is something that will never happen of course, but having that affirmation has always been something I’ve dreamt of. All these years I have walked this life and I’ve managed to learn a great deal of what a father’s supposed to teach their son. I can throw a ball, I can ride a bike, I can shoot a gun, but there are lots of things I don’t know how to do. I have wondered what kind of father I might be someday if I ever become a father. One of my biggest dreams in life is to be a dad, even with the level of fear I have on the subject. Will I be able to tell my kids well done? Will I be able to watch them grow and be proud of who they become? Dreams, and nothing more than dreams. As for me I hope the only father I’ve ever had is proud of me. Sometimes it’s hard for me to be positive when I don’t know if Abba is proud of me or not. Sometimes I feel lost, and quite frankly I feel sad some days. I’ve looked back on the life I’ve lived and I see some great things, and I’ve seen some things that are highly questionable. All I can do now, is continue to grow in Christ, have faith in Abba, and keep moving forward.

I have to remind myself I work for the Lord, I don’t work for man. I write for the Lord, for the pleasing of God, and nothing else matters. Colossians 3:23 (NKJV)23 “And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men,” I know I need my Lord, my salvation. I know I fall short, and I know I sin, but I know I need only ask, and seek the Lord, and I shall be forgiven for my transgressions. 1 John 3:2 (NKJV)“Beloved, now we are children of God; and it has not yet been revealed what we shall be, but we know that when He is revealed, we shall be like Him, for we shall see Him as He is.” I pray for the day I am called home, but till then I remain here, in this life, faithful, and doing Gods will.

When I look back over my life, sometimes I wonder how I ever made it through. I wonder how I never got into drugs, or alcohol, or mixed up in criminal activity. I often wonder how I’m not dead with how close it’s been so many times over. I know there were days when the pain felt more than I could bare. I know there were days when I wanted to throw in the towel and walk away. The storms seemed to last forever never letting up. Through it all Jesus was by my side, and protecting me. I have experienced so much pain, so much loss, and so many betrayals, but God is a loving God, and He hasn’t ever left my side. The Lord God Almighty has watched me waver, but has always kept me on track. I have fallen, and I’ve always been picked back up. I’ve had scraped knees, and bruises, but I’ve always been taken care of. The awesome power of God is beyond words, beyond comprehension, and I have felt the awesome power move through me. My God saved me when I was at my lowest, and if that’s not a father I don’t know what is. I have a father even if I can’t see Him, even if I can’t always feel him, my father is here for me always. One day I will be home, and I hope to hear father tell me well done. I pray I hear father’s proud of me, proud of the life I lived. I hope when I die, I will be welcomed into Heaven, and hope that the race will not be for nothing. What will it be like? I can only imagine.

 

Sewing Dissension

Sewing Dissension

1 Corinthians 10:13“Conscience, I say, not thine own, but of the other: for why is my liberty judged of another man’s conscience?” If we are looking at this from a position of denominations and the dissension that has sprung up all over the church body, why do we deny one denomination of another? This denial should only be a true look at scripture and even if there are differences of opinions, that is not a reason to turn your back on someone because they believe in something just a little different.

Different denominations and the separate and not equal mentality! The faith of Jesus Christ should not hold this dissension and this off putting mentality of unwelcomeness. The Church of Christ is not meant to be a separate body, but a whole body, under one book, under one voice of truth and one truth.

“I am the way the truth and the life” John 14:6, not a way, or one way, it’s the way. We all have a common enemy and it should never be one another. When we no longer recognize each other because we fall under a different denomination at this point we are no longer showing the love to our neighbors that we were commanded to do. Turning our backs on one another because of doctrine beliefs, that aren’t within the nature of scripture.

Paul speaks about the dissension that started to spring up. The warning of the divide and we today see this widespread. The hope we share in Christ needs to be reborn, a revelation in our eyes and a restoration of our souls in a revival. Psalm 51:10“Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.” We are set free from the chains of bondage. And no separation of denomination will matter, because Satan does not care about what compartment of faith you pull from. Satan attacks as an equal opportunity and the only save is Jesus Christ. Catholic, Lutheran, Baptist, Methodist, anyone else who believes in Christ, we are one body.

Psalm 51: 51 Have mercy upon me, O God, according to thy lovingkindness: according unto the multitude of thy tender mercies blot out my transgressions.

2 Wash me throughly from mine iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin.

3 For I acknowledge my transgressions: and my sin is ever before me.

4 Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, and done this evil in thy sight: that thou mightest be justified when thou speakest, and be clear when thou judgest.

5 Behold, I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.

6 Behold, thou desirest truth in the inward parts: and in the hidden part thou shalt make me to know wisdom.

7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow 

8 Make me to hear joy and gladness; that the bones which thou hast broken may rejoice.

9 Hide thy face from my sins, and blot out all mine iniquities.

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.

11 Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.

12 Restore unto me the joy of thy salvation; and uphold me with thy free spirit.

13 Then will I teach transgressors thy ways; and sinners shall be converted unto thee.

14 Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, thou God of my salvation: and my tongue shall sing aloud of thy righteousness.

15 O Lord, open thou my lips; and my mouth shall shew forth thy praise.

16 For thou desirest not sacrifice; else would I give it: thou delightest not in burnt offering.

17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.

18 Do good in thy good pleasure unto Zion: build thou the walls of Jerusalem.

19 Then shalt thou be pleased with the sacrifices of righteousness, with burnt offering and whole burnt offering: then shall they offer bullocks upon thine altar.

What a world it becomes when man makes his own way under the table of faith, but digging the tunnel under the faith be ready for the collapse of sin upon your head. You cannot flee from the repercussions from sin, and we cannot avoid the result of Satan’s grasp when we ignore the walk of the Lord.

When we fail and fall it’s important to reset our walk in Gods perfect forgiveness. Gods righteousness is unyielding and we deserve the path of Hell, but grace saves. Are we walking the true path of Christ or are we trying to create our own way. Sin drags you down, and the further you go trying to fix your problems on your own, the more over encumbered you will be. Are you turning your back on someone for their actions, but you have not washed away your own transgressions? Are you filthy of your  sin and fallen to temptations? We are all sinners alike, no matter the denomination you follow, and skirting scripture or creating false doctrine is sinful behavior. No matter the person who claims doctrine without true understanding of scripture. Galatians 2:16“Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified.”

Galatians 3:11“But that no man is justified by the law in the sight of God, it is evident: for, The just shall live by faith.”This is the fight Paul was addressing in his letter to Galatia. He was trying to get them to understand the nature of Christ, and to stop arguing over doctrine and having the Jesus plus one mentality. Galatians 5:14-18“For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. 15 But if ye bite and devour one another, take heed that ye be not consumed one of another. 16 This I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh. 17 For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would. 18 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.”Are we living in Church law that is not Gods law? Are we blind to scripture as we never do more than listen to what one speaks and we take that word as truth yet we never know the truth of the Word of God.

Stop looking down at one another based on politics, or denominations. We are one body of Christ and we need to stop acting like we are apart. Be of faith, and the blood of Christ. If Paul were to write your church a letter what would he say? Would he say well done, or shame on you? Just a thought, which I think we can all take to ponder for a while. Wash away your old selves, your dirty sin, and be new. Allow the blood of Christ to make you white as snow, and create a bond of all those who follow our Lord and Savior. We may have our differences, but never does that give us the right to shut the door on another Christian. Do not let the differences in denomination transcend into a different religion all together.

Livin’ On A Prayer

Livin’ On A Prayer

Life can be tough, life can be hard, life can be stressful, and life can sometimes be awful, but in this life we are livin’ on a prayer. Through all that this world can throw at you, are you strong in your prayer life? Are you turning to God giving thanks, giving praise, humbling yourself by admitting your shortcomings and sins? God is the only force that can effect true change in your life. You must allow Jesus Christ into your heart, and accept that change. You must grow in your relationship with God and that relationship is built upon prayer. Even when David was on the run, out numbered, and the odds weren’t in his favor, on the surface anyway. The thing with the perceptions we often have, we cannot see what God is doing.

Psalm 3 King James Version (KJV)

3 Lord, how are they increased that trouble me! many are they that rise up against me.

 2 Many there be which say of my soul, There is no help for him in God. Selah.

 3 But thou, O Lord, art a shield for me; my glory, and the lifter up of mine head.

 4 I cried unto the Lord with my voice, and he heard me out of his holy hill. Selah.

 5 I laid me down and slept; I awaked; for the Lord sustained me.

 6 I will not be afraid of ten thousands of people, that have set themselves against me round about.

 7 Arise, O Lord; save me, O my God: for thou hast smitten all mine enemies upon the cheek bone; thou hast broken the teeth of the ungodly.

 8 Salvation belongeth unto the Lord: thy blessing is upon thy people. Selah.

 

We cannot underestimate the power of prayer, the power of God. The words of David ring in my ears as the music he wrote stays with me.

Psalm 63 King James Version (KJV)

63 O God, thou art my God; early will I seek thee: my soul thirsteth for thee, my flesh longeth for thee in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is;

 2 To see thy power and thy glory, so as I have seen thee in the sanctuary.

 3 Because thy lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise thee.

 4 Thus will I bless thee while I live: I will lift up my hands in thy name.

 5 My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness; and my mouth shall praise thee with joyful lips:

 6 When I remember thee upon my bed, and meditate on thee in the night watches.

 7 Because thou hast been my help, therefore in the shadow of thy wings will I rejoice.

 8 My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.

 9 But those that seek my soul, to destroy it, shall go into the lower parts of the earth.

 10 They shall fall by the sword: they shall be a portion for foxes.

 11 But the king shall rejoice in God; every one that sweareth by him shall glory: but the mouth of them that speak lies shall be stopped.

 

We all make mistakes, and we all sin. We can try to avoid the more obvious sins, but in this world, sinning is inevitable. All we can do in our sin is acknowledge it, and pray to ask for forgiveness, guidance, and strength to not commit the same sin again. We cannot live in a constant state of pessimism, and we need to focus on the good God is doing in our life, and trust that He’s there in the bad also.

Psalm 63 King James Version (KJV)

63 O God, thou art my God; early will I seek thee: my soul thirsteth for thee, my flesh longeth for thee in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is;

 2 To see thy power and thy glory, so as I have seen thee in the sanctuary.

 3 Because thy lovingkindness is better than life, my lips shall praise thee.

 4 Thus will I bless thee while I live: I will lift up my hands in thy name.

 5 My soul shall be satisfied as with marrow and fatness; and my mouth shall praise thee with joyful lips:

 6 When I remember thee upon my bed, and meditate on thee in the night watches.

 7 Because thou hast been my help, therefore in the shadow of thy wings will I rejoice.

 8 My soul followeth hard after thee: thy right hand upholdeth me.

 9 But those that seek my soul, to destroy it, shall go into the lower parts of the earth.

 10 They shall fall by the sword: they shall be a portion for foxes.

 11 But the king shall rejoice in God; every one that sweareth by him shall glory: but the mouth of them that speak lies shall be stopped.

 

Fear not, for the Lord is with you always. Turn to God and know that his son Jesus Christ is with you, watching over you.

The Voice of a Child

The Voice of a Child

The storm raged on, and the wind howled like a banshee crying an angry song. As the storm passes the clouds part, the skies clear, and the stars begin to shine, brightly as the buzz of electricity is gone. The sounds of the insects, and animals outside can be heard clear as day without the blowing air of the air conditioner, the song of the television, or even just the hum of the house.

I remember when I was in Kuwait, and I was in the desert for training, the view from horizon to horizon was unobstructed, and with no light as far as the eye could see, it truly was black, except for the millions upon millions of stars that twinkled in the dark night sky. Never before, and not since, have I seen a sky like that. Even with the cities power out after tropical storm Michael, there’s still more light, and not nearly the quantity of stars. Even though there’s still the occasional sound of car way off in the distance it leaves you with a nice quiet, peaceful, and almost tranquil opportunity to turn to God, and talk to Abba.

As a child I can remember crying to God to take me home. I believed so completely that God has made a mistake and I should never have been born. I loathed myself, and I despised the reflection in the mirror. I was a cosmic blunder, and I prayed that one day God would see that mistake and take me home. I didn’t understand as a child why so many things were happening to me. I didn’t understand the nature of sin, and free will. I didn’t understand the cruelty of the human spirit, and it wouldn’t be for many years till I saw the other side. See, that scared child didn’t understand what it was going to take for him to be prepared for the battles ahead. That little boy didn’t know how to make steel, and didn’t know how to forge a sword ready for a war. The little boy could only see the injustice, the pain, the cruelty that seemed like the dark lord Sauron was pouring into the one ring.

We need to look to our children as the future for tomorrow. We must stick by them, and train in up in the fear and love of the Lord. We must teach them to be courageous in the inevitable dangers that will come. We must teach our children the voice of truth, and show them to flea from the draw of the devil. We must teach them the nature of sin, the nature of the world, but never take away their joy, their creativity, and their imagination. Embrace the faith of a child, and show them what love should be, and what is. Children can be so irreparably damaged by the adults that are supposed to be there to love them and show them the way.

Having this quite night with God, I have asked for a great many things, and not for myself, but for those I care for. I have watched the news footage of the aftermath left behind by one of the most destructive hurricanes to ever hit the United States, and as I thought back to my own childhood, what would a child ask for. Peace for those broken hearted as they start to return to what was once their homes. It may not provide any comfort, but I would remind them that this isn’t home. This life we live isn’t where we are meant to be, and as hard as it may be to grasp that, I can promise you, that if you know your savior and Lord Jesus Christ, you will know that home is with our Abba father. This isn’t where you belong for eternity. This is just part of the journey, and when you feel lost in the raging sea, be assured that you are loved by the creator of the universe, and one day He will call you home. We can rebuild homes, businesses, towns, and cities, but the true nature of being human is the love and compassion we can show our neighbors who are in so much pain. Jesus knew the pain we would feel, and He’s given each of us a gift, and a voice to be heard. Never think your voice doesn’t matter, because when you speak with the Holy Spirit, even as the voice of a child, you have been given authority to spread the gospel, to spread the truth, and to spread the light of Christ over this darkened world.

As adults we get wrapped up in the world, the stress, the conflict, the conversation, but we forget how simple the message is. We forget the wondrous mystery that is our God, and we get enveloped by the world, and often don’t realize it. Remember how simple life was when you were a kid? How simple is it to know that God created the heavens and the Earth, Jesus Christ was Abba’s son, and He came to pay the ransom for our lives. That’s it, no more, that’s all you ever need to know. Jesus Christ loved us enough to lay down his life for his ‘friends’ and God loved us enough to give us His only son. The simple message of the Gospel, but we get caught up with what the world says is truth. We get caught up in theories, hypothesis, the controversies, and we loose sight of what’s important. Christ died for us to be free of an eternal death, and in the end, what else matters? To be an adult with the simplicity of a child.

As a child though I didn’t understand the more complicated issues. I looked at life a certain way, and didn’t understand the truth of the nature. Sadly some of those notions from childhood were carried along into adulthood. It’s not easy wondering in life why someone doesn’t care for you. It’s not easy growing up thinking people don’t want you around. That notion remained and it’s something I still am trying to drop as dead weight. I realize I don’t need it, I realize it’s not true, but convincing the brain of that is difficult. But as the stars at night are infinite, so are the possibilities with God on your side. We must trust in God and know that God doesn’t make mistakes. One should not question God’s motives, and as He, who created the universe also created you, you are here in this life for a reason. You’re special and made just the way you need to be. Things will happen to you and things may wound you, but that doesn’t mean you can’t grow and learn from it. Trust in the Lord, always.

Red Alert

Red Alert

We sit and wait, bracing for impact. All we can do is prepare, plan, and pray. We cannot worry for the storm, but trust in God that we are given the opportunity to show Christ within us as we move forward. There’s a season for everything, and while I can admit with honesty that this last 7-8 days has been a challenge. Since the accident of my car things have been one after another. Recently I spoke to a pastor, and we talked about the frequency of Satan’s attacks, and the level of attacks. It seems as though it’s no longer just one event, but now a slew of targeted attacks. The old axiom now seems the rule rather than the exception, ‘when it rains, it pours’. Sadly this makes things very difficult for people and families all over. In these times of struggles all we can do is react in a Christ like way, pray that God will deliver us, and show us a way through.

Here’s a small roadmap to manage the storm, and the upcoming storm:

Stand on God’s promises. There’s encouragement in scripture for almost every situation you may face. Be sure to build your foundation of faith on solid ground.

Pray always. It’s important to continue your prayers to the one and only that can truly make any changes, our Lord, our Abba Father.

Continue to Praise God for everything you face. It’s in our trials we rise to the occasion and we grow, but also that we grow closest to God. We must trust the Lord, and have the faith of a warrior and that means to praise God for the storms, the rainbows, and the sunshine.

Be the warrior. No one knows what they can do till they are tested. You don’t win the battle with the first swing of the sword. It takes time, it takes one step, then another. With every step and swing maintain your faith and every day bring your A game.

Miracles can happen. We may not always see the things that come together to work out situations, but if we took a deeper look, it’s likely we’d see micro miracles along the way. Trust in God that God can work anything out, and even the worst situations, good can come.

 

When the battles come, be sure to raise the alert, put on the armor, grab your shield, and prepare for spiritual battles. Psalm 18:39 (ESV)“For you equipped me with strength for the battle; you made those who rise against me sink under me.” The one who speaks of the warrior mentality, David, Psalm 144:1 ESV“Of David. Blessed be the Lord, my rock, who trains my hands for war, and my fingers for battle;”

Evidence Isn’t Fact

Evidence Isn’t Fact

What is evidence? Evidence:“the available body of facts or information indicating whether a belief or proposition is true or valid.” While this is true, one must consider that in a crime scene everything is gathered as evidence, and it’s weeded through to determine what is part of the case, and what isn’t.

For many years I’ve looked at a series of situations and placed a verdict based on the evidence, however, recently a new perspective was given to those situations and it’s fundamentally changed my view that all these years, I may have been wrong. In the book Cold Case Christianity By, J Warner Wallace explains the need to be objective when looking at the evidence at a crime scene. He describes a homicide and the importance of having an objective mindset free of any preconceived dispositions. I was looking at only one piece of evidence and I wasn’t examining the big picture. While the one small piece of evidence alone could have given me the end conclusion, those facts with other facts however offer a different explanation of the events. How foolish I’ve been for so long, believing I was the total cause. I put so much weight on the fact that just because I was present in different situations that I was the cause for those things to happen. I believed my self worth was based on the outcome of these cumulative events. I couldn’t have been more wrong.

I have spent years coming to a conclusion about myself, and while this new point of view is new, and exciting, change doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time to retrain your brain to believe something. Overwriting the original code isn’t easy, but when you consider your brain being a computer, and you need to change an idea, or a behavior, you must first learn how to hack in to the brain, and then you must learn to write new code to overwrite the old. This isn’t easy, and it takes time, but if it’s important to you, you can do it.

When you need to know what truth is, if you’re questioning where you stand, and you’re not sure where you should stand, scripture is clear, Romans 8:31“What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?” God is always behind us, next to us, in front of us, protecting us and if we are listening guiding us to safety. We cannot stay in our pain or sorrow. We must not focus on the people that hurt us, or those who leave us. While it’s true, people may say things that are harmful, even walk away from a friendship because they are hurting, but all we can do is pray, try to realize it may not be at fault for their departure.

Having friends leave is absolutely heartbreaking, especially when there isn’t a clear reason. The pain felt as it feels that yet another person is abandoning what seemed to be a good relationship cannot be understated. While many may look at a departure as ‘their loss’ for me and my injuries over the years it’s harder for me to look at it that way because of the cumulative effect. Having to look back over the years and evaluate my part in failed friendships, relationships, marriages, I have to understand that that I may not be at fault in each instance. I need to understand that while there will be some culpability; it may not be more then 50%. The losses I’ve experienced just in the last seven days alone have been hurtful and have created a resurgence of a worthless stance of my self-esteem.

I’ve struggled a great deal with the wonder and question as to why so many have left. It’s been said that I feel more deeply than some, that I hold on tighter than others, and in that, I hurt so much more when people show I am not valued in their life. I turn to scripture for guidance and peace, and while wounds are fresh, it can be difficult to find comfort so quickly. But, as a faithful Christian, I know that God can heal, and help my soul, and mend my broken heart. Psalm 34:18 (NKJV)18 “The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, And saves such as have a contrite spirit.”  God is with me no matter the day, no matter the hour and it’s in His presence that peace will be given. 1 Chronicles 16:11 (ESV)“Seek the Lord and his strength; seek his presence continually!”

While I started writing about looking at the evidence as to why those have left my life, I was faced with that very thing in the writing of this post. I don’t know or understand why someone would leave when I thought my presence was actually wanted and appreciated in their life. I don’t believe I did anything harmful, or hurtful, or intrusive, but I cannot allow the actions of others to define who I am. I know I try to serve others by being there for them, by helping them, by being Godly counsel for them, and trying to be what I can to help. This help isn’t always wanted, and sometimes as I mentioned in yesterdays post https://thearrowpreacher.wordpress.com/2018/10/09/parasite/

Some people may come into your life and take all they can and leave when they’ve had their fill. This is an inevitable part of life as a counselor, pastor, or doctor. You won’t always be able to help everyone, you can’t always save everyone, and no everyone wants to be saved. All we can do is step back, and peal it off of our own hearts and give it up to God. This may be one of the hardest things to do as a Christian, and in a position where you are a giver and a protector to those in pain, hurting, and suffering. The evidence is, clear, and tallied, that sometimes you have done all you can and it wasn’t ever going to be enough because some things are just out of your control. A little boy left alone in a blood filled house, has no control over the actions of those around him. A girl who’s mother walked away and chose to have nothing to do with her daughter and the anger and resentment built over a lifetime, sometimes there’s nothing that little girl can do to fix anything when mom passes away unexpectedly. It hurts, and the pain and grief is very real. We all do things when we hurt, and sometimes we are just caught in the crossfire of life innocent and free from blame. Life up one another, and be there for one another. Don’t let time pass you by in anger because by the time you want to make amends, it may be too late. We may look at the evidence spread around us, but it takes a trained, unbiased eye to root out what is part of the incident, and what’s just there.

Go with God, and trust in God to see you through the darkest of storms. It’s hard to do, but seek Godly counsel, and friends who will help carry you through. God will always give us the tools we need to do any job, but we must look for them and put forth effort. No matter what happens, as time goes on, we will be faced with tough situations, and hard times, and it’s in those times when we are hurt we must forgive, and pray. We can’t allow the pain to build, along with the anger, to stay with us because it will affect every aspect of your lives, and mine as well. Walk in peace, and love, and forgiveness. Walk knowing we are forgiven for being sinners, as we will forgive others for sinning against us. We must ask for forgiveness for those we have wronged, and understand we aren’t always at fault for the things that happens to us. Don’t hold weight for things you aren’t responsible for, but be a Christian and take responsibility for what your actions have caused. Don’t get caught up in the past, and make sure you are looking at situations objectively.

 

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Parasite

Parasite

Are you allowing people to stay in your life who only come around for encouragement, or when they need something? These people drain your emotional resource but never replenish it. These people will never or rarely be there for you. I have had many difference parasites live in my life. I’ve had people who only come around when it’s convenient for them. These people come around to refill their supply of good vibes and then when they are full, they move forward again. Most of my life I’ve had people seem to use me for whatever they wanted, and then when it no longer suited them, they left. I’ve been host to many parasites over the years. One of my faults is not knowing that I’m being taken advantage of. Even people I’ve cared about have used me for their personal gain and once their goals were achieved, again, thrown away. People can truly be parasites and latch on and just like a leach, suck away your passion, your joy, your love, and leave you with next to nothing.

Recently I had a situation come up that really got me thinking about how others think.

About seven weeks ago I started talking to this seemingly nice lady online. We’d been talking on and off for that whole time, and finally the question came up ‘are we compatible’? I took a long look at what was on my list, and what I believe in, and what she believed in, and my answer was no, we aren’t. However, I felt that there was plenty of good qualities to maintain a friendship. When I told her I didn’t think a relationship would work, she abruptly said goodbye. I had a few minutes to talk with her about why she was leaving and no matter how I reasoned for a friendship, she was insistent on an all or nothing relationship. This struck me as odd because she would be willing to move into a relationship based on the last seven weeks but felt nothing about leaving a friendship. How can you talk to someone for seven weeks and be okay with a romantic relationship but you’re so quick to leave a friendship. I always thought you must have a good solid foundation of friends before the relationship can really flourish.

This situation has prompted me to ask a very important question, ‘if we aren’t compatible for a relationship are you willing to be friends?’ The question seems simple enough, but it’s led me to wonder what people s true motives are, and what drives them. There was no thought to how I would feel in this particular situation, only what was in it for her. Now, on the flip side I can hear some of you thinking ‘maybe she really liked you and she couldn’t just be friends.’ While yes, this is always a possibility, I didn’t get that impression at all in the conversation. With everything she had said, she really couldn’t see a benefit to being friends. This of course triggered an emotional response from me, as I questioned yet again my self-worth. It’s not easy feeling that kind of rejection. I’m sure she felt some form of rejection also, but she knew our beliefs weren’t the same and weren’t compatible so she also said no in a way, but the rejection was a friendship. I wonder what I failed to do in those seven weeks to show myself as a worthy friend. I wonder why I wasn’t good enough to be a friend. The thing is, and this is easy to say, hard to believe, it wasn’t about me at all. This was about what I could be for her, and that was her only thought. She too, thrives on taking from others, and cares little about what she gives in return.

Scripture talks about those who would take from you, use you, abuse you, and yet, I think it’s often overlooked. So many relationships are symbiotic and while sometimes this is a good thing, there are forms of symbiotic relationships that are harmful to one or both of the symbiont. The four types are mutualism, commensalism, parasitism, and competition. The one we’re going to discuss is parasitism. This is where one of the symbiotes is gaining something by taking it from the other relationship. In essence, calling someone a parasite in your life is not only accurate, but it happens in nature quite often, and people are no different. Remember though, you have a choice, you have a choice to live a life in love, or hate.

An article I found https://www.elitedaily.com/dating/one-sided-relationship/1269161gives a good account of the warning signs to look for if you think you may be in one of these relationships. It’s pretty clear these relationships are harmful, and must not be a long-term relationship. I encourage you to turn to scripture when you think you may be in this situation. Luke 8:17 (NKJV)17 “For nothing is secret that will not be revealed, nor anything hidden that will not be known and come to light” Remember that people aren’t going to be up front about their intentions, and they may not even realize what they are doing is harmful. It’s important to approach with love, and show concern towards the relationship and attempt to get your partner to change their ways. However, if this doesn’t happen, you need to have a long conversation with God about what’s best for you to do. You will be surrounded by opinions, and those may be good, they may be bad, but no matter what surrounds you, it’s important to followHebrews 12:1 (NKJV)“Therefore we also, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which so easily ensnares us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,”

Remember that if you are abundant with love, and a giving nature you are wealthy in spirit. People will want this, and it’s not just a wealth of money people seek, but anything that can be given is an object of affection. People sometimes want to have someone to serve them, or be their punching bag. People in abusive relationships are also in that symbiotic relationship, and as you give up your self to stay in that relationship, you are giving the other person power, control, by giving up your own. They thrive on that, and as long as you’re willing to stay, they will continue to feed on that. Proverbs 19:4“Wealth maketh many friends; but the poor is separated from his neighbour.”

Fear not though, because there is always a way out, and if you don’t know what that may be, or you need help figuring out the best course of action, or if you just need someone to talk to about it, I urge you to seek Godly counsel. I urge you to take a long hard look at what’s going on in your life. If your resource is being drained, perhaps counseling is needed, couples counseling, or individual at the very least. James 1:5“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him.” Seek God first in every situation, and trust that there is still hope. If you’re in a physically abusive relationship, I urge you to seek help right away. I urge you to stand up for yourself by removing yourself from a dangerous situation. Second is an emotionally abusive relationship, I urge you to seek counsel right away. Attempt to get into counseling, and see if you can change the statuesque.

No matter where you are in your life, always proceed with love. You can love someone, but that doesn’t mean they are healthy for you. As such you can love an addiction, but that doesn’t mean it’s good for you. You must have discernment with who you give abundantly too. Trust in the Lord to watch over you, and protect you. This doesn’t mean the Lord will snap his fingers and your abuser will stop abusing, but more, the Lord will give you a way out, people that will help you, but only if you seek. I’ve heard before “why did God let my ______ to abuse me?” See, God doesn’t let anyone get away with anything. Those things happen, but God doesn’t forget. You always have the ability to leave. It may not be easy, but you can leave. You will have to make a choice in your life, and trust in God to be there with you no matter what you choose to do.

If any who reads find yourselves in any of these situations, please pray about what you need to do, and please be sure to seek Godly counsel and help. Make sure you are safe and not in a dangerous situation. God will be with you, and God will be there to comfort your spirit. You don’t have to stay in those kinds of relationships. If you are a person who gives and gives and people take advantage over your kindness, your generosity, pray about what you are doing. What you have is a gift from God and we are told in scripture to use our gifts wisely and for what is edifying of the Holy Spirit. Love everyone, but don’t enable bad behavior. Use your gifts on those who truly need and appreciate them. Don’t waist your energy, your hard work, or even your own hard-earned money in some cases on those who aren’t willing to work for themselves. Use discernment in all you do.

I am praying for all of you that this post may touch in a special way, and I pray God gives you what you need to a better tomorrow.

Path Of The Warrior

Path Of The Warrior

Can you look in the mirror and tell yourself you’re your best self? What does your best self mean? That’s a deep question and it will undoubtedly raise a lot of little bubbles from your brain as you ponder the true meaning of what is your best self? Are you living your life to the best of your ability? Are you skating by just to do the least possible in your day? Are you working your life away letting the relationships pass you by? God has given us a balance of work and family responsibilities, but also to evangelize, to minister to those around us. When was the last time you stepped out into the deep end to really push yourself? When was the last time you were willing to give everything? These are tough, thought provoking questions but it’s truly something we all must face at some point. Are you truly alive, because it’s true, not all who live are truly alive?

This last weekend I was given the opportunity to attend a Warrior Health & Wellness Expo with the Wounded Warrior Project (WWP). While I was there I got to thinking how poorly I’d done keeping up with my health and wellness. My physical injuries have become a crutch, an excuse for me to become lazy and complacent with my physical well-being. Since my back injury I have gained almost 30 pounds in a year. That’s an egregious amount of weight in a year. I look at myself in the mirror and I don’t think it looks so bad, but when I see myself in photo’s I am ashamed at myself. In the last several years maintaining weight has become a challenge. It seems and feels that no matter what I eat, how well, or how poorly, I still gain weight, and loosing it is an incredibly difficult challenge. The thing is, when I gave up the fight I was not living to be my best self, and if I’m not my best self, I’m not the best warrior for Christ. I think in my humble opinion, if you aren’t fit mind, body, and soul we aren’t able to be fully prepared for the missions Christ may bestow upon us. In the Army we had a saying, and I think it applies to the path of Christ, “Fit to Fight”. Are we truly fit to fight for Christ?

Truly, we must ask ourselves, what if we gave our everything? We want to eat what we want, and do what we want, and we think there isn’t a cost. We have the mentality that ‘it’s our life’ and sadly, we couldn’t be more wrong. Our life is to live for Christ and if we aren’t taking good care of ourselves we aren’t living the best we can for Christ. We as a nation have become complacent and we are not taking time to take care of ourselves. 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (NASB)19 “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? 20 For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body.”  If someone bought us a nice car would we be grateful or would be trash it because we didn’t buy it with our own hard earned money? We cannot take our gift for granted, and we must accept that we only live because God breathed life into us. We were allowed to live and yet we walk around completely ungrateful.

Health is holistic meaning entire body, and if we are to be fit to fight we must be physically healthy and if our emotional health will be truly healthy the mind and the body are connected, then if one suffers, they both suffer. We must take our physical health as seriously as we would anything else in our life. If you are called are you ready to go? Are you afraid of the cost? What would you be willing to give up to follow Christ? Would you be willing to give up fast foods? Would you be willing to give up smoking, or sodas for Christ?

We need to take care of ourselves, and that starts with a simple word, honesty. We need to be honest about what’s going on inside our bodies. We need to be honest about our mental health. We need to be honest about our emotions. We need to be honest about our physical health. We can’t live in denial, afraid to face the challenges ahead. If we continue to kick the can down the road, eventually we’re going to have a pile of cans to deal with.

When I first had my back surgery I fell into a depression thinking of all the things I could no longer do. Instead of saying I can, my mantra at the time became, I can’t. I think many of us are like that today. It’s as easy as, my (blank) hurts so I can’t do this anymore. What we fail to realize is, there’s usually alternatives. When Paul was on his second mission journey he attempted to go into Asia many times, and each time was turned away. He never once said to God, ‘okay so I can’t go there, I’m going to just pack up and go home.’ He found another way, other places he could work. God doesn’t want us to just sit around, and we often think of our injuries, or illnesses as a hindrance, but what if those things are our Asia? What if we are meant to walk a different path because of those we will meet down the road in which we can minister too? Before my back injury I was doing well in the roll of security, and I was planning to move to Colorado, and start a new life there. Instead I had a major back injury, which led me to the path I’m on, which defiantly seems more God centered. While not everyone will go from a career into ministry, it’s still something you need to examine and really think about what are you doing in your newlife? It may be that you have new opportunities to minister, it may be that you have opportunities for missions, or even just a different brand of people. Either way, if you are walking with the Lord, you will find there’s a purpose for your change, for your injury, something God can turn tragedy into blessing. Romans 8:28 “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.”

I think of the path for Tony Stark in the movies, and that he was on a particular path in his life. He wasn’t using his gifts for the betterment of mankind. He was selfish, and cared little for the impact of the things he did, which affected the lives of thousands. He was wounded, captured, imprisoned for months, and this set him on a new path. Tony Stark went from party boy eccentric billionaire, to egotistical superhero. Something absolutely horrible had to happen to Tony to set him on his course to make a true difference in the world. No I’m not saying you all will become superhero’s but, think about where you are because of your illness, your disability, and think about the people you encounter because of it. Do you encounter others who are sick and disabled? Can you provide words of hope and encouragement in the name of Jesus Christ? Sure you can, and it’s likely that’s how God is going to use a horrible situation for good. Don’t give up, and don’t loose hope. If you are to be a warrior for Christ we must learn to change our perspective and stop focusing on the old normal, and look to the new normal. You’re a soldier, a warrior, and you can rise to the challenge. Find your peace in Christ, and then focus on your mind, body, soul, health. There are so many alternative exercises for just about anything, and so many ways to eat healthy, there really isn’t a good excuse for being lazy. I had to take a long hard look at myself to realize I am far from where I want to be. Sometimes it takes a little push of motivation, other times, it takes being pushed off the cliff. Don’t sit around feeling sorry for yourself, get up, get motivated, and find what you can do.

If you need Ideas for workouts here’s a few, first is DDPYoga. This is a great combination of yoga, physical therapy and dynamic resistance. This can be done from a chair, for a bed, from so many different places depending on your specific injury. https://ddpyoga.comThe second is TRX which uses a suspended strap designed for different heights, for different movements, but is amazing because it uses only your body weight and gravity to allow you to work out. https://www.trxtraining.comThe ease and simplicity of these two workouts is proof that you can workout in any position, any health level, and make a difference so you too will be fit to fight. We are call called to be champions for Christ and whether you’re the warrior in need of motivation, or you’re in a position to motivate others, lets get out there, and start making a difference for Christ.

 

 

Tipping Point

Tipping Point

How long will you travel down the road you’re on before you make a change in your life? Will you wait until you don’t have any other option? Sadly most people will refuse to change until the choice is no longer theirs to make. It seems the path towards self-destruction is a path that must run its course. Sadly I have watched people I’ve cared about hop on that train, and no matter what anyone did they had to ride along till it hit the brick wall, or as most people call it, hitting rock bottom.

What is it about that course that so many fall prey too? The human mind is a tricky thing, and when we truly take some time to think about it, why would anyone stay on such a self-destructive path? I think the answer is simple, and yet complicated at the same time. The simple answer is of coursesin, but the difficult answer is the complexity of the human brain. I think there’s something that happens inside the human brain that gets confused. Take a bad relationship for example. The whole world might realize a relationship is bad news, but the one person who doesn’t is the person in the middle of it. There can be emotional abuse, an over controlling element, or even physical abuse, and yet someone will stay in that situation till, they hit rock bottom. Much of that has to do with self-esteem, a notion of worthlessness, and an idea that no one else could ever love them, so it’s better to be mistreated by someone who ‘loves me’ than to be alone. Then there’s the alcoholic, substance abuse addicts, and workaholics who drive themselves towards destruction and rarely turn their own train before it smashes into the wall.

What can we do though, for those people who seem to be on those trains? Sadly the answer is not much, and any intervention may be a dangerous idea for the relationship. People often lash out when an intervention is staged. Admitting there’s a problem is incredibly difficult and always the first step to any real change. Every 12 step program is laid out very similar, and the first step is always the same.

  1. Admitting powerlessness over the addiction
  2. Believing that a higher power (in whatever form) can help
  3. Deciding to turn control over to the higher power
  4. Taking a personal inventory
  5. Admitting to the higher power, oneself, and another person the wrongs done
  6. Being ready to have the higher power correct any shortcomings in one’s character
  7. Asking the higher power to remove those shortcomings
  8. Making a list of wrongs done to others and being willing to make amends for those wrongs
  9. Contacting those who have been hurt, unless doing so would harm the person
  10. Continuing to take personal inventory and admitting when one is wrong
  11. Seeking enlightenment and connection with the higher power via prayer and meditation
  12. Carrying the message of the 12 Steps to others in need

 

While the 12 steps list a higher power, we as Christians must remember that it is God, Jesus Christ that can help us. No matter what situation you find yourself in, there are a few things that need to be mentioned. First, the creator of the universe loves you. Jesus Christ died for you, and you are special to Him. Second, you do not have to stay on the road you’re on. There is always help out there and all you have to do is ask for it. However, you must be willing to hear the truth, and face the challenge of making the change, which of course will not be easy. Third, you must trust that God can work out any bad situation, and there is something good to be taken from it. No matter the horrible things you’ve experienced in your life, i.e. rape, abuse (physical or emotional), loss, health issues, addictions, etc.) no matter what it is, there is something to be gained for it, and used in a positive way. Fourth, GOD DID NOT CAUSE YOUR SUFFERING, I cannot understate this. God is not in the habit of causing suffering in our lives. We must understand the nature of a sinful world, and a world endowed with free will. People choose to act how they want to. People choose to prey on the weak, to take other peoples power for their own. People choose to give in to the sin nature of this world. People choose to allow addictions to take hold by starting in the first place. People choose to rape, to abuse, to control, because it masks their own insecurities, and they themselves are not following Christ. We often want to blame God, instead of blaming the Devil. We want to ask God why He didn’t save us, and the truth is, he probably tried. We expect God to send us a miraculous intervention, where the truth is, there were probably people there who would have been willing to help, and maybe even tried to help. The problem is, sometimes we slap away the hands that try to help us.

It’s said we as people don’t truly change till we reach the precipice, the bottom of the barrel, the brick wall, but the truth is, you don’t have to wait that long. Addiction can be anything to include staying in bad abusive relationships, but there is hope. 1 Corinthians 10:13-14 (NKJV)13 “No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it. 14 Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry.” When we put anything before God that is our idol, and we are in essence worshiping that in which stands between God and us. If it’s work, or a substance, video games, whatever you can fill in the blank that takes the majority of your focus, there’s a time to walk away. Change is possible any time, anywhere, but YOU have to be willing to make that step towards change.

I have lost two wives to adultery and I remember asking what I had done to deserve it. I asked God why I was being punished, and what I didn’t realize at the time was it wasn’t God, no, it was Satan that had intervened in my life and brought destruction upon my home. 1 John 2:16 (NKJV)16 “For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world.” Every day people endure hardships, and they endure the pain of this life, and every day people cry out to the Father and ask what they have done, why did they deserve such horrible things, but the fact is, it’s a sinful world, and there will be troubles. God does not force people into His will and in turn God does not force people to sin. God did not force sin upon this world, but people choose to sin. As scripture says, God will ALWAYS give you a way out. It may not be easy, but God isn’t in the business of making life easy, but it is always what is right. “Dark times lie ahead of us and there will be a time when we must choose between what is easy and what is right.”(Albus Dumbledore)

If you’re in a position you want to change, or need to change, ask yourself, have you been talking to God about it? Has an opportunity to change been presented to you but you’ve not taken it? Is the situation truly bad, or is it that you’re just not happy? Are you putting your attention to objects, substances or people? No matter what’s going on in your life there is always hope in Christ. Remember that as you might have fallen victim at the hands of others, remember it’s free will that causes so much pain. The same free will that causes you pain, is also the same free will that allows you to walk away and turn to God. 1 Corinthians 6:12“All things are lawful for me, but all things are not helpful. All things are lawful for me, but I will not be brought under the power of any.” Don’t give away the power God has given to you. Don’t allow other people to take your happiness from you. When you trust in God you are given joy, and nothing can steal away your Joy. If you are in an abusive relationship, get help. If you are addicted to (blank) get help. Don’t walk through this life living in misery, there’s help out there for you. Be willing to make the hard decision for the hard change, but always turn to God for guidance. God will hear you, and God will answer you, so keep an eye open for it, and listen to the Holy Spirit guiding you. Have faith and don’t forget to love first, love God.

When the Excrement Happens

When the Excrement Happens

You know you’re about to do something pretty good when Satan throws you a curveball. It’s unclear how much the Angels know about what will happen into the future, but one thing’s clear, Satan does a good job trying to muck up a good thing. Any time something good and positive is going to happen especially things that are for good Christians, Satan likes to try and put a stop to it before hand. This coming weekend I am supposed to be away on another Wounded Warrior Project event, and trying to be prepared with my homework and everything else I have to do, Satan is trying to put a stop to my trip by literally putting a stop to my trip. Yesterday I was involved in a small auto accident in which my car, my poor, poor, car, might have seen it’s last day. Driving home from an appointment a nice guy, was just trying to get to where he had to go, but the way in which he did it, well, when you try to cut over two lanes to turn in bumper to bumper traffic that’s moving 35-40 miles per hour is going to cause problems. Without enough time I was cut off and less than 30 feet I was ill prepared to stop in time when he needed to turn into the shop he was going to. My little Chevy sonic was no match for his Honda Pilot. His bumper took next to no damage, while my car…. Well, it’s seen better days. Everyone walked away and thankfully my airbag never deployed. The impact was just high enough on my car to keep it from exploding in my face. The accident could have been much worse, and I’m thankful we were both all right. Cars can be replaced, people cannot.

I firmly believe that for a Christian who knows the Lord, who trusts in the Lord, who’s faith guides them, and not the world, Romans 8:28is so important, “And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to Hispurpose.” Bad things happen every day to good people, and sometimes it’s not easy to see the good in the midst of so much awful and terrible things. We can become numb to the world and cold and disconnected in time as Satan’s claws dig into our shoulders to drag us down. For instance, as soon as I got home 4 hours later then I was supposed to which put me 3 hours behind on homework, I received a phone call from a friend with terrible news. I began to minister to her, helping her through a tough time, still reeling from my own ordeal. Then not more then 2 hours later, I end up ministering to another friend who was also going through a pretty hard time, and a small albeit real crisis of faith. My cup ran over, and I knew I needed to step away and empty my own cup of stress before I could be effective. It was a good thing I did, because later that night I was faced with a third friend in need of spiritual guidance. Satan is moving in a big way in my life right now, and it’s not easy to stand there and be under a real spiritual attack. So what can we do when the attack comes?

I knew what was happening so I took a moment to reach out to one of two people that could help, my own best friend and pastor. Calling later then I think I’ve ever called I was relieved when he answered the phone. The conversation wasn’t very long, just enough to pray, talk about the quick issues, and we parted ways, in which I knew he would be praying for me till he went to bed. See, prayer is important. God hears our plea’s and God move the pieces into play to be where they are supposed to be, or where they are most needed. I called a second pastor friend of mine, and while he was unable to take the call, just the act of me calling showed my faith in prayer because knowing he’d see my missed call, I knew he’d pray for me on the spot. I was able to get through my night with only a few tears of stress, and although the schoolwork suffered a little, I know that the good certainly outweighed the bad!

 Trusting in God in the middle of the (expletive) storm isn’t easy, but when we know who’s still in control, we can be prepared for the flaming arrows Paul speaks of in Ephesians 6:10-18 10 “Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might. 11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the [a]wiles of the devil. 12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of [b]the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. 14 Stand therefore, having girded your waist with truth, having put on the breastplate of righteousness, 15 and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; 16 above all, taking the shield of faith with which you will be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked one. 17 And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God; 18 praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, being watchful to this end with all perseverance and supplication for all the saints”

 Trust in God and believe in the works that are happening to answer your prayers. As I referred to recently, God moves pieces around the chessboard and it’s important to know that it takes time to maneuver those pieces into play. Be patient in your walk with the Lord. “If I walk with the world, I can’t walk with God.”  Dwight L. Moody If we are walking with the Lord we know troubles will happen. We know that we will have opportunities to be pleasing to the Lord, and we trust these things because troubles were promised by our own Lord and Savior. Colossians 1:10-11 10 that you may walk worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; 11 strengthened with all might, according to His glorious power, for all patience and longsuffering with joy; We suffer long and with Joy. We are patient and trusting in God we may be strengthen by all of God’s might. By walking upright in the Lord we are blessed by the Spirit, and renewed our strength when the attacks come. Don’t loose hope for the world is darkened, designed to crush your spirit and drain the joy from you, but if you know the Lord, trust in the Holy Word of God, you know that this suffering is only temporary that you may be tempered and ready when you are called to do more. This isn’t home, so remember one thing, ‘flexible people can’t get bent out of shape.’ We are not consumed by the darkness of this world, because it’s the Light of Christ that brings us hope, and every morning is a new symbol of the hope left to us as Jesus ascended into Heaven.

Lamentations 3:22-23 (NKJV)

22 Through the Lord’s mercies we are not consumed,

Because His compassions fail not.

23 They are new every morning;

Great is Your faithfulness.